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  1. #1
    oh my TVC 15
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    Best Biking Quotes

    Talking to one of my buddies at work and he reminded me that I once told him "The most expensive bike in the work is still cheaper than the cheapest by-pass surgery in the world." when he was crying over the price of his first bike (Navigator 100). He's now in shape, riding an Ultegra equipped Madone and knocking off about 3K/year on-road.

    So here's the question, what's your best cycling quote?

  2. #2
    heaven help me
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    Stand and deliver.

  3. #3
    mtbr member
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    It never gets easier, you just get faster.
    How can anyone who's been riding as long as I have, be so slow???

  4. #4
    mtbr member
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    "If nobody crashed, it wasn't a good ride."
    (Mountain bikes only).

    For the roadies:
    "If you brake, you lose."
    Mario Cipollini.

  5. #5
    mtbr member
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    It's all downhill from here!

  6. #6
    mtbr member
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    "Shut up legs!" - Jens Voigt
    Guillaume

  7. #7
    9 lives
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    "Whatever happens, don't fight the mountain" - Ben Stiller
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  8. #8
    DFMBA.org
    Reputation: MTBeing's Avatar
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    "It's a mountain bike, get over it. "
    - Kaolin Cummens

    Sent from my mountain bike while crashing
    Please donate to IMBA or your local IMBA chapter. It's trail karma.

  9. #9
    mtbr member
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    Pedal faster. Not harder.

  10. #10
    tg
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    Somthing I like to throw at my ride buds when they start talking about watts and training...."Shut up and ride"

  11. #11
    mtbr member
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    Spin to win!

  12. #12
    mtbr member
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    It's actually steeper than it looks in the video...

  13. #13
    mtbr member
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    I'm not the next Greg Lemond. I'm the first Lance Armstrong...

  14. #14
    mtbr member
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    Best Biking Quotes-twain.jpg

  15. #15
    Keep on Rockin...
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    Thread post... "Why do you ride rigid SS?"


    Reply... "Because I can."

  16. #16
    oh my TVC 15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Keski View Post
    I'm not the next Greg Lemond. I'm the first Lance Armstrong...
    That didn't quite end the way it was supposed to did it?

  17. #17
    RCC
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    Bandolero
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    "Hit that sh!t"
    "It's easy,It's just a controlled skid"
    "You can do it,suspension will soak that sh!t up"
    Bandolero quotes.
    RCC
    I heard the mission bell
    And i was thinking to my self
    This could be heaven or this could be hell...

  18. #18
    29ers Forever
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    Mud adds character.

    "Okay, when you go down this steep rocky road next to a cliff, there is one thing to NOT do"
    "What"
    "Use your brakes."
    "Why"
    "Because braking means death."

  19. #19
    I need skills
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    "Master says faster."
    A dominatrix decal that came with my Bianchi.

  20. #20
    powered by peanut butter.
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    "The secret to mountain biking is pretty simple. The slower you go, the more likely it is you'll crash." - Julie Furtado.

    "Never trust a man in a blue trench coat. Never drive a car when you're dead." -- Tom Waits

  21. #21
    mtbr member
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    "This sucks" - @ Mid ride
    "That was awesome" - @ Ride home

  22. #22
    I like turtles
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    It will be fine.
    Geologist by trade...bicycle mechanic (former) by the grace of God!

    2018 Niner RKT 9 RDO - enduro are #@$%

  23. #23
    Don't Tread on Me
    Reputation: Lopaka's Avatar
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    Hold my beer and watch this.
    Consciousness, that annoying time between bike rides.

  24. #24
    mtbr member
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    "Look where you want to go. Don't look where you don't want to go." - Wayne Richards circa 1994.

  25. #25
    'Tis but a scratch
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    "What's with these recumbent bicycles? Listen, buddy, if you wanna take a nap, lie down. If you wanna ride a bike, buy a >#*%^* bicycle."
    - George Carlin

  26. #26
    29ers Forever
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    Quote Originally Posted by huffster View Post
    "What's with these recumbent bicycles? Listen, buddy, if you wanna take a nap, lie down. If you wanna ride a bike, buy a >#*%^* bicycle."
    - George Carlin
    I agree!

  27. #27
    mtbr member
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    From the other day over beers:

    Me: "I'm thinking about putting those cheater brake levers on the top of my cross bike handlebars - whaddaya think?"

    Buddy: "Is your dad still alive?"

    Me: "Yes. Why?"

    Buddy: "Well, call him and tell him he raised a pu$$y".

    Schmed
    2001 Turner O2 XC
    2012 IndyFab Planet Cross CX
    2013 Kona Raijin SS
    2016 Scott Big Jon

  28. #28
    AZ
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    "Nice Marmot". The Dude.

  29. #29
    mtbr member
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    "Life is like riding a bicycle, to keep your balance, you must keep movin'."

    Albert Einstein.

  30. #30
    On wuss patrol
    Reputation: Glide the Clyde's Avatar
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    "I'm on my mother fukking bike!"
    Sometimes, you need to go fast enough that the trail is a blur to find clarity. -- Wild Bill

  31. #31
    mtbr member
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    "One more time..."

  32. #32
    Ridin' Furry
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    Quote Originally Posted by huffster View Post
    "What's with these recumbent bicycles? Listen, buddy, if you wanna take a nap, lie down. If you wanna ride a bike, buy a >#*%^* bicycle."
    - George Carlin
    Couple ol' chaps i know that ride them due to back and spinal issues. :x

    ".1 segments or die!!!! YOLOOOOOOO "
    ~anonymous strava user

  33. #33
    mtbr member
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    Gravity. I fought the law, and the law won.

  34. #34
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    this is gonna hurt. me

  35. #35
    mtbr member
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    "Speed is your friend"

    "Faster! Until the thrill of speed overcomes the fear of death" Hunter S Thompson

    Speed doesn't kill, a sudden lack of it does.

    Those brakes will only slow you down man...

    That was the last hill...

    It's all downhill from here... except for the uphills

    I was doing pretty good until I ran out of talent

  36. #36
    mtbr dismember
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    This

    "Look at the penalty for failure, dude."

    <iframe width="420" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/t5lhnr0DM04" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

  37. #37
    mtbr member
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    George Bush; if Dick{head} Cheney hadn't been too unhealthy to ride a bike, I'd have been a "GREAT" president!
    breezy shade

  38. #38
    mtbr member
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    Pedal Damn It

  39. #39
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    "The bicycle, mans noblest invention."


    my personal one, at the top of a long climb and being lectured by a guy I passed on how to shift, climbing technique, sitting down, standing up, mashing the pedals, etc.

    me: "look at my derailleurs"

    guy: "oh a singlespeed, never mind"

  40. #40
    bust a move
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    "dude...are you okay?"

  41. #41
    mtbr member
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    read below

  42. #42
    oh my TVC 15
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    Quote Originally Posted by huffster View Post
    "What's with these recumbent bicycles? Listen, buddy, if you wanna take a nap, lie down. If you wanna ride a bike, buy a >#*%^* bicycle."
    - George Carlin
    That's a good reminder to us all not to succumb to the promise of a free lunch.

    I was riding last fall when a guy on a recumbent pulled up on the trail and said
    "You're going to have to get one of these sooner than later!"

    "Really?" I ask, "Why's that?" He tells me "Well because you'll eventually get a bad back and sooner or later you'll want to save energy and ride more efficiently."

    "Well" I replied, "I broke my back in three places in 1981, have a half-collapsed disc and a fused disc but I still like riding wheelies so I think I'll wait until I need a three-wheeler and a fat-ass seat."

    He must not like three-wheelers, cause he doesn't talk to me anymore.

  43. #43
    mtbr member
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    Holy crap, Batman!
    ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΕ

  44. #44
    mtbr member
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    "Bicyclists are the type of people who beat their heads against the wall just because it feels so good to stop."

  45. #45
    Merendon Junkie
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    "Dont buy upgrades, ride up grades"

    Eddy Merkx

  46. #46
    Smarter Than He Looks
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    "Are we gonna dick around all day, or are we gonna ride?" - me

  47. #47
    @2whlfun
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    Riding buddy's comment after a particularly exciting downhill " I need a cigarette after that!" What made it stand out was she is quite fast & pretty hot
    2017 SPOT Brand MAYHEM (incoming) 2016 Spot rollik557, 2016 SPOT Brand Zephyr Adventure Bike 55c, Heller 27.7+

  48. #48
    mtbr member
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    Every time I see an adult on a bicycle, I no longer despair for the future of the human race.

    H. G. Wells
    Gone are the days we stopped to decide,
    Where we should go,
    We just ride...

  49. #49
    Merendon Junkie
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    Quote Originally Posted by twowheelfunman View Post
    Riding buddy's comment after a particularly exciting downhill " I need a cigarette after that!" What made it stand out was she is quite fast & pretty hot
    Pics or it didnt happen

  50. #50
    DFL>DNF>DNS
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    "If the ride doesn't have HAB the views probably suck."

    "If you're not HAB'ing, you're just riding your bike."

    At least that's what we tell ourselves when we're pushing our bikes once again....
    I ride the crappy trails so you don't have to
    My Two Schillingsworth

  51. #51
    psycho cyclo addict
    Reputation: edubfromktown's Avatar
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    Mike Magnuson interview quote: "Im getting to be a Century Rider (bikers who ride 100 miles in one day), and I still race cyclocross. Im not as good as I used to be, and Im not as interested, honestly, in throwing away my life to ride bikes 25 or 30 hours a week anymore."

  52. #52
    mtbr member
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    Best Biking Quotes

    When you drag ass out of bed on a cold Sunday morning to squeeze in a semi-epic with your tribe without disrupting the family flow, enjoy said ride, and return, knackered, to a warm house and your first words are, "Do I smell bacon?"

  53. #53
    @2whlfun
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    "It's so ugly out here. Why do we keep coming to these places?" Sarcasm when seeing beautiful scenery

    "Hey, why don't you lose my number" more sarcasm when having a great time with a buddy
    2017 SPOT Brand MAYHEM (incoming) 2016 Spot rollik557, 2016 SPOT Brand Zephyr Adventure Bike 55c, Heller 27.7+

  54. #54
    mtbr member
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    Everytime my wife get a scar on her legs from pedals strikes i always say.:
    " mmmmm. Sexy!"
    expensive cars are a waste of money. Expensive bikes...not so much!

  55. #55
    ENDO!!!
    Reputation: The Yetti's Avatar
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    "Ride Bikes, Drink Beer, Repeat" Reeb cycles ad.
    Just circles turning circles....

  56. #56
    oh my TVC 15
    Reputation: Forster's Avatar
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    Didn't Ibis or someone used to have a label on their bikes and in their marketing material that said "Don't ride stupid or naked" or something like that?

  57. #57
    mtbr member
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    "I don't want to see you crash, but if you're going to crash, I want to see it."

  58. #58
    mtbr member
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    when in doubt, go faster!

  59. #59
    mtbr member
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    commit, or eat shit!

  60. #60
    mtbr member
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    " That's going to leave a mark"
    " Gravity is a harsh mistress"
    " There are no bad bike commutes, only bad clothing choices"
    " Don't bleed on the couch again" , said by my wife as a result of last
    weeks pedal fest.
    " Ride, dig dirt, repeat"
    " You can't walk out now, who will hep me drink all those cold ipa's"
    " Once you build a trail, it will always be yours" Like looking at new lines and cleaning drainage etc.

  61. #61
    oh my TVC 15
    Reputation: Forster's Avatar
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    From the World's Most Interesting Man

    "I don't always Mountain Bike, but when I do I prefer downhill."

  62. #62
    mtbr member
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    Well...when I do get to a new bike. It will be a 29'r. Then I wont run over my pee pee anymore.
    -Highlux

  63. #63
    Hey, wait up!
    Reputation: LCdaveH's Avatar
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    When I'm riding, my problems can't keep up.

    --
    In best Klingon voice: Today is a good day to ride!

    New Mexico Off Road Series

    Dirt Rocks!

    Let Go, and Let Bike.

  64. #64
    Hey, wait up!
    Reputation: LCdaveH's Avatar
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    Move your ass, and your mind will follow.

    --
    In best Klingon voice: Today is a good day to ride!

    New Mexico Off Road Series

    Dirt Rocks!

    Let Go, and Let Bike.

  65. #65
    oh my TVC 15
    Reputation: Forster's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LCdaveH View Post
    Move your ass, and your mind will follow.

    --
    Or vice versa.

  66. #66
    mtbr member
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    "Bicycle, fast enough to get to the forest, slow enough to see the trees"

  67. #67
    That guy
    Reputation: Cornfield's Avatar
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    My friend's dad after we'd crash our bikes when we were kids:

    "It'll stop hurting when the pain goes away"

  68. #68
    mtbr member
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    From my dirt biking days, "Don't brake, steer"

  69. #69
    mtbr member
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    "See the tree, Be the tree"...
    Look at the tree, and you'll hit it. Look at the line you want to ride.

  70. #70
    wg
    wg is offline
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    "You're grumpy, you need to go for a ride" --My wife.
    Don't harsh my mello

  71. #71
    mtbr member
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    Strava coming through!

  72. #72
    mtbr member
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    "Because it's mountain biking, not spinning classes at Spa Lady!"

    - A friend many years ago explaining to coworkers why we often came to work on Monday morning with cuts and scrapes.

  73. #73
    mtbr member
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    "Medicare doesn 't cover stupid ...."

    So says my wife, TurboB, as I head out the door to ride/ski/surf.

  74. #74
    mtbr member
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    best electrolyte quote of all...


  75. #75
    mtbr member
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    God hates a coward

  76. #76
    mtbr member
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    the older i get the better i was

  77. #77
    mtbr member
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    If you're in control, you're going too slow.

  78. #78
    Inspector Gadget
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    Best Biking Quotes

    My wife to our 7 yr old daughter...

    "What was your favorite part of the ride?"

    She says:
    "When we went down the bumpies"

    This was 2mi of DH over golf ball to baby head sized rocks.
    I hope you have a big trunk... cause I'm gonna put my bike in it!

  79. #79
    Retro on Steroids
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    From the 1979 video of Repack race:

    "Klunking is dusty in the summer, and muddy in the winter."

    "Klunking is like skiing, except when you fall down you don't get snow in your boots."

  80. #80
    mtbr member
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    "Holy S-S-H-H-H-1-1-1-1-T-T-T-T-T-!-!-!-!-!-!"

    Sent from my Kin[G]_Pad
    "Mountain biking: the under-rated and drug-free antidepressant"

  81. #81
    mtbr member
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    Dad's quote. (when things go to sht they go to sht in a hurry)

  82. #82
    mtbr member
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    Charles De Mar: [giving skiing instructions] Go that way, really fast. If something gets in your way, turn.

  83. #83
    I love Pisgah
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    "This is the last climb". -by me, telling some friends mid way on a tough death march of a ride. I'd basically forgotten the trail since it'd been awhile. It was NOT the last climb. Not even close.
    "I've breathed the mtn air, man" Johnny Cash

    It's a long way to the top
    . . . if you wanna rock and roll (ac/dc)

  84. #84
    Just Ride
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    Sex is better with a mountain biker, so shut up, sit down, and enjoy the ride!
    To have lived without passion, adventure, and thrill, is to never lived at all!!! YOU CAN'T FIX STUPID!

  85. #85
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    Quote Originally Posted by Duckman View Post
    "This is the last climb". -by me, telling some friends mid way on a tough death march of a ride. I'd basically forgotten the trail since it'd been awhile. It was NOT the last climb. Not even close.
    I've pulled that one on my wife a few times....She was not amused.

  86. #86
    mtbr member
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    "Look where you want to go. Don't look where you don't want to go." - Wayne Richards, LBS owner circa 1994.

  87. #87
    mtbr member
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    ...
    "It's not that bicycling is so important, it is that everything else is equally unimportant."-Bruce Ohlson.

  88. #88
    On wuss patrol
    Reputation: Glide the Clyde's Avatar
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    It's in my sig.
    Sometimes, you need to go fast enough that the trail is a blur to find clarity. -- Wild Bill

  89. #89
    RHRF!
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    "Singletrack should never be straight." - Anonymous

    ...and my Sig...
    "The secret of joy is the mastery of pain." (Anaïs Nin)

  90. #90
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    "This is the last climb" is something I've learned that is not appreciated by anyone. Especially, when you follow it with " Oh, I forgot about this climb" as you start up the next climb

  91. #91
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    The dope tests came back. They found traces of Viagra. It helps me ride long and hard, and I don't need a kickstand.

    Robin Williams, start of the 2002 San Francisco Grand Prix

  92. #92
    one sick puppy
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    I'd rather be riding my bike and thinking about God than sitting in church and thinking about riding my bike.
    Saddle up, Effendi. We ride.

  93. #93
    mtbr member
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    Didn't sound right without the story behind it.
    Last edited by OddTrickStar; 10-03-2014 at 05:56 AM.

  94. #94
    mtbr member
    Reputation: bike snob's Avatar
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    "start the ride as fast as you can and gradually increase your speed"

  95. #95
    Reluctant Tree Hugger
    Reputation: Saladin's Avatar
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    The camera takes 2 ft off the drop, 25 degrees off the angle, and 10 mph off the speed, but adds 10 lbs to the rider.
    Live like there's no tomorrow. But pay your bills just in case there is.

  96. #96
    mtbr member
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    From a sig line I remember seeing years ago on a biking forum:

    "The need to ride makes heroin addiction look like a mild craving for salt."

  97. #97
    mtbr member
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    "It doesn't get any easier, you just go faster"
    - Greg LeMond

  98. #98
    On wuss patrol
    Reputation: Glide the Clyde's Avatar
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    Pulled the trigger...
    Sometimes, you need to go fast enough that the trail is a blur to find clarity. -- Wild Bill

  99. #99
    oh my TVC 15
    Reputation: Forster's Avatar
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    One of my old riding buddies to me (circa 1994), "You know, for less than $500 you could shave almost three pounds off your mountain bike." Me to him, "You know, if you cut back on the donuts you could loose more than your bike weighs for nothing."

    Nothing makes less sense than one Clyde telling another how to weight weenie their bike. Pretty pointless.
    The most expensive bike in the world is still cheaper than the cheapest open heart surgery.

  100. #100
    Retro on Steroids
    Reputation: Repack Rider's Avatar
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    Oct 2005
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    To my riding companion when he regained consciousness after a fall that also resulted in 33 stitches to his head (he had a helmet on):

    "If I have to rip up a jersey to stop that bleeding, it's going to be yours."

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