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Thread: Deep Thoughts

  1. #1
    Meatbomb
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    Deep Thoughts

    What deep thinkers men are...
    I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer.

    The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking on various topics.

    Finally I thought about an age old question:

    Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?

    Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.

    Well, after another beer, and some heavy deductive thinking,
    I have come up with the answer to that question.

    Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby; and here is the reason for my conclusion.

    A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."

    On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."

    I rest my case. Time for another beer.

  2. #2
    Meatbomb
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    Who loves you more, your wife or your dog ?

    Lock them both in the truck of your car for an hour and see which one is happy to see you when you open it.

  3. #3
    King of Middle Earth
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    Looks like you been ingesting/injecting more than just a few beers.

    Of course giving birth is more painful than getting kicked in the jewels. For us guys, we are in pain for less than 5 minutes. For women, giving birth is like pushing a soccer ball out of a very tight spot and it takes far longer than 5 minutes, more like hours and hours.

    So, the question for you is, do you think you can live with the pain of getting kicked in the gems for possibly hours and hours?

    Luckily for women, the pain memory of giving birth is generally over shadowed by the joy of bringing life into this world. Therefore, the pain part of it is said to often be forgotten.
    fee-fy-fo-fum...

  4. #4
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    Deep Thoughts

    Quote Originally Posted by Phillbo View Post
    What deep thinkers men are...
    I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer.

    The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking on various topics.

    Finally I thought about an age old question:

    Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?

    Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts.

    Well, after another beer, and some heavy deductive thinking,
    I have come up with the answer to that question.

    Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby; and here is the reason for my conclusion.

    A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."

    On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."

    I rest my case. Time for another beer.

    Hahah this is gold!

  5. #5
    dru
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    Hawg, what are you doing adding reason to that argument? It sounded good to me, then you wrecked it.....

    Drew
    occasional cyclist

  6. #6
    King of Middle Earth
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    Quote Originally Posted by dru View Post
    Hawg, what are you doing adding reason to that argument? It sounded good to me, then you wrecked it.....

    Drew
    Compassion, Drew, compassion...
    fee-fy-fo-fum...

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Phillbo View Post
    Lock them both in the truck of your car...
    wut?

  8. #8
    gobsmacked Moderator
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    Robert Plant is a senior today. Ponder that.

  9. #9
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    Ain't no comparison. A kick in the nuts is only designed to provide a shadow of empathy and short lived.
    I'm afraid of heights so a 26'r fits me to a T.

  10. #10
    I didn't do it
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    If one gets kicked in the nuts by a buck while in the forest and no one is around to hear you scream were you really kicked in the nuts?

  11. #11
    mighty sailin' man
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    new york texas toast is made in ohio
    Quote Originally Posted by davidarnott
    wheelies, beyond being the best way over any sort of obstacle, both above or below, are are the steedliest expresstion of joy

  12. #12
    sympathy for society
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    First off, you main problem is that you waited till after the lawn was mowed to enjoy that beer. You must multi-task my friend, beer in one hand and mower in the other.
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  13. #13
    King of Middle Earth
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    Quote Originally Posted by sodak View Post
    First off, you main problem is that you waited till after the lawn was mowed to enjoy that beer. You must multi-task my friend, beer in one hand and mower in the other.
    Almost...if it was my task, I'd relax in a lawn chair with a beer or two while staring at the lawn. Then I'd get up and get everything together one-handed, and half assed. Why one handed? Because my other hand would be filled with another beer, far more important and that's where my concentration would be. Eventually, the lawn would get mowed but after that you'd see my legs in a face down position, poking out of the perimeter hedge. A job well done...
    fee-fy-fo-fum...

  14. #14
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    Which came first: orange the color or orange the fruit?

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Phillbo View Post
    Who loves you more, your wife or your dog ?
    Dog wins

    No Cookies | Herald Sun

  16. #16
    King of Middle Earth
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wishful Tomcat View Post
    Which came first: orange the color or orange the fruit?
    That all depends on how many beers I had during the lawn mowing session.
    fee-fy-fo-fum...

  17. #17
    sympathy for society
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hawg View Post
    Almost...if it was my task, I'd relax in a lawn chair with a beer or two while staring at the lawn. Then I'd get up and get everything together one-handed, and half assed. Why one handed? Because my other hand would be filled with another beer, far more important and that's where my concentration would be. Eventually, the lawn would get mowed but after that you'd see my legs in a face down position, poking out of the perimeter hedge. A job well done...
    Sounds like my exact plan for tomorrow. I like to avoid the bushes though, it's hard to find someone in the bush.
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  18. #18
    Meatbomb
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    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Deep Thoughts-deep_thoughts.jpg  


  19. #19
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    ^^^ why not both?

  20. #20
    King of Middle Earth
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    Quote Originally Posted by sodak View Post
    Sounds like my exact plan for tomorrow. I like to avoid the bushes though, it's hard to find someone in the bush.
    There's bass biting somewhere tomorrow, ya know?
    fee-fy-fo-fum...

  21. #21
    sympathy for society
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hawg View Post
    There's bass biting somewhere tomorrow, ya know?
    Yeah I know... I just spent 4 days/3 night on the Shenandoah this (extended) weekend. Caught tons of smallies. The grass needs mowed and the only way to enjoy that chore is beer in one hand and mower in the other. lol...
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  22. #22
    King of Middle Earth
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    Quote Originally Posted by sodak View Post
    Yeah I know... I just spent 4 days/3 night on the Shenandoah this (extended) weekend. Caught tons of smallies. The grass needs mowed and the only way to enjoy that chore is beer in one hand and mower in the other. lol...
    What? Huh? Why no fishing report/pics over in Randy's thread?! We need to keep that thread ALIVE.
    fee-fy-fo-fum...

  23. #23
    High Desert MTBer
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    It's all Here. Now.

  24. #24
    sympathy for society
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hawg View Post
    What? Huh? Why no fishing report/pics over in Randy's thread?! We need to keep that thread ALIVE.
    Well, in my defense we paddled a total of 73 miles in 4 days. I was the only one who brought fishing gear so I had to fish in between long paddling stretches. I rarely pulled out my phone but managed a couple of pics. I will get them up asap.
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  25. #25
    Front Range, Colorado
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    The rugged outdoor woman

    During her physical examination, a doctor asked a middle- aged woman about her physical activity level.

    The woman said she spent 3 days a week, every week in the outdoors.

    "Yesterday afternoon was very typical, I took a five hour walk, about 7 miles through some pretty rough terrain.

    "I waded along the edge of a lake. I pushed my way through 2 miles of marsh. I got sand in my shoes and in my eyes.

    "I barely avoided stepping on a snake. The mental stress of it all left me shattered. At the end of it all I drank 3 beers and a glass of wine".

    Amazed by the story, the doctor said. "You must be one hell of an outdoor woman". "No" the woman replied, "I'm just a really, really, really, really shitty golfer".
    --------- __o
    ------- _`\<,_
    ------ (*)/ (*)
    ************^^^^^^^^^Rock Garden

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