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  1. #1
    meh... whatever
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    Tin-Foil Hatters

    who ya got???

    taking tin-foil hats to a whole new level...

    paul walker killed by the illuminati

    but wait... it gets better.

    paul walker killed by obama drone strike

    no, it's not "the onion". yes, they are stone cold serious.

    the comments following each "story" are hilarious.

    like this one for example:

    Just a thought… If you watch the Brian dying clip of Family Guy… there is a clear #18 made buy the goal and the hockey stick in the road. Consider this…

    Paul Walker is 40
    He died on 11/30th.
    40
    30
    cancel the zeros
    4+3=7
    7+11 (November)=18
    1+8=9
    1+1+3+4=9

    Also 1134 upside down is hell. This very well could have been a satanic sacrifice. I don’t buy the accident story.
    "Knowledge is good." ~ Emil Faber

  2. #2
    AZ
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    Just goes to show that the 29er forum doesn't have a monopoly on bat shit crazy.

  3. #3
    Terrain Sculptor
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    Welcome back AZ.

    There are arguments going on that Paul Walker's death is a hoax like Jackie Chan's death.
    "I saw it on ABC, CBS, NBC, FOX, CNN. Paul Walker must be dead."
    "No, he's alive! I saw it on a Spanish news website."

    If Jackie Chan does die, NOBODY is going to believe it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja's Son
    You may be happy to hear that my dad has kicked cancer's ass. Now he's looking for whoever sent it.

  4. #4
    Killer b.
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    Dang, that was some fun reading.

    Apparently Obama is the antichrist and he is going to have the UN kill all American citizens who don't willingly hand over all their guns, and then he's going to nuke the whole place and Jesus is going to turn up with Paul Walker and.... Oh wait... No, there was going to be an electro magnetic pulse that would start a zombie apocalypse, so start hoarding now, and Glen Beck broke the whole story several years ago, but some comet or other that is towing aliens in it's wake is being covered up by the illuminati who know that power companies don't want you to hear the truth about cancer, which would be a big problem if the Obeastma of Revelation wasn't about to kick off the apocralypse causing widespread..... ohhhh I think I read too much.

    Maybe I'll just go mountain biking instead of worrying about it all.
    Posting on the basis that ignorance shared is ignorance doubled.

  5. #5
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    2013 SC Tallboy C
    2011 Niner EMD9

  6. #6
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    Was a sad day and lots of people are crazy with their theories

  7. #7
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    ^ I have a theory about that....

  8. #8
    Terrain Sculptor
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    ^ That's crazy.
    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja's Son
    You may be happy to hear that my dad has kicked cancer's ass. Now he's looking for whoever sent it.

  9. #9
    ****** to the dirt
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    I am safe I got my hat on.
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
    There's some strange folk out there 'bouts. They have no sense of humor.
    My Blog

  10. #10
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    Tin-Foil Hatters

    The drone strike deal seems reasonable


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja View Post
    Welcome back AZ.

    There are arguments going on that Paul Walker's death is a hoax like Jackie Chan's death.
    "I saw it on ABC, CBS, NBC, FOX, CNN. Paul Walker must be dead."
    "No, he's alive! I saw it on a Spanish news website."

    If Jackie Chan does die, NOBODY is going to believe it.
    That may be, but EVERYBODY knows that Bruce Lee was killed by the Dim Mak (Death-touch)!

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Understater View Post
    Dang, that was some fun reading.

    Apparently Obama is the antichrist and he is going to have the UN kill all American citizens who don't willingly hand over all their guns, and then he's going to nuke the whole place and Jesus is going to turn up with Paul Walker and.... Oh wait... No, there was going to be an electro magnetic pulse that would start a zombie apocalypse, so start hoarding now, and Glen Beck broke the whole story several years ago, but some comet or other that is towing aliens in it's wake is being covered up by the illuminati who know that power companies don't want you to hear the truth about cancer, which would be a big problem if the Obeastma of Revelation wasn't about to kick off the apocralypse causing widespread..... ohhhh I think I read too much.

    Maybe I'll just go mountain biking instead of worrying about it all.
    This is why there is a barcode on the back of every Stop sign. The U.N. troops can scan it, and instantly find out how many guns are in the neighborhood. Some of the barcodes even have a tiny little black helicopter icon on them.

  13. #13
    Killer b.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Old Ray View Post
    This is why there is a barcode on the back of every Stop sign. The U.N. troops can scan it, and instantly find out how many guns are in the neighborhood. Some of the barcodes even have a tiny little black helicopter icon on them.
    I'm guessing in a lot of neighborhoods the answer to that would be "more guns than us.... And bigger too." Man, the UN is so old school. I thought everyone was using data-matrices now.
    Posting on the basis that ignorance shared is ignorance doubled.

  14. #14
    Afric Pepperbird
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    A chemical analysis of my poop reveals a little-known toxin, available only to scientists working for the NIH, OSRD, and other top-level US guv'mint agencies.

  15. #15
    Meatbomb
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    Death by deceleration...I'm pretty sure that is what will get me.

  16. #16
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    Tin-Foil Hatters

    Does anybody ride by kernville and lake Isabella? Great riding out there and where this guy that made Morningstar tools lived and sold his stuff at the annual keyesville bike race. Wacky!

    http://reviews.mtbr.com/toolmaker-pa...alifornia-home

  17. #17
    Unpredictable
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ View Post
    Just goes to show that the 29er forum doesn't have a monopoly on bat shit crazy.
    Ken Awseome

  18. #18
    Unpredictable
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    Quote Originally Posted by dirt farmer View Post
    A chemical analysis of my poop reveals a little-known toxin, available only to scientists working for the NIH, OSRD, and other top-level US guv'mint agencies.
    I hope that toxin is not an isotope of Spandexium, Lycromium or Fagnesium

  19. #19
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    I love tin foil hats

  20. #20
    I didn't do it
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    Waterfowl. Don't trust 'em with those beady, dark, soulless eyes. They're up to something I tell ya.
    Let's eat Ted
    Let's eat, Ted
    Remember, commas save lives

  21. #21
    ...but I'm a Silly Hunter
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    I will investigate this.
    I like Sand - I don't like Witches


  22. #22
    High Desert MTBer
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    I have a friend who is a retired US Air Force Colonel who was involved in some very hush-hush stuff over the years... I am working on some explanations of the Roswell saga, and shall report back with info when I get it... Watch this space...
    It's all Here. Now.

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post
    I have a friend who is a retired US Air Force Colonel who was involved in some very hush-hush stuff over the years... I am working on some explanations of the Roswell saga, and shall report back with info when I get it... Watch this space...
    Just as I thought, my worst fears have been confirmed:

    My USAAF buddy has confirmed that the 'ship' that came down over Roswell contained the bodies of 2 adult alien waterfowl, and upon closer examination, it was found that one of the pair had recently given birth to several babies, but they were not found. It was assumed that these alien aqua-avians had escaped upon a mission of Earth conquest. The other oddity discovered with the 2 adults was that they both exhibited, as closely as could be ascertained, female characteristics, and it was also assumed that they were in fact gay.
    After evidence was found of a huge upsurge in waterfowl populations, and further, much suppressed, evidence was found of several bank robberies, kidnappings and anal intrusions perpetrated by groups of hostile duck-like creatures, a group was set up within the black ops framework of the CIA: The Duck Hunters... The rest is history...
    It's all Here. Now.

  24. #24
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    RockerC has too much Peyote Button available out in the desert.
    Attached Images Attached Images  
    Quote Originally Posted by targnik View Post
    So I shoot off all full of bravado, hit this wee booter - grabbing some air, then I land - leading into a greasy rut.

  25. #25
    High Desert MTBer
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    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    RockerC has too much Peyote Button available out in the desert.
    Where'd you get that picture of me?!? I thought I had deleted all copies?!

    If you look carefully at my pants, you can make out the stylised and very fetching duck motif around my thighs... the truth is out!
    It's all Here. Now.

  26. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post
    Where'd you get that picture of me?!? I thought I had deleted all copies?!

    If you look carefully at my pants, you can make out the stylised and very fetching duck motif around my thighs... the truth is out!

    That's why I like the O.C.
    If I had posted something like that about someone in the General forum all hell would have broke out.

    We take it as well as give it in here.
    Quote Originally Posted by targnik View Post
    So I shoot off all full of bravado, hit this wee booter - grabbing some air, then I land - leading into a greasy rut.

  27. #27
    I didn't do it
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post
    Just as I thought, my worst fears have been confirmed:

    My USAAF buddy has confirmed that the 'ship' that came down over Roswell contained the bodies of 2 adult alien waterfowl, and upon closer examination, it was found that one of the pair had recently given birth to several babies, but they were not found. It was assumed that these alien aqua-avians had escaped upon a mission of Earth conquest. The other oddity discovered with the 2 adults was that they both exhibited, as closely as could be ascertained, female characteristics, and it was also assumed that they were in fact gay.
    After evidence was found of a huge upsurge in waterfowl populations, and further, much suppressed, evidence was found of several bank robberies, kidnappings and anal intrusions perpetrated by groups of hostile duck-like creatures, a group was set up within the black ops framework of the CIA: The Duck Hunters... The rest is history...
    Ah ha! I knew it. Thanks for clearing that up rocker. Quack, quack, quack, watch your back.
    Let's eat Ted
    Let's eat, Ted
    Remember, commas save lives

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sock Monkey View Post
    Real conspiracy theories are every bit as wack as that one. Take for instance:

    Obama Order To ?Destroy Duck Dynasty? Stunningly Revealed | Alternative
    I love that this website feels the need to provide for the readers definitions of the words being used in the articles.

  29. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post
    Where'd you get that picture of me?!? I thought I had deleted all copies?!

    If you look carefully at my pants, you can make out the stylised and very fetching duck motif around my thighs... the truth is out!
    you can't delete the internet, once out will always be out. especially if the NSA is involved, but they just loose it in DJ email box.
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
    There's some strange folk out there 'bouts. They have no sense of humor.
    My Blog

  30. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sock Monkey View Post
    Real conspiracy theories are every bit as wack as that one. Take for instance:

    Obama Order To ?Destroy Duck Dynasty? Stunningly Revealed | Alternative
    I see this source of 'news' has received over 400 million views... I suspect that a good number of the people reading this crap actually believe what they are reading! If true, that is incredible to me, altho I know it should not be... We can laff, but it's sad and dangerous.
    It's all Here. Now.

  31. #31
    ...but I'm a Silly Hunter
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    Even more sad if reading more than one article, the function of some words take on new meaning, as if only catering to their 'cloud' and to exploit any infrastructure in use - likely underground networks whose sole focus is infiltrating Computer Data.

    The Patriot ruse is getting tired.
    I like Sand - I don't like Witches


  32. #32
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    This just got posted in General and I just had to pull it for this thread before it gets binned!

    "Civil Rights and Severe Pain.
    The US Government and Police departments of this country are now installing devices into your body to create severe pain.

    They are installing devices into your head,mouth,shoulder,penis,vagina, once these devices are installed you automatically black out at night, they then proceed to enter your home, and install more of this crap into your body.

    They want to hear every conversation you are having and control every aspect of your life, all in effort to line their pockets with money, with disregard to your life, and your family's life.

    Help stop this atrocity by spreading the word to as many people as possible.


    Beware, the police and government are now having undercover friends drug you, put you to sleep, and install tiny microphones into your mouth and skull. Side effects may include severe pain, accidents that were not your fault.

    When you go to sleep, you black out, and the government and police break into your home and rape you, and install more of this shit into your body.

    Spread the word. Don't let new friends sleep over.

    Tell all your friends, its only a matter of time before it effects you.

    Signs that this has happen to you,

    1. severe tooth pain.
    2. your anus was loose when you woke up.
    3. your girlfriends vagina has some kind of bump in it.
    4. unexplainable pain randomly, throughout the day.
    5. stomach pain, cant crap.

    things to do to annoy the police and goverment that are listening to you through unuathorized taps into your body. (this helps kill some of these in your body and flush them out)

    1. making slirping sounds with your mouth.
    2. try to stay up for over 48 hours without going to sleep, try to take a lot of craps.
    3. monster energy drink.
    4. avoid eating out, try cooking at home.
    5. avoid shady doctors and clinics.
    6. lots of bread and crapping.
    7. after meals use a plastic toothpick to clean your teeth.
    8. boiling hot showers.



    watch what you say, some money hungry rat is listetning to everyword you say.

    The police and government are now installing tiny microscopic microchips into your mouth and body so they can listen to every word you are saying.

    Don't come to los angeles, everyone in the town is a goverment or police rat.

    Don't let strangers sleep over at your house.

    These same devices installed into your body create pain.

    It's in everything you own, you visit a doctor, he sticks it into your body.

    In the food you eat.

    In your tire ..............

    Watch out, be careful what you say and do."


    Classic!
    It's all Here. Now.

  33. #33
    check your six
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    ^ Say what????? Get it out of me!!! And here I just thought it was aliens doing this to me..
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  34. #34
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    I wonder if this has anything to do with prolonged erections?
    Let's eat Ted
    Let's eat, Ted
    Remember, commas save lives

  35. #35
    AZ
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    Speaking of tin foil, get it while you can:

    Civil Rights and Severe Pain.

  36. #36
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    I don't remember being this confused in any other thread.
    Last edited by DIRTJUNKIE; 01-17-2014 at 04:29 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by targnik View Post
    So I shoot off all full of bravado, hit this wee booter - grabbing some air, then I land - leading into a greasy rut.

  37. #37
    check your six
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    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    I don't remember being this confused in any other thread.

    Easy, it's because you have your tin foil hat on... dummy. Take it off and you will see clearly!
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  38. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by sodak View Post
    Easy, it's because you have your tin foil hat on... dummy. Take it off and you will see clearly!
    Oh! I can see clearly now, thanks.
    Quote Originally Posted by targnik View Post
    So I shoot off all full of bravado, hit this wee booter - grabbing some air, then I land - leading into a greasy rut.

  39. #39
    I didn't do it
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    I'm keeping mine on until this all blows over.
    Let's eat Ted
    Let's eat, Ted
    Remember, commas save lives

  40. #40
    check your six
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mookie View Post
    I'm keeping mine on until this all blows over.
    I seem to have misplaced mine. I may have used it last night to cook garlic bread. I better figure this out soon, can't have it off for too long you know.
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  41. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by sodak View Post
    I seem to have misplaced mine. I may have used it last night to cook garlic bread. I better figure this out soon, can't have it off for too long you know.
    Especially with all the dark forces among us. I say go get your foil and make another, having garlic hair for awhile will be worth it in the end.
    Let's eat Ted
    Let's eat, Ted
    Remember, commas save lives

  42. #42
    Rabid Lana fan
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mookie View Post
    ....having garlic hair for awhile will be worth it in the end.
    Protect him from Hawg, at the very least.
    rOCktoberfest 2015 pt I here
    rOCktoberfest 2015 pt II here

  43. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by net wurker View Post
    Protect him from Hawg, at the very least.
    Thou shall not uh.... Hahahaha!!!!!
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  44. #44
    heaven help me
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    OMG.............It's starting to spread..............it is true.

  45. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by norton55 View Post
    OMG.............It's starting to spread..............it is true.
    Here come the helicopters.
    rOCktoberfest 2015 pt I here
    rOCktoberfest 2015 pt II here

  46. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by net wurker View Post
    Here come the helicopters.
    Those aren't the ones you need to worry about. The really bad ones you can't hear, and you can't see. Watch out for them.

    Oh.......and nobody here has pointed out yet that tin foil underwear is JUST as vital as a tinfoil hat......maybe even more vital.

    I'm only telling you guys this because I know that you are all my friends....your'e not like the others.

  47. #47
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    did aliens appear again
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
    There's some strange folk out there 'bouts. They have no sense of humor.
    My Blog

  48. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by Old Ray View Post

    Oh.......and nobody here has pointed out yet that tin foil underwear is JUST as vital as a tinfoil hat......maybe even more vital.

    Only protection from the dreaded... SPOTTED DICK!!!
    It's all Here. Now.

  49. #49
    meh... whatever
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mookie View Post
    Especially with all the dark forces among us. I say go get your foil and make another, having garlic hair for awhile will be worth it in the end.
    not to mention the added bonus of being vampire proof.
    "Knowledge is good." ~ Emil Faber

  50. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ View Post
    Speaking of tin foil, get it while you can:

    Civil Rights and Severe Pain.
    Sorry I killed that and banned the user. Serious WTF there though. still in recycle bin for your reading enjoyment.
    Try this: HTFU

  51. #51
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    Well, I think that thread just now got locked right when I was about half way through it. Oh well, some threads are just too easy.

  52. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by monogod View Post
    not to mention the added bonus of being vampire proof.
    Killing two birds with one stone.
    Let's eat Ted
    Let's eat, Ted
    Remember, commas save lives

  53. #53
    meh... whatever
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    Quote Originally Posted by Old Ray View Post
    tin foil underwear is JUST as vital as a tinfoil hat......maybe even more vital.
    Tin-Foil Hatters-cup-test-ball-shock.w654.jpg
    "Knowledge is good." ~ Emil Faber

  54. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by Slow Danger View Post
    Well, I think that thread just now got locked right when I was about half way through it. Oh well, some threads are just too easy.
    Aw shucks, that was a good one. Have to admit it was like shooting fish in a barrel with a concealed weapon.
    Let's eat Ted
    Let's eat, Ted
    Remember, commas save lives

  55. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post
    Only protection from the dreaded... SPOTTED DICK!!!
    Exactly. This is also directly relates to the fact that I only drink distilled water and pure grain alcohol.

  56. #56
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockcrusher View Post
    Sorry I killed that and banned the user. Serious WTF there though. still in recycle bin for your reading enjoyment.
    So now we know which side of the aisle YOUR'E on!

  57. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockcrusher View Post
    Sorry I killed that and banned the user. Serious WTF there though. still in recycle bin for your reading enjoyment.
    Good thing I had the foresight to copy and paste it above huh?!?
    It's all Here. Now.

  58. #58
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    "Back in the Day" I remember the tin foil hat crowd claiming that Bush caused the tsunami (the SE Asia/Indonesia tsunami) by detonating nuclear weapons on oceanic fault lines. He apparently did it to benefit "big oil" or to distract from the Iraq war . . . or something.

    One of my old LPO's in the Navy believed that the Chinese were using gays to subvert America. To what end he would not say. The statement would have been less hilarious if it wasn't so nearly identical to the Illinois Nazis in the Blues Brothers: "The Jew is using the Black to BRING YOU DOWN!"

    Lots of tinfoil hat theories are generally accepted in culture however. The "grassy knoll JFK shooter." 911 truthers. Obama birth certificate truthers. Roswell NM in general. The "government faked the moon landing" people. People who believe politicians can change the weather.

    Less accepted but still frequently encountered: the "Jet trails are government chemical" people.

    I'd also like to point out that I personally know people who believe in their hearts that the Cleveland Browns will someday make the playoffs. Madness.
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    Quote Originally Posted by B-Mac View Post
    "Back in the Day" I remember the tin foil hat crowd claiming that Bush caused the tsunami (the SE Asia/Indonesia tsunami) by detonating nuclear weapons on oceanic fault lines. He apparently did it to benefit "big oil" or to distract from the Iraq war . . . or something.

    One of my old LPO's in the Navy believed that the Chinese were using gays to subvert America. To what end he would not say. The statement would have been less hilarious if it wasn't so nearly identical to the Illinois Nazis in the Blues Brothers: "The Jew is using the Black to BRING YOU DOWN!"

    Lots of tinfoil hat theories are generally accepted in culture however. The "grassy knoll JFK shooter." 911 truthers. Obama birth certificate truthers. Roswell NM in general. The "government faked the moon landing" people. People who believe politicians can change the weather.

    Less accepted but still frequently encountered: the "Jet trails are government chemical" people.

    I'd also like to point out that I personally know people who believe in their hearts that the Cleveland Browns will someday make the playoffs. Madness.
    Well, I know their counterparts in San Diego, who argue that the Chargers simply making the playoffs justifies leaving the crumbling bridges, potholes, and sidewalks of the city alone and diverting ALL funds to a fancy new waterfront stadium.

    Madness indeed. That's the ticket.

  60. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by Old Ray View Post
    Well, I know their counterparts in San Diego, who argue that the Chargers simply making the playoffs justifies leaving the crumbling bridges, potholes, and sidewalks of the city alone and diverting ALL funds to a fancy new waterfront stadium.

    Madness indeed. That's the ticket.
    I was under the impression that the san diego stadium wasn't going to happen. In fact the lack of a new stadium may lead to the Chargers moving to LA?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mookie View Post
    I was under the impression that the san diego stadium wasn't going to happen. In fact the lack of a new stadium may lead to the Chargers moving to LA?
    They're always trying to figure out a way to give welfare to our local billionaires' in San Diego, so the idea of handing the Spanos family a shiny new stadium on a silver platter is never too far off the table here.

    Plus, it seems like the citizenry here is putty in the local medias' hands.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Old Ray View Post
    They're always trying to figure out a way to give welfare to our local billionaires' in San Diego, so the idea of handing the Spanos family a shiny new stadium on a silver platter is never too far off the table here.

    Plus, it seems like the citizenry here is putty in the local medias' hands.
    I'm a big sports fan but I agree, never supported tax payer subsidized stadiums. I think the various leagues can help out through some sort of building fund, not to mention the billionaire's own money. The NFL in particular is flush with cash and given that the league has a strategic plan on which cities have teams it always seemed logical to me that they could actually fund stadiums themselves. It's always complicated, I'm sure the player's union would hate it.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Old Ray View Post
    Well, I know their counterparts in San Diego, who argue that the Chargers simply making the playoffs justifies leaving the crumbling bridges, potholes, and sidewalks of the city alone and diverting ALL funds to a fancy new waterfront stadium.

    Madness indeed. That's the ticket.
    Roads, schmoads. Them bazillionaires are runnin' out of private jet fuel! Where's your compassion man!?!?!?!
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    Quote Originally Posted by B-Mac View Post
    Roads, schmoads. Them bazillionaires are runnin' out of private jet fuel! Where's your compassion man!?!?!?!
    It's true. I'm a bad person.

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    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    I don't remember being this confused in any other thread.




    Same here.
    Quote Originally Posted by targnik View Post
    So I shoot off all full of bravado, hit this wee booter - grabbing some air, then I land - leading into a greasy rut.

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