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Thread: Sensitivity...

  1. #1
    Making fat cool since '71
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    Sensitivity...

    ...so for you squeamish types...close one eye and put one hand behind your back.

    I resisted (imagine...) using any chamois lubes for years. I recently got my err..hands...on some ASSos chamois cream and tried it twice with "good" (read: fun...sorry, acceptable) results. The drawback: price. Even at shop price it's pretty steep considering what it is...

    So, does anyone have experience using BagBalm for this sensitive useage? I mean if it's good enough for a cow's udder...it's *gotta* be good enough for a fatboy's taint, 'taint it?

    Spanku, spanku very much...

    Brock...

    PS: Happy Fesitvus for the rest of us! Feats of strength for everyone!
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  2. #2
    meatier showers
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    I want to jump in here in the worst way, but I'm not sure how...

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  3. #3
    Toby Wong?
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    all I know is that before every ride, Schralper slaps a big ol' slathering of bag balm on his whatever...just the thought of him reaching down into those lycra shorts is enough to peel paint.

    i try to remember which hand it is so if he tries to pass me anything, it's with the other hand
    lets not make it a religion, it is recreation

  4. #4
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    Just like nachos and salsa; no double dipping.

    Nachos and salsa.

    Caz (an Udderly sMOOth from TJs kind of guy)
    I am a Mountain Biker therefore I am late

  5. #5
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    Dude, you didn't have to go there

    Actually I started using Bag Balm back around 1995, with advice from our very own CCP100 creator. I've since switched to Chamois Butter. Bag Balm is great stuff, cheap at Costco (really cheap), but it's affect on the chamois and saddle is pretty bad, permenant oil residue. I would go through a set of shorts every 6-9 months and a saddle once a year. Since the switch I've been able to get 1 1/2-2 years out of shorts and no worn out saddle leather since then.

    It might have been the quantity applied with the BB vs the CB now, just remember a little dab will do ya motto... use it to protect the skin not lather it onto the chamois, use about a teaspoon amount and get down and personal with it. If you try to apply to the chamois it takes a small palm full and really doesn't do any better.

    Hope that helps,
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  6. #6
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    I can see it now: A DOD chamois lube application party.

    Oy.

    I'll pass.

    Albee

  7. #7
    Est. 1971
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    New question here.

    I have to ask this in all seriousness, partly because this is still a somewhat serious and sensitive thread and the topic was brought up while I thought of it....

    ....what exactly does the cream do? I've done 4-7 hour rides without any problems?
    -Tim B
    Larry of the Swiss Alps

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by tim_fsr
    I have to ask this in all seriousness, partly because this is still a somewhat serious and sensitive thread and the topic was brought up while I thought of it....

    ....what exactly does the cream do? I've done 4-7 hour rides without any problems?
    The harder you ride.....no wait, that doesn't make sense. It's not the motion of the ocean...no wait. Ok, do a 4-7 hour ride, then the next morning ride again and then ride again the next day etc etc. Throw a wednesnighter in there and a hot sweaty road ride and then back on the hardtail for some epic singletrack on the weekend. Oh, be sure and eat some Thai or Mexican food just to make it interesting. Do this for a couple weeks in a row and then you'll understand the importance of the nut butter. Either that or you already have a taint of steel in which case, WD-40 works well; I'd go with the 5 gallon jug from Costco.

    Caz
    I am a Mountain Biker therefore I am late

  9. #9
    Shamisen Appreciator
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    Quote Originally Posted by General Coonskins
    Dude, you didn't have to go there

    Actually I started using Bag Balm back around 1995, with advice from our very own CCP100 creator. I've since switched to Chamois Butter. Bag Balm is great stuff, cheap at Costco (really cheap), but it's affect on the chamois and saddle is pretty bad, permenant oil residue. I would go through a set of shorts every 6-9 months and a saddle once a year. Since the switch I've been able to get 1 1/2-2 years out of shorts and no worn out saddle leather since then.

    It might have been the quantity applied with the BB vs the CB now, just remember a little dab will do ya motto... use it to protect the skin not lather it onto the chamois, use about a teaspoon amount and get down and personal with it. If you try to apply to the chamois it takes a small palm full and really doesn't do any better.

    Hope that helps,
    What he said. Bag Balm seems to break down the elastic in the lycra and it definitely builds up in the chamois and on the saddle. If you don't mind paying for new shorts and saddles with relative frequency, get it. Your taint will achieve a suppleness you've never experienced before.
    Sean Chaney :: Owner/Builder :: Vertigo Cycles LLC
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  10. #10
    Daniel the Dog
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    Now this is funny

    Quote Originally Posted by Albee
    I can see it now: A DOD chamois lube application party.

    Oy.

    I'll pass.

    Albee
    Maybe Sparty would post those pics too.

    Jaybo

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by cazloco
    The harder you ride.....no wait, that doesn't make sense. It's not the motion of the ocean...no wait. Ok, do a 4-7 hour ride, then the next morning ride again and then ride again the next day etc etc. Throw a wednesnighter in there and a hot sweaty road ride and then back on the hardtail for some epic singletrack on the weekend. Oh, be sure and eat some Thai or Mexican food just to make it interesting. Do this for a couple weeks in a row and then you'll understand the importance of the nut butter. Either that or you already have a taint of steel in which case, WD-40 works well; I'd go with the 5 gallon jug from Costco.

    Caz

    For sure! A couple of years ago I did a 5 day 200+ mile ride in Mexico just north of the Copper Canyon area. Longest day at 64 miles. By the 5th day saddle contact could not be maintained for more than 5-10 minutes before the agony forced an extended bout of standing pedaling. 3 days of no riding were required before even the thought of getting on the bike didn't produce a shudder of fear.

  12. #12
    meatier showers
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    Quote Originally Posted by Albee
    I can see it now: A DOD chamois lube application party.

    Oy.

    I'll pass.

    Albee

    Yo, Albee,

    Any wimmins invited to yer taint paintin' party?

    Could be good... so long as Gaybo fails to show up (as usual...)

    --Sparty
    disciplesofdirt.org
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    you wanted to be.

    Quote Originally Posted by riverrat
    Jaybo... quit *****ing and move to Texas

  13. #13
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    Trivia Time

    Little bag balm/udder butter trivia for all y'all....of course I'd be insulting your intelligenitalias if I assumed you didn't know that it's used on cow boobs to keep them soft and supple from the abuse of the milking machines. But did you also know that the bag balm helps the "teet" squirt out from under the cow's hoof when she stands up and accidently steps on her udders? Can you imagine the pain? Oh yeah, it's ok to ingest bag balm.

    Caz

    P.S. Gonna be a long "winter". Jaybo's already put his bike up in the attic and he's done riding until June. That means he'll be lurking/trolling the forums trying to come up with creative ways to make those of us still riding feel insecure about our sexuality which I assume makes him feel better about himself. Good luck with that! I think from here on out, DOD should include one gratuitous Gaybo photo in their photo threads to give him something to do until June.
    I am a Mountain Biker therefore I am late

  14. #14
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    'm gonna refrain from tainting this thread with my lame-o attempts at humor.

    The version I'm using I found at Coastal Farm Supply. The name of it is udder balm and it is lighter in consistency than Bag Balm. Unknown is whether it affects saddles/short chamois like Bag Balm does. My testing of it is now only about six months along. I don't use it unless I know the ride will be over three hours in duration.

  15. #15
    Daniel the Dog
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    I'm confused

    Quote Originally Posted by cazloco
    Little bag balm/udder butter trivia for all y'all....of course I'd be insulting your intelligenitalias if I assumed you didn't know that it's used on cow boobs to keep them soft and supple from the abuse of the milking machines. But did you also know that the bag balm helps the "teet" squirt out from under the cow's hoof when she stands up and accidently steps on her udders? Can you imagine the pain? Oh yeah, it's ok to ingest bag balm.

    Caz

    P.S. Gonna be a long "winter". Jaybo's already put his bike up in the attic and he's done riding until June. That means he'll be lurking/trolling the forums trying to come up with creative ways to make those of us still riding feel insecure about our sexuality which I assume makes him feel better about himself. Good luck with that! I think from here on out, DOD should include one gratuitous Gaybo photo in their photo threads to give him something to do until June.
    I've seen you ride. I'm not sure if you were riding or crawling. Talk about Ghey.

    Jaybo

  16. #16
    Daniel the Dog
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    Oh, it makes you a man to ride in the rain on a SS bike

    I was kidding! I wish I could get out more but I have other interests and responsibilies. Life happens and I am not riding in the pouring rain. You enjoy go for it. By the way, I have seen your ride

    Jaybo

  17. #17
    Daniel the Dog
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    I won't show up

    Quote Originally Posted by Sparticus
    Yo, Albee,

    Any wimmins invited to yer taint paintin' party?

    Could be good... so long as Gaybo fails to show up (as usual...)

    --Sparty
    I hated Mountain Bike Oregon. The area sucks! Just kidding. I loved it down there but I ain't into big social groups. Besides, everytime I share an opinion what of you putz blasts my tail. I have SS & rigid bikes except to go to the store to get a movie. Sorry, I know that ticks you off but deal with it. By they way, why the heck do you care? Sparty, how old are you?

    Jaybo

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sparticus
    Yo, Albee,

    Any wimmins invited to yer taint paintin' party?
    If the ladies are there, then I'd HAVE to be there. After all, I have the applicator...

    As to all the venom this thread has spawned, it brings to mind the (paraphrased) words of the great philosopher Rodney King: Can't our taints all just get along?!?

  19. #19
    Making fat cool since '71
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    Funny,

    Quote Originally Posted by Albee
    If the ladies are there, then I'd HAVE to be there. After all, I have the applicator...

    As to all the venom this thread has spawned, it brings to mind the (paraphrased) words of the great philosopher Rodney King: Can't our taints all just get along?!?
    ...I now have a perversion of the song lyrics: " bang a gong" going on in my head now.

    Brock...
    Are the wheels roundish? Ride it.

    Disciples Of Dirt, come ride with us.

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaybo
    Besides, everytime I share an opinion what [one] of you putz blasts my tail.
    Jaybo
    We're just kidding, too.

    Caz
    I am a Mountain Biker therefore I am late

  21. #21
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    I have found that the Chamois Cream is really a thick form of skin Cream, which there countless brands. TJ has a no scent one. But when things get ruff down there I get the A+D Cream for diaper rash, heals the tang quick. What did Lance use?

  22. #22
    mudnthebloodnthebeer
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bobcanride

    What did Lance use?
    Now there's a loaded question for you.......
    Also, the streets are full of horizontal dropouts...

    BSNYC

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bobcanride
    What did Lance use?

    I don't know but Bonds and Jones use flax seed oil. badda-bing!

    Caz
    I am a Mountain Biker therefore I am late

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by quaffimodo
    Now there's a loaded question for you.......


    Lance used Desitin, definitely Desitin...
    MaxSteel

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