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Thread: So...

  1. #1
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    So...

    these three senior citizens walk out into the street, first one says "boy its windy"
    second one says "no..it's Thursday" third one says "yeah, im thirsty too, lets get a beer"
    "foot to pedal, wheel to dirt, there is no substitute for the act of riding "

  2. #2
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    A guy on his way to the grocery store walks past a pool. A girl with no arms and legs is crying beside the pool. The guy being a kind person stops to see if there's something he can do to help. The girls says, "it's my 18th birthday and I've never been kissed before." So the man bends down and gives her a kiss. She says "thank you", all is well and so he leaves.
    On his way back the girl sees him coming again and so she begins to cry. The man says "what happened, thought it was that you had never been kissed", She says "yeah, and I've never been f@cked before neither." The man pauses, thinks to himself, no way I can't do that plus she's just trying to take advantage, so he throws her in the pool and says "there, now you're f@cked."
    Round and round we go

  3. #3
    STEEL IS REAL
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    What did one flag say to the other flag???

    Nothing, they just waved....
    life is... "All About Bikes"...

  4. #4
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    Why is Six afraid of Seven?
    Because Seven Eight Nine!

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by pursuiter View Post
    Why is Six afraid of Seven?
    Because Seven Eight Nine!
    I'm not sure whether I should:

    Or whether I should feel:
    life is... "All About Bikes"...

  6. #6
    heaven help me
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    Blind guy walks by the fish market and says..........

  7. #7
    AZ
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    A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you look so much like my late son." He answered, "That's okay." "I know it's silly, but if you'd call out 'Good bye, Mom' as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy." She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, "Goodbye, Mom." The little old lady waved and smiled back at him.

    Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone's day, he went to pay for his groceries. "That comes to $121.85," said the clerk.. "How come so much? I only bought 5 items." The clerk replied, "Yeah, but your Mother said you'd be paying for her things, too." Bet you thought this was going to be a real tear-jerker, but instead ... Don't trust Little Old Ladies!!

  8. #8
    heaven help me
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ.MTNS View Post
    A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you look so much like my late son." He answered, "That's okay." "I know it's silly, but if you'd call out 'Good bye, Mom' as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy." She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, "Goodbye, Mom." The little old lady waved and smiled back at him.

    Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone's day, he went to pay for his groceries. "That comes to $121.85," said the clerk.. "How come so much? I only bought 5 items." The clerk replied, "Yeah, but your Mother said you'd be paying for her things, too." Bet you thought this was going to be a real tear-jerker, but instead ... Don't trust Little Old Ladies!!

    Bravo!!

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ.MTNS View Post
    A young man shopping in a supermarket noticed a little old lady following him around. If he stopped, she stopped. Furthermore she kept staring at him. She finally overtook him at the checkout, and she turned to him and said, "I hope I haven't made you feel ill at ease; it's just that you look so much like my late son." He answered, "That's okay." "I know it's silly, but if you'd call out 'Good bye, Mom' as I leave the store, it would make me feel so happy." She then went through the checkout, and as she was on her way out of the store, the man called out, "Goodbye, Mom." The little old lady waved and smiled back at him.

    Pleased that he had brought a little sunshine into someone's day, he went to pay for his groceries. "That comes to $121.85," said the clerk.. "How come so much? I only bought 5 items." The clerk replied, "Yeah, but your Mother said you'd be paying for her things, too." Bet you thought this was going to be a real tear-jerker, but instead ... Don't trust Little Old Ladies!!
    Heard that one or one like it before. Old ladies are HOTTT!
    life is... "All About Bikes"...

  10. #10
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    Three legged dog walked into a bar and yelled "which one of you guys shot my paw"?

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by kerryp View Post
    Three legged dog walked into a bar and yelled "which one of you guys shot my paw"?

    Was his name Lucky.

  12. #12
    Give it a crank
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    Friends tell me alcohol kills brain cells.
    A drinking buddy says that won't happen if they're already dead.
    And another says alcohol flushes away the dead brain cells.
    We all agree alcohol is good for the brain and have another round.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mtn-Rider View Post
    Friends tell me alcohol kills brain cells.
    A drinking buddy says that won't happen if they're already dead.
    And another says alcohol flushes away the dead brain cells.
    We all agree alcohol is good for the brain and have another round.
    In one week, my buddies and I will be discussing very important issues like this on our annual houseboat trip with frosty, frothy, ice cold brews in hand. I'm pretty sure they'd all say, "I'll get drunk to that!".
    life is... "All About Bikes"...

  14. #14
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    As I'm driving to work this morning, the driver in front of me runs over a small rabbit.
    he quickly pulls to the side of the road and opens his trunk and pulls out an aerosol can
    and begins to spray the dead bunny..within minutes the rabbit gets up, shakes off and takes three hops, turns around and waives. he does this again and again and again until out of sight.
    The driver then tosses the aerosol can and gets back in his car and drives away. As I watch this in amazement
    I run over to the discarded can and pick it up. it reads: For hair restoration, and permanent waive!
    "foot to pedal, wheel to dirt, there is no substitute for the act of riding "

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by jkad View Post
    As I'm driving to work this morning, the driver in front of me runs over a small rabbit.
    he quickly pulls to the side of the road and opens his trunk and pulls out an aerosol can
    and begins to spray the dead bunny..within minutes the rabbit gets up, shakes off and takes three hops, turns around and waives. he does this again and again and again until out of sight.
    The driver then tosses the aerosol can and gets back in his car and drives away. As I watch this in amazement
    I run over to the discarded can and pick it up. it reads: For hair restoration, and permanent waive!
    The can should have been titled "Hare Do".
    life is... "All About Bikes"...

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