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  1. #1
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    Open marriage/relationship

    Who has one?
    How is it?

    oi :s I meant people, not bikes.
    Last edited by the-one1; 05-11-2012 at 09:18 AM.

  2. #2
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    I mainly ride my trance but sometimes I get bored and ride my 80's road bike around town to go have a beer or get some grub. The trance is understanding and knows she's my main squeeze. It's working out fine so far.

  3. #3
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    Folks who entertain such activities tend not to be those that you wish would be involved.

    My grandparents were fond of the swinging community back in the day, and I can't envision a it being a place I would visit. When I think of an open relationship, I now think of nasty, large, smelly individuals swarming with diseased genitalia and lots of hairy body parts.

    For you, I would suggest visiting Craigslist for your jollies. AZ Mountains may love the movement, but he probably lives far from your abode.
    You can't get a suntan on the moon...

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crankout View Post
    Folks who entertain such activities tend not to be those that you wish would be involved.

    My grandparents were fond of the swinging community back in the day, and I can't envision a it being a place I would visit. When I think of an open relationship, I now think of nasty, large, smelly individuals swarming with diseased genitalia and lots of hairy body parts.

    For you, I would suggest visiting Craigslist for your jollies. AZ Mountains may love the movement, but he probably lives far from your abode.
    Agreed. I was just being a jackass with ny response.

    I love being single and doing the occasional fling thing but if I actually put time and heart into a relationship with someone I wouldn't want to share then with anyone else. I recently broke up with my girl because she moved to another country with her family. I'm currently having a fling with a friend who just got out of a relationship herself. We are not dating and don't plan to date each other. Weve been friends for years and this just happened out of the blue. I don't care if she's seeing others and I'm certainly not just seeing her. I don't k.ow.if this is what you're talkig about but it sure is fun!

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by RockHillMtBiker View Post
    I used to have a GF whose parents were into that kind of thing. It was kind of odd that her dad was also a preacher.
    Y'all should have gotten naked and jumped in a pile. Then asked for forgiveness.

  6. #6
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    I used to have a GF whose parents were into that kind of thing. It was kind of odd that her dad was also a preacher.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by RockHillMtBiker View Post
    I used to have a GF whose parents were into that kind of thing. It was kind of odd that her dad was also a preacher.
    Y'all should have gotten naked and jumped in a pile. Then asked for forgiveness.

  8. #8
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    Im selfish. I dont share.
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  9. #9
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    I haven't ever engaged in this. I have known others who have. It didn't look like anything I'd ever be interested in and it didn't seem to work out too well for any of them either.
    I'm enjoying my childhood way too much to ever give it up.

  10. #10
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    In retrospect, I pretty much just explained "friends with benefits." My bad. No I have never been in an open relationship. I don't see it working for the normal person with a soul.

  11. #11
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    me no like buffets

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by knoob View Post
    I'll pretty much share anything,EXCEPT-my woman,socks,drawers,tooth brush or bar of soap.
    Use any of those and their yours to keep!

    Sent using BOTH my thumbs
    Don't forget deodorant! I will never share that and my friends look at me like I'm an asshat.

  13. #13
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    I'll pretty much share anything,EXCEPT-my woman,socks,drawers,tooth brush or bar of soap.
    Use any of those and their yours to keep!

    Sent using BOTH my thumbs

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by kikoraa View Post
    Don't forget deodorant! I will never share that and my friends look at me like I'm an asshat.
    Good catch, fogot that one.

    Sent using BOTH my thumbs

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crankout View Post
    Folks who entertain such activities tend not to be those that you wish would be involved.

    My grandparents were fond of the swinging community back in the day, and I can't envision a it being a place I would visit. When I think of an open relationship, I now think of nasty, large, smelly individuals swarming with diseased genitalia and lots of hairy body parts.

    For you, I would suggest visiting Craigslist for your jollies. AZ Mountains may love the movement, but he probably lives far from your abode.



    Please refrain from interjecting me into your sick, twisted fetish fantasies.

  16. #16
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    It was just brought to my attention that one of my married co-workers is in a swinging relationship, and I don't just mean on the playground with the kids. I manage/bartend in a tavern, and i was talking to my boss about one of my regular customers. I've seen this guy in there with his girlfriend several times, and she's very nice. but then i see him on his own, and he immediately "vultures" around any women that are there by themselves, and is seen later practically dry humping these women while the band plays on. Then the next week he's in again with his girlfriend. So I was talking to my boss about this, because frankly I just feel dirty - but then again, he and his girl could have an "open relationship". And my boss says, "oh, you mean like "bleeeep? (name of female married co-worker)". I was stunned. apparently I was the last to know. As usual. Then came the topic of discussion - how do you approach such an idea? The result could go very very well, yet devastatingly bad on the other end.

    Personally, I don't share. I know it's impolite, but damnit, what's mine is mine. Why do all the relationship work just to let someone else share in on the fun stuff?

    ---I also found out later that said "vulture-like" guy is also married, but his wife is in a coma and has been for a long time. Well now I feel like a ******.

  17. #17
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    ...and let it be known neither of my saddles want to be stuck up anyone else's arse.

  18. #18
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    Risky and sinful.

  19. #19
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    My goal in life is to simplify. Work, get paid, love my wife, eat, sleep, ride (in no particular order )

    Raise a family.

    No drama.

    I will never understand why people invite this sort of stuff into their lives, as if life isn't already full of BS. The only people I've ever known who engage in this sort of polyamorous, deviant, sexual behavior come from a background of dysfunction, once you start peeling back the layers you discover the fountain of problems and abuse they come from.

    Maybe some come from perfectly healthy upbringings and want to do this sort of stuff - the people I know who do this have deep issues.

    But, like an array of other things I don't care about, this falls into that category. In the end, I don't care what people do with their lives.

  20. #20
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    [QUOTE=Tystevens;9302749]I think that is the most interesting part of the whole arrangement. How do you bring it up seriously and not do any permanent damage? "So, honey, I was thinking ... "QUOTE]

    Getting drunk first probably helps.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by EllsEpiffer View Post
    Then came the topic of discussion - how do you approach such an idea? The result could go very very well, yet devastatingly bad on the other end.
    I think that is the most interesting part of the whole arrangement. How do you bring it up seriously and not do any permanent damage? "So, honey, I was thinking ... "

    I wonder about this when I hear about people swinging, or who get in a wierd spot like having a hook up with a relative, sister-in-law, something like that. You better be real sure before you broach the subject!

    When I used to tend bar (at a restaurant, so people came in to eat), this couple used to come in once a week or so and eat at the bar. Quite a bit older than me (probably mid-40's, I was about 23 at the time), but they were both pretty attractive people, she'd had a bit of enhancements done, and wasn't afraid to flaunt them. She, in particular, was very friendly, kinda flirty, although I thought I must be misunderstanding 'cuz her husband is right there. After about 5 or 6 weeks of them coming in once a week or so, they were in eating, and it was around closing time, they'd had several martinis. Her husband got up to go to the restroom, and I look over and her tank top is pulled down around her waist. I say "what are you doing" and "you can't do that here ...", freaked out a bit, thinking the husband is gonna go off on me. She pulls it up, her husband gets back and says to me, "so, are you coming over?", she kinda gave him a look and they both got up and left. Apparently she was supposed to make the invite, but when I freaked out, she didn't make it. They didn't come back to eat again ... Wierd lifestyle.
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  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by dion View Post
    my goal in life is to simplify. Work, get paid, love my wife, eat, sleep, ride (in no particular order )

    raise a family.

    No drama.

    I will never understand why people invite this sort of stuff into their lives, as if life isn't already full of bs. The only people i've ever known who engage in this sort of polyamorous, deviant, sexual behavior come from a background of dysfunction, once you start peeling back the layers you discover the fountain of problems and abuse they come from.

    Maybe some come from perfectly healthy upbringings and want to do this sort of stuff - the people i know who do this have deep issues.

    But, like an array of other things i don't care about, this falls into that category. In the end, i don't care what people do with their lives.
    ^^^^^^^this^^^^^^
    Last edited by DIRTJUNKIE; 05-11-2012 at 04:04 PM.
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  23. #23
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    Late to the party, but Dion said it perfectly.
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    I'm a product of this activity. August 1959 my parents went to NYC with a couple who used to live there. They swapped, Mom got pregnant with Don's seed. Don brought me up, never telling me this information. I then, at 49, found out why I never looked or had any of Don's characteristics. Mom was in love with Walter and Walter is my bio dad. Walter and wife moved far away in 1973.

    And yes, 10 years ago the wife suggested we try swapping for a change. We found out in about 6 months that it wasn't for us.

    We now follow Deon's philosophy.
    Listen to Deon.
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  25. #25
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    Why would one want to deal with more women in his life?

  26. #26
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    One woman is one more than can really deal with most of the time. Why on earth would I want more? Dion is dead on right.
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  27. #27
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    I know lots of people who do it.

    The, by FAR, most unhappy, jealous, dysfunctional, cheating, lying and generally hurtful people I know believe in monogamous relationships. Most people I know who are open, are generally much happier. Jealously is the worst human emotion, most people who are open about it have managed to look beyond jealousy, and are more trusting of their partners, and happier. The irony is that these situations tend to breed drastically less bs and drama. It eliminates one of the largest dramas any relationship ever deals with.

    Theres a HUGE difference between "why is my girlfriend out late and who is she with?" and knowing, securely, that shes on a date and she'll be coming back home to you. One eats you up, if you can learn to get over the second, its not even sort of an issue.

    In a monogamous relationship, if one partner gets bored.. they might look at other people and think "this person might be better than the one im with.. what am i missing?" and they might wander.. it happens extremely frequently. in an open setup, the person doesnt wonder what they're missing... they find out, and leave jealously and mystery behind. the other partner does too. Its fun, exciting, and you still go home to a solid, well built relationship.

    As it stands, 50% of marriages fail. Most relationships dont make it to marriage. Theres a whole massive amount of failed couplings going by the conventional method. There is very clearly a problem.. alternatives dont seem like such a longshot.

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by One Pivot View Post
    As it stands, 50% of marriages fail. Most relationships dont make it to marriage. Theres a whole massive amount of failed couplings going by the conventional method. There is very clearly a problem.. alternatives dont seem like such a longshot.
    Marriages fail because dysfunction makes people fail. It doesn't matter if they're monogamous or poly amorous, people who end up in a failed marriage shouldn't be married to begin with. I know this because I am on marriage #2. I had no business getting married in my mid-20's, and obviously my then-wife thought outside relationships were okay. She, too, had no business marriyng me.

    My marriage now is all about love, family, happiness and providing. None of my goals, or my wife's goals, are to seek affection/sex somewhere else. We are beyond that and we respect the vows. If somebody is not at that level to withhold those vows, then they shouldn't be married.

    It's okay if people sleep around, I just don't think that they should be in "relationships" with others. Stay single without attachment. And if people like to sleep around with the convenience of being "attached" - like I said - there's "daddy" or "mommy" issues somewhere there.

    I had buddies who would bang different chicks every weekend, but they didn't need a significant other. They were single. When it was time to settle down with one, they settled down with one and didn't go banging around. If they stepped outside of that, they had no business settling down.

  29. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by One Pivot View Post

    Theres a HUGE difference between "why is my girlfriend out late and who is she with?" and knowing, securely, that shes on a date and she'll be coming back home to you. One eats you up, if you can learn to get over the second, its not even sort of an issue.
    I don't think the thought of "my wifes on a date but she's coming home to me" could give me any kind of comfort or security. I guess that's just me.

  30. #30
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    Ive never been in an open relationship, honestly I dont know how id take it either. Ive been cheated on, and Ive dealt with and seen a whole rash of security/trust issues. Ive seen how poly people seem to handle it, and it seems to make more sense to me.

    How would you feel if suddenly your wife started going out, without you, and was coming home late at night? I dont think that would give you security either... for some reason that seems to happen a lot.

  31. #31
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    I'm lucky to have the one I've got. an "open" situation wouldn't work for me. especially if outside opportunities were unequally distributed, which they probably would be.

  32. #32
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    You here stuff like how Eskimos will offer their wife to a guest as I would a drink or a smoke. Hey, if you think of your wife as a commodity, even if you love that commodity, or if you would never deny your wife ANY pleasure, and can deal or don't care I guess that could work. Althou i've seen some situations better than others, have yet to see a happy ending in that type lifestyle.
    No kids? Hey do whatever you and your patner consent to but sometimes a fantasy is better left just that.
    Round and round we go

  33. #33
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    Wasn't Newt pushing this concept?

  34. #34
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    I don't get how people can make it work.

  35. #35
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    Because there is no commitment, it's a booty call with paperwork.
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  36. #36
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    One of my oldest friends has had an open relationship with his wife since before they were married. It works well for them and they are not from abusive parents etc. One of my GF's in college also used to bring her girlfriends home for me from time to time. She was a basket case which was cool when I was in my 20's, but not the lifestyle I want to live long term.

  37. #37
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    One of the couples that we do our Wednesday night bike ride with have a open relationship & it works for them, Most of the time they play together.

    Sure makes for some interesting chats on the bike ride.

    It does work for some but most people I guess just couldn't handle it.

    But you would need to be strong & have rules like nothing happens with out the other knowing.

    So each to there own as long as no one gets hurt.
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  38. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salespunk View Post
    One of my oldest friends has had an open relationship with his wife since before they were married. It works well for them and they are not from abusive parents etc. One of my GF's in college also used to bring her girlfriends home for me from time to time. She was a basket case which was cool when I was in my 20's, but not the lifestyle I want to live long term.
    The term 'open relationship' to me infers a marriage. Banging others when one has a GF seems less of a problem.

    That being said, you scored huge with a bi GF!!

    + 5 to you.
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  39. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ.MTNS View Post
    Please refrain from interjecting me into your sick, twisted fetish fantasies.
    Not my fantasy fella. Best check the OP on that one.

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  40. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crankout View Post
    Not my fantasy fella. Best check the OP on that one.

    Neg Rep for the Neg Rep.



    I did not neg. rep you, I'll be happy to do so however. Leave me out of your B.S.

  41. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dion View Post
    My marriage now is all about love, family, happiness and providing. None of my goals, or my wife's goals, are to seek affection/sex somewhere else. We are beyond that and we respect the vows. If somebody is not at that level to withhold those vows, then they shouldn't be married.
    I 100% agree with this. I'm not religious in the least, but getting up in front of everyone I care about and vowing myself to the one I love IS religion to me, and very sacred. I am 30 years old and never married. I've had a few long lasting relationships, but no marriages. I am currently involved in an almost 4 year relationship with someone I love very deeply, and wish to marry someday. Do i want him to propose? Hell yes. Will I force him too? Feck NO. I know he's thinking along the same lines as me, but I'm not about to force him into something he's not ready for - that's just a recipe for disaster. I have so many girl friends that pressure their guys to marry them, Then they do. Then they divorce because they weren't ready. You should never have to force it. It's not a decision that should be taken lightly, and neither are the vows.

    Now that that tangent is done, I found out shortly after my mother passed (when I was 16) that my parents were swingers for a while. I'm not sure when - if they were married, was my brother born yet (he's 5 years older) or was i alive too? My dad was very vague, thank god, because ya know, this is what every 16 year old girl wants to learn when she's grieving the death of her mother. He said she was the one who put a stop to it, and he'd been fine with that decision. I do know that she was the love of his life, and were she still alive they would never have divorced. It seemed like more something they just tried for awhile, and moved on.

    This is a tough subject because everyone and every relationship is different, so it's hard to judge the ones that decide to swing so harshly. there are monogamous relationships that don't work, and there are polygamous relationships that suck too. I'm not saying I'm for it, but that it's not for me. But hey, if someone else can make it work - like my friend, who is happily married with two children, then what do I care. As long as they don't try to invite me in on it, I'm cool

  42. #42
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    Def not for me, but if others want to do that, have at it. As long as they are being safe and not spreading around the herpes lol.

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    It's good for some and not so good for others. If you have any kind of jealousy issue then don't start. If you only think dysfunctional people are involved then you're misinformed. Don't judge people because of it, you never know who in your circle is involved. And you won't know until they tell you.

  44. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brewtality View Post
    One woman is one more than can really deal with most of the time. Why on earth would I want more? Dion is dead on right.
    It's like wanting two headaches.
    In an open relationship someone always looses their turn. More often than not someone ends up sad.

  45. #45
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    This should be an indication of whether you've failed in life. If you're in a position where you are surrounded by individuals who are willing or eager to take part in an open relationship you need to look back to every decision that lead you to that point and backtrack as fast as you can. If I asked my gf to be in an open relationship she would be gone before the word 'relationship' left my mouth. And if she wasn't I would leave her.
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  46. #46
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    I wont even let other people ride my bikes. My girl is definitely off limits.
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  47. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by nikojan View Post
    This should be an indication of whether you've failed in life. If you're in a position where you are surrounded by individuals who are willing or eager to take part in an open relationship you need to look back to every decision that lead you to that point and backtrack as fast as you can. If I asked my gf to be in an open relationship she would be gone before the word 'relationship' left my mouth. And if she wasn't I would leave her.
    So being surrounded by divorced/broken up people makes any more sense?

    Most people are cheaters, or know cheaters. Its so incredibly prevalent... i dont see how you can wag your finger at two people who do the same thing without the level of hurt and deception involved.

    To tell you the truth.. if i had such a narrow and judgmental view of others as you do, id probably feel that i failed in life. I understand fully people who say its not for them without judging.

  48. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by One Pivot View Post
    So being surrounded by divorced/broken up people makes any more sense?

    Most people are cheaters, or know cheaters. Its so incredibly prevalent... i dont see how you can wag your finger at two people who do the same thing without the level of hurt and deception involved.

    To tell you the truth.. if i had such a narrow and judgmental view of others as you do, id probably feel that i failed in life. I understand fully people who say its not for them without judging.
    I agree, Sadly I know of couples that are not in a open relationship that seem to sleep around alot more than couples that are in a open relation ship

    Just because someone is in a open relationship doesn't mean that they are out sleeping around all the time, ( In somecases Yes ) But in alot of cases it's more of if it happens it happens.

    I have meet a couple ( customers actually ) that are quite open about the fact that she really likes sex & he just isn't into it & he says Life is short & I love my wife & that we match in every other way so why not let her have what she wants.

    I can't say I have seen to many couples that get on as well as these to do.

    So yes I do agree that for some / most it would be a ticking time bomb , But for some others it can be a foundation to build a great life together.

    As for me I just wish more people could find away to get on together better, Life is short, Get on & don't hurt anybody What ever that may take or mean
    I have a 6 Berth & 2 Berth Motorhomes that I rent out . They are based in Tauranga, New Zealand

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    I've had several friends over the years that have supposedly been in "open" relationships....


    They have ALL ended badly.... Very Badly...

  50. #50
    ballbuster
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    I dunno...

    I say if you're honest about your relationship(s) with everybody, and if that sorta thing works for you (all), and that's what you really want, go for it.

    Sin? The only real sin is being dishonest, and breaking your promises. It all depends on what you have worked out.

    I know folks in open relationships that work. They know the real love is at home, even if the creative recreation happens elsewhere.

    Me? ... it wouldn't work for me so I wouldn't do it. I got everything I need at home. Back in the day before I went 'Pro', I had a couple FWB relationships. I had needs, and so did they, but we knew a 'real' relationship would not work well for us.

    Diseases... now come on. That is just a scare tactic. We all know about the safe sexytime.

  51. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by One Pivot View Post
    So being surrounded by divorced/broken up people makes any more sense?

    Most people are cheaters, or know cheaters. Its so incredibly prevalent... i dont see how you can wag your finger at two people who do the same thing without the level of hurt and deception involved.

    To tell you the truth.. if i had such a narrow and judgmental view of others as you do, id probably feel that i failed in life. I understand fully people who say its not for them without judging.
    What are you talking about? Thats makes absolutely no sense. Heres your logic: Everyone in an open relationship is happy with their situation; everyone else is miserable and divorced. Most people are cheaters?...what?! Where are you getting these facts from? Your entire viewpoint is based on inaccuracies; that most people are cheaters, that anyone not in an open relationship is just lying to their partner, that being in an open relationship is anything different then cheating without the label.

    You're assuming that I've 'failed in life' because im judgemental....
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  52. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by muzzanic View Post
    I have meet a couple ( customers actually ) that are quite open about the fact that she really likes sex & he just isn't into it & he says Life is short & I love my wife & that we match in every other way so why not let her have what she wants.
    Thats complete BS. Theres no way a man can be alright with his wife having sex with another man. Open relationship or not. Period. Its one thing to say it and a completely other thing to actually feel it. What the hell is the point of getting married at that point? Thats not a marriage, thats called being friends with benefits.
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  53. #53
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    Whether or not you're a failure in life should be completely up to you since lotsa people will judge you and again, it's up to you whether you care what they think or not. Everyone has a unique thought process, set of beliefs, and standards that's a combo of what you were born with and what you've experienced in life. Trying to make someone believe as you do because you believe it's better is no better than a swinger or gay person trying to convince you that you're wrong.
    Judge not, live and let live.
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  54. #54
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    Maybe I'm weird, but if I ever met another male who said they "just werent into sex" id probably advise them to get checked out. Im not a sex addict by any means but its a very important part of my marriage to me and my wife and Im not sure where our relationship would be without it.
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  55. #55
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    I think an open relationship makes sense for some and I'd entertain the idea. When you get down to it, we're animals and creatures of instinct. Propagating the species is--on its most basic level--an instinctual habit. Do some species have life long monogomous relationships? Sure. Do some have vehemently homosexual relationships that are monogomous and life long? Sure. Do some have life long "open" relationships designed to hit the ceiling of maximum habitat support for their species? Yeah. If your way of life works for you, do it to the fullest. Just because you're in an open relationship doesn't mean you're out all the time trying to get laid. You have an emotional attatchment to someone and sex with them is awesome on one level but if the need/urge/want arises where you sleep with another person then so be it. There's no emotional attachment to that "connect" it was just an indulgence in physical desire. If you're not okay with that in a relationship then an open one is not for you. I am well aware of the social construct of a monogomous life long relationship and as such I know when I am dating someone this is what is typically accepted. I don't try to force my ideology on folks so I take the monogamy route. I think you can have a very healthy emotional connection with one person while having other partners. However, emotional cheating is nigh cause for disbanding the relationship.
    Last edited by monzie; 05-16-2012 at 11:57 AM.

  56. #56
    Carbon & Ti rule
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    Quote Originally Posted by nikojan View Post
    Thats complete BS. Theres no way a man can be alright with his wife having sex with another man. Open relationship or not. Period. Its one thing to say it and a completely other thing to actually feel it. What the hell is the point of getting married at that point? Thats not a marriage, thats called being friends with benefits.
    Marrage is not just about sex,Marrage is so many things to so many people but to say that everybody plays by the same rules is a little silly.

    I know a guy that just would never ever cheat on his wife ever but treats her like crap & belittles her in front of every one & is just an A$$ so there is so many was to hurt someone, He has crushed this poor ladys spirt & beleaves he is a top guy because he would never sleep around,

    I'm not saying that an open marrage is a good thing as such, But having common ground & working together to make ones life together more fun. Well more power to them I say.

    But clearly you would need to know if you could handle it or not.

    I respect your opinion & it is good to see that you know how you feel about it, but for some it is not so black & white.
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  57. #57
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    Wow. This is more polarizing than the gay/lesbian poser thread.

  58. #58
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    Every marriage requires work. A lot of work. Anyone that tells you their marriage is perfect and they never have to work at it is either extremely lucky or extremely in denial.

    If 2 people are forward in their understanding of the rules of an open marriage and it isn't something that one is doing to make the other happy (which I bet is the case in most that end badly) then I suspect they will function just like any other successful marriage.

    Communication issues, or lack thereof, is what kills marriages. When everything is discussed with complete honesty as a goal people don't get hurt. However that is the hardest thing to do and why marriages do require so much work. Once the honesty gets veiled or the communication is fake the marriage isn't working so well.

    I don't doubt there are marriages that work when open, I don't doubt that there are polygamous marriages that work, I don't doubt that most things work, but as most goes against the dominant paradigm of whatever era you are in, they are the extreme minority just like anything else.
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  59. #59
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    In our case it was the wifes idea...and hers to stop. We found out just how lucky we were to have each other. She would have not taken it kindly if I came up with the idea though. Funny how the rules are different. We just celebrated 25 year anniversary today btw, together for 35.
    lean forward

  60. #60
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    The only chance of me entertaining the notion is if my wife presented me the option with another hot female. However, I would not approve thw wife of shagging another fellow.

    That being said, it would simply be strange in our home after the act was committed.

    So, does OPEN RELATIONSHIP pertain only to those in a marriage? I am under the impress 'yes.'
    You can't get a suntan on the moon...

  61. #61
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    Nah, an open relationship is just that. Be it between married people or just life partners.

    Edit: I forgot my legalese. It's between two consenting adult partners, regardless of federal marital status.

  62. #62
    derp
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    I don't see open relationships any different than other "fetishes" tbh ... If they like it, who am i to judge ?
    Not really my cup of tea but whatever rocks your boat.

  63. #63
    VENI VEDI BIKI
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    Way too much work for what is at stake if you mess it up IMHO.

    My wife once jokingly asked me if I was cheating. I told her I was too lazy to cheat. My same feelings on "open relationships." I guess if you are in your 20s and still get a kick from running around with strange every weekend, best of luck to you. However, by the time you reach your 30s and 40s, you just want to come home, go for a bike ride, drink a beer, do some yardwork, and fall asleep on your couch with your hands in your belt like Al Bundy.

    As the previous poster said, unncessary drama. The only people I know with such relationships were college "friends with benefits" who never stayed together, or a few married couples where one spouse was openly having an affair and the other wouldn't leave.

    I like simplicity, same as riding a singlespeed. I picked my gear, got married, and am sticking with it for the full course, even when it gets difficult and I have to get off and walk, and even when I get bored spinning on the flats. I'd rather deal with that than than constantly worrying about bashing my derailuer on harmful objects, getting gunk in my hanger, and having my chain fall off.
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  64. #64
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    I don't share, but there should be some sort of man law that if you don't get it in like 3 weeks then its open season haha.

  65. #65
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    Quote Originally Posted by skankingbiker View Post
    ... harmful objects, getting gunk in my hanger, and having my chain fall off.
    This is a great mediphor for what can happen if you "ride too many strange trails". I'll stick with my single speed too.
    Last edited by SS Hack; 05-19-2012 at 03:01 PM.

  66. #66
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    okay - i am new to the forums in general and I keep getting negative reps in this thread, and I just don't get it. I got a couple quotes:

    "Your post made me sick. Please keep those weird fetish for yourself. And who's got the clap ? You got the clap !"

    and "go eat some aids"

    WTF? Really? What about my post was sickening? I merely posted about some open relationship I had known about, but said it's not for me. Soo, how do i have the clap? Is monogamy my sick fetish? Am I getting the clap and all the delicious aids I'm going to eat from my 4 year relationship with my one and only?

    Anybody else just get random threatening messages and bogus neg reps from other users for no apparent reason? Did I enter a high school forum?

    I thought we were all adults sharing our opinions about a topic. I'm not hating or loving on anyone, and am not saying anything that should warrant this reaction.

    Did I miss something?

    I so confused....

  67. #67
    ******
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    I get them all the time. I choose to ignore it. It's largely unimportant anyway. It's the Internet, ignoring a large part of it is a good start to not getting worked up about inane crap.

  68. #68
    Bro Mountainbiker
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    Who here has the clap? **** sucks!
    Raised in a Chicken-Coop by Chickens

  69. #69
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sheepo5669 View Post
    Who here has the clap? **** sucks!
    Sounds like a new thread/poll.
    Make sure there is a poll option for those of us with the herpa-ghona-syphl-aids super VD. That one really sucks to get rid of.
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  70. #70
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    ^^^I believe you mean Gonoherpasyphilaids. If I could link this would be linked to YouTube of NOFX's song of the same name. I have all of them. I like the clap most cuz it reminds me of all my fans.

  71. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by monzie View Post
    ^^^I believe you mean Gonoherpasyphilaids. If I could link this would be linked to YouTube of NOFX's song of the same name. I have all of them. I like the clap most cuz it reminds me of all my fans.
    No, I have the herpaghonasyphlaids variant. Nasty stuff.
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  72. #72
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    ^^ Hey, apparently i have the clap, but s'alright, I can cure it with a big ol plate full of aids. Thanks guys. I also got a direct message from a user that was pretty "interesting". I guess that's where the block list comes in handy. And here I was thinkin the roadies were the snobby types. (kidding!)

  73. #73
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    Obviously that's different for everyone.
    Last edited by Alexander Ivashkin; 06-04-2012 at 04:09 AM.

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