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  1. #1
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    Craziest thing you've seen someone do while driving?

    So whats the craziest thing you've seen someone doing while driving?

    I have two, both from my time in Detroit:

    1) It was late at night (like 2:00 a.m.) and I was driving back to campus from the city, when I come up to a car ahead of me, driving 10-15mph below the limit and swerving gently within the lanes. We were like the only two cars on the road. I think "Oh great, a drunk" and speed up to pass. I get close to the car and see a glow coming from inside the car . . . as I pass the car, its one older dude driving with one hand on the wheel and an LCD on the dash playing PORN. I can only imagine where the other hand was . . . .

    2) While driving to work, well within the city limits, I merge onto the freeway and look to the car next to me, and I see a younger white guy driving actually shooting-up while driving. No joke. Syringe in his mouth, left arm extended with an underhand grip on the wheel, belt around the bicep with the right hand drawing it taught. I watched up to the point where he put the needle in his arm and I immediately exited the freeway. I was floored.
    Alcohol may lead nowhere, but it sure is the scenic route!

  2. #2
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    Some crazy stuff 007 typical of a city like Detroit I spent many years driving all the freeways in southern California. And you become numb to the shit you see. In fact I saw so much I apparently blocked it all out, because I'm drawing a blank.
    Front Range, Colorado.

  3. #3
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    A few times I've seen a gal going down on her man and the guy was swerving a bit each time. The last time I saw it happening was on hwy 247 in the desert and the guy must have just finished because she got back up into her seat I could clearly see her wiping her face off.

  4. #4
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    We used to have a college boy party wagon. It was a '68 Mercury Commuter. For those of you that are not familiar with this hawg of a vehicle, it's freakin' huge, long, and rides very low to the ground. Of course, that didn't stop us from going offroading on road trips. We smashed the tail pipe flat by bottoming out on it on several occasions. Anyway, it was a dull golden brown color and I painted black racing stripes down the sides including a hand painted "390" emblem on both front fenders. This thing had some balls considering how hulking heavy it was. It had a 390 cubic inch motor with a big 4 barrel carb, all stock.

    On one road trip that I did not attend, my cousin (who owned it), got all pissed off about something in the usual road trip drunkin' manor and he kicked a big dent in one of the doors. He started laughing and kicked a big dent in the door next to the now dented door. The party escalated into a "kick the Commuter" binge and all attending kicked dents into it until it was completely rippled from front to back. I about had a heart attack when I saw it and then I started laughing.

    As time went on, we began to scratch little inscriptions into the paint of locations and dates of our adventures. It got to the point where we would come back the car where it was parked after having lunch or something and there would be a small crowd around it reading all the inscriptions.

    This is a case where everyone else saw the weirdest thing on the road.

    Oh, the memories...

  5. #5
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    I saw someone talking on a cellphone while riding his bike and walking his dog. He had the cellphone in one hand, the handlebar and dog leash in his other hand, and he had a baby on a bike mounted baby seat in front of him.

  6. #6
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    Myself and 3 friends (2 guys and 1 female) got dressed as nuns for Halloween. We were a big hit while we strolled around Church and Wellesley Streets (Gaytown in Toronto). We drew even more attention when we drove around the downtown in Kurt's volkswagen ... some people on the street pointed and laughed as we drove by and others walked right up to the car asking us to forgive their sins... and other things
    F*ck Cancer

    Eat your veggies

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Furball the Mystery Cat View Post
    I saw someone talking on a cellphone while riding his bike and walking his dog. He had the cellphone in one hand, the handlebar and dog leash in his other hand, and he had a baby on a bike mounted baby seat in front of him.
    I would have called 911 right there on the spot.

  8. #8
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    Craziest thing you've seen someone do while driving?

    I saw a chick sniffing her armpits right before she hit me in construction traffic.

    I have seen people watching movies on portable dvd players on the dash. No porn though.

    Have also seen the cell phone on the bike thing on numerous occasions.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by NateHawk View Post
    Have also seen the cell phone on the bike thing on numerous occasions.
    I do it, and I text while riding my bike, small town, ride on side streets and theres no cars. I also pick up pizza on my bike, hold them with my right hand so I still have the front brake to dump speed if I have too, I like hitting the corners with speed so the pizza boxes are clearly angled compared to the ground, people always ask how many I've dropped, zero. I always carry two at a time.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by jackbombay View Post
    I do it, and I text while riding my bike, small town, ride on side streets and theres no cars. I also pick up pizza on my bike, hold them with my right hand so I still have the front brake to dump speed if I have too, I like hitting the corners with speed so the pizza boxes are clearly angled compared to the ground, people always ask how many I've dropped, zero. I always carry two at a time.
    I'd like to see you doing that riding a wheelie.

  11. #11
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    Hmmm, my folding bike has really short chain stays and it pops wheelies super easy, but not having a hand on the rear brake is asking for trouble :-/

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by jackbombay View Post
    Hmmm, my folding bike has really short chain stays and it pops wheelies super easy, but not having a hand on the rear brake is asking for trouble :-/
    Balance the pizza on your head and then you will have two free hands for complete bike control during the wheelie ride all the way home.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by jackbombay View Post
    Hmmm, my folding bike has really short chain stays and it pops wheelies super easy, but not having a hand on the rear brake is asking for trouble :-/
    Aw come on, live dangerously, do you want to live forever or something?



    I've seen someone reading a newspaper while driving a couple of different times. Not really sure how they could see, but they were maintaining lane. Saw a man shaving once. Saw a woman using a eyelash curler once. Neither one of them was maintaining lane.
    I'm enjoying my childhood way too much to ever give it up.

  14. #14
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    Years back gf was giving me a "hummer" on a long car ride. I had cruise control engaged, so i wasnt all over the lane. The car in front of me WAS all over, assumed it was a drunk and moved to pass. Looked to my right as i pulled even and realized that guy was getting pleasured also! He saw me at about the same time and figured out i was too.

    We did an air high five and i drove off.

  15. #15
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    saw a small dog sitting on the driver's lap eating out of his mouth once...

  16. #16
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    a few years ago in houston on loop 610 merge overpass to Interstate 45 north during rush hour, a woman walking against the low railing of the overpass with a small mattress. this is an elevated section of freeway far from on/off ramps so her entrance and exit to this spot was a mindfck. grant it someone may have dropped her and her mattress off but almost impossible w/o a shoulder and at rush hour.

  17. #17
    No Stranger to danger....
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    Ive seen a guys hairy ass hanging out the back seat passengers window, he was sharting and shitting into the air and it was all over the side of the car, the two guys in the front were laughing their heads off.
    Dont ever let the truth get in the way of a funny story....

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tone's View Post
    Ive seen a guys hairy ass hanging out the back seat passengers window, he was sharting and shitting into the air and it was all over the side of the car, the two guys in the front were laughing their heads off.
    hopefully you weren't behind them
    Quote Originally Posted by Optimus View Post
    There's some strange folk out there 'bouts. They have no sense of humor.
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  19. #19
    see me rollin, they hatin
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    wow, i cant top those. but i've peed in a cup in an intersection. when the light turned green i pinched it off and spilled pee on my seat. This isnt the only time i've done this, as i have bladder issues.

    you're welcome tones
    fap

  20. #20
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    Been the recipient and seen the hummer while driving. Gnarliest, though, for me, was on Sunset Blvd. Dude driver was definitely getting some action below the belt... but the weird part was when a guy popped up in the passengers seat, from doing the deed. Probably happens all over the world, just seeing it is believing.

  21. #21
    007
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tone's View Post
    Ive seen a guys hairy ass hanging out the back seat passengers window, he was sharting and shitting into the air and it was all over the side of the car, the two guys in the front were laughing their heads off.
    Thats funny. I have a somewhat similar story . . . I was not in the car (fortunately) but the story is legendary among my circle of friends. Two of them were on their way to a concert, and the traffic to get into the lot was pretty intense. The passenger had started drinking along the way and had to pee, apparently quite badly. Well with traffic so bad and an abundance of people (including police) everywhere, he couldn't exactly get out of the car. Well the driver had a few beers that he was saving for the show, and it was the only container in the car . . . so the passenger (already drunk and having to pee) decides "Hey, I'll slam this beer and piss in the bottle!"

    Well . . . he slams the beer, starts pissing in the bottle only to realize that he's gonna overflow the bottle. Long story short, not wanting or able to stop, he ends up pissing all over the INSIDE of the car (which was the drivers' dad's ride), laughing hysterically with my friend in the drivers seat panicking and freaking out the whole time. I can only imagine the hilarity.
    Alcohol may lead nowhere, but it sure is the scenic route!

  22. #22
    see me rollin, they hatin
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    my friend and i used to drive by the one of the scuzzier rapey bars in the city, where guys would hang out on the patio and "holla". I'd be driving, while she hung her bare ass out the window while they hooted and hollered. Not sure why we did that, but in our minds, mooning is funny.
    fap

  23. #23
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    as for giving "mouth to mouth" directed at the lap while driving, i remember being a teenager with my bf doing that, and we passed his mom, and he waved. that was a little awk.

    then we ended up on a back road, all twisty, and he was seconds from accidently running over a group of cyclists. i dont know how distracted he was, but this was dark, on a twisty road with lots of hills, and the road was super narrow. it was a very dangerous place to be riding anyway, but seriously, i'm glad i wasnt responsible for an accident!
    fap

  24. #24
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    I saw a dude stand up in the seat of a Miata going down I25 and start kicking his gf while she was driving. It was unbelievable how fast traffic all jumped to the far left lane and slowed down, hoping not to hit him if she jerked the wheel and he fell out.

    I've also already shared this, but I yakked all over a CO state trooper's car while driving on I25.

  25. #25
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    I used to regularly roll joints while doing 65 on a 2-lane highway. Beer bottle between my legs.

  26. #26
    007
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jim Beam View Post
    I used to regularly roll joints while doing 65 on a 2-lane highway. Beer bottle between my legs.
    This just reminded me of my pizza delivery days. I was about 14 and worked at Pizza Hut with all of my buddies. There was this one guy who was a total 80's Hair Band leftover that had been a driver there for YEARS . . . he used to be able to roll a joint with one hand while driving. I was (and still am) thoroughly impressed!
    Alcohol may lead nowhere, but it sure is the scenic route!

  27. #27
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    Craziest thing you've seen someone do while driving?

    When I was a kid, my mom signed me up for a summer backpacking trip in the sierras. The leaders took us up in a couple of big 15 passenger vans. Lots of tight twisty mtn roads led to one kid getting sick. He didn't catch it in time and dove for one of the windows.
    Everybody know the back windows on vans don't open very far. He pushed his mouth out the narrow opening and let loose the techni-color yawn. Because we were still moving, the air flow blew the yack back inside the van, all over the back three rows of kids. It also coated the outside of the van.
    The backpacking trip was for 7 days. For those kids in the back rows, it was 7 long stinky barf encrusted days with out showers.
    When we returned to the trailhead, the stench inside the van was unreal. It had fermented in the hot summer sun for 7 days with no air circulation. The stuff on the outside actually peeled the paint in a couple places.
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  28. #28
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    Texting while driving. I see it every day and it is up there with the stupidity of driving drunk. Another one that gets me is those people who have their phones on speaker but still hold it up to their mouths... that's not hands free dummies (law in California to only talk on a hands free device while driving). /rant

  29. #29
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    More amusing than crazy but one time back when I was in Utah we were driving from Salt Lake up towards Strawberry Reservoir to do some hiking in the Uintah mountains. While going up a steep section of highway we were in the slow lane and from behind us this big, trashy, 70s model behemoth gas guzzling car accelerated hard past us. In the front seat were two trailer park-looking dudes with fishing poles in between them. But what was funny was that they had two TV dinners open, sitting on the huge dashboard, evidently warming them up in time to start their day of shore fishing!

  30. #30
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    Saw a chick giving a dude a blowjob on the freeway once but not that odd for me, as back in 2003 my wife did that to me on the freeway once… it was quite distracting driving like that, glad it was after midnight otherwise it’d have attracted a lot of attention.

    Seems like the highway blowjob is a common thing on these threads. Glad to be among fellow enthusiasts.
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  31. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leopold Porkstacker View Post
    Saw a chick giving a dude a blowjob on the freeway once but not that odd for me, as back in 2003 my wife did that to me on the freeway once… it was quite distracting driving like that, glad it was after midnight otherwise it’d have attracted a lot of attention.

    Seems like the highway blowjob is a common thing on these threads. Glad to be among fellow enthusiasts.
    Highway hummer.

  32. #32
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    Craziest thing you've seen someone do while driving?

    Road head
    Its all Shits and Giggles until somebody Giggles and Shits

  33. #33
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    Freeway Skully

  34. #34
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  35. #35
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    while living in bangkok i witnessed a woman nursing a baby while riding sidesaddle on the back of a scooter taxi as the driver careened through traffic at a high rate of speed.

    also saw an entire family of 6 and 3 live chickens on a 125cc moped.

    these were not isolated incidents. in fact, i saw more weird stuff on the motorways while living there than i have anywhere else in the world.
    "Knowledge is good." ~ Emil Faber

  36. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tone's View Post
    Ive seen a guys hairy ass hanging out the back seat passengers window, he was sharting and shitting into the air and it was all over the side of the car, the two guys in the front were laughing their heads off.
    Sounds like completely normal Australian behavior. Carry on... Nothing to see here.
    Posting on the basis that ignorance shared is ignorance doubled.

  37. #37
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    One weekend, on I 85 just outside of Atlanta, a minivan merged into traffic ahead of me with a queen size mattress on top of it. The front and back ends of the mattress were flapping wildly in the wind, especially the front, and they whole thing kept trying to lift up. Not so smart but not so odd if they only thought to tie it down in one place. But then I noticed the hands reaching up through the front windows, holding it down. At that point I decided I needed to be in front of these guys as soon as possible. Apparently everyone else came to that conclusion at the same time because there was a sudden surge of all the surrounding cars which all slowed back down once they got around it; and suddenly there was a long clear space behind the van across all 4 lanes. As I passed I noticed that both guys were very white faced and very white knuckled. But I also noticed that they didn't slow down any either, or take the next exit. They were seeing this through 'till the end, whatever that might be.
    I'm enjoying my childhood way too much to ever give it up.

  38. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by monogod View Post
    while living in bangkok i witnessed a woman nursing a baby while riding sidesaddle on the back of a scooter taxi as the driver careened through traffic at a high rate of speed.

    also saw an entire family of 6 and 3 live chickens on a 125cc moped.

    these were not isolated incidents. in fact, i saw more weird stuff on the motorways while living there than i have anywhere else in the world.
    Trucks are for lazy, unimaginative people!
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