Parking Lot Posers- Mtbr.com
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  1. #1
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    No good Parking Lot Posers

    You got dressed for your ride at the Matthew Winters today listening to Nine Inch Nails but left your car window cracked when you drove away listening to Katy Perry.

  2. #2
    DWF
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    Katy who? Poser.
    A man must have enemies and places he is not welcome. In the end we are not only defined by our friends but those against us.

  3. #3
    ACC
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    you rule teh internets so good.

  4. #4
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    Did they change clothes out in the open or did they do it in the privacy of their own vehicle? Cause that's what really matters
    Redstone Cyclery
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  5. #5
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    I take it you don't like NIN then?

  6. #6
    zrm
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    What, pray tell, is proper parking lot music selection?

  7. #7
    how heavy are you ??
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    Thank God this post matters!
    What does Marsellus Wallace look like, A BIT*H? :)

  8. #8
    Now with 20% more fat!!
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    My favorite posers are the dorks who listen to other people's music and then go on the Interwebz to critique their selections. Those dudes are full-on dorks!!

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by JSD303
    My favorite posers are the dorks who listen to other people's music and then go on the Interwebz to critique their selections. Those dudes are full-on dorks!!
    I agree w/ this. However, why do some pull into a parking lot feeling the need to force feed everyone in the lot their latest baseline at a volume louder than The Who concert in Buffalo, NY when Toronto heard it across Lake Ontario (yeah this dates me...whatev)?

  10. #10
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    Beware of the dude watching dudes getting dressed at Matthew Winters
    Somebody better get me a stamp...I'm gonna send it

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by zrm
    What, pray tell, is proper parking lot music selection?

    The proper selection is the OFF button.

    I know this will be hard to understand for most of the parking lot DJ's out there. But most do not care how cool your music is and do not want to hear it. This rule applies no matter if it is AC/DC, Rage, Katy Perry or the 1812 Overture.

    Once you hit the parking lot, be respectful of other people in the world and turn off your personal soundtrack please.
    "Biking lets you come alive both in body and spirit- the bike disappears and you feel as if you're suspended in midair"GKlein

  12. #12
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    Best parking lot music I've heard was at the tanks up on Sand Flats Rd as I was getting ready to ride Porc for the very first time. I was just gonna do an out and back when I heard some great tunes coming from that car over there. When I asked them what it was (Swervedriver "Raise") we hooked up and I got to do the full ride down to 128 with a ride back up to my truck.

    Riding Porc for the very first time. On a hardtail. Not knowing nothing about what to expect with each passing mile. I almost went off the edge on the lower singletrack (it was close). Good times.

    Helmet may be Bike Park music but Swervedriver has been described as music you'd play while driving 100 mph across the desert at night. Here's a few examples:

    <iframe title="YouTube video player" width="480" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/XRwDljiIxzk" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

    <iframe title="YouTube video player" width="480" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/e1o81ZBCSRc" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

    Some of their earlier stuff might be a little "inaccessible" for some but not for me. These two are from their third and second albums. It was a trip finding these two videos, takes me back 15 years.
    Last edited by xcguy; 04-05-2011 at 04:30 PM.
    Wait your turn, take your turn, cover your azz John Correia

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by DWF
    Katy who? Poser.

    Dood, Elmo knows wassup

    the drugs made me realize it's not about the drugs

  14. #14
    Rigid in Evergreen
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    Is Katy Perry someone who works for Charlie Sheen?

  15. #15
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    A friend of mine likes to crank really bad metal (don't get me wrong, I like metal, just not bad metal) in the lot. At the ski area, and at the trailhead. Drives me nuts. I usually avoid riding or skiing with him because of this. If you need to hear bad music really loud buy some headphones and crank it up, don't make me listen to that **** and don't assume that everyone else wants to hear it.

  16. #16
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    Katy Perry is a goddess. She's totally going on my laminated list! My argument is that guys like to listen to what others might think is cool while getting dressed. They do it at ski area parking lots as well and they like to listen to it really loud. It's usually the guys with a grenade decal on the back window.

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by bipolarbear
    A friend of mine likes to crank really bad metal (don't get me wrong, I like metal, just not bad metal) in the lot. At the ski area, and at the trailhead. Drives me nuts. I usually avoid riding or skiing with him because of this. If you need to hear bad music really loud buy some headphones and crank it up, don't make me listen to that **** and don't assume that everyone else wants to hear it.
    +1
    Makes me want to figure out a way to develop a portable EMP gun...

    Does anyone know if you can taze a car and fry its electronics?

  18. #18
    Stiff yet compliant
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    My favorite parking lot pose.


  19. #19
    not actually bad :)
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    If you're going to crank your music in teh lot, at least let it be Lynyrd Skynyrd (skiing or biking - not snowboarding though - that would require something more gnar-core).
    Gotta hand it to ya nitecrwler, you come up with some good threads!
    Old Codger

  20. #20
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    wait a minute...

    Quote Originally Posted by nitecrwlr
    You got dressed for your ride at the Matthew Winters today listening to Nine Inch Nails but left your car window cracked when you drove away listening to Katy Perry.
    how long were you sitting in car watching people as they arrive, get ready, go ride, come back, and leave. Who's the parking lot poser, the guy who rides his bike, or the guy who sits at the trail head all day?

  21. #21
    Your bike is incorrigible
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    Anybody got a problem with me blasting Scrotumgrinder? I get tired of the man trying to keep me down while I air out my nads before a ride.

  22. #22
    Oh, So Interesting!
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    Quote Originally Posted by WKD-RDR
    Dood, Elmo knows wassup
    I'm a fan. Never heard her music, but I'm def a fan....

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by FR hokeypokey
    The proper selection is the OFF! button.
    Good call!

    <iframe title="YouTube video player" width="640" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Wu-743Hy1RI" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
    Trailwrecker at large

  24. #24
    starladear
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    I thought that's what ya do at trailheads. Strike poses while the people riding from town get a good laugh at ya... And your music

  25. #25
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    Air guitar is way underrated



    I do agree that there is some music you have to keep to yourself to not get a poser stamp. Not sure how trail tested Katy Perry is.

  26. #26
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    Does the poser stamp go above or below the tramp stamp?
    Golden Bike Park

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  27. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by bad andy!
    If you're going to crank your music in teh lot, at least let it be Lynyrd Skynyrd (skiing or biking - not snowboarding though - that would require something more gnar-core).
    Gotta hand it to ya nitecrwler, you come up with some good threads!
    Gotta do something to pass the time between rides right? I like to point out the curiosities I witness when observing the human condition.

  28. #28
    Rolling
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    Also, a bike ride doesn't require a 90 minute maintenance session in the parking lot.

  29. #29
    starladear
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    Quote Originally Posted by lidarman
    Also, a bike ride doesn't require a 90 minute maintenance session in the parking lot.

  30. #30
    BMW 2002, Dodge A100, etc
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    Ideas for Poser Stamps -->








  31. #31
    John has a long moustache
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    I'm not name-calling. I'm just listing the facts. The fact is that you did NOT have 6in inserted----alexrex20

  32. #32
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    Your favorite band sucks.
    Gone are the days we stopped to decide,
    Where we should go,
    We just ride...

  33. #33
    DWF
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    Quote Originally Posted by dbabuser
    Does the poser stamp go above or below the tramp stamp?
    Definitely needs a like button.
    A man must have enemies and places he is not welcome. In the end we are not only defined by our friends but those against us.

  34. #34
    contains quinine
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    Quote Originally Posted by lidarman
    Also, a bike ride doesn't require a 90 minute maintenance session in the parking lot.
    After showing up 20 minutes late?

    That's not a problem. I've got all day.
    Take the long cut, we'll get there eventually.

  35. #35
    Goofing off?
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    "Ya down with PLP - ya you know me!"

  36. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by lubes17319
    Good call!

    <iframe title="YouTube video player" width="640" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/Wu-743Hy1RI" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

  37. #37
    Rolling
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    There's a shirt for this too...

    <a href="https://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="https://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y228/lidarman/posin-2.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

    life is good.
    Last edited by lidarman; 04-05-2011 at 07:12 PM.

  38. #38
    Your bike is incorrigible
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    You know why I HATE 18 Road Fruita? Because these posers camping next to us decided to spend all fugging night working on their bikes under a canopy of mega bright flood lights. "Oh, my crank makes a little squeak, so I should spend eight hours taking apart". That is the ultimate in parking lot poserness. I'd like to nuke 18 Road.

  39. #39
    Arrrgggghhh!!
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    No luck on Google, where did you find this? I want a t-shirt.

    Quote Originally Posted by lidarman
    There's a shirt for this too...

    <a href="https://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="https://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y228/lidarman/posin-2.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

    life is good.
    Give 'da people 'da air.

  40. #40
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    too much free time

    If you have that much time to jack around, either blasting tunes or monkeying with the bike, at the poser lots of White Ranch, Walker Ranch, Hall, Road 18, etc....you ought to be doing some volunteer work at a school, shelter or nursing home.
    Last edited by jimmy; 04-05-2011 at 08:18 PM.

  41. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by Guyechka
    You know why I HATE 18 Road Fruita? Because these posers camping next to us decided to spend all fugging night working on their bikes under a canopy of mega bright flood lights. "Oh, my crank makes a little squeak, so I should spend eight hours taking apart". That is the ultimate in parking lot poserness. I'd like to nuke 18 Road.
    18 road is not a place to get away from people. But, that's better than the jackasses I've camped next to in Moab that work on their 2-strokes at midnight. Or back in the late 90's on 18 road when all the high school kids would still go up there to party and blast music all night. This is why I now have a truck that can drive a little further away from everyone else to camp when I want to get away.

  42. #42
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    I had a buddy of mine that took "posing" to a whole new level.

    Was part of our group for years, nice guy, good rider, awesome bikes.

    He would always arrive early (30-60mins minimum) so he could clean his spotless bike and talk to anyone that would comment on his cool bike. Before he kind of faded out of the group. He had the annoying habit of wanting to change the ride (shorten) because he was short on time. It got to the point where about half the time he would pose, meet up with us as we got ready, then decide not to ride because he was "out of time"

    Still a good friend but definitely open to ridicule for those of us that still ride together.
    "Biking lets you come alive both in body and spirit- the bike disappears and you feel as if you're suspended in midair"GKlein

  43. #43
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    Ya' gotta' earn your right to pose!

    Quote Originally Posted by jimmy
    If you have that much time to jack around, either blasting tunes or monkeying with the bike, at the poser lots of White Ranch, Walker Ranch, Hall, Road 18, etc....you ought to be doing some volunteer work at a school, shelter or nursing home.
    . . . of trail maintenance. I'm okay with letting a poser pose by a trail he built or repaired
    All other things are rarely equal . . .

  44. #44
    Your bike is incorrigible
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    Let's make a sticky. Put photos of parking lot posers in it. Then whenever someone on mtbr sees a poser in real life, he can throw rocks and chase them out of the parking lot.

  45. #45
    Rolling
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    Quote Originally Posted by BBOC
    No luck on Google, where did you find this? I want a t-shirt.
    I made it. Use it to print a shirt but send me $3

  46. #46
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    It wasn't a parking lot and hard to tell if the guys were poseurs (it was dark) but while sleeping in the back of my truck up on Kane Creek Road, almost to the creek crossing, around 11pm a caravan of jeepers pulled in just over there. That's cool, people gotta camp.

    But they were the loud kind of campers. And they started a huge fire and I was downwind. And about 1am, after their alcohol consumption kicked in, they started driving up a real steep little hill at speed to basically launch off the top. The front end would go up--out, the rear end would track the ground, so for a second I guess they thought they were flying. In the dark.

    Then WHAM, the front end would come down halfway down the other side. Repeat as needed. For another hour. They were having a great time. That's the last time I parked there. In fact, from that night on the place got crazy with motos and drunk campers so I started camping out near Hell Roaring Canyon (at my secret spot).
    Wait your turn, take your turn, cover your azz John Correia

  47. #47
    Ride Everything
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    You don't want to run into this guy in the parking lot:

    GRAVELBIKE.COM - ride everything

  48. #48
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    My wife likes to point out my poserness when I wear flip flops and my cowboy hat. I tell her that's the point. Do or do not, there is no try.
    Redstone Cyclery
    intense*transition*rocky mountain*turner
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  49. #49
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    I was all rockin out with my kak out at the TH yesterday. It felt good; however, there was no one else there to share my pozer dewshness with.

    Unless.... nitestlkr, were you there?
    the drugs made me realize it's not about the drugs

  50. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by WKD-RDR
    I was all rockin out with my kak out at the TH yesterday. It felt good; however, there was no one else there to share my pozer dewshness with.

    Unless.... nitestlkr, were you there?
    Good point: if no one sees you work on your bike for an hour blaring Neal Diamond then not ride, were you poseuring or not? Hafta think about that.
    Wait your turn, take your turn, cover your azz John Correia

  51. #51
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    Call me a poser then because by some of your enlightened observations I must be. My ride isn't simply about the ride, I start to enjoy the night before getting my ***** together. I enjoy packing up the car and putting the bike on the rack. I enjoy listening to tunes on the drive to, at the trailhead (my system wouldn't allow me to blast it if I wanted and agree, I don't want to hear your music and you probably don't like dub) and drive home. I sure as hell enjoy a beer post ride in the lot and sometimes pre-ride. Sometimes, oh the horrors, I have to make some adjustment in the lot. I like to wear casual clothes to the trailhead and generally change there as well. Then, when I'm all ready to go, I ride and enjoy that also.

    *Ironically enough, don't stop by to say hello cause I really prefer you don't. Seriously.*
    Gone are the days we stopped to decide,
    Where we should go,
    We just ride...

  52. #52
    bacon! bacon! bacon!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Whambat
    18 road is not a place to get away from people.
    Totally. Neither is Loma.







  53. #53
    post-ride specialist
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    Quote Originally Posted by lidarman
    There's a shirt for this too...

    <a href="https://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img src="https://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y228/lidarman/posin-2.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

    life is good.

    That's not posing. That's Post Riding.
    Since when did Need have anything to do with this?

  54. #54
    ride
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    Jugdish, you're such a poser. Since when do you drive to the trailhead?
    Redstone Cyclery
    intense*transition*rocky mountain*turner
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    Lyons, CO

  55. #55
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    ...
    Last edited by Tempest3070; 09-16-2014 at 06:00 PM.

  56. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by ignazjr
    Jugdish, you're such a poser. Since when do you drive to the trailhead?

    Well, good point. When I do though, look out cause I'm the guy with beach chairs, sun umbrella, radio, cooler, clothes line, grill, frisbee, dog unleased, junk hangin' out of my shorts, stand with bike partially torn down/built up changing the oil in my car and lovin' it!!
    Gone are the days we stopped to decide,
    Where we should go,
    We just ride...

  57. #57
    bacon! bacon! bacon!
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tempest3070
    What a dump. Everybody should just drive past to Moab.
    Moab was *just* as busy a couple days before those pics were taken.

  58. #58
    hehe ...you said "member"
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    Quote Originally Posted by T10irons
    Beware of the dude watching dudes getting dressed at Matthew Winters
    Best advice of this entire thread
    “Me fail english? Thats unpossible.” - Matt Groening

  59. #59
    post-ride specialist
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    Quote Originally Posted by jake7
    Best advice of this entire thread
    I'd be more concerned about the dude getting UN-dressed at MW.


    (Oh wait, that might be me...)
    Since when did Need have anything to do with this?

  60. #60
    hehe ...you said "member"
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    ... so, if I bring a mariachi band with me to the trailhead, am I a poser if they finish up by riding with me? What if they are on burros?
    “Me fail english? Thats unpossible.” - Matt Groening

  61. #61
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    Are you shuttling the burros on apex or training for burro races?

    Quote Originally Posted by jake7
    ... so, if I bring a mariachi band with me to the trailhead, am I a poser if they finish up by riding with me? What if they are on burros?

  62. #62
    hehe ...you said "member"
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    Quote Originally Posted by cbrock450
    Are you shuttling the burros on apex or training for burro races?
    shuttle?
    at Apex???
    pfft ... would never even entertain the thought ... however, my mariachi friends will only show up on "even" days ...
    “Me fail english? Thats unpossible.” - Matt Groening

  63. #63
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    I'll be at the Marshall Mesa TH with a portable blender for margaritas, Yeti 575 on the Subaru from about 4 to dark. Say hi.

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