Singlespeeds Don't Lie, Don't Care...- Mtbr.com
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  1. #1
    34N 118W
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    Singlespeeds Don't Lie, Don't Care...

    The singlespeed bike is a perfect barometer for where your fitness level stands. If you've taken some extended time off the bikes, as I have, you will be rudely reminded by your bike that things ain't what they used to be.

    Remember a month ago when you could stand up and grind that long, steep climb? You might be completely winded at the top, but you made it. I was remembering that too, only this time I wheezed and coughed to a stop, threw a leg off and continued up the hill on foot. Thanks for the subtle reminder, O lovely pink bike of mine.

    The singlespeed is brutally honest. "What's that, friend? You say you took a few days off?" ponders the bike. "Well here's where you're at now. I'm sorry, does that hurt? If you're going to puke, please do it away from me."

    With the singlespeed, there are no easy days. There are no "I'm just going to shift into an easier gear and ease back into it" days. There are no "I usually do it in the third cog on the cassette but today I was on the second cog" days. There are no "Middle/one" or "Middle/two" days. You want an easier day? Ride around the block.

    The singlespeed is what it is and couldn't care less if you're out of shape. It can't sugarcoat things - thats not its nature. And its just as happy to take a rest while you sit on the side of the trail trying to regain a normal breathing pattern and clear vision.

    Your buddies will be more concerned than the bike will be. "You gonna be ok?" they'll ask, while your bike lies on the ground, having a great time looking up close at the leaves and insects.

    If you ride constantly and are in killer shape then life is good. But take some planned or unplanned time off and your singlespeed will be there waiting for you, more than happy to give you the no-bullhsit, Gods honest, right between the eyes truth. And in my case, the truth hurts. A lot.

    happy riding,
    HW
    Last edited by Hollywood; 01-24-2005 at 03:20 PM. Reason: tpyo

  2. #2
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    I guess I'm getting ready to find out. Should have the 'new" frame built up in 2 weeks. Hard to beleive I would consider giving up my X100 though!

  3. #3
    WAWE
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    Are you a little sore today?


  4. #4
    ali'i hua
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    either you discover how out of shape you are, or you find out something majorly wrong with your beloved SS. (sniff- still in mourning over the titus)

    thanks for the words, HW.

  5. #5
    34N 118W
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    If...

    Quote Originally Posted by aosty
    Are you a little sore today?

    if you're talking to my quads: Yes
    if you're talking to my 'taint: Yes

  6. #6
    King Pin
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    ... and if we just ...

    I'm actually getting anxious about getting back on the SS after eight months or so doing nothing but fixie....on road and off.

    32/19 may be way too easy after dealing with 34/16 or 18 and 45/18. You reckon??

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood
    if you're talking to my quads: Yes
    if you're talking to my 'taint: Yes
    wow, taint isn't censored...i'm a little sick...

  8. #8
    Fight the Kakistocracy!
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    Word!

    I rode a trail yesterday that I usually ride about once every year and a half, well it has been the obligatory year and a half, off to Kentucky Camp I go. Last time I did this, was on a gearie dual squishy. This time, the trusty exploSSif with a bomber on it. It took a bit longer, but I was out for being out and not training, I was also by myself taking pics (post to follow ASAP). I rode all the parts that I remember having to gear down, surprised myself on a few spots as well. I might have better technique is all. Nice post Hollywood, I look forward to more. My post on Kentucky Camp will try to be in the "Hollywood Style" with pics telling the story more than the words.
    veelz

    Gravity, not just a good idea, it's a law.
    The only one consistently and constantly applied, no exceptions.

  9. #9
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    very well put. I've been off for a while as a result of an injury, and I even geared down when I started riding again, but sure enough the single knows the score... Yikes...


    respect
    marc
    www.fatmarc.com

  10. #10
    "Mr. Britannica"
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    Come on man... The SS is a woman. She will slap you silly if you don't pay her 'nuf attention. You know this!

    Time for another world famous Hollywood photo-essay.

  11. #11
    Des(s)ert Rat
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    I hate winter lungs.

  12. #12
    Des(s)ert Rat
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    Mine's a Surly little child that hates it when it's neglected.

  13. #13
    ----woof----
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    I rode Aliso/Woods yesterday and after not being able to ride due to the rain soaked trails and illness, I'm definitely feeling it today, especially my lower back. Ended up walking sections I normally would clear, my pace was about 2 mph slower, and I shortened my normal loop by 8 miles. ARRGGGHH!

    Initially toyed with the idea about taking the Blur cuz I knew I'd be outta shape, but after the last ride with the chain skip and sluggish feel I thought "Nah, the SS will still be funner!"

  14. #14
    singlespeed smash brother
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    After too much food over Xmass and my wedding after new years and the subsiquent 2 week honey moon where all I did was eat sleep and other newly wed business< I've returned 5 kg heavier and my both my commute ss and mtb ss have been sreaming at me like a premenstral drill seargent to get my lardy but back into shape. The hurt and shame is not good and my wife has been told that next time we're on holidays the bike comes too.

  15. #15
    Armor by Band-Aid
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood
    The singlespeed bike is a perfect barometer for where your fitness level stands.
    ...
    happy riding,
    HW
    Man, you ain't kidding! My legs felt like mush yesterday and it was so hard to put any real torque on the cranks... The boulders in the photo below used to be trivial when I was in decent shape, but yesterday my legs were lacking and once I hopped up on the first boulder I had trouble turning the crank to finish up the follow-through over the second boulder. Took three tries to clean it... That''s just not right!

    <img src="https://www.fooriders.com/images/rides/green/cimg0779.jpg">

  16. #16
    Not because I'm fast.....
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    You said that right Hollywood! After some time off the singlespeed I get to the top of a steep climb and pace back and forth trying to find my lungs while my friends ask me if I am OK. It feels like the times when you were a kid and get the wind knocked out of you and your friends ask if you are OK... you just nod because you can't talk.

    I usually call that spot the "grundle", but I have a medical background.

  17. #17
    I am the owl
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood
    Singlespeeds Don't Lie, Don't Care...
    Amen brother.
    SingleSpeedOutlaw .com
    Riding Bikes and Drinking Beer.

  18. #18
    resident crackpot
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    I had a day just like that eaerlier this fall Hollywood. Newish trail begged to be ridden and broken in some more after late Spring flash flooding. Ground was so soggy that the leaves and mud built up so much that the front wheel literally stopped turning at one point...skidding. Not really 'mud' per se, but slippery sh!t that just plain stuck to everything. The single speed did not give a care whether or not I could barely pedal, she just wanted to keep going. This trail in particular is dead flat in the river bottoms. It almost felt like I had put road gears on it. I was really in shape (for me) then and hadta walk the .25 mile railroad stretch just to freshen up.

  19. #19
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    So true, gained 4 kg during christmas and didn´t ride a mile, went out on my normal tour last Sunday and I swear on the top of a normal easy climb I all but puked, taste of blood in mouth and black spots before eyes. Never happened with gears on the bike. Well the fat should disappear quickly from my softened body I guess...

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by aosty
    Are you a little sore today?

    33 miles and climbing 5200' has its effects.
    Attached Images Attached Images

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood
    The singlespeed is brutally honest. "What's that, friend? You say you took a few days off?" ponders the bike. "Well here's where you're at now. I'm sorry, does that hurt? If you're going to puke, please do it away from me." HW
    Thanks, I needed that. Geared bike stays in the garage this weekend, no matter what the ride is.

    Good stuff!

  22. #22
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    ...

    wuss.

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by pacman
    33 miles and climbing 5200' has its effects.
    What's the deal? Sleeping with the ex?

    What happend to the pink fork?

  24. #24
    34N 118W
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    my cheatin' heart

    Pinky is young, stupid and selfish. She don't treat her man right. "Look at me, I look good" is all I hear. Me Me Me.

    Marzi's more mature and takes care of me like I deserve to be taken care of. When I take her out for 6 hours of torture, I need some lovin'!

    Pinky is fun for a quick & dirty roll through the brush. But for the long haul relationship, I like my stout Italian lady with the gentle touch.

    HW

    PS - thanks Pacman for putting my agony on display!

    Quote Originally Posted by SoloWithOthers
    What's the deal? Sleeping with the ex?

    What happend to the pink fork?

  25. #25
    34N 118W
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    beat it

    Quote Originally Posted by ernesto_from_Wisconsin
    wuss.
    pull that gnome off your d!ck and go ride your bike. Hard. Then make your wife dinner for putting up with your b!tchy ass.


    HW

  26. #26
    mtbr member
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    bítches

    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood
    pull that gnome off your d!ck and go ride your bike. Hard. Then make your wife dinner for putting up with your b!tchy ass.


    HW
    My bikes are my bítches! If they wanna make me hurt, it's all because it hurts so good.

    For dinner: gnome fillet a la Interbike (dressed in a hot pink bikini)

    I make dinner for no one! Remember, I am CHOLO! and I make womyn do my bidding, all Telemundo n' sh!t.
    Last edited by ernesto_from_Wisconsin; 01-25-2005 at 12:26 PM. Reason: spanish profanities

  27. #27
    34N 118W
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    I know whatcha mean...

    I know that when I hop up on 3 ft. rocks, my legs really feel it. So do my ribs and ass when I go crashing outta control back down to earth.

    Show off.

  28. #28
    Cold. Blue. Steel.
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    usual great stuff...

    besides your pink, unforgiving wench, who are the other 2 lovely ladies in the picture? behind you, no less. what kind of gentleman do you pretend to be?! open the trail door for a lady!
    Spinning and Grinning...

  29. #29
    Medium?
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    Quote Originally Posted by ernesto_from_Wisconsin
    wuss.
    Gotta agree. Shut up and ride.

    I will admit that my fixie hurt me pretty bad on the first 34 mile commute last week. The second, two days later, was easier, and by the time I did it this am, it was starting to feel as flat as it really is.

  30. #30
    Whatever! Just crash it!
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    I just keep reminding myself all of that suffering is 100% self inflicted. That adds in a few interesting twists into the "single speed psyche" thang.

    Peter
    If a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. If a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute.

    Bike Wrench Blog ** Unfortunate Series of Events

  31. #31
    Recovering Weight Weenie
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    No kidding, H.
    Even while basking in the afterglow of my virgin ride on my geared bike...as hard/long as it was..I knew...that I had just added to the pain just a little of getting back on the SS.
    IME, there is no other activity, not a road bike, a gearie, a run, nothing, that can slap me down like a red-headed stepchild, the way the SS can and does.

    p.s. Hey Ernesto, shouldn't you grow a mustache if your going to be all Telemundo and cholo style? Eh, Ese? Whachoo lookeeng at, eh?

  32. #32
    mtbr member
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    I can't believe pink let you go back with that italian hussy!


  33. #33
    Back of the pack fat guy
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    agreed, sorta

    As usual, great stuff from H-wood. I feel his pain - took my first SS ride (and only my second mountain bike ride) in the last month this past Sunday. (Also, it was my first full rigid SS ride in several months...) In the interim I've been running and riding either CX or road. Can't say it felt too terribly bad - certainly no worse than a regular SS ride. It sure was nice given the ol' Surly some lovin' again, though!
    Attached Images Attached Images

  34. #34
    ballbuster
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    Is that....

    Quote Originally Posted by pacman
    33 miles and climbing 5200' has its effects.
    .... Impy back there? Tell her I say 'hey!'

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