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  1. #1
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    Surprises on the trail

    It's was a beautiful day out , so of course riding time. 50 yards into the trail around a blind corner, boom, a 6 inch tree down across the trail. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, easily could have been bunny hopped over but it was a foot and a half off the ground. Needless to say I was super hard on the brakes and the rear tire of the bike was at least 3 feet off the ground as I hit the limb. Saved it enough that I didn't fly over the bars but did smack my knee pretty hard on the bike frame. Positive thing about all of this, damn do my brakes work good. lol.

    What kind of surprises have you encountered on the trail?

  2. #2
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    Seven foot gator almost got me, several snakes, two dear, and hogs are common.
    To have lived without passion, adventure, and thrill, is to never lived at all!!! YOU CAN'T FIX STUPID!

  3. #3
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    My brother and I were doing a late evening ride around a local lake, on our way back to the parking lot and decided to hit one last piece of dirt before the lot. I headed from the road to the cattle gate to open it for him, but he had stopped on the road. I gave the universal "what gives" gesture to him and he yells at me "You didn't see that?!". "See what?", I replied. I looked at where his headlight was pointing and there was a rattlesnake just chillin there. I had zoomed by it on my way to the gate probably about 6 inches from where it was laying.

    Had to bunny hop one in the middle of a downhill fire-road about a week before going around 30mph, too. Saw it too late to make a safe stop. I heard it hiss and rattle as I was flying over it. Not sure if it tried to strike or not, but I could swear I heard something bounce off my frame as I went over it.

    I /really/ don't like snakes. =(

  4. #4
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    I was riding with a buddy who was in way better shape and was way out ahead of me most of the time. Naturally this time was no different. The single track twisted through forested areas and at one point crossed over a fire road and continued on the other side. Being very familiar with this trail I always slow to check for vehicles before flying across. This time as I approached I notices a big rig tractor parked to my left. I slowed down and saw a 400 lb long haul trucker buck naked sunbathing ass up, laying on the ground in front of his truck. He was obviously sleeping because once I realized what I was seeing I busted out laughing and he never flinched. I continued on down the trail and came upon my buddy waiting for me about a mile down. As I came flying up I was laughing very loud and asked him if he seen that. Seen what? was his response. I could barely spew forth the words I was laughing so hard. My response: the 400 lb naked trucker buck naked sunbathing back there. What? No I didn't see that he responded. I'm not sure if he believed me and he didn't want to go back to we continued on. Obviously he flew across the fire road without slowing to check for vehicle driving by or he would have seen him also.

    That was some 15 years ago on a trail called Noble Canyon outside of San Diego. And to this day it's got to be the strangest thing and biggest surprise I've ever encountered riding.
    Last edited by DIRTJUNKIE; 11-15-2015 at 10:34 PM.
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  5. #5
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    Was on a late afternoon ride at Brown's Ranch in AZ this past spring & saw some hikers stopped in the middle of the trail ahead of me. Was trying to get their attention as I approached so I could cruise on through but their minds were elsewhere. Instead of yelling "Strava" I stopped & hopped off the bike. Turns out that was a good thing. They were trying to work their way around a rattlesnake coiled on the trail. Man I hate snakes!

  6. #6
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    Many years ago, riding a normal area that we used to ride nearly every time we went.
    Cruising up the uphill, past a car gate (to keep cars out).

    There's a small 8.5" x 11" sign hanging from a tree, but it's too far ahead to read.

    We're probably 50' from the sign, and we hear rounds flying through the branches just barely (literally, barely) above our heads.

    You never saw 4 mountain bikers scatter so fast. SOMEHOW, I went UNDER the gate, but I for the life of me cannot recall how I made it down the hill so fast.

    That was quite a surprise. Apparently, the sign said something to the effect of "area closed for target shooting!"

  7. #7
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    Not a MTB trail, but less than a mile out of the Tuolumne Meadows campground at Yosemite NP this past September I walked up on what may well have been the most beautiful woman I have ever met...with her pants around her ankles, peeing in the bushes not 3 feet off the trail.

    Most recent surprise biking was wet leaves over wet rocks leaving me standing in the middle of the trail after the bike slid right out from under me. Gave up and went home after having that happen a few times.

  8. #8
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    fuzzwardo, there is nothing like that stopie you get while trying to miss something in the trail. Last week I came around a corner in a downhill section and saw bikes and riders standing around. As the rear wheel came off the ground I had time to think about it. Do I want to let go and slam into a bike, or should I try to land an OTB? I stayed on the brake and landed against one of those guys standing in the trail. He managed to stay upright so I never hit the dirt above my knee. What a rush.
    oops I wasn't clipped in

  9. #9
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    I came within two feet of t-boning a black bear earlier this summer on the trail closest to my house. Came around a blind corner and there she was, running perpendicular to the trail. That was exciting!
    Dear U.S. Forest Service: Please ban all wilderness in my riding areas.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by OwenM View Post
    Not a MTB trail, but less than a mile out of the Tuolumne Meadows campground at Yosemite NP this past September I walked up on what may well have been the most beautiful woman I have ever met...with her pants around her ankles, peeing in the bushes not 3 feet off the trail.
    The absence of information about what happened next is profoundly disappointing....

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by vaer View Post
    Had to bunny hop one in the middle of a downhill fire-road about a week before going around 30mph, too. Saw it too late to make a safe stop. I heard it hiss and rattle as I was flying over it. Not sure if it tried to strike or not, but I could swear I heard something bounce off my frame as I went over it.=(

    If it bit your tire, you could have flatted - you know, snakebite
    Use it, use it, use it while you still have it.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mentor View Post
    The absence of information about what happened next is profoundly disappointing....
    If I'd been 15-20 years younger, I probably would have changed destinations(we were headed in opposite directions) on the spot, but as it was, we both laughed and spoke briefly-after her attire was properly situated
    There's not a whole lot of shame in the backcountry, or at trailhead parking lots, for that matter.

  13. #13
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    Came across what I assumed to be a hooker performing oral favors on a fellow right next to the trail in plain sight.
    Stick around if you're housebroken...

  14. #14
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    it's always one snake or another
    oops I wasn't clipped in

  15. #15
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    I was on a night ride recently and happened upon two young women hiking. They had no lights and were over an hour from the trailhead. It was a loop and they misjudged their speed against the distance and time of nightfall.

    I stopped and chatted with them for a while, asking if they needed any help or if they wanted me to accompany them back, since I was the only one who had light. They seemed leary and declined. I gave them confirmation of directions back to their car and a rough idea of how long it would take them to get back and left.

    I still wonder if I handled this well. They were not in any real danger in this area, but I was not comfortable leaving them in the dark like I did. They did not seem at ease with me in the woods however. My car was in the direct opposite direction of where they were going, and I was on my way out, low on batterly life, so a return trip to ensure that they made it later was not an option.

  16. #16
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    trail nite ride near rail lines
    naked hobos running past your field of vision
    scary af

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gasp4Air View Post
    If it bit your tire, you could have flatted - you know, snakebite
    Love it

  18. #18
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    I've come across snakes, big spiders, even a mountain lion cub...one of the craziest things I saw was a beehive in the dirt. It was the middle of the trail. There are these tubes that the bees would come in and out of. The bees were black. I've only come across it once...the next time I went back...they were gone.

  19. #19
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    Earlier this year, riding through a section of a city park trail that's a more recent addition to the park - formerly a gravel pit operation that was converted to a pay fishing lake facility that got abandoned before it became part of the city park, my wife and I passed a couple of meth heads doing the nasty on a rotten old mattress that was dumped in the woods near the trail.

  20. #20
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    I rode right past this snake a few years ago in Arizona.

    Surprises on the trail-snake-picture.jpg

  21. #21
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    [QUOTE=Harold;12314276... a couple of meth heads doing the nasty on a rotten old mattress that was dumped in the woods near the trail.[/QUOTE]

    How Romantic

    Use it, use it, use it while you still have it.

  22. #22
    Never Forget 9-11
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    A couple of weeks ago I came a round a right hand curve and looked up to see what I finally figured out was a ground hog running right at me. The little guy took a right turn just before he hit me and just kept running off into the woods.
    It's such a fine line between idiocy and genius.

  23. #23
    Fat Is Where It's At Moderator
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    [QUOTE=Harold;12314276... a couple of meth heads doing the nasty on a rotten old mattress that was dumped in the woods near the trail.[/QUOTE]

    About a month ago on a night ride found a couple having sex on the side of the trail, guess that they were so focused on the task at hand that never heard or saw me getting closer.

  24. #24
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    A few years ago I stumbled on a photographer and an attractive young lady preparing to shoot some porn. I didn't realize what was going on right away because they were hiking in from the road and everyone was still dressed. I only figured it out a minute or two later as I puzzled out why a woman would be hiking in sweat pants and high heels and why that dude had such a fancy camera. Then it occurred to me that sweats come off pretty easy and the high heels - well they'd probably stay on. I can be very naive at times. I thought about doubling back for a better view but it seemed better to mind my own business.

  25. #25
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    Ran into a garden orb spider, like ran into. They are about the size of a 1/2 dollar and all green and yellow. They also like to spin webs in the fields on high shrubs and bushes, across trails. On an early morning ride, hit the web, spider right on my left eyeglass lens. Did the crazy man dance, dismount rip the helmet and glasses off, while rolling and running at the same time. Sub optimal.

  26. #26
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    Wild boar :bbbrrrrr: give me the heebie geebies... over the years I've heard them real close running in undergrowth... could have sworn the last one followed me for a bit (or was it the other way round?)...

    I hope I never actually see one whilst riding... I'll need a change of shorts if I do o_0

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  27. #27
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    Mostly just deer that really startle me. Other than that a couple having sex. I just said, "Excuse me." as I rode by.

  28. #28
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    Spied wild turkey riding to the trail, yesterday. He wasn't the least bit interested in us

    Surprises on the trail-11998893_767588716703472_7598906865007696900_n.jpg
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  29. #29
    Te mortuo heres tibi sim?
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    If this trail's a rockin'...

    Florence Nightingale's Stormtrooper

  30. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    Spied wild turkey riding to the trail, yesterday. He wasn't the least bit interested in us

    Click image for larger version. 

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    Actually turkeys scared the crap out of me a couple of years ago. Didn't see them until I was right next to them and started flapping their wings.

  31. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fuzzwardo View Post
    Actually turkeys scared the crap out of me a couple of years ago. Didn't see them until I was right next to them and started flapping their wings.
    oh ya! That's why we stayed on the other side of the road!
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  32. #32
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    Over 25 years of MTBing, I have to think not many surprises remain. We don't have any real dangerous animals, but I had a groundhog growl at me once. THAT was surprising! Almost hit a turkey hen and some chicks, skunks, deer, raccoons... Downed trees on a DH will get your thrill on. Riding into a frog migration (it's just gross - they POP). Riding into a mess of nightcrawlers mating. A couple in a sleeping bag, probably mating. A trail that used to be a downhill to a switchback for years became stairs into a switchback (4 of us crashed in pile on a night ride). A dog laying in ambush on the side of the trail. The builders at a local trail rerouted the trail off of a hillside and over the roof of a shed (it was AWESOME!)
    I could do with a surprise like a suitcase full of money or something.

    -F

  33. #33
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    black bear, and it was huge. far enough away not to be too startling though.
    skunk that came out right in front of me, and fortunately didn't spray
    hot woman peeing in the woods
    two really fat women bathing in a pond
    had someone yell "hot chick in a sun dress!" at us going the opposite direction.....then around the corner, sure enough, hot chick in a sun dress.
    rattlesnake
    cow standing in middle of trail late at night when i only had little petzel LED. two glowing eyes scared the crap out of me.

  34. #34
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    Almost ran over a Keelback snake in Korea at the GoChang bike park. Pretty freaking cool seeing a viper in the wild, something that does not rattle the the snakes in the states.

    Also saw people getting frisky just off the trail in a few places. I hear there are hiking/sex clubs in Korea. Seen it once here in the states off some single track in Texas

  35. #35
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    Sat. morning I was on a lowland trail that passes though a lot of dense growth; you can't see around the corners. Its name is Route 66 for any SoFla riders. I came up on a Sea Hawk, Osprey that was right on the trail. He/She jumped into the air but flew into a bramble, a 3-D maze of bare sticks. I stopped to watch because I can't help myself, but it was amazing to see such a big bird get out of that mess. It didn't fly to far away, I could still see as it landed near the bottom of a large Oak. Didn't stay there to long either but my pals caught-up, stopped and got a good look too. Very fun to be so close to such beauty!
    oops I wasn't clipped in

  36. #36
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    couple having sex
    OK
    naked solo dude
    CREEPY
    cops detaining/arresting handcuffed biker, lying on belly.
    WTF

  37. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by leeboh View Post
    Ran into a garden orb spider, like ran into. They are about the size of a 1/2 dollar and all green and yellow. They also like to spin webs in the fields on high shrubs and bushes, across trails. On an early morning ride, hit the web, spider right on my left eyeglass lens. Did the crazy man dance, dismount rip the helmet and glasses off, while rolling and running at the same time. Sub optimal.
    Half Dollar? That's just a baby.

  38. #38
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    A few years ago I was riding with three or four buddies.
    We came to a trail intersection a mile or so into the woods to find a guy laying face down.
    We stopped about 25 feet away and wondered WTF? Dead guy?
    After a minute one of the guys walked over and gave the guy a little push with his foot.
    Slowly the dude rolled over and sat up, drunk as a skunk. We decided he'd survive, and rode on.
    Hold my beer and watch this!

  39. #39
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    "Tree!!"

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  40. #40
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    A dead guy, just off of the Santa Fe Trail near downtown Colorado Springs. A couple kids flagged me down after having found him. It wasn't pleasant. He was face down and looked dead. I didn't turn him over but his face had been chewed off by rodents (I was told this later by my neighbor who is a cop). I called 911 and the police were there within like 3 minutes. It still bugs me to this day.
    baker

  41. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by IFallDown View Post
    Seven foot gator almost got me, several snakes, two dear, and hogs are common.
    Two dear? I can only stand to have one dear at a time.

  42. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by baker View Post
    A dead guy, just off of the Santa Fe Trail near downtown Colorado Springs. A couple kids flagged me down after having found him. It wasn't pleasant. He was face down and looked dead. I didn't turn him over but his face had been chewed off by rodents (I was told this later by my neighbor who is a cop). I called 911 and the police were there within like 3 minutes. It still bugs me to this day.
    earlier this year, someone's body was dumped in a park near a local mtb trail. The investigation never spread out enough to affect trail traffic...but I was out on the trail that day shortly after the police arrived. the proximity alone is still enough to make me shiver.

  43. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hawg View Post
    Two dear? I can only stand to have one dear at a time.
    Oh dear! There's two deer.
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  44. #44
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    I’ve seen lots of coyotes, rattlesnakes, deer, wild turkey, javelina, etc. to the point that none of them surprise me anymore, but the most unusual surprise was flying around a corner and finding myself in the middle of a family reunion. This was a section of the trail that runs behind some houses, and apparently they had all just come out for a little hike, 60+ people all wearing the same T-shirts. Everyone over the age of five jumped to the edge of the trail, so I had to dodge about a dozen little ones that didn’t know enough move anywhere except right in front of me.

  45. #45
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    While riding in Blue Diamond, Nevada I rounded a turn and came face to face with a huge ram bighorn sheep. I slammed on the brakes and for an instant our eyes met. Then he snorted and quickly bounded off the trail up a hill. I sure am glad I didn't have a set of horns or he might have wanted to do one of those head butts ... like you see on those nature shows!

  46. #46
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    This little dude surprised me... I was at Headwaters last month, and came ripping down the trail - I barely saw him in time, and just missed him.

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  47. #47
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    A couple of years ago, on an early morning commute, I came literally face to face with a big bull moose. I was living in Wyoming at the time, in a small town, and it was pitch black. I slammed on the brakes, and could feel the steam of his breath on my face. He definitely did not brush his teeth this morning. I slowly eased back, he snorted at me a couple of times, and moved down to chomp some willows. Funny thing is that after work, I came home to find him laying under the front window of my house. He was gone by morning, but second guessed myself every morning on the way to work after that.

  48. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carve It Up View Post
    A couple of years ago, on an early morning commute, I came literally face to face with a big bull moose. I was living in Wyoming at the time, in a small town, and it was pitch black. I slammed on the brakes, and could feel the steam of his breath on my face. He definitely did not brush his teeth this morning. I slowly eased back, he snorted at me a couple of times, and moved down to chomp some willows. Funny thing is that after work, I came home to find him laying under the front window of my house. He was gone by morning, but second guessed myself every morning on the way to work after that.
    Let me get this straight. You interrupted a bull moose dining. Pissed off as he was he stalked you? Did you have to get a restraining order?
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  49. #49
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    This summer I ran across two middle aged people having sex on the side of a busy rail trail. I just gave the thumbs up and kept moving. They could have at least hiked over into the bushes a few yards, out of sight.
    Bikin' Bric's Bike Blog

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  50. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bikin' Bric View Post
    This summer I ran across two middle aged people having sex on the side of a busy rail trail. I just gave the thumbs up and kept moving. They could have at least hiked over into the bushes a few yards, out of sight.
    And tripped over their pants around their ankles. That's just dangerous.
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  51. #51
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    How does that Cialis commercial go....when the time is right....

  52. #52
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    I've seen a lot of weird things on the trail but one night I'll never forget. It was a late night fall run and I was in the lead riding a fast DH trail in the game preserve when a huge owl flew in front of me. When I saw in front I don't mean it crossed my path but it flew out in front of me and with me for about 100 yards or more through a twisty trail. It was surreal hauling mail with a huge owl right in my light. It was never more than 10feet from me staying under the canopy till the woods opened up when it shot near straight up. The other rider with me was back far enough he never saw it.
    I like to fart when I'm in front of you on a climb

  53. #53
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    That sounds awesome, and one very compelling reason for a go pro!

  54. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by MnemonicGhost View Post
    That sounds awesome, and one very compelling reason for a go pro!
    A Go Pro at night!?

    Should make for interesting viewing ^^ NOT! ;-P

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    Surprises on the trail-image.jpg

    It's a mushroom, there were Four of them about six feet apart. Never seen them this big before, riding these trails for a few years. The biggest one was on the trail but someone road over it and squashed the center out of it. Not me. Someone else.
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  56. #56
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    20 years ago, I was riding the dirt roads of Topanga State park in Southern Cal. It was brutally hot and no one with any intelligence was outside...except me. It must have been 120 on the trails with not a single bit of shade...anyone who's ridden the area in the west valley around Dirt Mulholland can confirm.

    Anyway, I was climbing a loooooong section of dirt road in misery. Head down, moving slowly, and not wanting to look up because I knew the top was a long way away. Just focus on your front wheel. Until I heard something ahead of me. I looked up right as I was passing a group of three hikers coming down the road. They surprised me because I hadn't looked up in a while. They were probably 20 feet ahead of me when I saw them...three young women, all topless. Hiking shorts, hiking boots, and carrying their shirts.

    They said "hi" as I passed. I stammered and by the time I could say anything, they were already behind me. I just said "thanks..." and kept grinding up the hill.

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    Quote Originally Posted by KevinGT View Post
    20 years ago, I was riding the dirt roads of Topanga State park in Southern Cal. It was brutally hot and no one with any intelligence was outside...except me. It must have been 120 on the trails with not a single bit of shade...anyone who's ridden the area in the west valley around Dirt Mulholland can confirm.

    Anyway, I was climbing a loooooong section of dirt road in misery. Head down, moving slowly, and not wanting to look up because I knew the top was a long way away. Just focus on your front wheel. Until I heard something ahead of me. I looked up right as I was passing a group of three hikers coming down the road. They surprised me because I hadn't looked up in a while. They were probably 20 feet ahead of me when I saw them...three young women, all topless. Hiking shorts, hiking boots, and carrying their shirts.

    They said "hi" as I passed. I stammered and by the time I could say anything, they were already behind me. I just said "thanks..." and kept grinding up the hill.
    I'm guessing this is on your Most Regrettable Moments top 10 list?

  58. #58
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    we had an old man running the trails in nothing but a swim brief while holding a machete.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 53119 View Post
    we had an old man running the trails in nothing but a swim brief while holding a machete.
    Trail maintenance day I presume?
    Stick around if you're housebroken...

  60. #60
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    My list includes the annual ritual of having a deer/coyote/fox scare the crap out of me on an early morning (pitch black ride). Years ago I ran across two folks out for a stroll with a Tec-9 and a 12 gauge single shot shotgun (barrel bobbed and stock cut down) in a city park. The LEO I talked to about them seemed familiar with them. We're a right to carry state, but that seemed "intimidating" to me since I didn't have my awesome strap available. Worse ride ever was the time I got skunked, ruining a pair of leather boots. One of my cycling friends rode up an a deceased transient on his way to work. I have no idea how he knew the guy was deceased, I usually assume slumped over means "nap time."
    The most expensive bike in the world is still cheaper than the cheapest open heart surgery.

  61. #61
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crankout View Post
    Trail maintenance day I presume?
    we actually do the maintenance. he was not a nice guy. we asked him what he was doing and he said he was cutting and putting debris down to "slow" riders down. creating trail hazards around blind corners and ledges for all users. never mind he was wearing headphones and swinging a machete while users were coming around blind to him. crazy af.

  62. #62
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    Quote Originally Posted by 53119 View Post
    we had an old man running the trails in nothing but a swim brief while holding a machete.
    Had a similar one on the same trail as I posted about the three topless women above.

    But instead of a machete, I saw an old man walking in a speedo brief carrying a big rock in each hand.

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    Yesterday an off-leash dog bit my front tire before his owner could call him off PFFFFFFFFFFFFFFT

  64. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by KevinGT View Post
    Had a similar one on the same trail as I posted about the three topless women above.

    But instead of a machete, I saw an old man walking in a speedo brief carrying a big rock in each hand.
    your's is more porn movie while mine is more 10 o'clock news. you win.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 53119 View Post
    your's is more porn movie while mine is more 10 o'clock news. you win.
    I think mine was more "escaped mental patient" versus porn movie...which reminds me...

    In that same area (Santa Monica mountains, near Topanga), I was climbing a fire road that peaked at what I can only describe as a mini sandstone volcano. It was a large sandstone cone=shaped hill about 100' tall with a flat, sandy depression at the top. I would climb the slickrock and rest at the top with beautiful views of Simi Valley to the north and the Pacific to the south. Great spot.

    So I get to the top and there's a film crew there. A guy with a camera on a tripod, another guy holding a small boombox (this would have been 1992 or so) standing next to a makeup kit, and woman wearing a full length fur coat. I pull up and say Hi...they are speaking to each other in Italian and nod at me. I ask if I can stay and watch a bit and they say something back quickly in Italian and go back to work. Clearly they don't care that I'm there.

    The women then says something loudly to me that I can't understand. She's pointing to my head. Huh? She points to her eyes and then my head again...Oh, my sunglasses? I take off my white and pink Oakley Blades (again...1992) and hand them to the camera guy. He hands them to her and she puts them on. After a few more minutes of jabbering in Italian, the guy hits play on the boom box and some dance music starts blaring. She starts dancing around and, as you probably suspected, eventually drops the fur coat to reveal she's completely naked.

    They film for a few minutes call it a wrap, and start packing up.

    I later learned from some friends that they were filming that same scene up there for weeks, with different women, for some Spanish TV show.

    I got my Oakley's back.

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    Got a few:
    - Two turtles mating in the center of the trail. Snapped a pic, its quite hilarious.
    - Remnants of a party: various tents, campfire, condoms, beer cans, sleeping bags. Found in a city park which is closed to alcohol and camping. Helped the ranger clean the site and haul the refuse out. In doing so, found a cell phone. Turned out to be an underage girl's phone. Oops. Her mom wasn't pleased when the ranger/police officer phoned her from her daughter's phone.
    - Meth head gangbanger admiring me and a buddy's bike at the trail head (Amelia in S.FL). He told us how he was a professional paint baller and had just a built a completely carbon fiber bike: carbon fiber brakes, cables, levers, headset...this was circa 2004. We still laugh about this guy and quote him all the time.
    - Icemand this year, random party dudes in the woods handing out PBR to racers (then lighting a bottle rocket or fire cracker if you slammed it) and then a few miles later, more party goers handing out shots of Fireball. I still can't figure out how the PBR party guys got all the way out there, they had a pop-up tents, music, coolers, lots of stuff.
    - Rode Amasa to Ahab to Jacksons. At the top of Jacksons, one buddy broke his frame and had to carry his bike out. The surprise: bottom of Jacksons was flooded. No access to the trail head / road which was just a few hundred feet away. Interesting situtation for sure. Always completely read your maps when riding in an unfamiliar trail--the map said right on there in bold: "area may be flooded". LOL.
    - Post ride, Moab, dusk, coming back in from Navajo Rocks (think that's the right name-its right over by Mag 7), anyway, a caravan of 3 vehicles (all my buddies and I) were headed east, when a herd of cattle crossed the road. We were pretty much grid locked and not moving. Unfortunately, an 18 wheeler hauling gas came barreling west (head-on or oncoming). It never saw the herd and turned a 500lb+ steer into hamburger. My buddies new F150 got an interesting paint job and air freshener. Horrifying! When we got back to town, people were taking photos and selfies with his cow-poo truck. That is about as crazy as I've seen.

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    I always seem to ride where there is a lot of underwear lying on the path?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Acme54321 View Post
    Half Dollar? That's just a baby.
    Looked really big a 1/2 inch from my eyeball.

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    I was out riding with my wife the other day. We ride into a place where several trails intersect and take a quick brake. Chit-chat with another rider there for about 5 minutes, then he decides to unbutton his pants and step about 10 feet away from us to crack a waz. WTF is wrong with people? The guy had to be in his 50s. No manners at all. We rode off immediately.
    The only trace I leave behind is tire marks.

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    Quote Originally Posted by madreptilian View Post
    I was out riding with my wife the other day. We ride into a place where several trails intersect and take a quick brake. Chit-chat with another rider there for about 5 minutes, then he decides to unbutton his pants and step about 10 feet away from us to crack a waz. WTF is wrong with people? The guy had to be in his 50s. No manners at all. We rode off immediately.
    To paraphrase the old joke -

    Rider 1: Hey buddy! How dare you piss before my wife!
    Rider 2: Aw, gee, sorry, I didn't know it was her turn.
    Use it, use it, use it while you still have it.

  71. #71
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    A teenage girl injecting what I assumed was heroin into the arm of a teenage boy
    No moss...

  72. #72
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    In Moab years ago at the end of Slickrock, I believed its called Shrimp Rock.

    I saw two guys speaking German laughing while breaking off the sandstone and throwing it over the edge. First problem is there's a highway down there. Secondly, they shouldn't be breaking off the slickrock. I rode up and yelled at them to stop and they rode away.

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    A turtle,deer,hen turkey with poults,horse crap with shrooms going in it, snake , spiders,couple in a sleeping bag in the same place every weekend,a chic humming some dude that got mad when I stopped to give em the thumbs up,a open tent with two girls and one dude buck naked in the no camping area of a state park and a wallet with $300 bucks in it.I called the police and turned in the wallet.

  74. #74
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    ^ Damn, that was a crazy ride!

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    That took years D Bone. lol

  76. #76
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    Man, I'm riding in the wrong areas.

  77. #77
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    Quote Originally Posted by madreptilian View Post
    I was out riding with my wife the other day. We ride into a place where several trails intersect and take a quick brake. Chit-chat with another rider there for about 5 minutes, then he decides to unbutton his pants and step about 10 feet away from us to crack a waz. WTF is wrong with people? The guy had to be in his 50s. No manners at all. We rode off immediately.
    20 foot minimum preferably behind a tree. We typically drain it in the midst of the ladies at race events; it's part of the gig as it were. The ladies are used to being around guys and understand.
    Stick around if you're housebroken...

  78. #78
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    Had two live wild predator events happen this summer right before my eyes:

    - A hawk decided to slam a furry animal, I think it was a rabbit almost 1/2 the size of the bird, on the trail just in front of me, letting it go tumbling into the brush to the side. I just kept riding, and didn't stop to take another look, as I was already moving 20+ mph.

    - 2 crows were just chilling on a big boulder on the side of the trail, then suddenly fly off. 1 doesn't quite fly as high, landing on the ground and hopping while flapping. The other circles and swoops around something in the brush. A coyote just swaggers up to the "limping" crow and grabs it in its jaws, turns 180 and swaggers back to the hills, all while paying no mind to the other crow that is circling and swooping at it. The swooping crow doesn't really come closer than 1 ft to the coyote. I'm just there stopped not more than 15 ft from where it happened, just staring.

  79. #79
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    Quote Originally Posted by madreptilian View Post
    I was out riding with my wife the other day. We ride into a place where several trails intersect and take a quick brake. Chit-chat with another rider there for about 5 minutes, then he decides to unbutton his pants and step about 10 feet away from us to crack a waz. WTF is wrong with people? The guy had to be in his 50s. No manners at all. We rode off immediately.
    Yeah, the old jackwagon thread is back.

    I was surprised by a deer and then really surprised by the other one that knocked me off my bike at top speed. ahem.....it was a paved trail on my road bike but still woods. Broke three ribs and got WRECKED for almost 6 weeks. Yeah, helmets 1, Bleeding to death unconscious 0.

  80. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by Varaxis View Post
    Had two live wild predator events happen this summer right before my eyes:

    - A hawk decided to slam a furry animal, I think it was a rabbit almost 1/2 the size of the bird, on the trail just in front of me, letting it go tumbling into the brush to the side. I just kept riding, and didn't stop to take another look, as I was already moving 20+ mph.

    - 2 crows were just chilling on a big boulder on the side of the trail, then suddenly fly off. 1 doesn't quite fly as high, landing on the ground and hopping while flapping. The other circles and swoops around something in the brush. A coyote just swaggers up to the "limping" crow and grabs it in its jaws, turns 180 and swaggers back to the hills, all while paying no mind to the other crow that is circling and swooping at it. The swooping crow doesn't really come closer than 1 ft to the coyote. I'm just there stopped not more than 15 ft from where it happened, just staring.
    I always enjoy watching birds of prey hunt. Makes me think the environment is better somehow.
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  81. #81
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    This didnt happen out on the trail, but I was doing work on my bike in the driveway, when out of the corner of my eye I saw some swift movement near my Jeep parked out in the street. When I went over to investigate, I noticed that a large hawk had taken a rabbit, with both of them under the Jeep. When I got a closer look, I noticed that the rabbit was staring up at me, so I scared the hawk off of the rabbit, the rabbit ran away and the hawk just stayed there looking for it for a while, didn't seem too frightened of my presents.

  82. #82
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hurricane Jeff View Post
    This didnt happen out on the trail, but I was doing work on my bike in the driveway, when out of the corner of my eye I saw some swift movement near my Jeep parked out in the street. When I went over to investigate, I noticed that a large hawk had taken a rabbit, with both of them under the Jeep. When I got a closer look, I noticed that the rabbit was staring up at me, so I scared the hawk off of the rabbit, the rabbit ran away and the hawk just stayed there looking for it for a while, didn't seem too frightened of my presents.
    That's nice =) you offered the Raptor a keep sake for letting its babies dinner escape ;-P

    PS - I need to ride some of these trails ^^

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    Last edited by targnik; 11-26-2015 at 08:42 PM.
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  83. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hurricane Jeff View Post
    This didnt happen out on the trail, but I was doing work on my bike in the driveway, when out of the corner of my eye I saw some swift movement near my Jeep parked out in the street. When I went over to investigate, I noticed that a large hawk had taken a rabbit, with both of them under the Jeep. When I got a closer look, I noticed that the rabbit was staring up at me, so I scared the hawk off of the rabbit, the rabbit ran away and the hawk just stayed there looking for it for a while, didn't seem too frightened of my presents.
    Were they Christmas presents?

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    Was riding some back roads on an Air Force base in Alaska and made a left turn and next thing that I saw was a herd of moose, 1 Bull with a couple of cows and calf which were spread out on the left and right side of the dirt road so not knowing better I just kept on riding thru them and came back later which they were still there eating and rode thru again and mentioned this to my roommate when I got back and he told me that I was lucky the Bull didn't chase me since there were some cows/calf which they usually protect. I did ride real slow thru them and this was my first time that I encountered moose.

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    Ok smart a$$, there were no Christmas 🎁

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    Quote Originally Posted by Hurricane Jeff View Post
    Ok smart a$$, there were no Christmas 
    He's referring to the spelling of presence, not presents.


    Great story by the way. I'm a huge fan of nature experiences.
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    Yeah DJ, I got that.....

  88. #88
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hurricane Jeff View Post
    Yeah DJ, I got that.....
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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    I'm in the UK where snakes are fairly uncommon, so I was quite surprised the two occasions I saw 80cm long snakes

    Other surprises include :

    Two carrier bags of porn, why would you take that much porn to the woods? If you have tired of your porn put the stuff in a bin. Don't carry it into the woods and deposit it for someone else to clean up.

    A paper mache, chicken wire and balsa wood tree that was so realistic, I only noticed it was fake when I leaned my bike against it and the thing moved. I could never work out how or why it got there.

    Some chap taking gratuitous photos of his wife peeing (Each to their own. But seriously, if that is what floats your boat, go further away from the trail)

    A family of wild boar in the forest of dean

    A film crew, filming a BBC drama

    What looked like remnants of a pagan ceremony

    I once came round a corner doing nearly 30mph to find a tree had blown over in the night. I hit the ground head first about 4 meters the other side of the tree.

    And finally, on a late (03:00AM) night ride, I emerged from the woods into a car park full of doggers. They were as surprised as I was.

  90. #90
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    Quote Originally Posted by robinfisk View Post
    And finally, on a late (03:00AM) night ride, I emerged from the woods into a car park full of doggers. They were as surprised as I was.
    Thanks, Urban Dictionary, for helping out with this one!
    Last edited by June Bug; 12-07-2015 at 08:23 AM.
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    Sorry, the term is universally known slang in the UK.

    I overlooked the global nature of this forum and I'm not going to post diagrams to explain.

    My favorite was the snakes because it is something I see so infrequently in the UK.

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    I went zipping around a curve on the trail last week and noticed a bike propped against a tree. Cut my eyes away from the bike against the tree just in time to swerve around the rider in the middle of the trail doing push-ups. People can be pretty stupid.
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    Quote Originally Posted by PineyRose View Post
    I went zipping around a curve on the trail last week and noticed a bike propped against a tree. Cut my eyes away from the bike against the tree just in time to swerve around the rider in the middle of the trail doing push-ups. People can be pretty stupid.
    Classic dumbness. I can't help imagining a sight gag where the chump is oriented feet toward you, and as he pushes up, your ride up his legs and use him as a launching ramp.
    Use it, use it, use it while you still have it.

  94. #94
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    Quote Originally Posted by PineyRose View Post
    I went zipping around a curve on the trail last week and noticed a bike propped against a tree. Cut my eyes away from the bike against the tree just in time to swerve around the rider in the middle of the trail doing push-ups. People can be pretty stupid.
    Best case, it's a bunny hop, worse case you've got a loud jump ramp. You can't fix stupid, but in nature stupid is painful. Be natural.
    The most expensive bike in the world is still cheaper than the cheapest open heart surgery.

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    I'm used to dodging trees, squirrels and wildlife but this was a first. All he did was turn his head toward my tires as I went flying by. He never got up and moved or anything. He's lucky he didn't have knobby tracks up his back, or worse. I know he wasn't hurt or dead or anything because I made another pass through and he and the bike were both gone.
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    Quote Originally Posted by PineyRose View Post
    I went zipping around a curve on the trail last week and noticed a bike propped against a tree. Cut my eyes away from the bike against the tree just in time to swerve around the rider in the middle of the trail doing push-ups. People can be pretty stupid.
    Probably our future president [or current one] getting in shape.
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  97. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    Probably our future president [or current one] getting in shape.
    The Donald doesn't do push ups. He has someone who does that for him. (Maybe that guy on the trail?)
    Use it, use it, use it while you still have it.

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    Years ago, I came across a skunk along the side of the trail. I was a bit startled at first, but then crept closer and noticed he seemed rather docile. I inspected closer, and noticed he was in the process of swallowing a huge banana slug! The skunk seemed very sluggish and stupefied, and was drooling. I'm not sure it he was drugged by some king of banana slug chemical, or what. The skunk barely took notice of me, and I was able to gently tap it with my foot, with no response.

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    Several years back as I was heading for home on a local fire road, a momma bear crossed the road in front of me and disappeared into the brush ( at that moment I didn't realize it was a momma) then as I arrived at the point she had crossed, a cub entered the road. I've never done this maneuver on a bike since that day - but I did a 360 degree turn/bunny-hop and missed that little guy by litterly inches. He was screaming bloody murder and as I landed and kept on pedaling away momma was coming back up onto the road. I saw both butts leaving the road as I hightailed it back home. Whew!! near miss
    JB

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    Totally unexpected...

    Surprises on the trail-199537_10150135987532970_3402988_n.jpg

    People having sex under the train trestle...

    I guess it's a free country...
    A mountain, a lake, a trail, all waiting there...

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