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  1. #1
    Meatbomb
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    The Punch Line Thread

    "Nope, I was eating an Ice Cream"

  2. #2
    mtbr member
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    "the fat ones"

  3. #3
    thread crapper
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    Why the long face?

  4. #4
    9 lives
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    Ill have what shes having.
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  5. #5
    mtbr member
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    " Hey the duck's with me!"
    The ridiculousness of cycling clothes increase exponentially in relation to the distance from your bicycle.

  6. #6
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    It's not you it's me, that's my routine.
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  7. #7
    El Gato Malo
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    "No, I mean what happened with the pickle slicer."
    "Oh, she got fired too."

  8. #8
    9 lives
    Reputation: cyclelicious's Avatar
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    tit for tat
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  9. #9
    bust a move
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    good morning ladies

  10. #10
    El Gato Malo
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    "And you're ugly too"

  11. #11
    Meatbomb
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    "does this look swollen to you?"

  12. #12
    mtbr member
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    english mfer! do you speak it?!

    (technically, not a punch line but I find I use it alot as such)

  13. #13
    Afric Pepperbird
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    Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

  14. #14
    gobsmacked Moderator
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    The Punch Line Thread

    Artie chokes 3 for a dollar.

  15. #15
    meow meow
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    figured one of em woulda ducked.

  16. #16
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    Oh, piss off!

  17. #17
    BM and PQ Trail Rep
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    "Doc said...
    Your gonna die"
    Apathy will get you exactly what you deserve

  18. #18
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    "that's what she said"

  19. #19
    9 lives
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    "You think that's disgusting you should see him make donuts."
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  20. #20
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    budum-pahhh!

  21. #21
    heaven help me
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    Rectum, hell, damn near killed him.

  22. #22
    Terrain Sculptor
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    Nut bolts and screws.
    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja's Son
    You may be happy to hear that my dad has kicked cancer's ass. Now he's looking for whoever sent it.

  23. #23
    ...but I'm a Silly Hunter
    Reputation: Haint's Avatar
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    But he's picking Watermelons!!!
    I like Sand - I don't like Witches


  24. #24
    El Gato Malo
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    All I see is the tip of the iceberg

  25. #25
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    "...to get to the other side".

  26. #26
    mtbr member
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    "Because it was stapled to the chicken"

  27. #27
    banned
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    "can we loan this guy $80.00?"

  28. #28
    mtbr member
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    "Now where's that old lady with the impacted molar?"

  29. #29
    Meatbomb
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    You're gonna hate tuesdays

  30. #30
    9 lives
    Reputation: cyclelicious's Avatar
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    "The potato is supposed to go down the front of your speedo, not the back!!"
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  31. #31
    CB of the East
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    Radio? What Radio?

  32. #32
    Professional Crastinator
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    Arrrrrr, it's drivin' me nuts!

    -F
    It's never easier - you just go faster.

  33. #33
    I'm just messing with you
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    Every time I close my eyes I see that monkey trying to put the cork back in.
    Chasing bears through the woods drunk with a dull hatchet is strongly not advised

  34. #34
    CB of the East
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    Michael Jackson

  35. #35
    mtbr member
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    So the Rabbi says "should we tell him where the stepping stones are?"
    The ridiculousness of cycling clothes increase exponentially in relation to the distance from your bicycle.

  36. #36
    mtbr member
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    "Yeah I'm not a veterinarian either, but I know a horses @ss when I see one!"
    The ridiculousness of cycling clothes increase exponentially in relation to the distance from your bicycle.

  37. #37
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    Tasted like peanut butter.
    The ridiculousness of cycling clothes increase exponentially in relation to the distance from your bicycle.

  38. #38
    Sleek Jamis Exile Rider
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    The Punch Line Thread

    Silly Rabbi, kicks are for trids

  39. #39
    9 lives
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fleas View Post
    Arrrrrr, it's drivin' me nuts!

    -F
    I laugh everytime i hear that joke

    Here's another:

    "It was the day after I got me hook!"
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  40. #40
    mtbr member
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    "I'm Bubbles"
    2012 Rockhopper 29er.

  41. #41
    Professional Crastinator
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    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    I laugh everytime i hear that joke

    Here's another:

    "It was the day after I got me hook!"
    Name:  Eye-Patch-Smiley.png
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    -F
    It's never easier - you just go faster.

  42. #42
    Professional Crastinator
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    Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald.

    -F
    It's never easier - you just go faster.

  43. #43
    Afric Pepperbird
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    "A horse, because a vest has no sleeves!"

  44. #44
    mtbr member
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    That's not a plad dildo! That's my Thermos!

  45. #45
    9 lives
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    But by the grace of God, Vaseline and these two fingers, I think I got most of them back in.
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  46. #46
    Professional Crastinator
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    "...and a Diet Coke."

    -F
    It's never easier - you just go faster.

  47. #47
    CB of the East
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    Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.

  48. #48
    One ring to mash them all
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    "Would you two stop making a spectacle of yourselves?"
    \(_o)/

  49. #49
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    " None of your damn business"
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  50. #50
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    What was in the bag?
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  51. #51
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    None of your damn business. lol..
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  52. #52
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    That's not my dog.
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  53. #53
    9 lives
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    I said ping pong balls, not King Kong's balls!
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  54. #54
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    You don't eat a great pig like that all at once..
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  55. #55
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    A farmer had a pig with two wooden legs. He was a great pig.
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  56. #56
    Cycologist
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    Oh, that's just daaahhhhhad!
    There are two types of people in this world:
    1) Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data

  57. #57
    Afric Pepperbird
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    Honey, do you think it'll fit?

  58. #58
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    "If I knew that ducks eat free at Subway, I would have ordered a much larger sandwich."
    "Don't bother ringing it up, it's for a duck."
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  59. #59
    9 lives
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    The other nun replied, "It's probably the cobblestones."
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  60. #60
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    If it looks like butter, feels like butter and tastes like butter, it's probably butter.
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  61. #61
    mtbr member
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    "Show him your Badge!"

  62. #62
    Rabid Lana fan
    Reputation: net wurker's Avatar
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    "When you're out of slits, you're out of pier".
    rOCktoberfest 2015 pt I here
    rOCktoberfest 2015 pt II here

  63. #63
    Likes cs protector's
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    Sun of a mutherless goat!?!
    ...

  64. #64
    Likes cs protector's
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    It smells like a vajinaz vajina in here
    ...

  65. #65
    Cycologist
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    Oh great, some a$$hole's got my pen!
    There are two types of people in this world:
    1) Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data

  66. #66
    Likes cs protector's
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    Put a wig on it!
    ...

  67. #67
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    None of your damn business.
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  68. #68
    Afric Pepperbird
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    To get to the other side.

  69. #69
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    Hickory dickory dock.
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  70. #70
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    Hickory dickory dock.
    And drop her off at the next block.
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  71. #71
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    "If you're flammable and have legs. You are never blocking the fire exit"
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  72. #72
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    Quote Originally Posted by chazpat View Post
    Oh great, some a$$hole's got my pen!
    So the doctor says "there's my thermometer! Now where the heck did my pen go?"
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  73. #73
    Cycologist
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    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    So the doctor says "there's my thermometer! Now where the heck did my pen go?"
    Doctor: "I just need you to sign this release and you'll be on your way. Here, use my pen".

    Patient: "Uh doc, but that's not a pen, it's a rectal thermometer."
    There are two types of people in this world:
    1) Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data

  74. #74
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    Bennit? Hell I broke it!
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  75. #75
    Likes cs protector's
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    Just riding along
    ...

  76. #76
    mtbr member
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    "what's the name of his other leg?"

  77. #77
    mtbr member
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    "I hardly know her?!"

  78. #78
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    Quote Originally Posted by Phillbo View Post
    "Nope, I was eating an Ice Cream"
    Quote Originally Posted by 53119 View Post
    "the fat ones"
    Quote Originally Posted by Shytie View Post
    Why the long face?
    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    Ill have what shes having.
    Quote Originally Posted by junior1210 View Post
    " Hey the duck's with me!"
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    It's not you it's me, that's my routine.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wishful Tomcat View Post
    "No, I mean what happened with the pickle slicer."
    "Oh, she got fired too."
    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    tit for tat
    Quote Originally Posted by 2ridealot View Post
    good morning ladies
    Quote Originally Posted by Wishful Tomcat View Post
    "And you're ugly too"
    Quote Originally Posted by Phillbo View Post
    "does this look swollen to you?"
    Quote Originally Posted by 53119 View Post
    english mfer! do you speak it?!

    (technically, not a punch line but I find I use it alot as such)
    Quote Originally Posted by dirt farmer View Post
    Orange you glad I didn't say banana?
    Quote Originally Posted by b-kul View Post
    figured one of em woulda ducked.
    Quote Originally Posted by SCR818 View Post
    Oh, piss off!
    Quote Originally Posted by bankerboy View Post
    "Doc said...
    Your gonna die"
    Quote Originally Posted by SCR818 View Post
    "that's what she said"
    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    "You think that's disgusting you should see him make donuts."
    Quote Originally Posted by SCR818 View Post
    budum-pahhh!
    Quote Originally Posted by norton55 View Post
    Rectum, hell, damn near killed him.
    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja View Post
    Nut bolts and screws.
    Quote Originally Posted by Haint View Post
    But he's picking Watermelons!!!
    Quote Originally Posted by Wishful Tomcat View Post
    All I see is the tip of the iceberg
    Quote Originally Posted by SCR818 View Post
    "...to get to the other side".
    Quote Originally Posted by GR1822 View Post
    "Because it was stapled to the chicken"
    Quote Originally Posted by BigRingGrinder View Post
    "can we loan this guy $80.00?"
    Quote Originally Posted by jackbombay View Post
    "Now where's that old lady with the impacted molar?"
    Quote Originally Posted by Phillbo View Post
    You're gonna hate tuesdays
    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    "The potato is supposed to go down the front of your speedo, not the back!!"
    Quote Originally Posted by bedwards1000 View Post
    Radio? What Radio?
    Quote Originally Posted by Fleas View Post
    Arrrrrr, it's drivin' me nuts!

    -F
    Quote Originally Posted by wv_bob View Post
    Every time I close my eyes I see that monkey trying to put the cork back in.
    Quote Originally Posted by bedwards1000 View Post
    Michael Jackson
    Quote Originally Posted by junior1210 View Post
    So the Rabbi says "should we tell him where the stepping stones are?"
    Quote Originally Posted by junior1210 View Post
    "Yeah I'm not a veterinarian either, but I know a horses @ss when I see one!"
    Quote Originally Posted by junior1210 View Post
    Tasted like peanut butter.
    Quote Originally Posted by MadMacMan View Post
    Silly Rabbi, kicks are for trids
    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    I laugh everytime i hear that joke

    Here's another:

    "It was the day after I got me hook!"
    Quote Originally Posted by joshh View Post
    "I'm Bubbles"
    Quote Originally Posted by Fleas View Post
    Name:  Eye-Patch-Smiley.png
Views: 183
Size:  7.3 KB







    -F
    Quote Originally Posted by Fleas View Post
    Gerald Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzgerald.

    -F
    Quote Originally Posted by dirt farmer View Post
    "A horse, because a vest has no sleeves!"
    Quote Originally Posted by Huck Pitueee View Post
    That's not a plad dildo! That's my Thermos!
    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    But by the grace of God, Vaseline and these two fingers, I think I got most of them back in.
    Quote Originally Posted by Fleas View Post
    "...and a Diet Coke."

    -F
    Quote Originally Posted by bedwards1000 View Post
    Because sheep can hear a zipper a mile away.
    Quote Originally Posted by the one ring View Post
    "Would you two stop making a spectacle of yourselves?"
    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    " None of your damn business"
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    What was in the bag?
    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    None of your damn business. lol..
    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    That's not my dog.
    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    I said ping pong balls, not King Kong's balls!
    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    You don't eat a great pig like that all at once..
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    A farmer had a pig with two wooden legs. He was a great pig.
    Quote Originally Posted by chazpat View Post
    Oh, that's just daaahhhhhad!
    Quote Originally Posted by dirt farmer View Post
    Honey, do you think it'll fit?
    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    The other nun replied, "It's probably the cobblestones."
    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    "If I knew that ducks eat free at Subway, I would have ordered a much larger sandwich."
    "Don't bother ringing it up, it's for a duck."
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    If it looks like butter, feels like butter and tastes like butter, it's probably butter.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tribble Me View Post
    "Show him your Badge!"
    Quote Originally Posted by net wurker View Post
    "When you're out of slits, you're out of pier".
    Quote Originally Posted by J: View Post
    Sun of a mutherless goat!?!
    Quote Originally Posted by J: View Post
    It smells like a vajinaz vajina in here
    Quote Originally Posted by chazpat View Post
    Oh great, some a$$hole's got my pen!
    Quote Originally Posted by J: View Post
    Put a wig on it!
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    None of your damn business.
    Quote Originally Posted by dirt farmer View Post
    To get to the other side.
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    Hickory dickory dock.
    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    And drop her off at the next block.
    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    "If you're flammable and have legs. You are never blocking the fire exit"
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    So the doctor says "there's my thermometer! Now where the heck did my pen go?"
    Quote Originally Posted by chazpat View Post
    Doctor: "I just need you to sign this release and you'll be on your way. Here, use my pen".

    Patient: "Uh doc, but that's not a pen, it's a rectal thermometer."
    Quote Originally Posted by DIRTJUNKIE View Post
    Bennit? Hell I broke it!
    Quote Originally Posted by J: View Post
    Just riding along
    Quote Originally Posted by MOJO K View Post
    "what's the name of his other leg?"
    Quote Originally Posted by MOJO K View Post
    "I hardly know her?!"

    I've got nothing.
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  79. #79
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    That is the best post ever. OMFG ILMAO!!!!! Thank you DJ for my Friday evening......SFLMAO!!!
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  80. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    That is the best post ever. OMFG ILMAO!!!!! Thank you DJ for my Friday evening......SFLMAO!!!
    Oh c'mon, don't encourage him!
    American Idle

  81. #81
    Nothing seems to kill me
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    Sorry, could not be helped. That was some funny sh!t..
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

  82. #82
    mtbr member
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    47? That's a bit old to be believin' in Leprechauns!

    Death....by bunga bunga!

    It tastes like crap? Oh yeah, turn it over.

    Well, I didn't wish for a twelve inch pianist!

    Yeah, now his name is Kareem-o-wheat.

  83. #83
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    Quote Originally Posted by CUP-TON View Post
    Sorry, could not be helped. That was some funny sh!t..
    He knows multi-quoting drives me crazy, I bet he's doing it on purpose, lol!
    American Idle

  84. #84
    Cycologist
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cornfield View Post
    He knows multi-quoting drives me crazy, I bet he's doing it on purpose, lol!
    Quote Originally Posted by Cornfield View Post
    He knows multi-quoting drives me crazy, I bet he's doing it on purpose, lol!
    Quote Originally Posted by Cornfield View Post
    He knows multi-quoting drives me crazy, I bet he's doing it on purpose, lol!
    And the most quoted was himself!
    There are two types of people in this world:
    1) Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data

  85. #85
    That guy
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    I bet you microwave tuna.
    American Idle

  86. #86
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cornfield View Post
    I bet you microwave tuna.
    Hey, I've already confessed to being 25% of that crew.
    There are two types of people in this world:
    1) Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data

  87. #87
    Cycologist
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    Wanna go camping?
    There are two types of people in this world:
    1) Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data

  88. #88
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    I think I know what's gonna happen next.
    American Idle

  89. #89
    Self Appointed Judge&Jury
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    Life behind bars and soap grabbing?
    ----------- __o
    --------- _`\<,_
    BRAAP(>)/ (*)
    ************^^^^\_(ツ)_/

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqpcBpSsj1A

  90. #90
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    And Dim Sum!
    Hello, my name is human and I came down from the stars.

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