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  1. #1
    Out spokin'
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    Ambassador to Cycling

    I was at about mile 60 when he passed me in his ~15 year old white Ford pickup. Lift kit, gun rack, American flag sticker in the rear window (not that there's anything wrong with any of those things.) I was inside the fog line, but not by much. Maybe a couple of feet. Evidently it was enough to push the redneck over the line, though, as he gave me the one finger salute after he came around me.

    I confess I've had a lot of pent up energy lately. No, I didn't respond to him in kind, but as he disappeared up the road in front of me I began to stew about the situation. The farther I pedaled up Fox Hollow Road, the more pissed off I became. I decided that if the coward was stupid enough to leave his pickup out in his driveway where I could see it, I was going to call him out.

    Sure enough, a mile further up the road there was the pickup parked in the dirt driveway of his mobile home. Loud music poured out of the front door, cutting the warm Sunday silence like a chainsaw.

    "Any cowards in there!?," I yelled at the top of my lungs, as I got off my bike and laid it on the road's shoulder.

    He came out. "Yeah, that'd be me," he said. "You f---in' bikers are so f---in' stupid! Ya think ya f---in' own the f---in' road!"

    Something in me snapped. I told him he was an idiot. An idiot who thinks HE owns the road. I called him a coward again. "If you weren't a coward, you would have told me what you wanted to tell me and not driven away in your pickup like a coward." (For the record, I probably included some "f---in'" in my discourse as well.)

    Now HE was pissed, too. "Want some o' THIS coward?," he dared me.

    Ah, confrontation at its finest -- mano a mano. At first I thought maybe I'd overreacted. Better just pick my bike up and be on my way. I started to reach for my handlebar... but all my pent up energy just wouldn't let me do it. I straightened up. "Yeah... hell YEAH! As a matter of f---in' fact I DO!," I said as I stepped into his face and pushed his chest, almost knocking him on his ass.

    He didn't fall down. So I pushed him again. Now he was REALLY pissed.

    He started swinging. So did I. He tagged me a couple times in the head, and it was about that time that I realized I should have taken off my helmet, sunglasses and Camelbak before the fists started flying. I deflected most of his attempts though, and I wonder if I connected with his dense cranium even once. I don't care. I'd made my point. He was a jerk and I wasn't afraid to tell him so.

    Arms still cocked in the ready-standby position, we stopped to look one another in the eye. I could tell that neither of us wanted to continue our endeavor at amateur boxing. A discussion ensued. Actually an argument at first, but then it calmed into a discussion. Eventually he actually listened to what I had to say about drivers who think they're better than cyclists. I listened to him complain about cyclists who ride four-abreast up his road and don't share the lane. I informed him that a lot of jerks ride bikes, but the guy he'd flipped off wasn't riding four-abreast -- I was riding alone and sharing the lane. I also pointed out that a lot of jerks drive automobiles -- and some of them give the finger to cyclists from the safety of their vehicles, even when it's undeserved.

    Fortunately we'd passed the point of hitting one another.

    He apologized. I apologized for starting a fight. He told me his name is George. I introduced myself. We shook hands. I picked my helmet visor up out of the middle of the road.

    I don't know if I accomplished anything. I still have lots of pent up energy, and I still despise drivers who think they are superior to cyclists simply by virtue of the fact that they reside within the protective confines of multi-ton, fossil-burning behemoths that insulate them from the outside world.

    But man, oh man, did it ever feel good to get in a fistfight on a sunny day out in the country. My first fistfight ever, I might add.

    I hope George thinks twice before he flips another cyclist off. I know I'll think twice about calling a redneck a coward, especially while I'm wearing lycra and standing on his turf. =]

    Happy Trails, everybody.

    --Sparty
    Last edited by Sparticus; 03-28-2004 at 03:34 PM. Reason: yeahbutt...
    disciplesofdirt.org

    We don't quit riding because we get old.
    We get old because we quit riding.

  2. #2
    My post is that way --->
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    Haha! Way to go. I'm sure we all have wanted to do that at some point. Personally I think the best I would have managed would have been to defecate in his pick-up. Picking a fight with a gun-owning coward can be hazardous to your health.
    Wibble

  3. #3
    KgB
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    great story

    that is some funny sh!t,a helmet and a camelback in a fight,that's great.
    remind me to never pick a fight with a downhiller.

    The remainder of the ride must have been good with all the adrenaline pumping.
    I've been inside too long.

  4. #4
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    dang!

    At least you got it resolved, the important thing is that you didn't slash his tires...

  5. #5
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    Wow. We have some of those same rednecks here in Central OR and man do they get to me. I know exactly how you feel. I've made the same promise to my self but I've never stumbled across there secret lair after they've passed me with the one finger salute.

    I just hope he got something positive out of your confrontation.

    I would pay big money for a picture of you in spandex standing toe to toe with the redneck.

  6. #6
    34N 118W
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    In this corner....

    holy crud dude! You acted out something that most of us hope never happens. I say congrats for standing up to him and reprezentin' the cyclists, in spandex to boot. Glad it all simmered and hopefully has some long term benefit too.

    "WHO WANTS SOME???"
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  7. #7
    "Mr. Britannica"
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    one of the best cyclist v. motor vehicle stories I've ever heard

    goes like this (the short version).... big dude gets run off the road and down into a ditch just before a stop sign. Dude picks up a potato size rock and launches it up in the air, breaks window of the car, now at the stop sign. Car backs up to the scene, driver gets out. Biker dude is now climbing out of ditch, see driver coming towards him. Driver realizes that biker dude is much bigger, and gets back into car and speeds away. True (supposedly). Sometimes the good guys win.

  8. #8
    Not because I'm fast.....
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    Advice for you....

    You gotta squirt him in the eye with your camelback drink tube, and while he is wiping his eyes, you let him have it one time in the nose. Then, as he is stunned for a minute, get out your 27-in-one Topeak Alien tool and open every one of those tools and hold it in your fist. When he can finally see straight, he'll think you'll have morphed into some terminator or something!

    Seriously though, the days of a fair fist fighting are over and it's just too risky these days. You either end up shot or the other guy presses charges and you do time for assault and battery Unfortunately, I have been in more than my fair share of fights, and one ended up with a handgun being pulled on me. Not fun.

    I have learned to turn the other cheek even though it's really hard sometimes. I am really glad you guys could work it out and no real damage was done.

    Oh yeah....Happy Monday everyone!

  9. #9
    mtbr member
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    Remind me not to road ride with ya o-k?.

    Don't need any fisticuffs out there.. really.

    See ya Friday.

  10. #10
    Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
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    Good job! sunday road rage...

    i was only at about mile 25, but it was pretty hot yesterday afternoon. i needed to make a left turn on my return trip from san onofre across a divided 2 lane (each way, plus 2 turning lanes). i usually try to get to the left turn lane with the cars, but traffic was too thick so i just went through the intersection i wanted to turn left at (green light) and waited for the light to turn.

    i was on the street, but completely within the confines of the bike lane at the intersection, waiting for the light to change from red to green so i could cross. next to me on my left was a middle aged fat man in a white lexus suv - the big one. i'm sunburnt and a little tired and i don't notice that he has designs on making a right on red. no suprise that i don't know he wants to turn, because of course, he's not using his blinker.

    he starts crowding me, then starts honking at me. i shoot daggers at him with an evil stare from behind my carbon rudy projects and give him the finger. he's shocked, as though he's amazed that 1) someone thinks he's being a selfish prick and 2) that a spandex clad cyclist would dare stand up to the pilot of a land yacht. he pulls into the oncoming traffic and stops in front of me, trying to decide what to do. he started to pull off to the shoulder, as if he was man enough to do anything once outside the confines of his 6,000 lb. truck. i'd guess he was in his late 40s, with his freakin' daughter in the passenger seat next to him. apparently, he decided that it would be best if she didn't witness her dad get his ass handed to him by a big sweaty road biker, and sped off. nice lesson to teach your kid on a sunday afternoon.

    i am truly impressed that you went for it, Sparty. you the man!
    Last edited by eSSq; 03-29-2004 at 09:53 AM.

  11. #11
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    dangers...

    Quote Originally Posted by eSSq
    ...was a middle aged fat man in a white lexus suv - the big one...
    ignorant HBFKs are dangerous to us cyclists. Not just them, but just ignorant drivers in general.

    HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK = Fatmerica

  12. #12
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    Run-ins with cars suck...

    Quote Originally Posted by ernesto_from_Wisconsin
    ignorant HBFKs are dangerous to us cyclists. Not just them, but just ignorant drivers in general.

    HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK HBFK = Fatmerica
    I was heading down a local busy road (had to, was commuting home) and had a guy try to pull out of a side street and cut me off. He wasn't fast enough though so he stopped and ended up making me have to go out into traffic (to fast for me to try to go behind him). I just shake my head as I go by, that was enough to make this guy snap. He peels out behind me, zooms by, then tries to cut me off again by turning into a car dealership parking lot. But he pulled to far in, so I just keep cruising right on by as he jumps out of his car and starts yelling. Course, I did flip him the bird this time (I really shouldn't have).

    I've also had plenty of run-ins with Land Yachts. People just feel invincible in them. I'm with Ernesto, too many HBFK's and ignorant drivers!

    KavuBiker
    knocking on wood, no major bike-car accident yet...

  13. #13
    Recovering couch patato
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    Great story! I did go into discussion with motorists before, confronting them with the fact that hadn't my brakes be so well-tuned, they'd now be explaining my unplanned death to a policeman.

    Over where I live, the odds of finding a motorist (or home owner) with a gun are about the same as finding a girl with a nice mom. Worst case scenario, the motorist ruins your face. That's what gun laws are good for. They don't help against rednecks though, but at least a bigger percentage of motorists here is a cyclist himself, too.
    Klok - XC - Skate - Ski

  14. #14
    Single Speed Junkie
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    Driving

    Two weekends ago I was riding my mountain bike on the road to go pick up my fuel sucker from the mechanics. I happened to be windy as hell and with my luck all head wind, but I was happy to just get out for a few regardless of weather conditions after our harsh winter. Was ridding along the confines of the white strip when an early 90’s Chevy truck decides to make a right in front of me with out the usage of blinkers or any courtesy towards the biker scum (me). I hit the brakes hard, thankfully I did take the mountain bike otherwise I would of eaten door. She proceeds to pull into the parking lot where my mechanics shop happens to be located and is a bit confused on where to park since the lot is nearly full so she obviously chooses the middle to park. I ride up to the driver’s window and ask her if she plans on committing a homicide today with her driving tactics. She yells back at me that all people on bikes belong on the sidewalk along with a few other obstinacies. I reply back with a few choice comments of my own, none of which very pleasant and proceed inside to pay for my auto. She looks around for a second thinking of where to park still for a moment until she looks over towards me once more and decides that her car might not actually need to get into the shop today and speeds away. Unfortunately my father happens to work for this shop and catches some flack for having his son scare away customers.
    Thankfully I informed him of this right after it happened, he just told the owner that having a homicide on their property is going to hurt business more than having me rip one possible customer a new *******.
    I have had several negative encounters with motorists while riding which tends to build up a bit of rage when we actually are able to catch one in the act. Did that one person deserve it, I think so, and after all I did hold back from dragging her out of the car and proceed to further educate her on the finer point of what it feels like to impact an auto.

    Have a friend that was struck by the postal service while out riding landing him in the ICU for a few weeks and delayed his medical schooling by over 6 months. The accident happened to be 100% his fault since his head went through the windshield causing permanent amnesia and disability that still continues.

    I think that the majority of auto/bicycle accident should be driver fault with significant penalties including fines to be paid to the cyclist for all damages incurred, plus rehab along with jail time. Then again this is just my $0.02 from the experiences that I have had and witnessed.

    Lets move on to a more positive topic.

  15. #15
    try driving your car less
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    in terms of cars and bikes, just be careful. i now carry a cell phone thanks to a tip from SSO, the virgin wireless pay as you go thing, since i never really use a cell phone for yakking. i have used it to call my wife when my bike is busted or i am feeling lazy or it's just pouring.
    if someone almost kills you, just pick up your phone. i have also written down license plate numbers. i have never actually submitted them to the cops, but people get very apologetic and nice when you pick up a cell phone and write down their license plate number.
    i still want to get one of those SUPER loud air horn things for onroad use.
    dont let cars ruin your ride, or your ability to eat solid foods and walk.
    you cant reason with rednecks.
    Only boring people get bored.

  16. #16
    ali'i hua
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    Quote Originally Posted by crux
    -snip- She yells back at me that all people on bikes belong on the sidewalk along with a few other obstinacies. -snip-
    I know that in the state of california, if you are over 18 it is illegal to be on the sidewalk on a bicycle.

    food for thought.

    sparty: is the BC planning wearing you out?

  17. #17
    Out spokin'
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    Quote Originally Posted by SlowSSer
    sparty: is the BC planning wearing you out?
    Evidently.

    --Sparty
    disciplesofdirt.org

    We don't quit riding because we get old.
    We get old because we quit riding.

  18. #18
    mtbr member
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    Well played

    Quote Originally Posted by Sparticus
    Arms still cocked in the ready-standby position, we stopped to look one another in the eye. I could tell that neither of us wanted to continue our endeavor at amateur boxing. A discussion ensued. Actually an argument at first, but then it calmed into a discussion. Eventually he actually listened to what I had to say about drivers who think they're better than cyclists. I listened to him complain about cyclists who ride four-abreast up his road and don't share the lane. I informed him that a lot of jerks ride bikes, but the guy he'd flipped off wasn't riding four-abreast -- I was riding alone and sharing the lane. I also pointed out that a lot of jerks drive automobiles -- and some of them give the finger to cyclists from the safety of their vehicles, even when it's undeserved.

    Fortunately we'd passed the point of hitting one another.

    He apologized. I apologized for starting a fight. He told me his name is George. I introduced myself. We shook hands. I picked my helmet visor up out of the middle of the road.
    I'm impressed... the willpower and levelheadedness it took to actually communicate like humans, instead of increasing his hatred of cyclists by administering a dose of pain in his own living room, is dang respectable.

    I'm sure there's a place for adrenaline-fueled fisticuffs, but what's cool about the outcome of your experience is that HE'S probably telling HIS redneck friends about YOU, and how you actually a) had a point, and b) listened to his concerns too. Only good can come from that. Very cool. Thanks for the story!
    -Porkchop

  19. #19
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    Sparty's got big balls!

    How do I know that? Well, I don't know personally but you've gotta have 'em if you're gonna stand up to a pick-up truck drivin, gun rack sporting, American flag sticker toting, mobile home living redneck while wearing lycra. Kudos to you Mr. Ambassador! I sure as heck woulda thunk all those things as I rode my bike past George's place of residence.

    I've never really gotten into fisticuffs, although I did stand up to a 'roid-raging punk ass who wanted to fight me for simply asking for the volleyball he stole from me during a flipnic (picnic involving numerous filipinos in celebration of Philippine Independence Day back home in Ottawa, although I'm sure a flipnic can describe pretty much any picnic attende by numerous filipinos, but I digress). I could see the rage in his eyes. He had the nerve to walk up to me, bump chests and say "Don't do it James!!!! Cuz I'll break you!!!" I stepped back, spread my arms wide open and told him "Go ahead... Break me." And that's when my wife came with a flying kick to his leg and before anything could happen, the "Breaking of James" was broken up by the other flipnickers. I believe to this day he still hates my guts for some lame reason. I'm more of a lover than a fighter, but if I have to, I will cuz no one is gonna ever break me! Never!

    Balls Sparty. Big F'in balls!!
    A good friend will come bail you out of jail.
    But a true friend will be sitting next to you saying
    "Damn... we fcuked up!"

  20. #20
    Retro Grouch
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    Smile I know what you were feeling; but...

    WHAT WERE YOU THINKING I’ve probably had more fights than Mike Tyson (fortunately most were just trying to get away from me). When I worked bicycle patrol in the local barrio, I never wasted my time trying to slug it out; I just took them down and hooked them up. Now when some goober honks their horn and celebrates our oneness with a hand gesture I just wave back like I don’t have a clue. Hopefully next time if you forget you’re old enough to know better (and I know you are) you'll have the thought that right now, unless I backoff, might be as good as I'm going to feel for a long time; as Rodney King once asked "Can't we all just get along ?" . Glad to hear you were not hurt and next time let cooler heads prevail.

    1G1G, Brad
    Last edited by aka brad; 03-29-2004 at 04:10 PM.

  21. #21
    Whiskey Tango Foxtrot
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    headline: COP QUOTES RODNEY KING!

    film at eleven.

    jus' keep riding that singlespeed along the high road, officer.

  22. #22
    Out spokin'
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    Quote Originally Posted by aka brad
    WHAT WERE YOU THINKING
    It's amazing.... people here at work have already heard about my weekend altercation. Everybody tells me what a crazy chance I took; how stupid it was.

    Yet now the women won't leave me alone.

    Don't worry, Brad. I feel no need to open another can o' whoop-ass on any unsuspecting rednecks. My rep is already solid, baby.

    --Sparty
    disciplesofdirt.org

    We don't quit riding because we get old.
    We get old because we quit riding.

  23. #23
    ali'i hua
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sparticus

    Yet now the women won't leave me alone.

    --Sparty
    AHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    now we see why sparty is throwing this around the office.
    Davey: you sneaky devil, you!

    damn. wish I would be at BC to hear this story around the campfire with too many beers in me. (snif)

  24. #24
    Harrumph
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    My turn

    I’ve got plenty of “auto-encounter” stories, but my favorite one was when I was riding my fixie so I’ll throw it in here. I was riding between classes this fall down the main road on campus. The road is really wide and has a huge bike lane, which I was riding in. I was in the lane, but hugging the line because of the sand/mud schlop left over from the first snow. Well, some Tool in a 3door cherry red Ford Focus decided I was taking up too much of the road. He lays on the horn, swerves at me-almost clipping me with a mirror(I’ve got a mirror story too), and screams "get the off the ___’ing road you ____’ing “British word for pile of sticks.”" I was having a rough day so I gave him the proper salute, and a few choice words. Apparently, what I said was the exact magic words to make a Tool in a Ford Focus lock up the brakes on a busy road and get out of the car without pulling over. I don’t exactly remember what he was saying, nothing intelligent just more random insults. I rode up to him, now standing in the middle of the road shouting at me. I didn’t really plan on arguing with him in the middle of the road while in a track stand(they’re easy on the fixie), but that is what ended up happening. I informed this moron that that on the other side of that 5in thick white line is a bike lane and that I happened to be riding a bike, in the bike lane. We went back and forth for a while, all while he is holding up traffic. I gave up and finished by telling him that I would not talk **** to a kindergarten girl from a pansy ass car like that and rode off, all without ever putting a foot down. I usually let this crap go but it was a rough day and I was hoping a cop would come by and take this idiot off the road. And to tie back in to this thread...if he'd taken a swing…I can’t say I would have walked away.

    Last edited by G-reg; 03-29-2004 at 05:57 PM.
    Slowly slipping to retrogrouchyness

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