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  1. #1
    EAT MORE GRIME
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    I'm messed up in the head...

    seriously, i wish I was stinking rich beyond belief, I'd hook so many people up


    so, I was in wallyworld just shopping for whatever I needed...I think dish soap an toothpaste, then was checking out wallyworld bikes...and other parts of the store.

    near the bikes was a little girl and her mom, and the kid was begging for a bike and the mom whispering no we can't get that....

    so i am standing there a few feet away knowing I ain't rich but have an OK job and I could buy a wallyworld bike and just give it to them... i could easily just give them a bike

    but I did nothing and ya know I don't want to bother people...in fact I went back to my car and sorted wept a bit about it. I mean what the F man why does this bug me... if I was rich I'd give everyone a bike

    anyhow...I'm screwed up i guess
    "Put your seatbelt back on or get out and sit in the middle of that circle of death." - Johnny Scoot

  2. #2
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    How much is the bike?

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  3. #3
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    well like a kids bike, what, 250-300 bucks.

    all I'm saying is it affects me to hear a kid not able to get a bike

    I don't know the circumstances....it reminds me of being a kid and bikeless and my mom dug real hard to keep me and my sisters on wheels my whole kid life...
    "Put your seatbelt back on or get out and sit in the middle of that circle of death." - Johnny Scoot

  4. #4
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    I feel like this when I see normal-looking people, then they open their mouth and have teeth missing in really obvious places and I'm thinking, man, if I were a dentist, I'd probably go broke because I'd be telling these folks to visit my practice and I'd fix them up for free.

    Saw a woman working in an auto parts store the other day- maybe 35 or 40. Kinda cute, then she started talking and her upper front teeth were either missing or effed up. She didn't look like a crankster, so I really felt bad for her.

    You're a good man for wanting to help that kid get a bike. Maybe you could have told mom that you'd look around on CL or something to see if you could find a cheap fixer-upper. Hell, it would be better than a Wally World bike.

    If you were stinking rich, you probably wouldn't have been in Wally World anyways.
    Last edited by Finch Platte; 04-27-2020 at 06:20 PM. Reason: Truck fump!

  5. #5
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    Boy.

    Reading this really makes me feel good......

    You guys made the World a better place today.
    Freedom is a shield against the negative consequences of the Foolishness of others.



  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by 127.0.0.1 View Post
    ....all I'm saying is it affects me to hear a kid not able to get a bike........I don't know the circumstances....it reminds me of being a kid and bikeless and my mom dug real hard to keep me and my sisters on wheels my whole kid life...
    I never see compassion as a weakness or "screwed up". In fact it makes me grateful that those feelings still exist in mankind at large, especially during the current state of affairs.
    Bicycles don't have motors.

  7. #7
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    Feelings.
    That’s the important part.
    Freedom is a shield against the negative consequences of the Foolishness of others.



  8. #8
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    You're alright 127. It's normal for people to want to help other people. The tough thing in that moment is facing the possibility of truly offending a proud, hard working person that's doing their best.

    Maybe the right play here is to reach out to the nearest bike co-op and see what you can do at that level.
    Well my days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle.

  9. #9
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    You can still help. maybe not the specific kid, but another one
    https://www.bicycling.com/news/g2001...donate-a-bike/
    grab a used bike and donate it.

  10. #10
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    Bikes for Kids on Bacon's link, https://fb4k.org/ says they have expanded to 12 markets now. My company gives us a couple of days off a year to donate our time to a charity. I was setting up with them for myself and a couple of coworkers to help them out before Christmas but then I had my accident and wasn't able to. But I'll have to get back on that once we can go about that type of interaction.
    This post is a natural product. Variances in spelling & grammar should be appreciated as part of its character & beauty.

  11. #11
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    I’d like a new Banshee Titan.
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  12. #12
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    Lots of towns and cities have programs that fix up kids and adult bikes alike for donating to the less fortunate. Get involved if you can, even if just for a single build. Beats supporting the monster who's success is dependent on the disenfranchised anyway.

    I often wonder how many people around me have those "empathy triggers" as well. When I find someone that genuinely does I'm instantly attracted to them. What I hate is people that do all the virtual signalling verbally but just don't get it in reality. Adult children.

    My empathy triggers with people are too weird to try & articulate here but I absolutely love animals and always have. In a perfect world I could integrate the healing of broken animals and broken people into a living.

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  13. #13
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    There are places out there that donate childrens bicycles to families in need.
    Churches might help.
    Thrift Stores might help.
    Posting ads for needy families.
    Community Centers
    Community bicycle co-ops
    Local bicycle stores
    of course the list goes on, you just have to think outside your wallet.

    There is way more you can do then just dropping a wad of cash on a new item.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by 127.0.0.1 View Post
    seriously, i wish I was stinking rich beyond belief, I'd hook so many people up


    so, I was in wallyworld just shopping for whatever I needed...I think dish soap an toothpaste, then was checking out wallyworld bikes...and other parts of the store.

    near the bikes was a little girl and her mom, and the kid was begging for a bike and the mom whispering no we can't get that....

    so i am standing there a few feet away knowing I ain't rich but have an OK job and I could buy a wallyworld bike and just give it to them... i could easily just give them a bike

    but I did nothing and ya know I don't want to bother people...in fact I went back to my car and sorted wept a bit about it. I mean what the F man why does this bug me... if I was rich I'd give everyone a bike

    anyhow...I'm screwed up i guess
    You are not screwed up, and if you are then so am i because I see people less fortunate than myself every day. Sometimes I try to help if I can, other days I just have to remind myself to be thankful for what I have.

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  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by 127.0.0.1 View Post
    well like a kids bike, what, 250-300 bucks.

    all I'm saying is it affects me to hear a kid not able to get a bike

    I don't know the circumstances....it reminds me of being a kid and bikeless and my mom dug real hard to keep me and my sisters on wheels my whole kid life...
    I'm with ya. It's nice to just act on the impulse when you have the opportunity. Haven't done it recently, but maybe there's an opportunity just around the bend.

    edit: Similarly, a year or so ago, my wife and I were out for the evening and while at a restaurant, we noticed a young couple on what appeared to be a first date. It looked a little awkward, so we decided to give them something to talk about later. They went to pay for their dinner and found it had been taken care of. That was fun and they were clueless.
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  16. #16
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    127, this is a natural feeling for anyone with a heart and emotions. Problem is, a huge percent of the filthy rich have become hardened to these emotions due to greed. Their greed keeps them from opening their heart to pay it forward.
    Quote Originally Posted by mileslong View Post
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  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Finch Platte View Post
    If you were sinking rich, you probably wouldn't have been in Wally World anyways.
    Some of the richest people I know are cheap bastards.

    Growing up we did not have a lot of money. Later in life I learned about what my parents did for me and my sister growing up to have what we have now. I would give that to another any time. Sometimes it is the simplest things to make someone's day.

    There is a subway at the gas station by my house off the hwy. Usual Saturday lunch. There was a father and daughter infront of me, they were going to split a 6in for lunch. She wanted a cookie and toy, he didn't have enough cash for a sandwich and kids meal. I told the cashier I have a coupon for a free footlong and a kids meal. I gave him a generic coupon and $20. I know the cashier and I got the nod. I know it's not buying a kid a bike but they were so happy. I got the silent thank you from the father while the girl ate her cookie and played with the toy.

    It does not take much to make the world a little better.

  18. #18
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    I agree in part with you, DJ,
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    127, this is a natural feeling for anyone with a heart and emotions. Problem is, a huge percent of the filthy rich have become hardened to these emotions due to greed. Their greed keeps them from opening their heart to pay it forward.
    I agree in part with you, DJ, but I'd also have to say that the very well off are extremely fearful of the lesser among them, and the trend a year ago was to rail about the 'envy' of their wealth that festered in the hearts of the workers and servants who they employed. Greed and fear fill the void in that kind, but compassion leaves a mighty big hole to fill.
    Just call me Ray

  19. #19
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    Good thread.

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    Those situations are tricky. There's the risk of interfering with someone's parenting decisions, and also the risk of offending someone who, though poor, is proud not to have to accept charity.

    As others have suggested, there are many ways to help people in need generically (e.g. donate to food kitchens), or more personally. I've bought and sold a lot of bikes (guitars, furniture, etc) on craigslist, and there have been several times when I ended up giving the item to someone who is worthy. Several times I've also let people bargain me down severely, while still letting them pay--there's a pride issue sometimes. I once gave a recovering drug addict a BMX bike (that I had bought for $50 I think, so I didn't exactly have to dig deep)--he was so grateful--he remembered how much riding BMX had meant to him before he had gotten addicted. These are a lot more satisfying than writing a check.

    On a somewhat political note--there's no shortage of wealth in the US, and no shortage of hard working people who are one paycheck away from ruin (especially now). Is it really a solution to wish that the extremely wealthy were more generous? The taxation system, and overall distribution of wealth, was far fairer in the 1950s than now-and last I checked, Eisenhower was not considered a commie, and the 1950s were considered a time of prosperity with a healthy middle class (different story for racial minorities, however).

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by paramount3 View Post
    Those situations are tricky. There's the risk of interfering with someone's parenting decisions, and also the risk of offending someone who, though poor, is proud not to have to accept charity.

    As others have suggested, there are many ways to help people in need generically (e.g. donate to food kitchens), or more personally. I've bought and sold a lot of bikes (guitars, furniture, etc) on craigslist, and there have been several times when I ended up giving the item to someone who is worthy. Several times I've also let people bargain me down severely, while still letting them pay--there's a pride issue sometimes. I once gave a recovering drug addict a BMX bike (that I had bought for $50 I think, so I didn't exactly have to dig deep)--he was so grateful--he remembered how much riding BMX had meant to him before he had gotten addicted. These are a lot more satisfying than writing a check.

    On a somewhat political note--there's no shortage of wealth in the US, and no shortage of hard working people who are one paycheck away from ruin (especially now). Is it really a solution to wish that the extremely wealthy were more generous? The taxation system, and overall distribution of wealth, was far fairer in the 1950s than now-and last I checked, Eisenhower was not considered a commie, and the 1950s were considered a time of prosperity with a healthy middle class (different story for racial minorities, however).
    General Eisenhower was never accused, even by up and coming Sen. Joe McCarthy, of any commie-coddling. Anyone not familiar with it should listen to the warnings he gives in his Farewell Speech. He especially points to the increasingly wealthy and powerful "Military-Industrial Complex" as a danger to future democracy.
    If only he could see us now.
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  22. #22
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  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    127, this is a natural feeling for anyone with a heart and emotions. Problem is, a huge percent of the filthy rich have become hardened to these emotions due to greed. Their greed keeps them from opening their heart to pay it forward.
    That may well be true.
    There is another factor though.
    Many times efforts are wasted on the wrong people. I have seen it many, many times. Ingratitude, grumbling, and downright nastiness can have a destructive effect upon the kind hearted. Sometimes it’s hard not to become a cynical, jaded asshole, not from greed but from frustration. Most good, successful charities well know this and have strict protocols to control distribution of resources.

    There is still no substitute for learning how to genuinely love your neighbor as yourself.

    It isn’t the grand, public sensational acts that make the difference. It’s the small, private, anonymous, consistent efforts as mentioned by some above that really make the world a better place. Because it isn’t really the money or material (though they are at times necessary and practical) that lasts in the other person so much as the Spirit in them it engenders. That is lasting, positive effect and always worth the effort.

    Private American generosity is probably the greatest bulwark against statist socialism.
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  24. #24
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    This thread resonates with me. All my life I’ve wanted to help people out. In fact, every time a friend of mine was moving I would help them (they never offered when I had to move though!), every time a friend needed help fixing their car, I was over there with tools helping them out, every time someone had a computer problem I was helping them sort it out – just to name a few scenarios. A couple years in a row in the mid-2000s I volunteered for at the local Emergency Housing Consortium for a Thanksgiving feast for the homeless (eight hours on my feet in an industrial kitchen) and my extended family (rich white entitled conservatives) would give me a hard time about helping out the less fortunate. So, if tomorrow by some off-chance I won a million dollars, I would first pay off my divorce-induced debt, then factor taxes taken out, and then split the remainder in two; 1/2 I would donate to charities helping out the less fortunate (doing my research to make sure these aren’t the “whoops where did the money go” crooks), and then finally put some money into my 401K/SEP/IRAs for retirement since I will only have $40,000.00 for retirement at this point.
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  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by azimiut View Post
    Some of the richest people I know are cheap bastards.
    Same here. Most of them aren’t truly happy people deep down inside though, as beyond money and material belongings they really have nothing to show for themselves.
    Don’t frail and blow if you’re going to Braille and Flow.

  26. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    127, this is a natural feeling for anyone with a heart and emotions. Problem is, a huge percent of the filthy rich have become hardened to these emotions due to greed. Their greed keeps them from opening their heart to pay it forward.
    Its actually the middle class that is not donating

    An interesting pattern emerges if one studies giving by income level. As incomes rise, more and more of the people in that bracket make gifts to charity. The sizes of their gifts tend to rise as well. However: if you look at average donations as a fraction of funds available, they tend to level off at around 2-3 percent of income.
    The exception to this pattern comes at the bottom of the income spectrum. Low-income households are the only ones in America where a majority do not give money to charity. Among the minority of poor who do give, however, a significant number are sacrificial donors—sharing double-digit portions of their incomes.



    https://www.philanthropyroundtable.o....s.-generosity

  27. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bacon Fat View Post
    Its actually the middle class that is not donating

    An interesting pattern emerges if one studies giving by income level. As incomes rise, more and more of the people in that bracket make gifts to charity. The sizes of their gifts tend to rise as well. However: if you look at average donations as a fraction of funds available, they tend to level off at around 2-3 percent of income.
    The exception to this pattern comes at the bottom of the income spectrum. Low-income households are the only ones in America where a majority do not give money to charity. Among the minority of poor who do give, however, a significant number are sacrificial donors—sharing double-digit portions of their incomes.



    https://www.philanthropyroundtable.o....s.-generosity
    I wonder how much taxes figure into the rich charitable calculus.

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  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by WHALENARD View Post
    I wonder how much taxes figure into the rich charitable calculus.

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    https://www.marketwatch.com/story/ho...ity-2018-11-27

    Most — 93% — said they give because they believe their gift can make a difference. “Tax benefits are really not a primary motivation for giving,” said Gillian Howell, managing director of U.S. Trust’s philanthropic solutions group. “They’re giving much more for altruistic reasons.”

    But really, who is going to say its just for tax reasons.

  29. #29
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    Console yourself with the thought that just giving kids what they want is not good for them.

    We used to deliberately take our kids into toy shops but not buy them anything. They grew up with that and as a result were never demanding. If they wanted a new bike they had to pay for at least part of it themselves out of their savings.

    When my son was in his mid-teens he asked for an expensive pair of trainers. I said 'That's much more than I'd pay for a pair of trainers for myself but I'll tell you what. I'll give you 'X' towards them and you can pay the (relatively small) rest yourself? He had the money, he didn't buy the trainers!

    Which kids grow up with a better grasp of the value of things. The kids that just get handed what they want or the kids that do without or work for what they get? You did the kid a favour.

  30. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by WHALENARD View Post
    I wonder how much taxes figure into the rich charitable calculus.

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    See how that cynicism works.....
    both ways.
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    Quote Originally Posted by WHALENARD View Post
    I wonder how much taxes figure into the rich charitable calculus.

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    There is no calculus into the decision to make a charitable contribution to gain a tax advantage. Those days are long gone. If you pay out to a charity, you are out the amount of the donation. If you keep it and are taxed on the difference in your income, it won't be taxed at 100% and you'll come out ahead.

  32. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bacon Fat View Post
    Its actually the middle class that is not donating

    Low-income households are the only ones in America where a majority do not give money to charity.
    America; where low income households are now considered middle class.




    I agree with Mr Pig that sometimes not having something can be more of a valuable lesson, certainly far more valuable than always getting what you want, but obviously there's a happy middle ground there. Hard to know where the scenario in the first post fits, who knows if the kid had their own bike at home and just wanted something new because it was better, or if they genuinely couldn't afford any bike for the kid who desperately wanted one. Either way, OP you're a good human for feeling compassion.

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    You say $200-$350 for a new kids bicycle.
    Buy it used instead, not only are you recycling and saving space in the land fill, but it would cost a lot cheaper too.

    In the aisle at Walmart, flip open the wallet for a quick 5 minutes of your time
    Actually look for a charity to help out, 30 minutes of your time.
    Go out and buy a used bicycle, tune it up, a lot more then 30 minutes of your time.

  34. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by OzarkFathom View Post
    See how that cynicism works.....
    both ways.
    I'ma keep my glass full kind of guy.

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    Just bear in mind kids ask for stuff all they time. They will go into the isle and want a scooter and an xbox and a trampoline and a basket ball and a tv and and and and.......

    Just because the parents aren't buying the kids something doesnt mean that they don't have it or the parents don't have a plan to give them the bike for birthday.

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    Quote Originally Posted by OzarkFathom View Post
    .......Many times efforts are wasted on the wrong people.....
    So kindness is wasted on people less fortunate than you?

    You should stop hiding behind your fancy arguments and admit that you are a hypocritical, bigoted, hateful and scared little man.
    Bicycles don't have motors.

  37. #37
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    I think it's normal to want to help people. A bike is also something different than a toy, it's like opening the world to a whole new type of mobility for those who don't drive (by age, hand of law, choice, etc). I remember when I turned 16 my mom got my twin brother and me bikes that were nicer bikes than we had before. They were hybrid bikes, good for biking on rail trails and commuting around town. We rode the absolute hell out of those bikes, just because we could. I suppose that's when bicycling really took hold in my life. Anywho, when I got my first mountain bike, I was also commuting to college, and decided I'd donate my hybrid bike, because the shop I got the new one from would fix it up and donate it to someone who needed one to get to work and couldn't afford a new one. That's what the owner did and he and I are still good friends to this day.

    So yeah, a bicycle might not be necessary for a little girl, but bicycling for some is not just exercise, but somewhat transcendent. I suppose one way to approach that situation lightly would be to say something like "I heard she said she wanted a bike, and I've got one in my garage that I've been trying to get rid of. I just need to fix it up and I'd gladly give it to you". Just make it seem like a favor to be rid of it. Something like that, and then maybe you have to get one off CL for $50. I agree that it's tricky, because you don't want to hurt anyone's pride, especially when their kid simply asking for something may have unintentionally done so already by being in such a public setting.

    But, yeah, charity feels good, when you can swing it. I figure once I've paid off my student loans, I'd like to start donating regularly, but purposefully (not that I really can't now, but saving money is a priority). In light of supposedly getting a stimmie stim check soon, I did donate a small amount to a cyclist who was hit head on by a car that ran a stop sign and was driving on the wrong side of the road. Guy lived probably only because he had a helmet. Something like two broken vertebrae in his neck, broken rib, punctured lung, and a 12 week recovery ahead. Even if he has insurance, those medical bills are going to be rough. They never caught the guy that hit him.
    dang

  38. #38
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    My $.02, the OP has a great heart and is a good person. His/her selflessness is inspiring. I don't think he/she is weird (i.e. messed up in the head).

  39. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by plummet View Post
    Just bear in mind kids ask for stuff all they time. They will go into the isle and want a scooter and an xbox and a trampoline and a basket ball and a tv and and and and.......




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    There’s so many ways to help those in need it’s ridiculous. Approaching a random person/parent and child, and offering to buy their child a bike foolish
    Round and round we go

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    my friend's kids always ask for stuff at the store. he tells them "I want a Ferrari but I ain't getting one".
    Dont make me go all Jonathan Winters on this gas station.

  42. #42
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    Personally I don't think the OP's post and teaching a kid the value of a dollar have anything to do with each other. Kindness, helping those less fortunate, trust in your fellow man, charity, working towards a goal are all valuable lessons and can also exist independently.

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  43. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Scott O View Post


    Sent from my SM-G970U using Tapatalk
    Please share w/Mr Pig and his children...
    The only important thing these days, is rhythm and melody. Rhythm...and melody.

  44. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by WHALENARD View Post
    Personally I don't think the OP's post and teaching a kid the value of a dollar have anything to do with each other. Kindness, helping those less fortunate, trust in your fellow man, charity, working towards a goal are all valuable lessons and can also exist independently.

    Sent from my moto g(6) forge using Tapatalk
    Maybe for a candy bar or pair of socks, but a 300$ bike? Damn, son....
    The only important thing these days, is rhythm and melody. Rhythm...and melody.

  45. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by 127.0.0.1 View Post
    seriously, i wish I was stinking rich beyond belief, I'd hook so many people up


    so, I was in wallyworld just shopping for whatever I needed...I think dish soap an toothpaste, then was checking out wallyworld bikes...and other parts of the store.

    near the bikes was a little girl and her mom, and the kid was begging for a bike and the mom whispering no we can't get that....

    so i am standing there a few feet away knowing I ain't rich but have an OK job and I could buy a wallyworld bike and just give it to them... i could easily just give them a bike

    but I did nothing and ya know I don't want to bother people...in fact I went back to my car and sorted wept a bit about it. I mean what the F man why does this bug me... if I was rich I'd give everyone a bike

    anyhow...I'm screwed up i guess
    Not screwed up at all, it's kinda sad that we can't help everyone all the time.

    Maybe give a little bit in other ways?

    I have an auto debit monthly to our local food bank.
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  46. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crankout View Post
    Maybe for a candy bar or pair of socks, but a 300$ bike? Damn, son....
    That's just it though. There are legions of kids that deserve and would appreciate the hell out of a bike that will never have one.

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    It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.

  47. #47
    NDD
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    Another perspective, getting kids on bikes will make them more fit and also sympathetic to cyclists on roads and other places later in life.
    dang

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    Quote Originally Posted by theMeat View Post
    There’s so many ways to help those in need it’s ridiculous. Approaching a random person/parent and child, and offering to buy their child a bike foolish
    Its the mentality of people to whip out the wallet and buy buy buy buy, while not thinking outside the wallet in ways to obtain the consumer product they want.

    While the op felt sad he couldnt afford to whip out the wallet and buy buy buy buy, there was no thought in seeing what else could be done in order to get a bicycle. Spending some time on the problem was not in the cards, the only thing that was in the cards was the wallet and buying that bicycle right there on the spot. It tug at the heart strings, some tears were shed, a thread was posted to make them feel better and increase their ego. Pats on the back from other online users, yes you are ok for feeling that way. Its an intense online life problem to pour out online and post.

  49. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by WHALENARD View Post
    That's just it though. There are legions of kids that deserve and would appreciate the hell out of a bike that will never have one.

    Sent from my moto g(6) forge using Tapatalk
    I know, I know, but offering up 300$ to a stranger is a very generous act of kindness in these monetarily demanding times. I'll buy the helmet, you get the bike.
    The only important thing these days, is rhythm and melody. Rhythm...and melody.

  50. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by matt4x4 View Post
    You say $200-$350 for a new kids bicycle.
    Buy it used instead, not only are you recycling and saving space in the land fill, but it would cost a lot cheaper too.

    In the aisle at Walmart, flip open the wallet for a quick 5 minutes of your time
    Actually look for a charity to help out, 30 minutes of your time.
    Go out and buy a used bicycle, tune it up, a lot more then 30 minutes of your time.
    I like your line of thinking here...
    The only important thing these days, is rhythm and melody. Rhythm...and melody.

  51. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by mileslong View Post
    I never see compassion as a weakness or "screwed up". In fact it makes me grateful that those feelings still exist in mankind at large, especially during the current state of affairs.
    This.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Pig View Post
    Avid is spelled wrong, there should be an 'O' in there.

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