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Thread: my name is john

  1. #1
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    my name is john

    Hey cyclists,
    My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are thick legged, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day pedaling stupid @ss bikes. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any *****? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than skateboarding down a public staircase.
    Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than “pedal my stupid bike around”? I also get straight A’s, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; **** was SO cash). You should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

  2. #2
    All fat, all the time.
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    Goin' for the red or what?

    Sounds like you need to get laid LOL. (with a girl)....

  3. #3
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    C'mon, let it out, its okay, you can tell us, no shame. Did your priest touch you?

  4. #4
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    John

    You seem a bit angry???
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    Falling down is part of LIFE…Getting back up is LIVING…

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    A Tyler Hamilton fanboi.

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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ.MTNS View Post
    C'mon, let it out, its okay, you can tell us, no shame. Did your priest touch you?
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    John, your mom called, wants you to get off the internet, she's trying to call home.

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    Are you OK Eric?
    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja's Son
    You may be happy to hear that my dad has kicked cancer's ass. Now he's looking for whoever sent it.

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    Our trolls are getting weak. An influx of pinkbike refugees me thinks.

  10. #10
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    8 replies.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    Hey cyclists,
    My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are thick legged, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day pedaling stupid @ss bikes. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any *****? I mean, I guess it’s fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than skateboarding down a public staircase.
    Don’t be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I’m pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than “pedal my stupid bike around”? I also get straight A’s, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; **** was SO cash). You should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.
    John, meet Eric.

    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    My name is Eric, and the Earth has orbited the Sun 26 times since I have been born. I live in N. Phoenix, 7th ave and greenway about a mile from Shaw Butte. I used to race ABA BMX when i was 13, but got too tall. I bought a mountain bike 2 years ago and i now have an addiction that occupies much of my thought. I work as a tech for a non-medical laboratory, before that I worked in the firearms industry, and before that i was an Army Infantryman(11B,04-08). By night I am a professional karaoke singer/ pool shark...jk. Other than MTBing i like to play the vidya games, educate myself about things that i find interesting(zoology, ecology engineering, materials production). Once something interests me i research it until i have at least a satisfactory understanding of it. Im not much for alcohol, but i like brown ales. Moose Drool is my current favorite. No kids, not married..........ladies

    Bikes
    stock '08 ReignX2, that is about to get a new fork and brakes. Also a currently unrideable Giant revel. I also have access to a Giant talon 29er. (Im not a giant loyalist)
    Fortunately my dad is nice enough to let me take his Fuel EX8 for a spin every now and then.

    Im a kinda shy quiet guy, I have not met any forum members. However, I want to ride some more gnarly trails and I ought to meet some riding partners. Im a tall guy who usually wear a gray and green fox jersey, with a desert camo camel back. Im down for all types of riding from XC to DH. I climb at pretty leisurely pace and try to descend as fast as the trail allows. I drive an isuzu rodeo that can fit 2 bikes in the back, if slightly stacked on top of each other. I have absolutely no opposition to the occasional flag, sedona, or sunrise trip.
    It's OK to be yourself in here. We're a friendly group...

    EDIT: I just looked at your profile and it shows the following...

    Last Activity: 3 Minutes Ago
    Current Activity: Modifying Post my name is john
    What'cha changing???

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    8 replies.
    All attention is not good attention, fyi

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    8 replies.


    Yeah, its a slow day.

  14. #14
    check your six
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    OP's favorite veggie...
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    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by sodak06 View Post
    OP's favorite veggie...
    This is me and my girl:
    <img src="http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/002/901/OrigCash.jpg">

    None of you can get women like this or afford Grey Goose vodka, because you spend all your time and money on those dumb bikes

  16. #16
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    That's a good thing for me. I'm not a fan of walking, talking STDs. Fake tan, fake boobs, fake personality, but I guess I should quit busting on you and talk about the girl too.

  17. #17
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    meh... nevermind...
    Last edited by sodak; 12-11-2012 at 03:10 PM.
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

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    Nice try "John," but I've seen this before.

    A little more info on your "girlfriend" and "you." Sorry you died in 2007, Paulie...

    Some info about this photo:
    In mid-2007 an image of a typical Guido and his bleached and faux-tanned girlfriend and its accompanying text was spammed relentlessly on /b/ and after a period during which it was considered a forced meme, it took on a life of its own, with posters changing and mutating the contents to cover a wide variety of subjects, from anime to religion to chemistry.
    The young man pictured turned out to be Paulie Carbone, who died July 10th 2007 in a street racing accident in New Jersey. The image appears to have been appropriated by a troll who happened upon Carbone's memorial myspace page.
    A copy of the text that has been spammed numerous times since 2007:

    Hey F*****s,

    My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid a$$ pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any *****? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.

    Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than "jack off to naked drawn Japanese people"? I also get straight A's, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; **** was SO cash). You are all ******* who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.

    Pic Related: It's me and my b*tch
    You really do need to get some...

  19. #19
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    Dude, you have awesome eyebrows.

    Is that from training them, or were you just born with it?
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  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    8 replies.
    The thread "nevermind" got 23 replies. You're not doing that great.
    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja's Son
    You may be happy to hear that my dad has kicked cancer's ass. Now he's looking for whoever sent it.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by wahday View Post
    Nice try "John," but I've seen this before.

    You mean this knob couldn't even think up his own troll post? That's freakin' hilarious!
    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja's Son
    You may be happy to hear that my dad has kicked cancer's ass. Now he's looking for whoever sent it.

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    This is me and my girl:
    <img src="http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/002/901/OrigCash.jpg">

    None of you can get women like this or afford Grey Goose vodka, because you spend all your time and money on those dumb bikes
    ^.. jersey shore redux .. what else ya got? the oc is a tough place to do stand-up..finish your set strong cuz beer:30 is about to start.

  23. #23
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    biking without a seat makes me grouchy too

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by wahday View Post
    Nice try "John," but I've seen this before.

    A little more info on your "girlfriend" and "you." Sorry you died in 2007, Paulie...

    Some info about this photo:
    Quote:
    In mid-2007 an image of a typical Guido and his bleached and faux-tanned girlfriend and its accompanying text was spammed relentlessly on /b/ and after a period during which it was considered a forced meme, it took on a life of its own, with posters changing and mutating the contents to cover a wide variety of subjects, from anime to religion to chemistry.
    The young man pictured turned out to be Paulie Carbone, who died July 10th 2007 in a street racing accident in New Jersey. The image appears to have been appropriated by a troll who happened upon Carbone's memorial myspace page.

    A copy of the text that has been spammed numerous times since 2007:

    Quote:
    Hey F*****s,

    My name is John, and I hate every single one of you. All of you are fat, retarded, no-lifes who spend every second of their day looking at stupid a$$ pictures. You are everything bad in the world. Honestly, have any of you ever gotten any *****? I mean, I guess it's fun making fun of people because of your own insecurities, but you all take to a whole new level. This is even worse than jerking off to pictures on facebook.

    Don't be a stranger. Just hit me with your best shot. I'm pretty much perfect. I was captain of the football team, and starter on my basketball team. What sports do you play, other than "jack off to naked drawn Japanese people"? I also get straight A's, and have a banging hot girlfriend (She just blew me; **** was SO cash). You are all ******* who should just kill yourselves. Thanks for listening.


    Pic Related: It's me and my b*tch
    You really do need to get some...
    /weak sauce thread. There are good troll threads and then there is this.

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by wahday View Post
    nice try "john," but i've seen this before.

    A little more info on your "girlfriend" and "you." sorry you died in 2007, paulie...

    Some info about this photo:


    A copy of the text that has been spammed numerous times since 2007:



    You really do need to get some...

    lol.

  26. #26
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    Meh, it was obvious you were trollin'. But, I thought it was a little funny. We can pretend this never happened and give you a second chance.

  27. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    This is me and my girl:
    <img src="http://i0.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/original/000/002/901/OrigCash.jpg">

    None of you can get women like this or afford Grey Goose vodka, because you spend all your time and money on those dumb bikes
    thats your girlfriend? well, tell her the blowjob she gave me wasnt worth the 20 bucks and pack of smokes i gave her for it.
    If you arent bleeding, you arent riding hard enough.
    http://about.me/bigterry

    Quote Originally Posted by Hutch3637 View Post
    I don't need sex. My life fvcks me daily.

  28. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by big terry View Post
    thats your girlfriend? well, tell her the blowjob she gave me wasnt worth the 20 bucks and pack of smokes i gave her for it.




    Dude. You were robbed. Tranny bj's are only $10.00.

  29. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by big terry View Post
    thats your girlfriend? well, tell her the blowjob she gave me wasnt worth the 20 bucks and pack of smokes i gave her for it.
    That was nice of you to throw in an extra $20.
    Quote Originally Posted by Trail Ninja's Son
    You may be happy to hear that my dad has kicked cancer's ass. Now he's looking for whoever sent it.

  30. #30
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    I'm glad I got my boots on because it
    sure is deep here. Plus that girl didn't
    look very hot to me, and I'm not hard
    to please.

  31. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by John Kuhl View Post
    Plus that girl didn't
    look very hot to me, and I'm not hard
    to please.
    Agreed. Bltch looks Nasssstttyyyy

  32. #32
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    Hey Eric, where, exactly, is your hand in this picture?



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  33. #33
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    /oc/
    No, YOU don't understand. You're making an ass of yourself for all of eternity.

  34. #34
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    The only reason that burnt girl lets you so close is because she thinks you are gay. Anyone with eyebrows and a tan like that is gay. Tans like a gay, brows like gay. must be a gay.

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  35. #35
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    I would have a glove on that hand.

  36. #36
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    Listen, John (if that's even your real fvcking name), you just stuck your tiny dik in a big bee hive. Do you have any idea who we are? I just did a reverse lookup of you ip address and found you. I have already collected your browser history and will have a running log of everywhere you go from now on.

    Just from a cursory glance, you are disgusting and you make me sick. Those little girls had no idea those pictures were being taken of them. You have been warned.
    No, YOU don't understand. You're making an ass of yourself for all of eternity.

  37. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by wmac View Post
    Listen, John (if that's even your real fvcking name), you just stuck your tiny dik in a big bee hive. Do you have any idea who we are? I just did a reverse lookup of you ip address and found you. I have already collected your browser history and will have a running log of everywhere you go from now on.

    Just from a cursory glance, you are disgusting and you make me sick. Those little girls had no idea those pictures were being taken of them. You have been warned.
    This post contains so much win.
    If you arent bleeding, you arent riding hard enough.
    http://about.me/bigterry

    Quote Originally Posted by Hutch3637 View Post
    I don't need sex. My life fvcks me daily.

  38. #38
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    Wow you suck worse than tl1 at this trolling thing.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tone's View Post
    Id scrap the passion forum all together, its a breeding ground for unicorn milkers, rainbow chasers and candy cotton farters.

  39. #39
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    Fcuk, I can't tell which one is the boy and which one is the girl. They are both "pretty and soft" looking.

  40. #40
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    boys have a penis, girls have a va-gin-a.
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  41. #41
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    Nice quote from Kindergarten Cop!

    Which one has which though in that pic???

  42. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by net wurker View Post
    Hey Eric, where, exactly, is your hand in this picture?








    Tryin to find his wrist watch.

  43. #43
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    "Not going anywhere for a while? Better have a snickers".
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  44. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by wmac View Post
    Listen, John (if that's even your real fvcking name), you just stuck your tiny dik in a big bee hive. Do you have any idea who we are? I just did a reverse lookup of you ip address and found you. I have already collected your browser history and will have a running log of everywhere you go from now on.

    Just from a cursory glance, you are disgusting and you make me sick. Those little girls had no idea those pictures were being taken of them. You have been warned.
    What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little *****? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're ****ing dead, kiddo.

  45. #45
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    Wow... You're a special kind of special. Lay off the bath salts bro
    Quote Originally Posted by Bubbles
    That depends. Can you go fvck yourself?

  46. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by AZ.MTNS View Post
    Tryin to find his wrist watch.
    If it's where I think it is I'm not sure how it got there cuz he doesn't look like the kind of guy to put anything of his in that area Too icky
    Quote Originally Posted by Bubbles
    That depends. Can you go fvck yourself?

  47. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little *****? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're ****ing dead, kiddo.


    Make up your mind Twit, Seals or the Corp.

  48. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by PhaseSpace168 View Post
    What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little *****? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're ****ing dead, kiddo.


    Yup. Definately a 9 yo in mom and dads basement. Probably up past his bed time.
    It's such a fine line between idiocy and genius.

  49. #49
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    Been playing too much call of duty
    Quote Originally Posted by Bubbles
    That depends. Can you go fvck yourself?

  50. #50
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    If you're mis-using your power so badly, don't you think it would be a stupid idea to post it on a public forum?

    Man, even politicians aren't that dense.

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