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  1. #1
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    My wife and I bought our house a year ago. It was a brand new house and we got to do a lot towards setting it up. It is also our first house.
    Our next door neighbors are awesome! We all get together on the weekends and party. We help each other with mowing lawns, watching kids, whatever. Those houses are also brand new.
    The neighbors right behind us however have been there for 9 years. When we moved in, they had morning glory flowers growing over the fences and spilling into our yard. They seemed friendly and we talked a lot. They told us the flowers were no big deal, cut them back whenever we needed to. When the flowers went dormant last fall, we trimmed them back to the top of the fence.
    Last Thursday, after my wife dropped our girls off at school, which is two doors down from their home, the husband came out and acosted my wife. He took her into their back yard and showed her their morning glory plants, all dead. He accused us of poisoning them.
    This morning, after dropping off the kids at school, the wife came out in full-on attack mode. Screaming and yelling at my wife about killing her 'beautiful flowers'. She had a picture printed out of what the flowers looked like before we moved in, to show how they used to look. This b!tch wasn't interested in talking like normal people. It was full on, get in your face, attack mode.
    Naturally, I told my wife to immediately call the police the next time this happens. I want a report filed, in case this starts getting really ugly.

    However, for now, I want to start truly tweaking them. Loud music in the backyard, all weekend. Maybe something raunchy like some NWA, 2 Live Crew, etc.. We were also thinking about planting something invasive along the back fence line. Bamboo and blackberries are tops on our lists. But thats going to take some time. For sure, I am going to be cleaning my guns in the backyard this weekend. I might scrawl a GFY in their lawn with Round Up.

    So I turn to the OC for ideas on how to tweak them. I want to make their lives uncomfortable, but not get too crazy about things.
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  2. #2
    No known cure
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    Beware about the bamboo and vines. It could be considered "trespassing" and it's on you to remove anything from their property. This works both ways.

    I live in a national forest and have weekenders' kids playing in my back yard. I've told them they aren't welcome and have sprayed them with the hose while "watering" my yard. But they're playing right outside my bedroom window while I'm napping before work, and even playing under my house in the buildup. I don't want any liability if I "lock" them in. The parents don't care so I might have to scare them with the big watchdog. Effin Flatlanders. Don't call the cops either. No one wins when they show up.
    Ripping trails and tipping ales

  3. #3
    gobsmacked Moderator
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    Let it go. Why escalate? Pretty soon pets are poisoned and suddenly, we'll all see your real names under a new thread called, "batshit crazy neighbors in the news thread."

    Not worth the effort. Not worth the risk. Not worth the brain cells.

  4. #4
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    Grow pot



    win/win
    Honestly... ahh I give up

  5. #5
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Quote Originally Posted by girlonbike View Post
    Let it go. Why escalate? Pretty soon pets are poisoned and suddenly, we'll all see your real names under a new thread called, "batshit crazy neighbors in the news thread."

    Not worth the effort. Not worth the risk. Not worth the brain cells.
    You're no fun at all.

    Anybody else?

    And no Delll, I'm not growing weed. Ya stoner


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    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  6. #6
    gobsmacked Moderator
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Fine. Little eyeholes in the fence, and get some pictures of eyeballs, laminate them and tack them on your side of the fence. Get a gas leaf blower. 6am on Saturday....

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brewtality View Post
    You're no fun at all.

    Anybody else?

    And no Delll, I'm not growing weed. Ya stoner


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    OK, this may be playing on the fears of the bigoted (if they are) and it will require an actual horn-style loudspeaker to get the timbre just right.

    Play a Adhad/Azan at prescribed times throughout the day - Most Beautiful Azan ever heard. - YouTube
    Honestly... ahh I give up

  8. #8
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    Bamboo grows plenty quick. It's always sprouting up behind our yard (luckily no neighbors there) and it's usually possible to see the difference in growth between one day and the next. Give it a week or two and it's already above your fence.
    Sometimes, I question the value of my content.

  9. #9
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    Or, you could grow some morning glory flowers in your yard and let them spill out into the neighbors' yard.
    Sometimes, I question the value of my content.

  10. #10
    9 lives
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    Quote Originally Posted by highdelll View Post
    Grow pot



    win/win
    Morning Glories will also get you high

    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors-morning_glory_1.img_assist_custom-600x450.jpg

    Morning Glory

    The seeds are very similar to LSD, both morning glory and Hawaiian baby woodrose seeds contain LSA (lysergic acid amide), a psychedelic similar to LSD but about one tenth of the strength. Most seeds sold at stores are coated with a substance designed to make you feel ill and the best way to consume it is to extract it or find untainted seeds. The effects can last up to 14 hours and apparently produce a dreamlike state.

    5 Plants That Can Get You High
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  11. #11
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    Why make their lives uncomfortable? Won't that just give you guys a lot of stress? What would be your ultimate goal? I would apologise for what happened to their flowers, obviously something was done that killed em off, whether intentional or not, and get on with your lives. You seem to have a good thing going with the other neighbors, so make the most of that and try and ignore the ones out back. Life is too short to fill it with the kind of antagonism you mention.
    It's all Here. Now.

  12. #12
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    Oh Wait! This is the OC!

    Invite em round for a BBQ to make good on the flower murder, put LSD in the burgers... sit back, relax, watch...
    It's all Here. Now.

  13. #13
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Sign them up for publishers clearing house, and any other free magazine you can find. You can also sign the husband up for NAMBLA (North American Man Boy Live Association). Not that I've done that before or anything.


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    I wouldn't **** you, you're my favorite turd.

  14. #14
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    You had morning glory flowers growing over your fence and spilling into your yard and you cut them down? What the hell is wrong with you? They were fine until you and your wife came along.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by girlonbike View Post
    Let it go. Why escalate? Pretty soon pets are poisoned and suddenly, we'll all see your real names under a new thread called, "batshit crazy neighbors in the news thread."
    Location must be Florida, all the crazy sh!t seems to happen there.

  16. #16
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    If you're serious I think you should reconsider. Put the shoe on the other foot. Sh!tty people suck, don't be a sh!tty person. I would try being nice first. Maybe buy them some new flowers and offer to help plant them. That should show them that you don't mind, and therefore didn't do anything to their flowers. Even if you're right and they're wrong that doesn't make it better. Your house, your family, and your life, but that's my take.
    If that doesn't work and they're just aholes then all bets are off and it's time to fight fire with fire. Let us know, I can offer some good ideas.
    Round and round we go

  17. #17
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    Apologize, invite them in for dinner. Kidnap & bind them up. Keep them in a closet, basement, or attic. Slow torture...

  18. #18
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Quote Originally Posted by askibum02 View Post
    Sign them up for publishers clearing house, and any other free magazine you can find. You can also sign the husband up for NAMBLA (North American Man Boy Live Association).
    Now this is the kind of stuff I'm looking for. Bum here knows how to have fun with this situation.

    I think we would have been willing to play nice and talk things over, until the wife went on her rant yesterday. Hell, plants are cheap. I would have bought them a morning glory plant just to make nice. Yesterday changed things for us. These people are not reasonable people.



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    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  19. #19
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    As we say on another forum when neighbor-related problems come up.... Bang his wife!

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRed390 View Post
    As we say on another forum when neighbor-related problems come up.... Bang his wife!
    Or have all the neighbors over for a key party.

  21. #21
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    Well it depends on how big of an @sshole you wanna be, and how big your balls are.
    Could put sugar or a shredded golf ball into gas tank.
    Could take a sharp shovel and cut up the sprinkler system lines without a trace.
    Could get meadow in a can type stuff and sprinkle lawn.
    Could get a few bags of gravel and pour down into the house vent that sticks throu the roof.
    Could send some flowers to the wife when you know the husband's home with some made up lovers name.
    I personally would do little things in there face that piss them off and wait/hope that he confronts me again.
    Round and round we go

  22. #22
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    <iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/ml7C-WfL8f8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

    Play that for them on repeat.

  23. #23
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    Just remember that playing loud music will also annoy the neighbors you still like. Ignore the *******s and go about your life...

  24. #24
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    I thought Morning Glories were weeds. I guess not. I figure realistically you know what to do, but since this is the OC...

    Wait for Tone's to chime in on the topic.. He was great in helping me with a teenager. Body is completely dissolved and fed to the hogs at the farm a few miles down the road. He'll probably suggest banging the wife as part of the deal though and agree with the kidnapping/torture idea.

    Offer to replace the plants and then plant with poison ivy and pot on their side and call the cops out of concern once the pot is growing.

    Make a claim on the fence saying it's on your property and have them pay for the claim issue to make sure it's theirs.

    Get a telescope and point it at their house claiming you are just protecting the property out of concern for the flowers. Wave at the wife while doing said inspection. If she's ugly..make faces.

    Walk out in the yard buck naked while watering the flowers you replaced for them.

  25. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by theMeat View Post
    If you're serious I think you should reconsider. Put the shoe on the other foot. Sh!tty people suck, don't be a sh!tty person. I would try being nice first. Maybe buy them some new flowers and offer to help plant them. That should show them that you don't mind, and therefore didn't do anything to their flowers. Even if you're right and they're wrong that doesn't make it better. Your house, your family, and your life, but that's my take.
    If that doesn't work and they're just aholes then all bets are off and it's time to fight fire with fire. Let us know, I can offer some good ideas.
    I'm thinking the same. I'm not a mean person by nature. I'd have to assume that my crazy neighbor will be better at being crazy and doing mean things than I ever could. I'd up theMeat's plan by showing up on their doorstep with the plants and a six pack, wine, or ice tea to share with them. Not to mention it's never good to become your enemy. Furthermore, this is a good life lesson for your children and how to resolve conflicts at least try to resolve conflicts.

    I'm also down with the pot idea, but it would be along the idea of smoking pot to help forget about the neighbor.

    I'm a land surveyor and I've seen some pretty awful things that neighbors do to each other. Their lives are miserable and one usually ends up moving. I'm usually involved about the time a lawsuit happens. The only people that ever wins in these cases are the lawyers. Don't be a hater.

    But then of course there's this -Satisfying, Harmless Revenge on Your Neighbor with Liquid ASS

    No matter what, revenge is best served cold. Give them a chance to cool off before going rambo on them. Retaliators usually get busted.

  26. #26
    humber river advocate
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    build a pump track/dirt jumps in your backyard... that's a win win scenario!



    also good for rc'ing

    Last edited by singlesprocket; 06-05-2013 at 05:57 PM.
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    build trail!

  27. #27
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    So with my neighbors, I know where they hide their spare key. When they aren't home, I go in there and lay around naked and relax. Maybe mess with their toothbrushes. Course I'm not fighting with my neighbors, so I have no idea what I would do if I were in your shoes.

  28. #28
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    if it's going over the fence into your yard, it's fair game to cut it back whether they like it or not. it's also fair game to spray them with herbicide for that matter, because too much plant growth hanging on a fence can encourage rot or rust and bring it down faster. Some plants have holdfasts and tendrils that will actually physically break apart structures for that matter. They have no grounds to complain, really.

    I wouldn't plant anything invasive back there. You're asking for trouble for yourself if/when you want them out of your own yard.

    You might try something that smells bad, however. Female ginkgo trees smell horrendous. They're very hard to find for good reason. The smell is described as that of rancid butter or vomit.

    Skunk cabbage is another option. It's an early spring plant (that produces enough heat to melt snow) and tends to smell like rotting meat.

    There are a few tropicals that smell like rotting meat or corpses, if your climate would be acceptable for them.

  29. #29
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    Post a classified ad asking for individuals interested in a gangbang including the time and place. Or a classified ad for a tupperware party, religious meeting, etc. Take a picture of a morning glory and post it around town asking if anyone has seen their flowers with their phone number as the contact info. Start an anti morning glory neighborhood watch group including signs, t-shirts and a catchy slogan about the harmful hallucinogenic effects of the flower. It would be really funny if you got a hold of a picture and photoshopped it to make it look like they've lost teeth and aged like a methhead.

    Or you could simply ignore them completely and go on with your life. Invite their neighbors and yours to a bbq in your backyard. Just block them out. If they try talking to you, yawn and stretch and stare off into the distance behind them and comment to yours about how pretty the sunset is or something or other.

    Ya' know, these people could simply be addicted to the LSD like effects of the morning glory and they're crashing big time. You may want to watch yourself.
    I don't know why,... it's just MUSS easier to pedal than the other ones.

  30. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by NateHawk View Post
    if it's going over the fence into your yard, it's fair game to cut it back whether they like it or not. it's also fair game to spray them with herbicide for that matter, because too much plant growth hanging on a fence can encourage rot or rust and bring it down faster. Some plants have holdfasts and tendrils that will actually physically break apart structures for that matter. They have no grounds to complain, really.

    I wouldn't plant anything invasive back there. You're asking for trouble for yourself if/when you want them out of your own yard.

    You might try something that smells bad, however. Female ginkgo trees smell horrendous. They're very hard to find for good reason. The smell is described as that of rancid butter or vomit.

    Skunk cabbage is another option. It's an early spring plant (that produces enough heat to melt snow) and tends to smell like rotting meat.

    There are a few tropicals that smell like rotting meat or corpses, if your climate would be acceptable for them.
    Yeah, no. If the fence is their property, they can do whatever they want to it. Obviously if it's your property then you have more rights but damaging others property is not lawful. Furthermore, if the plants existed at the time you bought the property you might not have many options. The law is somewhat crazy about property/boundary. Cutting trees/vegetation all depends on state law. Most will allow you to cut overhanging trees but then if you kill the tree...

  31. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Poe4soul View Post
    Yeah, no. If the fence is their property, they can do whatever they want to it. Obviously if it's your property then you have more rights but damaging others property is not lawful. Furthermore, if the plants existed at the time you bought the property you might not have many options. The law is somewhat crazy about property/boundary. Cutting trees/vegetation all depends on state law. Most will allow you to cut overhanging trees but then if you kill the tree...
    This ^. Also, if you plant noxious smelling plants the impact will affect you too. I spose you could get fans to blow it towards their house, but then you may not like the next electric bill.
    I don't know why,... it's just MUSS easier to pedal than the other ones.

  32. #32
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    Re: Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    If you are allowed to have barnyard fowl in your town...Build a chicken coop and get a Rooster.

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  33. #33
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Thanks folks. Lots of good ideas. We'll be busy for a while.

    Ordering up the Liquid A$$ tonight.


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    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  34. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRed390 View Post
    As we say on another forum when neighbor-related problems come up.... Bang his wife!
    I think I know the forum you're talking about, but I quit going there a while back.
    Chasing bears through the woods drunk with a dull hatchet is strongly not advised

  35. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by GEARHEAD_ENG View Post
    If you are allowed to have barnyard fowl in your town...Build a chicken coop and get a Rooster.
    If I was the offending neighbor then this strategy would work wonders.
    Some years ago I lived a few houses down from a residence with a rooster and that fackin' bird about killed me. I really can't believe that those animals are legal in so many cities.

  36. #36
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    you didn't kill the morning glory - when it goes dormant you are supposed to cut it back to the ground (I've had morning glory).

    If it's the annual variety you can still prune the holy hell out of it.

    your neighbors are retarded and did something stupid....let them know that.
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  37. #37
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    You could always use the old classic of a flaming bag of shyte on the doorstep. Then you can hear them really lose their minds.

  38. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by Poe4soul View Post
    Yeah, no. If the fence is their property, they can do whatever they want to it. Obviously if it's your property then you have more rights but damaging others property is not lawful. Furthermore, if the plants existed at the time you bought the property you might not have many options. The law is somewhat crazy about property/boundary. Cutting trees/vegetation all depends on state law. Most will allow you to cut overhanging trees but then if you kill the tree...
    it's a shared fence - both owners are responsible for it.

    any plants that lean/creep over onto your property can be pruned back...jut don't kill'em in the process.
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  39. #39
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    Battle not with monsters...

    Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.

    Friedrich Nietzsche

    I would apologize, and offer to plant some new flowers.

    Because it doesn't matter who is right or wrong some times; you have to live next to one another for the foreseeable. Plus, you and your wife will benefit from the flowers, too.

  40. #40
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Quote Originally Posted by CHUM View Post
    you didn't kill the morning glory - when it goes dormant you are supposed to cut it back to the ground (I've had morning glory).

    If it's the annual variety you can still prune the holy hell out of it.

    your neighbors are retarded and did something stupid....let them know that.
    That's what we're thinking. However they are way too wound up and irrational for us to communicate that to them.
    As for the plant growing over the fence, they told us when we moved in that we could cut it back whenever we wanted. And we did that - last summer. It never grew over the fence this year, so it was never an issue for us.


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  41. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post
    Why make their lives uncomfortable? Won't that just give you guys a lot of stress? What would be your ultimate goal? I would apologise for what happened to their flowers, obviously something was done that killed em off, whether intentional or not, and get on with your lives. You seem to have a good thing going with the other neighbors, so make the most of that and try and ignore the ones out back. Life is too short to fill it with the kind of antagonism you mention.
    +1
    I cant believe the amount of negativity and stooping that people suggest.
    Really? Not one of those vindictive suggestions is going to lead to ANY pleasantness. NONE.
    So what's the point? To prove you can too can be a 'crazy azzed neighbor' ??

    Follow of a couple of the middle of the road posts and it'll all work out.
    Plant some privacy shrubs and ignore them, and enjoy the company of the nicer people.

    My wife wants to move because we have some royal POS tards across the street.
    Fine I said. Pick me a street where you KNOW everyone is perfect....Because god knows, from the outside everyone here looks normal, until tard-neighbor is SHRIEKING out the front window 'HEY AZZHOLE' when her husband ignores her.....You never know.


    Grow a pair and go through life trying to be the better person. Anything else is a cop out.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Flat Again??? View Post
    I would apologize, and offer to plant some new flowers.

    Because it doesn't matter who is right or wrong some times; you have to live next to one another for the foreseeable. Plus, you and your wife will benefit from the flowers, too.
    Quote Originally Posted by CdaleTony View Post
    +1
    I cant believe the amount of negativity and stooping that people suggest.
    Really? Not one of those vindictive suggestions is going to lead to ANY pleasantness. NONE.
    So what's the point? To prove you can too can be a 'crazy azzed neighbor' ??

    Follow of a couple of the middle of the road posts and it'll all work out.
    Plant some privacy shrubs and ignore them, and enjoy the company of the nicer people.

    My wife wants to move because we have some royal POS tards across the street.
    Fine I said. Pick me a street where you KNOW everyone is perfect....Because god knows, from the outside everyone here looks normal, until tard-neighbor is SHRIEKING out the front window 'HEY AZZHOLE' when her husband ignores her.....You never know.


    Grow a pair and go through life trying to be the better person. Anything else is a cop out.
    CDT
    Listen to these guyz.

    Peace is where you make it. Those people only hold the power over you that YOU yourself grant them.

    Be the change you want to see.

  43. #43
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    I think you missed the sarcasm in pretty much every "bad" response.

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    "don't underestimate the power of the dark side"

  45. #45
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Quote Originally Posted by Flat Again??? View Post
    I would apologize, and offer to plant some new flowers.

    Because it doesn't matter who is right or wrong some times; you have to live next to one another for the foreseeable. Plus, you and your wife will benefit from the flowers, too.
    I agree with this post. It's absolutely not worth the stress of falling out badly with your neighbours, all it does is eat you up inside and take over your life. Chances are they'll calm down with time to reflect.

    One of my friend's fell out with her next door neighbours over a boundary dispute several years ago. Since then it's got worse and worse with the neighbour even going so far as cutting down my friend's wooden fence with a chainsaw one afternoon.

    Because of the boundary dispute they're going to be meeting each other in court later this year, incurring serious legal fees all round. All over a tiny scrap of land. The only discussion for the last few years has been solely about this dispute, to the exclusion of everything else. There's so much bitterness over such a petty thing.

    Don't end up in that situation if you can help it.

  46. #46
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    I think this thread is somewhat schizophrenic. Although the OP has a real problem with his neighbors I think he was looking to have some fun with the OC folks. So some people are posting serious (and helpful) responses whereas others are throwing out the usual OC irrelevance. Don't take these posts too seriously, its all fun here.

    Right now I'm working on a solution that will include hookers, whoopee cushions and bags of manure. That'll get 'em good, real good.

  47. #47
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Quote Originally Posted by nwbikur View Post
    I think this thread is somewhat schizophrenic. Although the OP has a real problem with his neighbors I think he was looking to have some fun with the OC folks. So some people are posting serious (and helpful) responses whereas others are throwing out the usual OC irrelevance. Don't take these posts too seriously, its all fun here.

    Right now I'm working on a solution that will include hookers, whoopee cushions and bags of manure. That'll get 'em good, real good.
    Irreverence?

    You say that but chances are Brewtality's neighbours have suffered a sense of humour bypass. At this very moment his neighbour's 50 sledneck cousins will be piling into their pick up trucks to head down and sort this out for good. They'll have their adult diapers on to minimise rest stops and be posting twitter updates as they reach each state boundary.

    http://www.time.com/time/magazine/ar...587281,00.html

    .

  48. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by nwbikur View Post
    I think this thread is somewhat schizophrenic. Although the OP has a real problem with his neighbors I think he was looking to have some fun with the OC folks. So some people are posting serious (and helpful) responses whereas others are throwing out the usual OC irrelevance. Don't take these posts too seriously, its all fun here.

    Right now I'm working on a solution that will include hookers, whoopee cushions and bags of manure. That'll get 'em good, real good.
    He gets it.
    I am looking to have some fun here, not really get even. Maybe torment them a little, but mostly see what kind of crazy sh!t the OC can offer.


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    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  49. #49
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    Re: Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    Quote Originally Posted by CHUM View Post
    you didn't kill the morning glory - when it goes dormant you are supposed to cut it back to the ground (I've had morning glory).

    If it's the annual variety you can still prune the holy hell out of it.

    your neighbors are retarded and did something stupid....let them know that.
    You are correct... Morning Glorys are ANNUALS so if you get a drought or frost they won't come back. Educated your neighbors with your intelligence and buy them a $10 Perennial variety, like a Clematis.

    http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clematis



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  50. #50
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    put a house for sale by owner sign on their lawn, with their phone number. who knows maybe they will move.
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
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  51. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by scottap2003 View Post
    I think you missed the sarcasm in pretty much every "bad" response.
    I found your problem right there...

  52. #52
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    In all seriousness, since they've lived there longer and have had the flowers before you got there, you'd think they'd know how to take care of them. Just let everything cool down before offering help or replacing the flowers. Maybe other things are going wrong in their life and you and your wife got the brunt of it that day. It sounds like you haven't had problems with them before until the flower issue so it's odd that they freaked out on you.

    Apparently I have bindweed and your neighbors have the pretty ones. You can come kill mine anytime you want. I think morning glories are ugly, so you can replace mine with a climbing rose bush or jasmine.

  53. #53
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    UPDATE: Escalation Has Occurred

    I got home from work this evening to find lines of dead grass in my front lawn. My lawn has always been a little yellow, but not dead.
    These are clearly defined lines of dead grass, that were not there yesterday.
    Round Up.

    So am I still supposed to just take the morale high road?
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

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    Awesome development. These people are definitely willing to escalate

  55. #55
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    How straight are the lines? Maybe a game of Tic Tac Toe?

    Sorry to hear that, these people are obviously idiots, if it was in fact them.

    Since we've been subjected to a Nietzsche quote, why not some Mark Twain...
    Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
    I don't know why,... it's just MUSS easier to pedal than the other ones.

  56. #56
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    Burning thermite on the hoods of your neighbours cars. That should bring things back about even.
    QUOTE from MTBR.COM: You have given Brewtality too much Reputation in the last 24 hours, try again later.

  57. #57
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brewtality View Post
    I got home from work this evening to find lines of dead grass in my front lawn. My lawn has always been a little yellow, but not dead.
    These are clearly defined lines of dead grass, that were not there yesterday.
    Round Up.

    So am I still supposed to just take the morale high road?
    Well? What does it spell? :P

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  59. #59
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    Wow. These people really sound unhinged. Actually I would be careful. Maybe get some motion activated security cameras?

  60. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by girlonbike View Post
    Well? What does it spell? :P
    Nothing yet. Just a few random lines. I'm thinking it might become more clearly defined in the next day or two.
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  61. #61
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    Set up some cameras around your house. Then just ignore them. If they are doing something it will soon show up on camera. Bam then they are busted. Let the cops deal with it.
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  62. #62
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    Get some out of tune 7th graders to practice Crazy Train in your garage as needed. You don't even need to be there and can go ride.
    Ripping trails and tipping ales

  63. #63
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    Ripping trails and tipping ales

  64. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by CdaleTony View Post
    +1
    I cant believe the amount of negativity and stooping that people suggest.
    Really? Not one of those vindictive suggestions is going to lead to ANY pleasantness. NONE.
    So what's the point? To prove you can too can be a 'crazy azzed neighbor' ??

    [snip]



    Grow a pair and go through life trying to be the better person. Anything else is a cop out.
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    Quote Originally Posted by scottap2003 View Post
    I think you missed the sarcasm in pretty much every "bad" response.
    THIS ^^^

    - what are you doing in this neck of the woods anyways?
    No action in the crackenfail threads?
    Honestly... ahh I give up

  65. #65
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    Brewtal - on a serious note (and I'm no 'cop caller' in general), I might think about filing a report of what has transpired so far
    Honestly... ahh I give up

  66. #66
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    Take pictures of your yard and document EVERYTHING for police reports or in case the cops show up at your house because they made a complaint saying you're destroying their property. Obviously this couple is totally convinced you did something to their flowers. Come on..they are stupid weeds, not a 100,000 dollar irreplaceable exotic rare species of flower.

    Don't do anything to their side of the property or antagonize them as they've probably added cameras/motion sensors to the yard hoping to trap and drag your butt to jail. Let them rot in their own selfishness. You have better things to do than deal with some stupid overrated flowers. Getting the neighbors on your side will make this situation much easier to deal with.

    On the other hand, put lines in their yard..burnt ones that have cult symbolisms and call the police convinced they are a cult practicing devil worshiping and you heard a young girl screaming the other night but thought it was them having loud sex in the back yard until you woke up to find this.

  67. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brewtality View Post
    I got home from work this evening to find lines of dead grass in my front lawn. My lawn has always been a little yellow, but not dead.
    These are clearly defined lines of dead grass, that were not there yesterday.
    Round Up.

    So am I still supposed to just take the morale high road?
    Take pictures and document it, this will end up in small claims court.

  68. #68
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    If the dead grass in your lawn spells 'GFY', they are obviously members here and have been reading these posts... they just beat you to the punch!

    It does seem strange that the Morning Glory suddenly died off after being cut back. Was there a particularly bad cold spell? It also seems like there's a disconnect here somewhere, as you said you and they were chatting amiably before all this, and then the switch flipped. That does not really compute unless they are both going thru some serious personal stuff that caused this erratic behaviour, or you did something else in the meantime, knowingly or unknowingly, to aggravate them in some way.
    Sounds like you are already involved to a degree that will color your serenity, so get cameras to prove it is them messing with your property before you do anything. It could just be a pissed off squirrel pissing on your grass cos someone put a house on his space...
    It's all Here. Now.

  69. #69
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    A pissed off squirrel? I'd sooner go with aliens.
    Yes, still think you should take the high road. Unless you want it to escalate. Think a low life coward would do spiteful sneaky sh!t behind your back. Reacting to these low life cowards just confirms for them that they got you, and it worked. If they picked up their hands, now that's another story.
    Think a smart person would change the coarse in their favor, or at least be prepared for what comes next. Do something like this threads title suggests, and you're no better than them, and shouldn't be surprised by what you get in return.
    Round and round we go

  70. #70
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post

    It does seem strange that the Morning Glory suddenly died off after being cut back. .
    Some plants will die if you trim them down during a certain time of year or during a certain part of their growing cycle.

  71. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by rockerc View Post
    It does seem strange that the Morning Glory suddenly died off after being cut back. Was there a particularly bad cold spell?
    We cut the morning glory back last year, June 2012. It didn't die until this year. I don't see a connection. And when we cut it back, it was only back to the top of the fence.

    Talk about affecting my serenity, I heard a noise out front last night and went running to investigate, AR in hand. Ya, I'm a little paranoid right now and I'm not going to do anything to escalate this situation.





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  72. #72
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    [QUOTE=Brewtality;10448273]I got home from work this evening to find lines of dead grass in my front lawn. My lawn has always been a little yellow, but not dead.
    These are clearly defined lines of dead grass, that were not there yesterday.
    Round Up. [QUOTE]

    I say nail the doors shut while they are inside and then set their house on fire.....it works every time.
    Ahhhh...Ahhhh....it's the hammy, it's the hammy!!

  73. #73
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brewtality View Post
    We cut the morning glory back last year, June 2012. It didn't die until this year. I don't see a connection. And when we cut it back, it was only back to the top of the fence.

    Talk about affecting my serenity, I heard a noise out front last night and went running to investigate, AR in hand. Ya, I'm a little paranoid right now and I'm not going to do anything to escalate this situation.





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    Yep, that sounds alot safer than "dodging bullets" in GDL.

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  75. #75
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brewtality View Post
    We cut the morning glory back last year, June 2012. It didn't die until this year. I don't see a connection. And when we cut it back, it was only back to the top of the fence.

    Talk about affecting my serenity, I heard a noise out front last night and went running to investigate, AR in hand. Ya, I'm a little paranoid right now and I'm not going to do anything to escalate this situation.
    Are you sure you didn't piss of another neighbor? Because this would be a classic psychopath move. Psychopath kills the morning glories; the neighbor yells at you. Psychopath roundup lines in your grass; you escalate with the neighbor. The whole time the psychopath is cleaning his garage waiting for the WWIII. That's the type of revenge you need to play. The one he doesn't suspect but messes with his life and head.

  76. #76
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brewtality View Post
    Nothing yet. Just a few random lines. I'm thinking it might become more clearly defined in the next day or two.
    Pictures for us, please!!

  77. #77
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    Yeah,

    This is no fun without pics...

    I've got Woodie Harrelson playing your rear neighbor, who's his wife? Goldie Hawn

    You could be like maybe Bruce Willis or something.... Your kids are the ones from the movie Spy kids.
    Hey Miraculous... Go Raiders ! .
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  78. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by nwbikur View Post
    Wow. These people really sound unhinged. Actually I would be careful. Maybe get some motion activated security cameras?
    This I would recommend getting cameras, they will help in the long run and might deter them from doing more.
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
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  79. #79
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    Chicken Bomb in the AC unit... nuff said...

    <iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/I8ip-cF_LhY" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  80. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by cyclelicious View Post
    Morning Glories will also get you high

    Click image for larger version. 

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    Morning Glory



    The seeds are very similar to LSD, both morning glory and Hawaiian baby woodrose seeds contain LSA (lysergic acid amide), a psychedelic similar to LSD but about one tenth of the strength. Most seeds sold at stores are coated with a substance designed to make you feel ill and the best way to consume it is to extract it or find untainted seeds. The effects can last up to 14 hours and apparently produce a dreamlike state.

    5 Plants That Can Get You High
    Cold be why they were so pissed.

  81. #81
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    Yeah, they suck, nothing on my neighbors though.

    Moved in 15 years ago. Our kids played together, etc.

    Then, "Peter" grew up, and turned 16.

    My wife started to notice a reduction in the number of undies she had. Not all of a sudden, sort of a slow, drop in numbers.

    We do the spinning laundry hanger of socks and undies, beats them up less than the dryer. It's right inside our back door, where the kids came and went. Never gave it a second thought.

    Fast forward a year, and now, it's obvious. She needed to go buy new panties, and bras, as she was unable to go for more than two days now.

    Several silk nighties were missing too.

    To put it mildly, way too many missing for it to be the dryer monster, stuff slipping behind the washer, etc.

    Bought a bunch. Actually had some fun going with her, but that's another story.....

    So, less than a month later, half of that NEW haul, is gone.

    We'd been joking about the fact that it was "Peter". Why? Because he was always hanging around, acting kinda goofy, but hey, kids do that, right?

    Our son is home from school one day, wasn't supposed to be. Mom comes home from work, and leaves to go out for her afternoon jog. We never lock the house, we live in the country after all. He's upstairs, reading, and hears footsteps on the stairs. Waits till he hears our beadroom door open, and goes to confront, you guessed it, "Peter", with his hand in my wifes top drawer.

    He runs, cops are called, and then it gets ugly. Parents rally round him, their little boy isn't a pervert, he'd never do such a thing, we are horrible people for even suggesting this.

    My wife is out close to $1K in skivvies, girls, you know how $$$ that stuff gets......

    She has to see him in school, we have to see the parents daily, etc.

    Our house and cars have been defaced, yeah, it rocks.

    I feel for anyone with douchey neighbors, this crap is for the birds.
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  82. #82
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    Apparently... You haven't upped the retaliation enough to stop the douchebaggery.
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  83. #83
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    Douchebaggery doesn't work, it's for children. If you want to end it confrontation is the way to go. Maybe the only wise words ever spoken by Iron Mike Tyson, "everybody has a plan, until they get punched in the face" .
    Not saying to do that, but face to face makes it real and gains respect.

    Called the cops? It was and coulda been over as soon as he was busted.
    Round and round we go

  84. #84
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    Scorched Earth policy. That is all.

  85. #85
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    Uhm, wow. So did he stuff it all in his top drawer? I'll bet his parents are a bit on the conservative side and don't even let him look at the magazine rack at the local grocery store fearing the devil may tempt him to read Seventeen. Hormones, sheesh.
    I don't know why,... it's just MUSS easier to pedal than the other ones.

  86. #86
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    Well that just nutts... I'm not sure how I would have reacted. The parents must have found his "stash", right? Or, what do you think he did with all the undies? They have to be somewhere.
    "We can always find excuses if we want to find them, but if we really want to do something, we have to just go."

  87. #87
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    Quote Originally Posted by MendonCycleSmith View Post
    Yeah, they suck, nothing on my neighbors though.

    Moved in 15 years ago. Our kids played together, etc.

    Then, "Peter" grew up, and turned 16.

    My wife started to notice a reduction in the number of undies she had. Not all of a sudden, sort of a slow, drop in numbers.

    We do the spinning laundry hanger of socks and undies, beats them up less than the dryer. It's right inside our back door, where the kids came and went. Never gave it a second thought.

    Fast forward a year, and now, it's obvious. She needed to go buy new panties, and bras, as she was unable to go for more than two days now.

    Several silk nighties were missing too.

    To put it mildly, way too many missing for it to be the dryer monster, stuff slipping behind the washer, etc.

    Bought a bunch. Actually had some fun going with her, but that's another story.....

    So, less than a month later, half of that NEW haul, is gone.

    We'd been joking about the fact that it was "Peter". Why? Because he was always hanging around, acting kinda goofy, but hey, kids do that, right?

    Our son is home from school one day, wasn't supposed to be. Mom comes home from work, and leaves to go out for her afternoon jog. We never lock the house, we live in the country after all. He's upstairs, reading, and hears footsteps on the stairs. Waits till he hears our beadroom door open, and goes to confront, you guessed it, "Peter", with his hand in my wifes top drawer.

    He runs, cops are called, and then it gets ugly. Parents rally round him, their little boy isn't a pervert, he'd never do such a thing, we are horrible people for even suggesting this.

    My wife is out close to $1K in skivvies, girls, you know how $$$ that stuff gets......

    She has to see him in school, we have to see the parents daily, etc.

    Our house and cars have been defaced, yeah, it rocks.

    I feel for anyone with douchey neighbors, this crap is for the birds.
    That, if anything else, should be enough to convince anyone to lock their doors.

    And around here there has been a rash of rural burglaries targeting the more remote areas where people don't lock up

  88. #88
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    It's mind blowing that these loser neighbors get away with so much even after complaints to the cops and documentations of proof that your neighbors are crappy. There's nothing anyone can do and that "Peter" gets away with 1000 dollars worth of underwear and you are the bad guy is disgusting. Same with the suddenly dead flowers that are nearly impossible to kill anyway. That's suspicious in it's own way.

    If "Peter" is still stealing underwear despite the door being locked I'd keep your wife's stuff in a separate place and give "Peter" some special underwear in the drawer with well deserved "itching problems", feminine hair removal product cream, double sided tape, or topical pain reliever cream that goes icy after a few minutes. Or stick loaded mouse traps in between the underwear so they go off when he paws through it.

    Tell him to get a job and buy his own pretty underwear and hide it from his dear mommy and daddy. Then he can get as frilly and lacy as he wants. No one bats an eye if a guy walks into Victoria Secrets and buys underwear anymore.

    Best of luck to both of you.

  89. #89
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    Quote Originally Posted by daves4mtb View Post
    sounds like a future congressman
    This^^

    Peter has a long career in politics waiting for him.


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    Free Peter!

  91. #91
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    Quote Originally Posted by highdelll View Post
    THIS ^^^

    - what are you doing in this neck of the woods anyways?
    No action in the crackenfail threads?
    I dont doubt there is sarcasm in some of the posts.....But certainly not all...
    I like the cameras idea.
    Good luck in the race to the bottom if you choose to escalate....Never ends well

  92. #92
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    Quote Originally Posted by CdaleTony View Post
    I dont doubt there is sarcasm in some of the posts.....But certainly not all...
    I like the cameras idea.
    Good luck in the race to the bottom if you choose to escalate....Never ends well
    Thanks for quoting highdells post, for some reason I don't see it, and it's comic gold!

    Yeah, was wandering around the OC before my ride last night, and stumbled across it. Figured it needed a dose of other stories....

    No escalation on our part. Since the original call to the cops, there's been two more, so there is a well documented case, and if something were to happen to "Peter" or his family and their stuff, it would take the cop less than a minute to walk from their house, to mine. Not a difficult line to draw, not at all.

    Any cop worth his salt would, of course, wish to high five me, but due to constraints of the job, I'd likely end up in the paper.

    The rest of the story, (since his family cropped up in a few responses)?

    Pure white trash. The type that airs their dirty laundry in the back yard for all to hear. Kid has been abused verbally, since he was old enough to walk. His older sibling got it too. Once they got a bit older, they started to roll sh*t downhill onto younger too, share the love, you know? Plenty of swearing, insults, personal attacks, "you're a fat f*cking stupid piece of sh&t ***#ot", "shut the f*ck up you're so f*cking stupid", you know, that sort of thing, nice, uplifting stuff.

    We helped the kid out, Gave him a place to hang that was safe and sane, took him out with us for dinner, on bike rides, to the fair, stuff like that. We've known him since he was like, 4. He'd show up at our door when the yelling got louder, which was several times a week.

    With that added info, you can start to see how it would get difficult to deal with.

    Cops couldn't do anything, since when the original event happened, he was still a minor, and if the parents wouldn't agree, nothing to do. Subsequent events don't have witnesses, but I can't imagine anyone else in this sleepy little community who would steal from our cars on the same night that poorly spelled racial slurs, swear words (even the C word, only place on my wifes car) were written in marker on fence, house, cars, etc. No witness, no charges. Just documented.

    He's now 21, has a vehicle which gets louder by the day, and the throttle is JUICED every time he drives by our house. Often words thrown out the window too.

    Sells drugs to kids in town, doesn't have a job, still lives with Mom and Dad, (older sibling got out, obviously the smarter one) weighs about 250, and looks like a walking heart attack.

    Sadly, I'm going with, your actions will be your undoing. Anything else (and believe me, I've wracked my brain) would just peg me as the perp, and achieve a "HA HA" from the family up the road.

    Wife worked in the school too, got accosted by the parents for not gifting their sweetie a passing grade in English. Quote, "he ain't gonna need no f*cking Shakespeare or poetry to do what he's gonna do, why the f*ck you gotta make him read that crap if he don't want to?" Yeah, quality parents there.....

    Ain't neighbors grand?
    This is a Pugs not some carbon wannabee pretzel wagon!!

    - FrostyStruthers



    www.mendoncyclesmith.com

  93. #93
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    You assume people like that would call the cops if you retaliated? If the son is dealing drugs out of their house calling the cops is the last thing they will do.

    Game on.

  94. #94
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    Crazy Azzed Nieghbors

    MCS, it sounds like the same family that's living behind me, just 15 years younger.
    I have heard the parents screaming expletive laced rants at their kids, a 7 year old girl and 3 year old boy.


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  95. #95
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    Sounds like your neighbors lived next door to us for a year. Expletives shouted at full volume at small children in the backyard. It's incredible how well voices carry over water (we live next to a small lake). Thankfully they were renting and the owner refused to renew their lease. They were so angry with the entire neighborhood for constantly complaining about them...
    I'm enjoying my childhood way too much to ever give it up.

  96. #96
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRingGrinder View Post
    You assume people like that would call the cops if you retaliated? If the son is dealing drugs out of their house calling the cops is the last thing they will do.

    Game on.
    This assumes a certain level of intelligence, one that says to you, "hmm, we're kind of exposed here, perhaps calling the cops is a bad idea...."

    He doesn't sell out of the house actually.

    He gets a call, and screws out f the driveway at top speed, to meet up with his customer at a gas station in town, seen it multiple times. Why the owners allow it, is beyond me.

    Welcome to 'Murica....
    This is a Pugs not some carbon wannabee pretzel wagon!!

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  97. #97
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    Whatever, as you proclaim there's so many sh!tty people in his life. When you had the upper hand, a chance to offer some compassion, guidance, or to simply show kindness, maybe be part of his solution, or at least set an example of how people can be cool, out of fear, and concern over yourself, you called the cops and now are part of his problems.
    Round and round we go

  98. #98
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    I see a couple of options:

    1) think about the consequences of whatever you do, in advance.
    2) keep things interesting and take the consequences, as they come, as a surprise

    My dad did his life's work delivering milk and dairy stuff to shops, schools, etc. One day, a shopkeeper lady kept ranting and complaining for a long time, while he was doing the delivery there. When the ranting ceased, he asked her in a mild tone: "Do you have any other worries?" The lady burst out laughing, and gave him coffee and a pastry every working day for the next 20 years, or so.

    "it IS possible that you are faster or slower than anybody else who is having at least as much if not more or less fun"

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    Quote Originally Posted by theMeat View Post
    Whatever, as you proclaim there's so many sh!tty people in his life. When you had the upper hand, a chance to offer some compassion, guidance, or to simply show kindness, maybe be part of his solution, or at least set an example of how people can be cool, out of fear, and concern over yourself, you called the cops and now are part of his problems.
    Yeah, usually nothing ends up well when a cop shows up. At least that's been my experience. I would have started with lock my doors. Problem probably would have been solved then and there.

  100. #100
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    Quote Originally Posted by theMeat View Post
    When you had the upper hand, a chance to offer some compassion, guidance, or to simply show kindness, maybe be part of his solution, or at least set an example of how people can be cool, out of fear, and concern over yourself, you called the cops and now are part of his problems.
    Hmmm......

    Perhaps you missed the part where we gave him a place to come hide/escape his crappy situation, for close to a decade? Add to that, my wife being in special ed, helping both he, and his brother with school work, which they (naturally and pretty normally, rebelled against), only to then be rewarded with what amounted to a fairly serious amount of theft over an extended period of time (so not a singular, "bad choice" event), not to mention a healthy dose or perversion, and my wife feeling pretty violated?

    Ask the women in your life, what they would have done, and get back to me with your high horse.....

    Man, didn't expect that one at all.

    I suppose the flowers should have been replanted and tended to, in perpetuity at the OP's expense, in your world??
    This is a Pugs not some carbon wannabee pretzel wagon!!

    - FrostyStruthers



    www.mendoncyclesmith.com

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