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  1. #1
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Wrongful Arrest Warrant, HELP!

    Any Police officers here?

    I was pulled over for rolling though a stop sign here in Colorado.
    Stupid, oh well. No big deal.

    But the MP here on post said I had an Arrest Warrant in Georgia for Assaulting a Police Officer.

    I am from Georgia but the allegation is completely false, when I was stationed in Georgia, I was an MP for crying out loud. I have never committed a crime.

    How do I clear this up without getting locked up for a week before the Police figure out they "got the wrong guy"?

  2. #2
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    Hello???

    Contact people in higher places... the ones you used to work with.

  3. #3
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Military Police does not = civilian law enforcement. We were a Detainee Operations Unit. I dont have any of my old contacts from Georgia police.

  4. #4
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    I mean, does this kind of thing happen? They said they looked it up by my Drivers license number. I've had that number for 8 years.

  5. #5
    AZ
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    How are you not in custody if you have a warrant outstanding?

  6. #6
    dru
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    How are you posting on the net if you are under arrest? Or do they expect you to surrender? Why didn't the cop who caught you for the stop sign take you to jail?

    Drew
    occasional cyclist

  7. #7
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Because its a "non extraditable warrant" I live in colorado now.

    They let me go, and told me to look into it. I just dont know how to go about that.

  8. #8
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Its just bull**** and completely false. I cant get caught up in this bull****, I'm an important guy at my job. If end up having to go to jail before it gets cleared up, I am sueing the **** out of the state. Believe that.

  9. #9
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    What base you on in Colorado? I got a freind thats an MP on a base in colorado. colorado springs maybe? Not sure which one. But I can call him tomorrow. He's like a boss or something. Been in 15 years or so. PM if you want it to be more private. He's a good dude.

  10. #10
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Yes. Fort Carson. PM Sent.

  11. #11
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    Ill call him first thing in morning. ( I know he's gaming right now...dont dare mess with his guild war game) PM your # to me in the morning or now or whatever and ill get you two in contact. If its not exradtion warrant....they wont come get you in CO for it....they will try when you come to GA. So you got time. Lawyer is never a bad idea. For the prosecutor to issue a warrant. a complaint was filed. copes responded. Prosecutor says yes...I got a shot at this. So they have something. Judges dont sign warrants willy nilly....usually..lol

    Your gonna be cool. Imma try and help if I can. But I do advise talk to a lawyer. Can you tell your CO?

  12. #12
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    Did they say it was a felony charge?

  13. #13
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    So let me get this straight. A guy with a name like Fast Banana may end up in the slammer. You best get some legal council like ASAP to avoid this. The boys are going to take a liking to you.
    Progress: Just because we have always done it that way is no reason to keep doing it that way.

  14. #14
    AZ
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    Fast banana, check your PM's.

  15. #15
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Yes, Felony Assault on an Officer.

    I can take it to my CO. I will go to Legal on post as well to get a lawyer.

  16. #16
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    I just facebooked him for you. PM'd you his facebook so you know im totally legit.

  17. #17
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    Hes got your number now. Ill keep on him till he calls you. Totally cool guy.

  18. #18
    9 lives
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    love your handle FastBanana

    I have no advice just wanted to wish you well

    .
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  19. #19
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Quote Originally Posted by Highlux View Post
    Hes got your number now. Ill keep on him till he calls you. Totally cool guy.
    Thanks!

  20. #20
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    love your handle FastBanana

    I have no advice just wanted to wish you well

    .
    My handle?

  21. #21
    AZ
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    Quote Originally Posted by FastBanana View Post
    My handle?


    User name.

  22. #22
    007
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    Something similar happened to me oddly, though not quite as significant a crime.

    I have an incredibly common last name, though a not so common first name . . . absurdly random: there is another person with the same first, middle and last name, born on the same friggin' day. I am NOT kidding. Major difference: one of us is black.

    However, this imposter engages in some pretty unscrupulous behavior, which came up when I applied for my professional license and was "denied due to felonious behavior." Anyway, it was pretty easy to clear up the licensing issue . . . but separating his criminal record was far more difficult. I had to go through LexisNexis to do it, as they were the primary repository for personal records.
    Alcohol may lead nowhere, but it sure is the scenic route!

  23. #23
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    Wrongful Arrest Warrant, HELP!

    Wise move. Ask the Internet. I would avoid traveling through Georgia. Maybe you had your identity stolen.

    Good luck, banana.

  24. #24
    gobsmacked Moderator
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    Wrongful Arrest Warrant, HELP!

    Quote Originally Posted by 007 View Post
    Something similar happened to me oddly, though not quite as significant a crime.

    I have an incredibly common last name, though a not so common first name . . . absurdly random: there is another person with the same first, middle and last name, born on the same friggin' day. I am NOT kidding. Major difference: one of us is black.

    However, this imposter engages in some pretty unscrupulous behavior, which came up when I applied for my professional license and was "denied due to felonious behavior." Anyway, it was pretty easy to clear up the licensing issue . . . but separating his criminal record was far more difficult. I had to go through LexisNexis to do it, as they were the primary repository for personal records.
    That's crazy!!! Hell of a coincidence!

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by 007 View Post
    Something similar happened to me oddly, though not quite as significant a crime.

    I have an incredibly common last name, though a not so common first name . . . absurdly random: there is another person with the same first, middle and last name, born on the same friggin' day. I am NOT kidding. Major difference: one of us is black.

    However, this imposter engages in some pretty unscrupulous behavior, which came up when I applied for my professional license and was "denied due to felonious behavior." Anyway, it was pretty easy to clear up the licensing issue . . . but separating his criminal record was far more difficult. I had to go through LexisNexis to do it, as they were the primary repository for personal records.
    You mean I could have turned you in for a reward???! Darn!

  26. #26
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    Yeah - in the big house - Fast Banana will likely be a popular dance card.
    Don't believe all you've been told, currently the NDR (National Driver Register) is wreaking havoc on many by states hungry to collect revenues from past offenses, whether settled, or not.
    If summoned, one is found guilty until proven innocent, and often the result is to pay an administrative fee (+/-$200).

    From what I gather, there is no date of expiration. One friend had his driving privileges suspended, for a DUI that occurred 27 years ago in another state, yet he HAD to satisfy them to retain his current driving privileges, and prove his innocence.
    To add Insult to injury - he is currently a LEO.

  27. #27
    007
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    Quote Originally Posted by girlonbike View Post
    That's crazy!!! Hell of a coincidence!
    Tell me about it . . . because I now know this person is out there, I have a credit monitoring service that also keeps tabs on my public record. I hate paying for it, but if anything comes up again, they cover the correction expenses and given that chances are good it will come up again, I might as well keep it.
    Alcohol may lead nowhere, but it sure is the scenic route!

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by 007 View Post
    Something similar happened to me oddly, though not quite as significant a crime.

    I have an incredibly common last name, though a not so common first name . . . absurdly random: there is another person with the same first, middle and last name, born on the same friggin' day. I am NOT kidding. Major difference: one of us is black.

    However, this imposter engages in some pretty unscrupulous behavior, which came up when I applied for my professional license and was "denied due to felonious behavior." Anyway, it was pretty easy to clear up the licensing issue . . . but separating his criminal record was far more difficult. I had to go through LexisNexis to do it, as they were the primary repository for personal records.
    Weird, I assumed you were white - damn me and my MTB stereotypes
    Honestly... ahh I give up

  29. #29
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    love your handle FastBanana

    I have no advice just wanted to wish you well
    Lo
    .
    Awe man Cycleicious this would have gone perfect with my above post. I don't know how you come up with some of this stuff. I guess I'm one to talk my handle / user name wouldn't go over so well in prison either.

    Fast Banana sorry about joking on your user name but I couldn't help but see the irony if you ended up in prison. I hope you figure this out and get it straightened up.
    Progress: Just because we have always done it that way is no reason to keep doing it that way.

  30. #30
    The Boat or The Bike?
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    Quote Originally Posted by highdelll View Post
    Weird, I assumed you were white - damn me and my MTB stereotypes
    I was thinking the same thing!!
    Live to Fish, now Love to Ride

  31. #31
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    I'm sure it will straighten out just fine.

    I know it recently hit the system, as I had a background check come up clear last month. And I haven't been in Georgia in over a year.

    There are a couple people running around with my name. I'll be calling GBI later, and today I am going to go get a military lawyer. I'm pretty pissed at this point.

  32. #32
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    Talk to your CO and then go to JAG and let JAG clear it up for you.
    It probably won't take long. As far as getting arrested, you don't have to worry about it. If you were not arrested on the spot because they can't extradite you, they won't come get you. You would only need to worry about it if you go back to Ga but still get it cleared up ASAP even ig you have no intentions of ever going back.

    Just out of curiosity which base were you at?
    My dad was the CO of the JAG office at both Benning and Hunter AAF.
    Long retired now so he can't really help.
    Just stick it in granny and start grinding.

  33. #33
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    I'm out at Fort Carson. It just sucks cuz this is gonna take tome out of my day to work with JAG. Sucks. Thanks for the input

    Sent from my EVO using Tapatalk

  34. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by FastBanana View Post
    I'm out at Fort Carson. It just sucks cuz this is gonna take tome out of my day to work with JAG. Sucks. Thanks for the input

    Sent from my EVO using Tapatalk
    Seems to me it's time worth spending to clear your name, if that indeed is your name, Fastbanana. How many Fastbananas can there be? Hmmm....
    Puff Tijuana Smalls
    Shake hands with Beef...

  35. #35
    No unpermitted erections
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    Easy. Ride your bike.

    A really, really long ways away.

  36. #36
    meow meow
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    law advice on mtbr. who knew?

  37. #37
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    From one fast banana to another be sure to take all advicei given n the O.C. as word. And if you are sentenced to the big house be sure to change your name. Something like Buck would work.
    Progress: Just because we have always done it that way is no reason to keep doing it that way.

  38. #38
    High Desert MTBer
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    Quote Originally Posted by 007 View Post
    Something similar happened to me oddly, though not quite as significant a crime.

    I have an incredibly common last name, though a not so common first name . . . absurdly random: there is another person with the same first, middle and last name, born on the same friggin' day. I am NOT kidding. Major difference: one of us is black.

    However, this imposter engages in some pretty unscrupulous behavior, which came up when I applied for my professional license and was "denied due to felonious behavior." Anyway, it was pretty easy to clear up the licensing issue . . . but separating his criminal record was far more difficult. I had to go through LexisNexis to do it, as they were the primary repository for personal records.
    Obvious which one is black, the only other 007s I know are definitely white... The name is pretty common, I know at least 8...
    List Of All James Bond Actors - Page 8 of 8
    It's all Here. Now.

  39. #39
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post
    Obvious which one is black, the only other 007s I know are definitely white... The name is pretty common, I know at least 8...
    List Of All James Bond Actors - Page 8 of 8
    Well it's quite obvious 007 is a spy. How do we know that our 007 isn't the impostor. Because he said so. Scary thought knowing he's been amongst us all this time.
    Progress: Just because we have always done it that way is no reason to keep doing it that way.

  40. #40
    Rogue Exterminator
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    Quote Originally Posted by FastBanana View Post
    I'm out at Fort Carson.
    No, where WERE you at? As in Georgia.

    Anyways, it shouldn't take too long at JAG.
    Call them up, set the appointment and go. It shouldn't be during your personal time anyways. Most of JAG works during normal business hours.
    Just stick it in granny and start grinding.

  41. #41
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    Business hours is what gets me. I was in Dahlonega

    Sent from my EVO using Tapatalk

  42. #42
    gobsmacked Moderator
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    Quote Originally Posted by b-kul View Post
    law advice on mtbr. who knew?
    Ya, it's gotta be good, right?

    DJ, Buck is a fantastic prison name. I dig it. OOO! How about Dirk Diggler?

  43. #43
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    Better prison names for Fast Banana...

    Buck
    Butch
    Dirt Diggler
    Slider
    Slick
    Slam
    Potato
    Cranky
    Mounds Bar
    Tootsie Roll
    Soap Smuggler
    Scrappy

    Did I miss any........


    Fast Banana if you do get sent to the Big House here is a list of 50 slang words and their definitions to make you sound tougher than you really are.
    1. All Day: A life sentence, as in “I’m doin' all day.”

    2. All Day and a Night: Life without parole.

    3. Back door parole: To die in prison.

    4. Beef: 1. A criminal charge, as in “I caught a burglary beef in Philly.” 2. A problem with another convict, as in “I have a beef with that guy in Block D.”

    5. Brake fluid: Psychiatric meds.

    6. Bug: A prison staff member considered untrustworthy or unreliable.

    7. Bug juice: Intoxicants or depressant drugs.

    8. Buck Rogers Time: (early to mid 20th century) A parole or release date so far away that it's difficult to imagine.

    9. Bum Beef: A false accusation/charge or wrongful conviction.

    10. Cadillac: An inmate’s bunk. Also, Cadillac Job, an easy or enjoyable inmate work assignment.

    11. Catch a ride: A request to a friend to get you high.

    12. Cell Warrior: An inmate that puts on a tough front or runs their mouth when locked in their cell, but is submissive or cowardly when interacting with other prisoners in the open.

    13. Chin Check: To punch another inmate in the jaw to see if he'll fight back.

    14. Cowboy: A new correctional officer. Cowboy spelled backwards, is yobwoc, or a “young, obnoxious, bastard we often con.”

    15. Dance on the blacktop: To get stabbed.

    16. Diesel Therapy: A lengthy bus trip or transfer to a far away facility, or even an incorrect destination, used as punishment or to get rid of troublesome inmates.

    17. Ding Wing: A prison’s psychiatric unit.

    18. Dipping in the Kool Aid: Attempting to enter a conversation the person has no place in or is not welcome in.

    19. Doing the Dutch Or the “Dutch Act,” to commit suicide.

    20. Dry Snitching: To inform on another inmate indirectly by talking loudly about their actions or behaving suspiciously in front of correctional officers; supply general information to officers without naming names.

    21. Duck: A correctional officer who reveals information about other officers or prison staff to inmates.

    22. Fire on the Line: A warning—“correctional officer in the area.”

    23. Ghetto Penthouse: The top tier of a cell block.

    24. Four piece or four-piece suit: A full set of restraints, composed of handcuffs, leg irons and waist chain, and security boxes to cover the restraints’ key holes.

    25. Grandma’s: Or Grandma’s House, a prison gang’s headquarters or meeting place, or the cell of the gang leader.

    26. Heat Wave: The attention brought to a group of inmates by the action of one or a few, as in “Joe and John got caught with contraband, and now the whole tier is going through a heat wave.”

    27. Hold your mud: To resist informing or snitching even under threat of punishment or violence.

    28. I got jigs: To keep look out or watch for officers, as in “I got jigs while you make that shank.”

    29. In the car: In on a deal or a plan.

    30. Jacket: 1. An inmate’s information file or rap sheet. 2. An inmate’s reputation among other prisoners.

    31. Jack Mack: Canned mackerel or other fish available from the prison commissary. Can be used as currency with other inmates or placed in a sock and used as a weapon.

    32. Jackrabbit Parole: To escape from a facility.

    33. Juice Card: An inmate’s influence with guards or other prisoners. “He should have gone to the hole for that, but he’s got a juice card with one of the guards.”

    34. Keister: To hide contraband in one’s rectum. Also known as “taking it to the hoop,” “putting it in the safe”and “packing the rabbit.”

    35. Kite: A contraband letter.

    36. Monkey Mouth: A prisoner who goes on and on about nothing.

    37. Monster: HIV. Also known as “the Ninja.”

    38. Ninja Turtles: Guards dressed in full riot gear. Also known as “hats and bats.”

    39. No Smoke: To follow staff’s orders without resisting or causing any problems, as in “He let the guards search his cell, no smoke.”

    40. On the Bumper: Trying to get “in the car.”

    41. On the River: Time spent at the Louisiana State Penitentiary, which is surrounded on three sides by the Mississippi River. As in, “He did 20 years on the river.”

    42. Peels: The orange jumpsuit uniforms worn by prisoners in some facilities.

    43. Prison Wolf: An inmate who is normally straight on “the outside,” but engages in sexual activity with men while incarcerated.

    44. Rabbit: An inmate who has a history of escape attempts or has plans to try to escape.

    45. Ride with: To do favors for a fellow convict, often including sexual ones, in exchange for protection, contraband, prison currency, or commissary items.

    46. Ride Leg: To be friendly with or suck up to staff in order to get favors.

    47. Road Kill: Cigarette butts picked up from roadsides by prison work crew. They’re brought back to the facility and the collected tobacco is rerolled with toilet paper to smoke.

    48. Stainless Steel Ride: Death by lethal injection.

    49. Three Knee Deep: To stab someone so that they’re injured, but not killed, usually as a warning.

    50. Wolf Tickets: To talk tough or challenge others, without any intent to back it up with action or violence, as in “He’s just selling wolf tickets.”


    Read the full text here: 50 Prison Slang Words To Make You Sound Like a Tough Guy | Mental Floss
    --brought to you by mental_floss!
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Wrongful Arrest Warrant, HELP!-orange.jpg  

    Progress: Just because we have always done it that way is no reason to keep doing it that way.

  44. #44
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    Don't **** around with Georgia, they are hardcore about prison and punitive penalties.
    I hate to even ask but whats your race, age and all that jazz? If you are a young to middle aged white male you need to get a good lawyer asap. The lawyer will cost you but not as much as the state will hit you for. They will also try to give you some insane prison sentence as well. If you are a black male just stick with any ol' lawyer as they will just give you probation. If you are an illegal immigrant just don't show up. If you are anything else you are gonna be fine. Just be polite and they let you off scott free.

    Good luck!

  45. #45
    Rogue Exterminator
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    Dude, GA is not that damn bad.
    Besides, he is military and the JAG office will provide a lawyer for him.
    Been in the same shoes as him in GA myself and it was cleared up quite easily.
    And for the record, I am a white male.
    Just stick it in granny and start grinding.

  46. #46
    The Fastest of Bananas
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    For those who wonder, I am white, 24, Educated, no criminal record, and am a "professional"

    Never got the chance today to go look into this, work was nuts. I think it'll be a friday task.

  47. #47
    Meatbomb
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    I was born a poor black child.

  48. #48
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    Quote Originally Posted by Phillbo View Post
    I was born a poor black child.
    His story here: Down, in the Mississippi... :-P - YouTube
    Progress: Just because we have always done it that way is no reason to keep doing it that way.

  49. #49
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    Wrongful Arrest Warrant, HELP!

    Quote Originally Posted by FastBanana View Post
    Never got the chance today to go look into this, work was nuts. I think it'll be a friday task.
    No need to hurry. I'm sure this matter will clear itself up.

  50. #50
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    <<<<<<< That's one fast banana

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