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  1. #51
    involuntary dismounter
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    i hocked a loogie on the trail and my bicking buddy's comment was:
    'a bunch of dudes in pick-ups within a 100 mile radius just got boners'.

    what can i say...i'm a classy babe!
    Solo Trail Explorer and Granny Gear Ninja!


    friends will help you move, good friends will help you move a body...

  2. #52
    3 "fiddy" for short
    Reputation: be350ka's Avatar
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    This was not said to me but what in the hell is this guy thinking when the only thing that he can say to his buddy who is tied in knots is "can you walk"?

  3. #53
    3 "fiddy" for short
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    What would your comment be to this guy?

  4. #54
    mtbr member
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    "I like your little purple man", was once said to me while riding my fixie.
    Attached Images Attached Images
    Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back.

  5. #55
    lover not a fighter
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    "you are...a God..."

    says my 15 year old nephew after leading the way down a particularly gnarly descent

  6. #56
    Anytime. Anywhere.
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    A few years ago in Sedona I round a corner to find a steep climb with a ledge, the kind where I figure I have about a 50/50 chance of making it, except I'm pretty tired at this point. To top it off there are about 10 older hikers at the top and they stand off to the side to watch. Great, I'm riding solo and now I have an audience. I get on the nose and concentrate, lift the front, push forward, clear the ledge, and then make it to the top. For this I got cheers and a round of applause.
    I got some bad ideas in my head.

  7. #57
    banned
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    Nothin' but Drew!

    Said after I cleaned an uphill rock garden

  8. #58
    life is a barrel o'fun
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    When my friend's 6-year-old daughter came biking with me, and while biking around the neighborhood, she crashed.

    As she untangled herself from the pile of pink streamers and Barbie flag, she stubbornly exclaimed, "You don't have to come help me just because I fell!" I tried not to chuckle while watching her gather herself together again.

    This was just a few minutes after she shouted, "I like riding bumps!!" We spent about half an hour riding over a series of little bumps we found in the street so she obviously meant it.

    The other day, as I kept pace next to a roadie during a climb in Central Park on my hardtail (and sneakers and full CamelBak), I said that I'd like a bike like his someday- innocuous chitchat. He replied, "You're doing pretty good on that thing." Hey, I'll take it!!
    "We sat outside the dentist, tooting a horn on the guy's bike."-overheard in the Underground

  9. #59
    amar la vida de dos niner
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    "Hey, the water is cold today!"

    From a guy running in only shoes and socks at a local trail that has several creek crossings.

    In Texas.

    In the summer.

  10. #60
    Now broadcasting from CO
    Reputation: PAmtbiker's Avatar
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    Marysville MTB weekend

    Enurance race. I was on my 3rd or 4th out of 6 hours. I passed some guy who was gassed from the XC race. We rode together for a whileand I was like:

    "Yeah I got a few more of these laps left. I'm just gonna conserve energy now."

    He said:

    "Holy ****!!! Your racing endurance!!! Jesus!!"

    That made my day.
    Brought to you by rocks.

  11. #61
    mtbr member
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    Quote Originally Posted by scorpionwoman
    From a guy running in only shoes and socks at a local trail that has several creek crossings.

    In Texas.

    In the summer.

    And it's deep too!

    I say that every time I piss off the Golden Gate.
    Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back.

  12. #62
    Reviewer/Tester
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    Good job! Compliment...

    Holy sh!t !

    How old did you say you were?


    R.
    It is inevitable ...

  13. #63
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    I was doing ok, until I got my foot stuck in my camelback

    "I was doing ok, until I got my foot stuck in my camelback"
    Overheard as we were warming up for the expert race and a couple of beginner racers that had just finished their race passed us going the opposite direction.
    I always wanted to hear the rest of that story!

  14. #64
    Old Fart
    Reputation: zeroe's Avatar
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    "I'd almost forgotten how great this is; thanks for getting me back into it."

    Said by a friend after I encouraged her to ride with me, thinking I could pick up some tips from her.

  15. #65
    Old Fart
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rev Bubba
    "Are you a pro-rider"
    Most of my favorite clothes come thrift stores and I have a very cool bottle green T shirt with a "Schwinn Racing" logo on it. I've never owned a Schwinn and don't even know if they have a racing team but I like the shirt.

    Recently I was wearing it on a plane when an elderly lady saw it. Her eyes lit up and she asked "Oh, do you race bikes?" Before I had a chance to explain that I couldn't keep up with the racers if they were all carrying cinder blocks, she sat down and proceeded to tell me all about her late husband who, in his day, had apparently been hot sh*t on the pro-circuit.

    It was very, very neat.

  16. #66
    mtbr member
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    I started in on a longish technical descent with a random married couple I fell in with at the top of the trail. They were both on full squishies and getting after it pretty hard. A little ways into it, I passed the guy who was trailing off. I didn't have a prayer of passing the lady, but I tried to hang on for the fun of it. I managed to stay close enough to her that she'd been thinking I was her husband the whole time.

    When she saw it was me she said, "Whoa, you're on a hardtail?!" I replied that I loved it too much to switch to FS. "Well, you'd be wicked fast if you did, man."

    I've never been a real bomber, so it made my night.

  17. #67
    slow
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    First rider: "Cool - rigid!"
    Second rider: "whoa, and single!"

    As I cleaned a particularly rocky, steep section of a local trail while a group on full squish gearys that couldn't clean it sat and rested.

  18. #68
    Fat Is Where It's At Moderator
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    "That was a cool ride dad, when can we do it again?" from my kid the coolest comment has been "dude you're on a singlespeed!!!"

    Here singlespeeds aren't that common and when people see one they're just amazed.

  19. #69
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    said....

    '' i have never seen anyone clear that section before...''

    this was from a gentleman that was showing us the trails they helped make and it was our first time on them.it was all of about 10 yards to the top but started with a 3 foot cliff that had to be gone over followed by a ledge of only about 2ft followed by a section of roots after that to the top.

  20. #70
    the unvarnished nonsense
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    Perhaps not the coolest, but the three that still make me laugh:

    #3) "You sure you live around here? 'Cuz you don't seem to know f@ckin' sh!t about the trail..." - From a stranger after being told by yours truly that it was all downhill from here (for the fourth or fifth time).

    #2) "Damn. I forgot my limes." -Unknown Canadian rider who produced a large water bottle full of gin and tonic during a trailside break.

    #1) "Want some mint jelly leaves?" - Sara from Canaan Valley, after producing a bag of those funky green candies made by Brach's deep inside the Dolly Sods Northern Purchase area.
    "Sufficient to have stood, yet free to fall."
    -John Milton, Paradise Lost

  21. #71
    mtbr member
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    This past weekend

    Just happened upon a 50 mile road race while camping in Wisconsin. Only had my 32lb FS mtb but a ride is a ride. Cruising up front early on, a gentleman thought he would point out the obvious by saying " You are going to have one hell of a workout on that thing!" He was right. Later on in the ride after climbing a VERY steep hill another gentleman had the audacity to say that I had the benefit of lower gearing making it easier, though he declined my offer to trade..

  22. #72
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    "FLAT-LANDER, SHOWIN' US HOW IT'S DONE!!"

    Said on my first ever ride in SoCal at Knottsberry Farm (I think) in San Diego after I rode a tech section on my Ti HT that one of my guides studied and determined he would do if he had his KHS DH bike him. Not bad from a guy from Missour-ah.

    Buddy made a comment about me "surfing" one time that felt pretty cool.
    "Something Clever"

  23. #73
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trigger
    Not sure about the coolest....but this was pretty funny.

    Cruising down the trail, took a little off-shoot section to hit a rock jump. Didn't land so sweet, here I am sitting on the trail trying to collect my marbles.....http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lsd4iP8_5Do

    Stay on the trail!
    Hahahahah.... I love that video.

  24. #74
    I wonder why?
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    I got a good laugh out of this one.

    My riding buddy was having dinner at a family gathering and he was sharing how tired he was after a pretty intense ride. His over-weight out of shape sister in-law chimes in when he finished his story with. "What's so difficult about mountain biking? All you have to do is pedal."

    As they say, ignorance is bliss.

    i1dry?

  25. #75
    a.k.a. BicycleKicks
    Reputation: 40hills's Avatar
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    Some gal said "nice calves" when I passed she and her friend and then said she wanted to follow me... very flattering. I guess I should have stopped, but I'm a dork.
    I read that on the internet.

  26. #76
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    I was on my road bike last summer and I was wearing a T-shirt and some spandex and I came up to a group of 4 roadies riding in a line up a pretty good sized hill. I jumped on the end of the line at the bottom and carried them up the last half of the hill, when we got to the top I dropped back and the guy riding 2nd wheel said, "Not bad for a guy wearing a T-shirt" and with out missing a beat the guy behind him says, "That's atleast 2 sizes too small"

  27. #77
    Peace Coast Style
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    I was riding through town on my way to the LBS just to chat and I found this little run off section just steep enough to make for some fun. It was right next to the road. A few middle aged couples are walking by just as Im about to ride it. Right as they walk by one of the ladies says "This looks like a stupid idea, lets watch!" I thought it was funny.
    Quote Originally Posted by Internal14
    Ever slip a pedal and slam into the seat? That little thing would disappear until I later got to the ER.

  28. #78
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    My wife said "Hey, there really is a river here" ..................... as we rode alongside the Yellow River at the Yellow River preserve that she'd just driven us to

  29. #79
    sushi lover
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    *during hairy technical descent, a buddy behind me yells out*

    "Hey dude! Your rear quick-release is open!"

    *I take my eyes off the trail, look down and behind to check..."

    "JK!"

  30. #80
    mtbr member
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    Sure a lot

    Of insecure dudes here.
    I got $50 says not more than one in 5 of the chick compliments are true.
    If most of you were half as cool as you try to make others believe, you wouldn't need to try and make others believe.
    Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back.

  31. #81
    govt kontrakt projkt mgr
    Reputation: ArmySlowRdr's Avatar
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    naahh..

    it's true--gals do make nice comments to dudes in the trailhead parking area or on d trail. gals 4 d most part r just genuinely nice. just this spring i got compliments frum ladies in Big Bend and in Austin---well maybe it was really the stumpie.

    Quote Originally Posted by Anonymous
    Of insecure dudes here.
    I got $50 says not more than one in 5 of the guys generally chick compliments are true.
    If most of you were half as cool as you try to make others believe, you wouldn't need to try and make others believe.

  32. #82
    mtbr member
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    I had some fat guy say "Nice Plastic Kona" as i was heading out for a quickie. i simply replied "its steel." yet not only is it steel, its a 30 pound tank of a hardtail. Ive taking the thing out on trails where yetis come back with broken derailers and it doesnt even get flats some how.
    On the happy side, on the same ride, i had chased down a guy on a FS race bike. I just got a simple, "Daaaaaammmmnnn."
    Floridas Other Crazy White Guy....http://www.swampclub.org/smf/index.php

  33. #83
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    "Hey man, how the hell did you get up here without a ticket?" Said to me by the lift attendant at the top of the mountain on the old 24 hours of canaan course who had just come out of his shack for a smoke break. To which my response was "In the second ring on the front."

    A few days later on another ride someone shouted out from the lift on their way down, "You must've some huge balls... not only ridin' down this but climbin up!"

  34. #84
    It's about showing up.
    Reputation: Berkeley Mike's Avatar
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    I can't believe

    you do all that sh*t on a hardtail.

  35. #85
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    In my first year of racing during a Junior race I was grinding up a huge climb and lapping 2 clydesdales (no offense to anyone but they were) when I let out a mondo belch.

    The clyde in front of my yelled out "Hey man did you eat one of those skinny guys back there?"

    I grinded past smiled and said "I am the skinny guy." Keep in mind I was 14 years old and maybe 120lbs at 5'11 in full lycra, I disappeared when I turned sideways.

  36. #86
    mtbr member
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    a car full of chicks once yelled at me (on my road bike)

    "NICE CALVES!"

    and another time, i was climbing some hill and there were people around the sides either resting or walking their bike up and one goes

    "yeah... and people like THAT JACKASS make this look easy!"

    nothing too cool. lol.

  37. #87
    Natl. Champ DH Poser/Hack
    Reputation: cactuscorn's Avatar
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    on a recent trip from iowa to colorado where i was led on climbs no man should have to endure on a 40lb d/h rig: "i was sent back here to motivate you.", a local said to me. sounds sh!tty but it made my day that someone gave a hooie and it didnt hurt that he did indeed get me rollin a bit faster.
    No, I'm NOT back!

  38. #88
    I am the law
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    "Hey, that's a nice Glock you have on your hip"

    Had to smile at that one. Now, if he called it a "tupperware pistol" I might have been a little upset.

  39. #89
    Just hit it with speed
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    "Dude F$%K the bike are you alright?"
    -Riding buddy of mine
    Last edited by GFisher2001; 07-13-2006 at 04:49 AM.

  40. #90
    MTB B'dos
    Reputation: LyNx's Avatar
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    I've actually been told a few of the things posted here, but this one definitely made me laugh when I was told it.
    Quote Originally Posted by GFisher2001
    "Dude F$%K the bike are you alright?"
    -Riding buddy of mine
    Been told "Dude I'm gona stop riding with you!" from a riding bud on a steep. long hill as I had ridden up to the top and come back down to check on him and ride up alongside and encourage him.
    One day your life will flash before your eyes, will it be worth watching??
    MTB Barbados
    My Phantom pics

  41. #91
    mtbr member
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    "Dammit David. You just gave me another reason to hate you."
    My riding buddy after I cleaned a hill that he hadn't before.

  42. #92
    zon
    zon is offline
    Scofflaw Mountain Biker
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    Me: "Howzit going"

    Lady with kid: "This trail doesn't go anywhere"

    Ladies Husband: "And it's not for bikes"

    Me:
    ΜΟΛΩΝ-ΛΑΒΕ


    .

  43. #93
    Loose Nut Behind d' Wheel
    Reputation: Lucky's Avatar
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    "Wow! You made that look easy!" From my ex-husband after he said he wouldn't carry me out if I crashed while riding a little techy section out in Moab. I told him fine, my *friends* would carry me out if I crashed. Then I proceeded to clean it, prompting the exclamation above. Just one of the reasons he is now my ex....

    Kathy :^)
    Look where you want to go. This is as true in life as it is in mtbiking.

  44. #94
    mtbr member
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    Coolest thing I have ever heard

    One of my riding buddies says to the other one:"I haven't had this much fun since I slept with your sister"
    Now everyone around just looks at each other like what the F@#K did he just say???

    After letting everyone soak it in he then says: "Good thing I'm married to your sister."

    Funniest thing was that I had know these guys for years so I knew exactly where he was going with it.

    CLASSIC

  45. #95
    crumblin' erbs
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    "Hey you guys want a hit of this, Its Nothernlights"
    You can't soar with eagles if your flying with turkeys

  46. #96
    mtbr member
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    "Holy Jebus, take off those Ryder sunglasses! They aren't designed to take direct facial impacts!!"- local sue happy rider.
    Gone are the days we stopped to decide,
    Where we should go,
    We just ride...

  47. #97
    pillage! plunder! 4 parts
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    Hard to believe ...

    Quote Originally Posted by Anonymous
    Of insecure dudes here.
    I got $50 says not more than one in 5 of the chick compliments are true.
    If most of you were half as cool as you try to make others believe, you wouldn't need to try and make others believe.
    anything from someone posting with a name like Anonymous
    don't question why you ride but rather why you don't ride more.

  48. #98
    pronounced may-duh
    Reputation: Maida7's Avatar
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    I was going down a series of whoopty do decents on a hardtail. The lack of rear suspension would kick your rear wheel in the air as you hit the flat parts. The last one went into a turn. I rode around the turn on my front wheel like a unicycle hanging on for dear life. The guy behind me said "How'd you do that" My answer was "I don't know"

  49. #99
    mtbr member
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    "Damn dude, where the f**k did you come from?" said to me by a group of riders I came upon riding down Ingles Field Gap.

  50. #100
    mtbr member
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    Quote Originally Posted by skygod74
    "Hey, that's a nice Glock you have on your hip"

    Had to smile at that one. Now, if he called it a "tupperware pistol" I might have been a little upset.
    Glocks are for people, who own guns to be cool.
    Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back.

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