kinder and gentler- Mtbr.com
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  1. #1
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    kinder and gentler

    Over the past month I have embarked on an experiment to become a gentle commuter.
    After reading on several different forums how other commuters enjoyed a calmer more enjoyable commute after they, as I read it, gave up their rights and went with the flow.

    But I was beginning to hate riding and people so I had to try it. I have been following all traffic rules. Waving thanks to cars that yield even though I have the right of way. I no longer flip the bird, scream, curse, chase people down and challenge them to fights. I wear reflective clothing and have installed lights. There must be some other stuff I'm doing as well that I can't remember now.

    I did not want my experiment results to mirror the results I had read. I like my justified anger. I like being right and being bullish when commuting. I hate people. So as the universe would have it, the experiment has given me the same results as the others.

    My commutes are much calmer, I am in a much better mood when I arrive at work. Once I stopped thinking about the road being mine and realized it is ours, the hate began to slip away. I forgive people their stupidity and realize I am not being maliciously targeted.

    So if you are at a breaking point in your commuting, give cooperation a try.
    I still kinda mad it worked.

  2. #2
    Bedwards Of The West
    Reputation: CommuterBoy's Avatar
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    Why this month? Is it because you're an elf and it was affecting your toy making performance during the busiest month of the year at the workshop?

    That's actually pretty cool. I only commuted in LA county for a year and a half before I moved to the sticks and stopped having to deal with people, but I could see it making me pretty bitter. Where are you commuting?

    I am pretty rural, but I do wave a 'thank you' when someone gives me the right-of-way even though I'm supposed to have it, and I follow the rules, even though I have no street lights or real traffic to deal with. I still have people slow down to let me know that I'm an idiot for riding in the rain or snow every now and then, but MY attitude is great.
    You have no excuse for driving to work
    (unless you don't have studded tires)
    (no excuse for that either)

  3. #3
    weirdo
    Reputation: rodar y rodar's Avatar
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    I`m glad you`re happy Elves, but...
    I hope we didn`t spoil your fun!
    Recalculating....

  4. #4
    No-Brakes Cougar
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    Well, that's good news. I've actually been moving in the opposite direction. I used to try to stay out of people's way as much as possible. Now I'm like "F*ck you, you can go around me if you don't like it. And you probably will anyway." Mainly because I used to ride as close as possible parked cars and almost got doored a couple of times. I also take the lane when turning left now, because I've had too many people pass me on the right and just make a left in front of me, cutting me off. Cars backed up at an intersection? F*ck 'em, hop the curb and pass 'em all. Nobody's paying attention and nobody gives a sh!t, if you lower expectations of other drivers then it's a lot less stressful. Sorry, I'm ranting/hijacking. Anyway, congrats Elvez. Whatever makes your commute easier is good!
    R.I.P. Ronnie James Dio ~ July 10, 1942 May 16, 2010

  5. #5
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    Man Gary the no trash cougar you are gonna suck me right back into my hate sphere.
    I am laughing my as* off right now.

  6. #6
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    I am in this constant conflict of deciding to be polite or just do what's best. Usually I get passed stupid close if I ride with courtesy so I tend to ride like the law intends me too. Then it gets really fun when people honk at me and get mad. Last week this guy honked at me while I was riding in the middle of the substandard width lane. It had a center turning lane and there wasn't any oncoming traffic so he could have gone around. Instead he honked. I waved. He honked. I waved again. He honked again. I started moving my arms like I was running as I rode. Next time I'm going to paddle a boat. Then we go down the hill and it goes into two lanes. I take the left because I'm going to make a left and it gives me an escape route. He hammers the accelerator on his Caddy and yells, "F a g g o t" then slams on the brakes for the red light at the bottom of the hill. I was going to pull up next to him in the left lane and ask if he was asking if I was and if he wanted a BJ in the abandoned Burger King drive-thru around the corner but he swerves over into the left lane, cutting me off. So I just got stealthy and followed him to the post office and took a picture of his car and license plate. I should have gone in the building and had a peaceful discussion. The security cameras would have told the true story he tried anything.

    I usually enjoy myself much more when I'm totally in the right and pissing motorists off.

  7. #7
    weirdo
    Reputation: rodar y rodar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Schmucker
    I usually enjoy myself much more when I'm totally in the right and pissing motorists off.
    Passive aggression. Fun, ain`t it?
    Recalculating....

  8. #8
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    i prefer aggressive passion but whatever!

    my "angry at the world" or "smily at everyone" moments waffle with caffeine intake...
    If steel is real then aluminium is supercallafragiliniun!

  9. #9
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    I've got a kinder gentler machine gun hand...

    ...metaphorically of course. I try my best to be nice and not overly aggressive, but I'll assert myself when necessary. I try not to get too worked up though.

  10. #10
    No-Brakes Cougar
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    Quote Originally Posted by elvez
    Man Gary the no trash cougar you are gonna suck me right back into my hate sphere.
    I am laughing my as* off right now.
    Oh, don't pay any attention to me man. I'm just bitter. You're right that it's better to not get mad, but it really isn't very easy.

    Quote Originally Posted by Schmucker
    So I just got stealthy and followed him to the post office and took a picture of his car and license plate.
    You should start a website! Not sure if it's still up, but years ago there were a couple of guys here in the Bay Area who used to take pictures of bad drivers on their commute; license plate, car, even face if they could get it and post it up on their website as a "warning" to other drivers.
    R.I.P. Ronnie James Dio ~ July 10, 1942 May 16, 2010

  11. #11
    I'm SUCH a square....
    Reputation: bigpedaler's Avatar
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    I've gone 'round and 'round on the bike advocacy/commuting issues, and I always wind up back where I started -- I do WTF I please, and the driver who doesn't like it can floss out my dingleberrys. In the lane? When needed, and if they don't like it, there's hundreds of other streets. One guy threatened to run me over AND shoot me when I didn't move over for him INTO parked cars -- I invited him out of the car, while his gf was screaming, "Just go on!" to him.

    Sidewalk? There are places it's better, and there's more fun to be had, because they don't maintain them well in this city, either. There's a stretch, about a hundred and fifty yards or so long, that's more technical than most of the trails around the area -- my daughter calls it "galactically AWESOME!" I'll take a sidewalk when I feel like it.

    I ride MTB for all my riding so I can do these things, AND because it's the best way to go. Versatility is the key.
    A bike is the only drug with no bad side effects....

  12. #12
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    With Christmas looming motorists sure are in a rush. I've gone months without issues, and now it's almost every ride for the past two weeks. Last night a guy passed me about 1ft away. I noticed a cop sitting on the side of the road in the next block. Finally, a cop is there when you need one, right? I stop and tell him and he blows me off saying he's on a call. You're sitting there doing nothing!

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