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  1. #351
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    The other day I was riding to work (as I do most times on the 10 mile route). It is a mix of open straightaways with wide shoulders and hairpin no shoulders and ends in a city with wide laned one-way roads. Usually by the time I get to the city part it takes a bit of work to make it up the plateau but once on it I can finish the game above the 25mph speed limit(3 miles solid) on the mtb.
    This saturday morning I was riding in for some overtime work and as I got to the wide part of the first city limits hill a car wizzes past me at a couple inches. I gestured in disgust since he had 10 ft to the yellow line and had to hit a set of potholes to be that close. He pulls over in front of me, stops then waits for me to pass. Then pulled beside me with his passenger window down and procedes to give me a tirade of how I was blocking the lane and shouldn't be in the road. Well dressed middle aged white guy in a nice late model car, hardly the stereo type of the redneck of the area(We have a lot of them). The guy carried that on for 2 miles solid, meanwhile I was tailgating the car in front of me in the 2 lane one way section and cars were piled up behind him.

    I said "who's blocking?!"
    "You are. I have an engine!"
    "I have a camera. Stop harrassing me."
    "Screw the camera! I'm bigger" and swerved at me.

    He got a police report....

  2. #352
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollyw00d View Post
    "I'd like to go to the Gothic Castle"
    "Gothic A$$hole?"
    "That's what I said"


    "I just blue myself."
    I hate 650b because it's not as fun as 26 inch wheels and because it doesn't have the rollover ability of 29 inch wheels.

  3. #353
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    Loudly, "Go Potty" huh?!?! "Yeah you, go potty" "Go Potty!". I finally realized someone was outside trying to get a little dog to "Go Potty" in the cold, but perhaps he saw me turn his way and got caught up in the moment.

  4. #354
    weirdo
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    Quote Originally Posted by mtbxplorer View Post
    Loudly, "Go Potty" huh?!?! "Yeah you, go potty"
    Recalculating....

  5. #355
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    I had someone shout something at me the other day, but as they were coming towards me, all I got was a brief shriek of noise. I'm not sure why they bothered.....

  6. #356
    I need skills
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    hieroglyphics

    I was behind a car at stoplight. No car was next to me. A car was behind me. Light turns green and after a few seconds elapse, the car behind me guns his engine and flys by about a foot away from me. He had two full lanes to work with and that guy decides to see how close he can get to me.

    One block later I pass the same car stopped at another red light. The light turns green, he changes lanes and he does the same damn thing. WTF?

    A few miles later I see this same distinctive car parked, same coffee mug visible through the rear window, same bumper sticker.

    I think about bike safety, giving bikes 3 feet of space and decide I'd like to leave the driver a note. But I didn't have a pen. I settled for a studded tire and hieroglyphics.
    Last edited by cjohnson; 01-28-2013 at 04:41 PM.

  7. #357
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    I think I heard "GET A JOB!" today while I was riding to work. Not completely certain since I had one ear bud in but I laughed all the way to work.

  8. #358
    jrm
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    "one your left" in a sweet voice. Then she blew by me like i was standing still.

  9. #359
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    I got to do some yelling this morning.

    I'm stopped at an intersection waiting to turn left. The mitsubishi outlander that I'm waiting for pulls into the intersection...and then it stops. And then the driver looks down at something in her lap, while her car is sitting in the middle of an intersection, and completely blocking me.

    Neither of these are major roads, but c'mon. I'm maybe 15' directly to her left, with helmet and handlebar lights pointed right at her. It's a little below 0F, and I'm pretty toasty, but she doesn't know that - I could be freezing my ass off. So seriously, wtf?

    So I yell "W.T.F.?" "Goooooooooo!" And that gets her moving.

    But she's not moving very fast, because I get to follow her for almost 15 blocks. 15 blocks should be plenty of time to put some distance between yourself and a cyclist, but no. I get to watch her inexplicably driving down the middle of the road, faking left, faking right, and blowing through a stop sign. Then she spends 6 whole blocks driving on the complete wrong side of the road because...she's from england? Or she was intimidated by me and expected me to pass?

    As she's driving in the oncoming lane she reaches a tee-intersection where we both have to make a right, so of course she hits the brakes, jack-knifes her car at 45, and just sits there in the oncoming lane. I think she was waiting for me to pass on the right, except why would I pass someone who's obviously an idiot on the right. I just stop (in the correct lane) and yell "W.T.F.?" "Goooooooooo!" And thankfully that's where our paths diverged.

    I'm 100% sure that the reasonableness of my message was lost on her, but bellowing at her every time that she did something bafflingly and idiotically illegal sure made me feel good. Being lost is fine, but being an idiot about it is not.

  10. #360
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    You sir are a Richard that IS making us all look bad. Follow the law stupid.

  11. #361
    I Ride for Donuts
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    ^^ And you apparently have reading comprehension issues.


    Newf, Nice that you two got to hang out for so long.

    I passed at the opportunity to do some yelling yesterday... I was on a two lane highway, and I had crossed my lane and was moving at a pretty good clip in the left turn lane, about to make a left off of the highway. A car was coming at me in the other lane of the highway, but far enough away that if I kept my pace, I could make my left safely before he would have to worry about me...but he's going 60, so it's not like there's a lot of leeway there. So as I'm in the turn lane a guy pulls up to the stop on the street I'm turning onto wanting to turn left onto the highway. He looks left and sees the car coming, looks right and fully makes eye contact with me...waits a sec...and then starts to pull out to make his turn! So he's halfway out into the lane and he hits the brakes and stops...so now the only escape route for the oncoming car to avoid hitting him would be to go left and hit me. There's still time, so I hammer it and make my turn right in front of him, and kind of give him 'the look' and shake my head as I go by. I wanted to do some yelling, but I realized afterwards that I sort of know the guy from work, so I'm sort of glad I didn't.
    You have no excuse for driving to work
    (unless you don't have studded tires)
    (no excuse for that either)

  12. #362
    weirdo
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    That was an interresting follow, Newf. Thanks for relating it.

    Quote Originally Posted by CommuterBoy View Post
    I wanted to do some yelling, but I realized afterwards that I sort of know the guy from work, so I'm sort of glad I didn't.
    I believe it. You teach special ed, right?
    Recalculating....

  13. #363
    Unhinged Aussie on a 29er
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    On the way to work yesterday I was super grumpy from several consecutive days of sleep deprivation (2-3 hrs of sleep each night), due to a very sick girlfriend*. It's dark but there's a little ambient light, so visibility isn't great, and I can see someone ahead with a red light, and I can't see a face. The light isn't moving fast, so I thought it might be a walker, or a rider riding away from me. No, this idiot has a red light on the front of his bike, and was shielding his eyes from my light so I couldn't see that he was heading towards me. As I pass him, I reach to cover my lights as I realize he's riding towards me and he says, "A**hole".

    It's one of those days. I'm already pissed off & I lose my temper. I hit the brakes, turn the light off to be stealthy, turn around and ride up behind him. Right as I draw level, I put my arm around his shoulder and say, "Say that to my face."

    I didn't need to have my arm around his shoulder to see him jump. He pauses, startled, then started to say something about my light, and I interrupted, "I'm tired, pissed off and I'm deciding whether you're about to have a really f*cking horrible morning. So, say it to my face. I dare you."

    He seemed pretty freaked out at this point and said nothing. Might have mumbled something, but it sure as hell wasn't "A**hole".

    "You don't know a f*cking thing about me. Think twice before you insult a complete stranger, you don't know what they're going to do about it." I slowed, turned around and rode off in the opposite direction.

    I worked Telemarketing for over 4 years, inbound and outbound. I took a lot of abuse on the phones. I'm usually so ignorant about insults that my manager has had to step in at my current workplace to prevent situations getting out of control because I don't realise someone's insulting me at work. But this interaction, which I normally wouldn't post about nor am I proud of it, highlights a few things that I feel are important on this thread.
    1) It's probably not the smartest idea to insult or intimidate a complete stranger. I almost always have a knife close on hand. He could have been carrying concealed too. At that distance and position, an unhinged psychopath probably would have been able to really f*ck someone's day up before they could pull a gun.
    2) Corollary: Sometimes you just have to let it go. Some things aren't worth it. Bicycle rider with bright lights? Probably not worth it.
    3) Be kind to everyone you meet. I'm not saying that you should be a pushover, but don't be a d*ckhead about it either.
    4) For the love of god... If you absolutely must, only insult people who are slower than you or at the very least, not as lucky and/or skilled as you are. The other way around is just asking for trouble. Encouraging them to have bad behavior in front of a police officer is a form of luck/skill. In October 2011 I had a rider body check me twice after yelling abuse at me, attempting to ride me in to the curb. He was neither skilled nor lucky, and on top of a broken wrist he also had a police report filed against him.

    *EDIT: Clarification point here - she got the flu & has been having a bad case of sleep apnea, meaning she is either coughing, sneezing, or randomly stops breathing throughout the night. So yeah, things are kinda stressful at the moment.
    Last edited by hunter006; 01-31-2013 at 09:50 PM.

  14. #364
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    " S o o r r y"

    In a nice lilting Carribean accent, after almost pulling out of Cumby's into my path, and being chastised by me with an arm flung in his direction (kind of frisbee-throw-like). When he then pulled out and passed me slowly, I was sure I was in for an earful of abuse. But no, I think he truly was sorry.

  15. #365
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    "GET OFF THE ROAD" from some dope going down Main St. in the opposite direction, 100% unimpacted by my travels. I guess he spotted my lights well in advance, since he was able to roll down the window and come up with such a snappy remark before I was out of range.

  16. #366
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    While in the middle of a rain-soaked 11 mile commute, I had a guy in a pickup pull up along side me with a concerned look on his face, roll his passenger window down, and in a slow drawl ask: "Are you just ridin' for fun?". I started laughing and just said yeah. I laughed the rest of the way to work. I'm sure he was going to offer me a ride, but he actually kind of made my day. God bless him where ever he's at.
    Last edited by nemhed; 05-31-2013 at 10:29 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Skrufryder View Post
    Silly rabbit Jack Daniel drinking donkey kissing caterpiller

  17. #367
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    "Hi, bicycle!" in the cutest little preschooler voice.

  18. #368
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    censored post now makes little sense!

    the censor below "*******" is the other word for "bundle of sticks"

    a few weeks ago I was on an afternoon training ride in an area with tons of people doing the same and some dude in a brand new top of the line range rover with temporary plates slowed down and screamed "******" then sped off... why??? was he fed up with all the cyclists in the area or was it more manyl to scream an insult then run and hide than it is to ride a bike... so confused!
    Last edited by sasquatch2; 10-02-2013 at 06:11 AM. Reason: my post was censored...
    the upper echelon of mediocrity

  19. #369
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    Wow, surprising that nobody has been yelled at since 5/31!

    The offering to me today, from an SUV's backseat passenger, was "A skunk is chasing you". This may have actually been true, but I did not look back to check.

  20. #370
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    Was riding to work a month or so ago, stopped at a red light behind a Camry. Guy in a lifted pickup pulls up next to me and leans out his window and yells this piece of advice to me in a very thick eastern European accent: "HEY FRIEND! HOW ARE YOU? WATCH OUT FOR CAMRY DRIVER, ALWAYS WORST DRIVERS! YOU RIDE SAFE NOW YES AND HAVE A GOOD DAY!" And then he gave me a thumbs up as the light turned green and he drove off. Thank you loud, friendly Russian man in your lifted pickup.

    And then there were lots of mumbled bits gibberish from various irate suburbanites in their luxury sedans!
    2009 GT Sanction 2.0
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  21. #371
    MTB, Road, Commuting
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    Not a yell but I was in a group ride, supporting a cancer community center no less. The group was riding single file up a hill in a 35MPH zone and some a-hole in a decent looking car decided it would be a good lesson for us if he laid on the horn for the entire 10 seconds it took him to pass us. (a long time to be on the horn, a pretty short time out of this poor saps life) His mother must have beaten him as a child...I'm sure there are more people that would love to beat him as an adult too. Some people just suck.

  22. #372
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    "Get in the damn bike lane" spews Ms PMS out her passenger window.

    I grin back thinking "whatever" as I approach 3k miles flat free. . .

  23. #373
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    "there he goes... riding his bike..." from a girl sitting with a bunch of other teenagers as I rode through downtown just about home. It was either a very mellow insult, ironic, stoner comment or something but I took it as a compliment and I smiled at them. A week before that, a bunch of high-schoolers leaned out of their car window driving past and shouted YEAHHHHH as I was climbing a steep hill and I shouted back WOOHOO but felt really dorky so I promised myself to either wave or just smile next time...
    the upper echelon of mediocrity

  24. #374
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    I was stopped at a red light this morning. I heard a nasty “Get a car” and turned around to see a guy rolling up the passenger window. Seeing as his window was now closed I yelled back. Something along the lines of “What is wrong with you?” and “Moron” . Then I got “You shouldn’t be in the middle of the road” and the finger. I noticed he carefully shielded the finger from the driver, presumably his wife, who was clearly embarrassed at all the public fuss. Well FU too. And the light turned green.

  25. #375
    weirdo
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    Quote Originally Posted by mtbxplorer View Post
    Then I got “You shouldn’t be in the middle of the road” and the finger. I noticed he carefully shielded the finger from the driver, presumably his wife, who was clearly embarrassed at all the public fuss.
    That`s funny

    And the light turned green...
    Recalculating....

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