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  1. #51
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    Quote Originally Posted by shamethellama View Post
    **** ****ing thanksgiving. **** it to hell. **** it, **** it, and **** you. I get to go see people I've only ever seen at other thanksgivings (my stepmom's family) and associate with them. Or not. I'd rather not. I literally don't know a single person's name in the entire house. Every year, they tell me their names, and every year, I forget. There's two tables. One for the "adults" and one for the "children" younger than about 30. I don't know about the adult's table, but I can tell you that there are a total of approximately 12 words said throughout the entire meal at the children's table. It's so ****ing awkward, dammit. Especially for my brother and I since we don't know any of these people and what the **** they're talking about when they do talk. I can't even pretend to watch the game and be interested because I know jack **** about football. I wish I could just get inebriated and **** it.

    Yes I'm ****ing grumpy. **** you.
    My advice is to weasel your way into sitting at the adult table and then talk politics. That or fart a couple times.

  2. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2wheelsnotfour View Post
    My advice is to weasel your way into sitting at the adult table and then talk politics. That or fart a couple times.
    HAHAHA. I lol'd.
    Instead of rims, put sundials on your wheels and run for the hills...

    P.O.S. Living Slightly Larger

  3. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2wheelsnotfour View Post
    My advice is to weasel your way into sitting at the adult table and then talk politics. That or fart a couple times.
    Someecards has you covered.


  4. #54
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    Call the family, tell them you have the flu and dont want to infect everyone. We will all meet at the trailhead at 10am Christmas morning. Wheels down at 10:15, don't be late!

  5. #55
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    I hate the holidays. Its an hour drive to my ex in laws house where my ex mother in law is a freeking nut case, ex brother in law just got out of prison for the 6th time, my ex wife who gained 200 lbs will be there of course. And there is Turkey! Who really likes Turkey? It's like eating cardboard soaked in bath water.

    The only good part is seeing my kids and 3 year old grandson. But then I leave and wont be seeing them for awhile, then the depression sets in. Some call it the holiday blues, I call it the dealing with FAT *****Y women trying to be annoyingly nice while reading the newspaper adds talking about shopping on black Friday while I was wishing I could log onto Jenson USA and order some new red grips and I guess I better order an Avid brake bleeding system while I'm there and what did that stem weigh?

  6. #56
    Swedetarded
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    No. No dread here.

    I live in Sweden. None of my family lives here. I can spend the holidays with the people I want to spend the holidays with. Thanksgiving for me will be very multinational and non-traditional.

    Now on the food side, I dread. Hours of base miles on the trainer are in my future.

  7. #57
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    Here's what we have planned, tonight...

    a-redneck-thanksgiving.jpg

    Anyone want to come over and join us?
    Contact information: http://about.me/marpilli

  8. #58
    "2 Wycked"
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    Quote Originally Posted by marpilli View Post
    Here's what we have planned, tonight...

    a-redneck-thanksgiving.jpg

    Anyone want to come over and join us?
    I'll come over, I need to bring my dog though (he loves fried chicken and cigarettes)
    Ahhhh...Ahhhh....it's the hammy, it's the hammy!!

  9. #59
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    I never buy gifts based on obligation. Good idea? Maybe not, but at least I'm genuine. Besides, I'm selfish and I'd much rather spend the money on myself.

  10. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazy03 View Post
    I'll come over, I need to bring my dog though (he loves fried chicken and cigarettes)
    Lol, we'll save a place for you and the dog...
    Contact information: http://about.me/marpilli

  11. #61
    GO JIMMIE!!
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    Anyone else a bit sick of the black Friday commercials?
    My Bike: '03 Specialized HardRock FrankenBike
    My Blog: http://http://kona0197.wordpress.com/

  12. #62
    Bro Mountainbiker
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    The Rebecca black one???
    Raised in a Chicken-Coop by Chickens

  13. #63
    dru
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    Crazy03, I feel your pain. Both my wife's and my families were completely nuts for us growing up. We make a conscious effort to avoid our families which of course makes us feel very guilty. Growing up was really bad for both of us so we've tried extra hard to right the universe by being loving to each other and our kids. Luckily they've had nice had childhoods and turned out OK.

    Drew
    occasional cyclist

  14. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mikecito View Post
    I work in retail, so to me the holidaze are something to survive.Very little time off and crazy hours. It's difficult to enjoy Thanksgiving or Christmas when you know the insanity you have to face the next day. That's why 4th of July is by far my favorite holiday. Food, Fun, Family, Friends and Fireworks. No presents, just warm weather and a good time.

    Now I'm depressed
    I feel for ya!

    My wife worked at Staples for 3 years. Retail is a no-fun-at-all job in the holiday season.

    I work for Little Pharma (a contract laboratory), and we get to work overtime between October and the end of December to help our customers finish up their R&D projects by the end of the fiscal year. So I'm dealing with all their screw-ups, plus our own and going nuts in the process. But I'm thankful to have a job.

    The major family craziness on my side of the family traces to my sister. She is not complete unless feuding with someone over some trivial nonsense, and it's my decade to be her enemy. At this point in the process, nothing is required from me to keep the hostility going, praise be.

    The local weather is allowing me to ride trails, not a given in the Midwest this time of year. My wife is happy because we're planning a trip to Peru over Christmas.

    Happy Holidays!

    Walt

  15. #65
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    Well, I survived the first holiday of the holiday season relatively unscathed with only one mishap. So, the turkey is done and ready to come out of the oven and my mom asks if I can take it out because it's too heavy for her so I do, pretty easy right? Well, she put the turkey in an aluminum pan to bake in the oven and filled it with the gravy and some kind of oil and spice mix to soak in while it cooked, so I reach in the oven and grab the pan by the little wire handles on each side and as I pick it up the entire pan buckles in the middle and the gravy and oil mix poured all over the oven including the heating elements on the bottom. Next, I sit the pan back in the oven to rethink my plan of attack, and wouldn't you know it, the godd*mn oil caught fire, so I reach in real quick grab the pan, yank it out of the oven fast as to not get burned effectively getting the remaining gravy and oil mix all over the kitchen. And for my efforts I was promptly yelled at "Look what you fu*cking did, whats wrong with you? The paper towels are over there".

    Next time I'll let the fu*cking place burn down.
    Ahhhh...Ahhhh....it's the hammy, it's the hammy!!

  16. #66
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    How's that saying go?

    "No kind act goes unpunished."

    The bird survived, you survived I'd call that a win. Don't sweat the small stuff.

  17. #67
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    Quote Originally Posted by CarolinaLL6 View Post
    How's that saying go?

    "No kind act goes unpunished."

    The bird survived, you survived I'd call that a win. Don't sweat the small stuff.
    "No good deed goes unpunished"

    I think for next year's festivities I'm gonna have a t-shirt made the reads "don't ask me for sh*t motherfu*ker"
    Ahhhh...Ahhhh....it's the hammy, it's the hammy!!

  18. #68
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    That's it. - heh not awake yet.

    They have the Epic Beard Man shirt. It may suffice.


  19. #69
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    I love this thread! I thought I was the only curmudgeon who keeps thinking "Merry ****ing Xmas". Other than downtime from work, I hate ****ing xmas. And who decided it should be in the middle of winter? I spent the first 30 years in the northeast US. Not going back to THOSE ****hole winters.

    Oh... Merry ****ing Xmas to those of you who like holidays.

    PS. SANTA ISN'T REAL!

  20. #70
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    Quote Originally Posted by CarolinaLL6 View Post
    That's it. - heh not awake yet.

    They have the Epic Beard Man shirt. It may suffice.

    Most of em already know that about me
    Ahhhh...Ahhhh....it's the hammy, it's the hammy!!

  21. #71
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    Quote Originally Posted by LiveFreeThenDie View Post
    PS. SANTA ISN'T REAL!
    Yes he is! It's that plastic in my wallet that's about to order a wheelset for me and the grown up kids of mine get a gift card from Walmart!

  22. #72
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    Hey eveyone, they are playing your song!

    The Grinch Song - YouTube


  23. #73
    High Gravity Haze
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    Last year's Christmas get together turned into a royal clusterf*k at my dad's house. Since then I've not spoken to my step brother or his wife and don't really plan to ever again if I can help it.

    My wife and I have chosen to ditch the entire family thing all together this year. I've not gone snow skiing since 1994, but by dammit that's what we'll be doing on Christmas day this year. Just me, her, the slopes, and some peace and quiet.

  24. #74
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    off from work for a month so no pressure here. write a few cards, pick up some wine, online shopping while sending the gift without wrapping. it's a beautiful thing.

  25. #75
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    The holidays pretty well piss me off. I don't like most of my family.....mine or my wife's.
    I don't like getting together with any of them, I don't like the big ass meals etc. etc.
    I don't like buying people **** for Christmas....I tell all our friends/family don't bother buying us anything because you aren't getting anything from us......if you choose to buy us something anyway.....tough **** we still aren't getting you something.

    I would rather everybody else piss off and let me spend the time with my wife and kids alone. We buy the kids gifts and celebrate for their sake....and I guess for my wife because she "believes".
    For the most part I refuse to have anything to do with any kind of religion and don't believe that there is any kind of "god" or higher power of any kind. I will play along with the christmas stuff until my kids are old enough to decide for themselves if they want to continue with it.

    Does that make me sound like an *******? Probably. Do I care? Not a damn bit.

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