Results 1 to 42 of 42
  1. #1
    Bad Andy!
    Reputation: GIANTkiller's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    383

    The...You might be a redneck if...thread

    Alright - I cracked myself up with this one.
    It's going over pretty well on the dreaded FB as well.
    Modified here a little, but...

    If you drink boxed wine...from a throwback Broncos pint glass...from Arby's...while working on your bike...for entertainment...on a Friday night...
    YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK!!!




    What'yall got???


    This thread could also be the latest "drinking/listening to" thread.

    Drinking boxed wine - listening to 99.5 the mountain.

  2. #2
    I'm with stupid
    Reputation: hitechredneck's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    Posts
    4,938
    If you look like me........

    Or do Half of the dumb sh!t I have done in my day.

  3. #3
    mtbr member
    Reputation: Dose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    236
    Rednecks don't shop at REI.......Try Cabella's and what is that in the driveway. Where's the F-150

    You might be a "yuppie" if you drink your wife's boxed wine out of a vintage Broncos glass you got on Ebay.

  4. #4
    mtbr member
    Reputation: sbsbiker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    1,972
    Rednecks also work on their bikes flipped upside down that stand is way too pro for a redneck.

  5. #5
    mtbr member
    Reputation:
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    1,225
    My neck really is red.

  6. #6
    Bad Andy!
    Reputation: GIANTkiller's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    383
    The 4x4 sticker must count for something?
    And the Mongoose MTB???
    And maybe if you saw the mailbox behind that tree that is bungee'd to the post?



    And the rusty '79 Kawasaki 400 LTD in the background? Last licensed in '88.

  7. #7
    mtbr member
    Reputation: Dose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    236
    Keep trying!

    Might be time for a backup photo.

    All I see in the background is the suburbs.

  8. #8
    Bad Andy!
    Reputation: GIANTkiller's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    383
    ^^^ lulz.
    Lighten up.
    It's a joke.
    What'cha got Dose?

    I truly am the definition of yuppie - right - those that know me??!!

  9. #9
    mtbr member
    Reputation: Dose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    236


    Just messing with you. You put it out there. Thought it was funny and I would keep myself entertained at your expense.

    Oh! BTW I am by no means anywhere close to a Redneck so what the hell do I know.

  10. #10
    I think I can.
    Reputation: JOEMTBR COLORADO's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Posts
    1,241

    Look

    It's a 09 Dodge Charger

    Thanks for the share

    Quote Originally Posted by GIANTkiller View Post
    Alright - I cracked myself up with this one.
    It's going over pretty well on the dreaded FB as well.
    Modified here a little, but...

    If you drink boxed wine...from a throwback Broncos pint glass...from Arby's...while working on your bike...for entertainment...on a Friday night...
    YOU MIGHT BE A REDNECK!!!




    What'yall got???


    This thread could also be the latest "drinking/listening to" thread.

    Drinking boxed wine - listening to 99.5 the mountain.

    Dam,
    Bikes are FUN

  11. #11
    Bad Andy!
    Reputation: GIANTkiller's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    383
    Well for the record I am prolly 1/2 way between yuppie and redneck.
    So post your redneck-est pic, there Dose!

    Come on now - it'll be fun.

    So far I am claiming victory.

    HTRN is a close 2nd, cuz I have seen him, and he has the redneck in his name, ya know.

    Back to the Mongoose - later "ya'll".

  12. #12
    mtbr member
    Reputation: Dose's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Posts
    236
    Got no pics but here's my breakdown. I can't compete. I grew up the burbs! Here are the reasons I lose.....Though I come close on a few.

    1. I wear flannel shirts (because I grew up in New England)
    2. I own trucker hats (because I am a skateboarder)
    3. I do love Miller High Life
    4. I live in a Redneck Colorado town for sure and have great Redneck friends
    5. I own a Tacoma (ummmmm I mean Chevy)
    6. Sh#t, I even went to REI when I was in Denver last weekend.
    7. I eat canned corn straight out the can (This counts right?)
    8. Jim Beam is my shot of choice

    This thread made me laugh. Thanks

  13. #13
    Bad Andy!
    Reputation: GIANTkiller's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    383
    Think I done got the 'Goose fixed. Gonna have to test it to-marra, I reckon'.

    Nice #7, Dose.

  14. #14
    ..ouch
    Reputation: thump's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    2,024

    Amatuer!

    I'll see your redneck.. and raise you:

    The...You might be a redneck if...thread-web_20120612_151656.jpg

    and.. the mandatory F150... with lift kit.
    The...You might be a redneck if...thread-web_p1040283.jpg

    Right now I'm rebuilding a carburetor at my desk while drinking a PBR. What choo got son?

  15. #15
    Bad Andy!
    Reputation: GIANTkiller's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    383
    Yesss!
    That's what I'm talkin' bout!
    Now we're onto something.

    And I got.......SWEET F150.
    (not quite big enough, and a little too shiny, but hey - - - )



  16. #16
    ..ouch
    Reputation: thump's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    2,024
    Quote Originally Posted by GIANTkiller View Post
    Yesss!
    That's what I'm talkin' bout!
    Now we're onto something.

    And I got.......SWEET F150.
    (not quite big enough, and a little too shiny, but hey - - - )
    Thanks.. shiny only happens about twice a year, hence why it warranted a pic.

  17. #17
    I work in .001 tolerances
    Reputation: HomegrownMN's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    1,239
    Quote Originally Posted by JOEMTBR COLORADO View Post
    It's a 09 Dodge Charger

    Thanks for the share
    Ummm.. I'm gonna go with the yuppie Grand Cherokee.
    The new soccer mom's vehicle of choice.

    I'm still taken back by the bike in the pic though. I didn't know
    this guy rode bikes!

  18. #18
    mtbr member
    Reputation: Devildog1775's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    74
    First off Redneck's would never use a glass. Try a solo cup, red. Or better yet a 30 pack of Bush or Natty Light.

    I know about rednecks, just moved from North Georgia, not to far from where they filmed the movie Deliverance.

  19. #19
    friend of Apex
    Reputation: WKD-RDR's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    3,886
    them there air gone grips need a buffin
    the drugs made me realize it's not about the drugs

  20. #20
    mtbr member
    Reputation: Funrover's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    3,719
    Wait.... where is the Redneck of this thread? I am confused... I do see some nice toys however!

  21. #21
    banned
    Reputation: KarateChicken's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Posts
    1,865
    You own more than 3 shirts with cut off sleeves. - Jeff Foxworthy

    /end inane thread

  22. #22
    mtbr member
    Reputation: Colo Springs E's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Posts
    581
    A redneck who drinks... wine?? Don't think so!

  23. #23
    mtbr member
    Reputation:
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    405
    Wait...... MD 20/20 and Boones Farm are staples. Boxed wine? Who needs any sort of glass? Its like drinking milk straight from the jug.

  24. #24
    t.i.t.s.ceo/FR amoeba rep
    Reputation: PBR me!'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    4,764

    i got ya some redneck!

    pbr when hair was cool
    The...You might be a redneck if...thread-scan0001.jpg

    The...You might be a redneck if...thread-f-100.jpg

    that was a bad ass truck! rolled it a month after i bought it- hadnt even made my first payment

    this is the product after rebuild! cant find the pic after the light kit on roll bar!

    police interceptor 390 thing had balls!
    I'm a cowboy on a steel horse i ride!

    the blog

  25. #25
    mtbr member
    Reputation: Devildog1775's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Posts
    74
    ^^PBR, if that's a brown Carhartt jacket or jumpsuit your wearin, you might be a redneck.^^

  26. #26
    Bad Andy!
    Reputation: GIANTkiller's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    383
    Now that's what I'm talkin' bout, peburr.
    May have to throw the sweet monster van pic in here some of you have seen.

    I know there's more rednecks out here than have been showing stuff so far - cuz I've seen it.

    What else ya got?
    Don't be shy now.

    It's apparently real easy to beat mine!!

  27. #27
    Bad Andy!
    Reputation: GIANTkiller's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Posts
    383
    Quote Originally Posted by Devildog1775 View Post
    I know about rednecks, just moved from North Georgia, not to far from where they filmed the movie Deliverance.

    Baaaa-hahaha!
    Pics mandatory - but none of anyone squeelin' like a pig, por-fayvor.

  28. #28
    t.i.t.s.ceo/FR amoeba rep
    Reputation: PBR me!'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Posts
    4,764
    Quote Originally Posted by Devildog1775 View Post
    ^^PBR, if that's a brown Carhartt jacket or jumpsuit your wearin, you might be a redneck.^^
    That was my favorite carhartt! never should have thrown it away! - the moustache however had to go!
    I'm a cowboy on a steel horse i ride!

    the blog

  29. #29
    Heads up Flyboy!!
    Reputation: mountaingoatepics's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    3,159
    The Goat on the left at 18 years young...what a fugg up! Pack of Camel non-filters in hand, cheesy pimp stash and mini mullet. It got worse before it got better...

    <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/goatshell/4030661947/" title="86 Plymouth Lazer by Goat in a Turtle Shell, on Flickr"><img src="http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2633/4030661947_53cccdc810_z.jpg" width="640" height="477" alt="86 Plymouth Lazer"></a>

    The goat at 21 and looking fuggin worse for wear. At this time my wife (girlfriend at the time) and I lived in a 1960's ( the year was '98 for reference) 10' x 60' trailer on the coast of NC and I was rebuilding a 71' VW beetle motor on my front patio.

    <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/goatshell/7391670884/" title="WTF by Goat in a Turtle Shell, on Flickr"><img src="http://farm8.staticflickr.com/7071/7391670884_614ba897a0_z.jpg" width="640" height="480" alt="WTF"></a>

  30. #30
    spec4life???..smh...
    Reputation: spec4life's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Posts
    1,091
    hard to top the last one, but here ya go with my chevy 1500 in the background...
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails The...You might be a redneck if...thread-sany1151.jpg  


  31. #31
    killin clear creek
    Reputation: backcountryislife's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    759
    Sledding, wheeling, shooting guns... I wear carharts (despite the fact that I work in my home office & would be just as well served in my undies... ) and I live in what was once a mining shack in the mountains!







    And I drink MY wine from mason jars! (can't say anyone who drinks wine (even from a box!) on a regular basis qualifies for legit redneck status though... )
    Quote Originally Posted by thump View Post
    How about we take the "let it burn approach" with the rotting cesspool of the Denver metro?

  32. #32
    Your bike is incorrigible
    Reputation: Guyechka's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    3,130
    I live in Aurora. I have two trucks, one that is an 85 that I commute in and the other a 91 that is constantly being worked on. There are car parts all over the house; for example, a front passenger seat in the living room. I wear a Carhart jacket, hat, pants. I chew. Own a rottie and cattle dog. Sometimes I ride my bike, but not often.

  33. #33
    ..ouch
    Reputation: thump's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    2,024
    Quote Originally Posted by backcountryislife View Post
    Sledding, wheeling, shooting guns... I wear carharts (despite the fact that I work in my home office & would be just as well served in my undies... ) and I live in what was once a mining shack in the mountains!
    I was wondering when you'd jump in. You've got a key ingredient there with the gun angle.

    Unfortunately I think the fact that we actually use the interwebs disqualifies most all of us from true hardcore redneck status. Although mountaingoatpics appears he might have just made the cut.

    Quote Originally Posted by Guyechka View Post
    I live in Aurora. I have two trucks, one that is an 85 that I commute in and the other a 91 that is constantly being worked on. There are car parts all over the house; for example, a front passenger seat in the living room. I wear a Carhart jacket, hat, pants. I chew. Own a rottie and cattle dog. Sometimes I ride my bike, but not often.
    Pics needed.

  34. #34
    Team Velveeta™
    Reputation: TomP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    2,948

    Losing my redneck like I'm losing my hair.

    Quote Originally Posted by Guyechka View Post
    I live in Aurora. I have two trucks, one that is an 85 that I commute in and the other a 91 that is constantly being worked on. There are car parts all over the house; for example, a front passenger seat in the living room. I wear a Carhart jacket, hat, pants. I chew. Own a rottie and cattle dog. Sometimes I ride my bike, but not often.
    I've still got some redneck remnants, but I peaked in the 80s.

    Back then I lived in WY, I did a stint as a heavy equipment operator and had dickie coveralls that had permanent diesel fuel stains (I wore them skiing at Vail once in like '84, had lots of admirers [NOT!]). I drove a '75 Chevy Monza with a small block and a crane cam with the catalytic converter cut out of it that got used like a truck. I fished. A lot. With bait. I drank shaefers and rhinelander. My music was ZZ Top, The Notting Hillbillies, Chet Atkins, JJ Cale.

    I moved to Colorado in 1986 and slowly the redneck got washed away. Stopped fishing with bait entirely and only cast flies. In 1990 I bought a white Honda Civic. Got edumacated. Got a job where you had to wear a tie. I was married to a Wyo girl, but on one trip in the 90s up in N. Wyo to visit her folks I realized I suddenly felt like a foreigner up there. The cowboys up there sneered at my little white car and green plates. And they started trying to send me to fish in irrigation ditches.

    I wound up with Toyota pickup trucks for almost 20 years, but they are ferrin trucks.

    Now I've got remnants. I keep a 357 handy (having a bad-ass handgun in the house is the law up here--I also have four long guns including a 20 guage pump that got the hack-saw treatment). I really don't have any pants that I actually wear that aren't carhartts.

    But I also have lycra in the house. I haven't fished in years. And I listen to lots of Radiohead, Deadmou5, and Beck. And I don't even have a pickup truck any more. Just a little wimpy 4 cyclinder car, box stock. I only drink fancy-pants beer, and sometimes I even drink Chardonnay (?!?). About 80% the food I buy is organic.

    And I have cats. Oh God, there, I admitted it. I own cats.

    Tom Purvis - Salida, CO - http://teamvelveeta.tom-purvis.com

    "I like my wimmen like I like my beer--cold and bitter!"

  35. #35
    killin clear creek
    Reputation: backcountryislife's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    759
    Quote Originally Posted by thump View Post
    I was wondering when you'd jump in. You've got a key ingredient there with the gun angle.

    Unfortunately I think the fact that we actually use the interwebs disqualifies most all of us from true hardcore redneck status.
    I don't know man... some of the sled forums I'm on, it amazes me the guys who grab a keyboard & start posting... and they're FULL ON redneck, no doubt about it.

    Not really super "into" guns... but that kitty that was hanging out on my roof finally stopped visiting when I put a round into the ground near him (can't afford the jail time from killing him) when he was screaming at me... mission accomplished, yay AK47!
    Quote Originally Posted by thump View Post
    How about we take the "let it burn approach" with the rotting cesspool of the Denver metro?

  36. #36
    mtbr member
    Reputation:
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    4
    Rednecks dont ride bikes for fun. They ride them because they got a DUI and lost their drivers license.

  37. #37
    mtbr member
    Reputation:
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    4
    Rednecks dont ride bikes for fun. They ride them because they got a DUI and lost their drivers license!

  38. #38
    ..ouch
    Reputation: thump's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    2,024
    Quote Originally Posted by backcountryislife View Post
    ..when I put a round into the ground near him
    You just DQ'd yourself there.. a real redneck woulda been cookin up kitty-kabobs that night.

  39. #39
    killin clear creek
    Reputation: backcountryislife's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Posts
    759
    Quote Originally Posted by thump View Post
    You just DQ'd yourself there.. a real redneck woulda been cookin up kitty-kabobs that night.
    Yeah... and a real redneck wouldn't take the time I do to pick up every shell I shoot, and any others I see as well... working my way right out of this competition... DAMIT.
    (though, kitty kabobs sound mighty yummy... it's been 4 weeks, stoked he's finally gone)
    Quote Originally Posted by thump View Post
    How about we take the "let it burn approach" with the rotting cesspool of the Denver metro?

  40. #40
    Your bike is incorrigible
    Reputation: Guyechka's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    3,130
    Quote Originally Posted by TomP View Post

    And I have cats. Oh God, there, I admitted it. I own cats.

    I'll bet the calico is the best cat of the three.

  41. #41
    Team Velveeta™
    Reputation: TomP's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    2,948

    Pirate

    Quote Originally Posted by Guyechka View Post
    I'll bet the calico is the best cat of the three.
    In order to achieve three goals, 1) to kill some time while I wait for a code test to complete, 2) utterly and completely kill off any idea that I have any redneck left, and 3) bore most everyone silly; I tell the story of the calico.

    April of 2011 I adopt two male neutered cats from the Canon City Shelter. September of 2011 I notice one of them has a swelling as if he (she) had swallowed a grapefruit. Then I perform the more focused exam than either the shelter's vet or I had in the past and find that he was not a male, or neutered, and that she was in the family way. October of 2011 five kittens were born on my lap, permanently staining an old pair cotton sweats.

    There were two tri-color calicos, a tuxedo male, a lavender point siamese, and a grey tiger who looked exactly like his mother.

    December of 2011 I find homes for one of the calicos, the tux, and the siamese. As January started I went about aggressively looking for a home for the two remaining ones, but by the end of the month realized I couldn't give up Pirate, the calico. Finally found a home for Tigg in early February.

    Pirate is now an 8 month old holy terror, climbing curtains and attacking my shoelaces when I'm trying to get ready for work. She was claws and teeth on the back of my neck at 5 AM. But mostly she's pretty good.



    Ah, code test complete. Back to work.
    Tom Purvis - Salida, CO - http://teamvelveeta.tom-purvis.com

    "I like my wimmen like I like my beer--cold and bitter!"

  42. #42
    Your bike is incorrigible
    Reputation: Guyechka's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    3,130
    Quote Originally Posted by TomP View Post
    In order to achieve three goals, 1) to kill some time while I wait for a code test to complete, 2) utterly and completely kill off any idea that I have any redneck left, and 3) bore most everyone silly; I tell the story of the calico.

    April of 2011 I adopt two male neutered cats from the Canon City Shelter. September of 2011 I notice one of them has a swelling as if he (she) had swallowed a grapefruit. Then I perform the more focused exam than either the shelter's vet or I had in the past and find that he was not a male, or neutered, and that she was in the family way. October of 2011 five kittens were born on my lap, permanently staining an old pair cotton sweats.

    There were two tri-color calicos, a tuxedo male, a lavender point siamese, and a grey tiger who looked exactly like his mother.

    December of 2011 I find homes for one of the calicos, the tux, and the siamese. As January started I went about aggressively looking for a home for the two remaining ones, but by the end of the month realized I couldn't give up Pirate, the calico. Finally found a home for Tigg in early February.

    Pirate is now an 8 month old holy terror, climbing curtains and attacking my shoelaces when I'm trying to get ready for work. She was claws and teeth on the back of my neck at 5 AM. But mostly she's pretty good.


    Well, that's to be expected from a kitten. All I know is that every calico I've come across has been more personable than any other kind of cat. I had a calico who would do a sweep of the living room every hour or so while I was watching TV, just to check in on me. She was more like a dog in her behavior, which is probably why I liked her.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •