funny floridian thinks going fast on a singlespeed is not possible- Mtbr.com
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  1. #1
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    funny floridian thinks going fast on a singlespeed is not possible

    This guy is a riot. After I suggested a singlespeed would cure his chain slap "problem", he just got funnier and funnier by the post. <a href="http://groups.google.com/groups?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&c2coff=1&th=62fa5306cff9b95f&seekm=8KoYb.12970%2 4fE4.10507%40bignews5.bellsouth.net#link1"> Check this! </a>

  2. #2
    Needed Less ~ Did More
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    If he pays for the plane ride....

    Quote Originally Posted by J.D.
    This guy is a riot. After I suggested a singlespeed would cure his chain slap "problem", he just got funnier and funnier by the post. <a href="http://groups.google.com/groups?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&c2coff=1&th=62fa5306cff9b95f&seekm=8KoYb.12970%2 4fE4.10507%40bignews5.bellsouth.net#link1"> Check this! </a>
    ...I'll pay for his race entry AND ALLOW TO RIDE HIS GEARED BIKE in the SSWC 2004, can't say fairer than that! Lets see how many of the "slow" singlespeeders finish before him?

    Some people...(shakes head and walks off)

    SSP
    Last edited by Singlespeedpunk; 02-21-2004 at 12:54 PM. Reason: Scotland lost the rugby / I'm drunk / Can't spell.....
    "Put any one on one of these singlespeed bikes and they could not help but have fun"
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    Otis Guy talking about klunkers c1976

  3. #3
    KgB
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    He obviously doesn't no the Florida SS bunch

    That I know.
    I've been inside too long.

  4. #4
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    signel speed not fast enough?

    the world fastest speed record was 152 mph set by some guy on his single speed, and also, correct me if im worng, but wasnt some major 24 hr of adrenaline championship won by a team on custom single speed bikes built by jericho? Not fast enough? I dont think so

  5. #5
    Paintbucket
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    Gawd that's painful

    Would someone just tell him to put it in the big ring and leave it there?
    Last edited by wooglin-at-home; 02-21-2004 at 01:25 PM.
    Zippy for president

  6. #6
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    I wish I could smoke this guy.. but I am just another slow Floridian enjoying the outdoors with a beautiful Vulture 29" SS(among other bikes). To me it's about sharing the ride, not riding someone into the ground, although this doofus deserves a healthy dose of humble pie! I will say my local trials are extremely tight and technical (Alafia).
    SB

  7. #7
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    It's like everybody on the thread had to get the last word on the subject

    Jeez-Can't they just go wrestle for it or sumthin?

    Geo

  8. #8
    My post is that way --->
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    I'm generally quite happy for people like that to wallow in their own ignorance. Leave them to their science about cadences and muscle glycogen. There is a good chance they will actually learn something about it on the trail. But that was funny, in an a-mb "Pile-on" kind of way. Kind of like a pack of lions toying with a baby gazelle before putting it out of its misery.

    Surprised noone mentioned Travis Brown's performance against competitors probably slightly more capable than Florida's best.
    Wibble

  9. #9
    Has a 19 inch Unit
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    OMGawd!!!!

    Absolutely hilarious - Thanks for sharing

  10. #10
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    absolutely amazing.

    Love what you've done with the place, JD. Look forward to the continuation of the thread.
    -Porkchop

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by J.D.
    This guy is a riot. After I suggested a singlespeed would cure his chain slap "problem", he just got funnier and funnier by the post. <a href="http://groups.google.com/groups?hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&c2coff=1&th=62fa5306cff9b95f&seekm=8KoYb.12970%2 4fE4.10507%40bignews5.bellsouth.net#link1"> Check this! </a>
    that is very funny.tell him to look at the bump and grind results here in alabama where I won the expert 30-39 class by 5:20 on a ss and its a big ring course with a few big climbs. nothing like spinning at 200 plus rpm's

  12. #12
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    Tubeless is right!

    I was there. They all thought he was crazy. Then they wondered where he went! That convinced me about the SS thing. At the local home trail tace this year SSrs won one of the expert classes and all but one of the sport classes!

    BTW tubeless, TI RULES!!!!

  13. #13
    KgB
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    Tubeless man did one of the fastest laps

    At the 24 hours of adrenaline.On a pretty mediocre ss bike(no offense Tubeless)
    Right there with the Pro times,or faster.
    I've been inside too long.

  14. #14
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    thanks for a lot of laughs, Jerry!

    jeez, that guy is so farkin' clueless... and like one of those sandbottomed inflatable clowns, you punch 'em and they bounce right back at ya for another punch.

    not only that, he couldn't keep time to the music.

    well-done, Jerry!

  15. #15
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    Ha

    Quote Originally Posted by gonzostrike
    jeez, that guy is so farkin' clueless... and like one of those sandbottomed inflatable clowns, you punch 'em and they bounce right back at ya for another punch.
    Now THAT'S funny! What a great analogy, Sean. I remember those damn things from the 60's. As long as they keep popping up, they'll keep getting popped.

    I think the most ludicrous thing he posted so far was his notion that trials riders were not fit. Pure idiocy at its finest.

  16. #16
    nachos rule!
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    what a hoot!

    that is some funny sheite, mon.

    thing that cracked me up the most is that the idiot in question has never ridden ss, doesn't know anybody that rides ss, has never ridden with anybody who was riding ss, but he just KNOWS that all us fools on ss are slow.

    i'm amazed at how much faster and fitter i've gotten since switching to ss (yep, all my other mtbs are full-time dust magnets now), and the fastest dudes i ride with ride ss almost exclusively. i'm sure everybody here sings pretty much the same tune, but then again we (SHOCK!!!) actually ride ss instead of postulate about it.

    gotta love it!
    plus a change, plus c'est la m'me chose - alphonse karr

  17. #17
    Master of the Obvious
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    Fast as liquid!

    Thanks soo much for sharing! That thread was a riot. I don't think I have ever been passed by someone on a liquid, Not that there is anything wrong with liquids they are a great bike I just don't see them as racer's to much travel for XC and to little for serious Downhill . I don't think he will get a clue but maybe he will start counting derailers on the trail, I don't know how many times I have buzzed some one one a trail for them to notice later at a trailhead that I'm on a SS. that's it I'm outey

  18. #18
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    Gitcher milk & cookies, kids

    Quote Originally Posted by J.D.
    This guy is a riot. After I suggested a singlespeed would cure his chain slap "problem", he just got funnier and funnier by the post. Check this!
    Have mercy, he knows not of what he speaks. Unfortunately, without even reading all his posts, I can *wince* probably relate to the guy. Listen to this...

    shiggy and Coonskins went the SS route and it wasn't until I saw the effects that doing so had on them (turned them into much stronger riders, usually off the front of the pack, plus they actually enjoyed the experience) that I began to think that there might actually be something to this SS thing.

    Story time, kiddies, so first go get your jammies!

    The first time I went riding with Coonskins following his conversion to singlespeeder was on the Middle Fork Willamette River Trail outside of Oakridge, Oregon a few years ago. River trails are usually fairly mellow, but I knew of a few steepies on that trail that I could clean in my granny and I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt he couldn't clean with his single. Up 'til that point I rarely had any trouble getting or staying in front of Coonskins either uphill or down, and I was confident that when we reached the (up) steepies on Middle Fork Trail that day I'd ride right past 'Skins while he paused trailside for those of us still riding to sail on by.

    Not the case.

    Yeah, he couldn't clean the steepies with his SS. And I could clean 'em in my granny -- I was right about that. But he wasn't exactly standing off to the side of the trail while us gearies rode past. He ran up the steepies in front of us. Ran up 'em faster than I could grind up 'em in my granny. He was never behind me that day -- not one time that whole stinkin' day.

    Sorry, but this is a long story and it ain't over yet. Stay with me.

    Later that year we did one of the hardest short rides I know of -- the Saddleblanket Slam. Only 16 miles on the bike but it feels like three times that many (you also bag two peaks on foot). In advance of the ride Coonskins said he was going to ride his singlespeed. I just laughed to myself. I knew "The Slam" is ALL steep. But by that time 'Skins had become strong from riding his singlespeed all summer. REALLY strong. He rode off the front and I could not keep him in sight. The only times I saw him all day were the times he stopped and waited for those of us behind him to regroup.

    I was humbled that day by his ability on the bike. And continued to be humbled the rest of that year and into the next. Suddenly the guy who I used to be able to ride away from anytime I wanted to had become the guy who could ride away from me anytime he wanted to.

    He still is.

    But he inspired me to become a singlespeeder, too. Which was in total contradiction to my former beliefs about the discipline of singlespeeding.

    Now there are quite a few of us SSers in the Disciples of Dirt MBC. And I'll tell y'all this: on group rides, it's us SSers who're the ones off the front. We really don't have any choice. It's ride the damn thing or walk, and when you only have one gear, you have to make it work.

    I've never looked back.

    Story's over, kiddos. Bedtime!

    Hugs,
    Uncle Sparty
    disciplesofdirt.org

    We don't quit riding because we get old.
    We get old because we quit riding.

  19. #19
    Cracker-magnon
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    Thanks for the story Unka Sparty, can I have wiskey in my hot chocolate before bed?
    "Life is a F@#^ing story problem, get used to it - my son.

  20. #20
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    Ok I couldn't get this doofus outta my head today! He says and I quote :"that are very fast
    expert class racers, and they are riding on bikes like the Intense X-country
    bike, and on Santa Cruz Blurs." Since when does a swanky bike instantly make someone too fast to be caught by a SS? Ok so someone spank this guy with a Redline or KHS SS, or better yet Terminauts Huffy! ARGH! FL isn't the best place to ride off-road, but it ain't all bad.
    SB

  21. #21
    Eric the Red
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    I love flying by some guy on an Epic or a Blur or some other really pimp fs bike on a rocky downhill riding my rigid ss. I love passing guys on climbs who are riding super nice xc bikes w/full xtr kits. I love hearing the guy doing awards say "Dude, this guy was 30 seconds off the fastest lap time, ON A SINGLE SPEED!" I used to be a huge slow slob, but now my duallie gathers dust, and others eat my dust.

    Quote Originally Posted by SuperBad
    Ok I couldn't get this doofus outta my head today! He says and I quote :"that are very fast
    expert class racers, and they are riding on bikes like the Intense X-country
    bike, and on Santa Cruz Blurs." Since when does a swanky bike instantly make someone too fast to be caught by a SS? Ok so someone spank this guy with a Redline or KHS SS, or better yet Terminauts Huffy! ARGH! FL isn't the best place to ride off-road, but it ain't all bad.
    SB

  22. #22
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    Dude...

    Quote Originally Posted by edoz
    I love flying by some guy on an Epic or a Blur or some other really pimp fs bike on a rocky downhill riding my rigid ss.
    Uh.... is this the same Eric? How sweet those words are to hear, from one of the most convincing full-sus riders of all!

    You fast jerk.
    I'm gonna get you.
    That's right, you.
    Lawton.
    You're mine.
    No flats this time.
    You better take off fast, and keep lookin' back, 'cause I'll be there.
    Grinning.

    Ding-ding.
    Last edited by PBnJ; 02-23-2004 at 05:16 PM.
    -Porkchop

  23. #23
    Eric the Red
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    Oh I'll take off fast buddy, and I won't have to look back because I know that back there is where you'll stay. I hope you have a flat again this year. You know why? It'll give you a good excuse instead of having to admit to the world that my kung fu is better.

    Quote Originally Posted by PBnJ
    Uh.... is this the same Eric? How sweet those words are to hear, from one of the most convincing full-sus riders of all!

    You fast jerk.
    I'm gonna get you.
    That's right, you.
    Lawton.
    You're mine.
    No flats this time.
    You better take off fast, and keep lookin' back, 'cause I'll be there.
    Grinning.

    Ding-ding.

  24. #24
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    Awww!

    Quote Originally Posted by edoz
    my kung fu is better.

    Your "kung fu" is better, huh? Isn't that precious! Listen up, old man, a title in Arkansas means more than one in Oklahoma, and you know it. I'll come beat you on your home turf like you dream of being beaten. Better start drilling holes to shave weight now. Not much time left.

    Ding-ding.

    .
    -Porkchop

  25. #25
    Eric the Red
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    Yeah, but what's two Oklahoma titles worth? Plus, you can kiss another Arkansas title goodbye if I'm anywhere near the state on racedays. Keep dreaming about beating me on my turf, 'cause I'm in shape from drilling holes in your mom.

  26. #26
    KgB
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    good story Sparty

    Mines similiar.After spending a weekend on my spanking new dually in North Carolina. A friend,Kreeger schooled me on singlespeeding.I built a SS within a week and I haven't looked back.
    Ironically Kreeger went back to geared riding.One of the fastest and smoothest MoFos that I ever rode with when he was on SS.
    I've been inside too long.

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