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  1. #1
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    Of a new beer and a beater car

    I've never had a Deschutes anything so, since the sixers were on sale at $6.99 at Superior Liquors a few days ago I took a chance. Wow, the Inversion IPA is great stuff. 6.8%, which used to be "low" for me but is now "high" alcohol content. Oh well, once in awhile might just do me good.

    There has been a dead Chevy parked almost outside the 'hood, over by the Open Space, for months now. Sitting rusting by itself for the longest time. It looked like it'd been towed there and abandoned. I never saw anyone tending to it. Finally somebody decided to break out the drivers' side windows, which almost didn't alter its appearance. Glass all over the road. And there it sat.

    Two days ago I happened to be over there and...the owner had started it up and was "cruising" down the avenue. It sounded worse than it looks but it ran. I gave the guy a thumbs up as he motored clanking and sputtering by. He shot me his best Mona Lisa. I figured that was it, guy was leaving town heading for the great unknown, just him and his beater.

    No, he managed to drive it around back into the hood, park it again and there it sits, for everyone to appreciate. I'm loading these pics mtbr-style so I have no idea how they're going to post.

    To call it a classic is a stretch. The windshield is held together with silicone. If rust was worth something this car would be worth a fortune. The rear interior deck looks like a war zone.

    Of a new beer and a beater car-1-dsc_0533.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-2-dsc_0535.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-3-dsc_0536.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-4-dsc_0539.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-5-dsc_0540.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-6-dsc_0542.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-7-dsc_0543.jpg
    A blind man searches in a dark room for a black hat that isn't there. Dashiell Hammett

  2. #2
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    Could be a sweet car in the right hands!

  3. #3
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    I kept wondering if the guy had bought it to restore, in which case he could have bought something that wasn't so far gone. And he obviously doesn't have garage space to work on it. As it is, a lifetime project but judging from the guy's gray beard as he "motored" past I don't think that's long enough! You should have heard the clanking. I couldn't tell if it was all coming from the motor or parts behind, or both. It sounded like it was running on maybe 3 cylinders...out of six, out of eight, doesn't matter!
    A blind man searches in a dark room for a black hat that isn't there. Dashiell Hammett

  4. #4
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    It needs a rack and a Yeti on top. Then sit on the hood enjoying a Jubelale.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by cookiedough View Post
    It needs a rack and a Yeti on top. Then sit on the hood enjoying a Jubelale.
    That was one of my favorite features of my old '69 Dart. The concave rear window was crazy comfortable for reclining.

  6. #6
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    '67 or '68 Impala 4-door hardtop. A hardtop had no window frames, so if you rolled front and rear down it was wide open, as opposed to the sedan version which had a full frame on the windows. They didn't make 4-door hardtops much past the early 70's.

    The variety of engines you could get in those cars was amazing. Everything from a straight six to a firebreathing 427. I had a '69 Impala 4-door sedan with a 327 and a '70 Biscayne 4-door sedan (a low rent Impala sold mostly to fleets) that had a 250 straight six with a TWO-SPEED Powerglide transmission. That's right, a two speed automatic. Top speed on that car was about 70 mph. 0-60 took about THIRTY seconds. I'm not kidding.

    Another one bites the dust. That car is not worth restoring unless it originally had one of the super hot engines.

  7. #7
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    Try the deschutes chasing freshies wet hopped IPA. It's great, only sold in bombers and about $6-7. They make some really good beers.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by honkinunit View Post
    '67 or '68 Impala 4-door hardtop. A hardtop had no window frames, so if you rolled front and rear down it was wide open, as opposed to the sedan version which had a full frame on the windows. They didn't make 4-door hardtops much past the early 70's.

    The variety of engines you could get in those cars was amazing. Everything from a straight six to a firebreathing 427. I had a '69 Impala 4-door sedan with a 327 and a '70 Biscayne 4-door sedan (a low rent Impala sold mostly to fleets) that had a 250 straight six with a TWO-SPEED Powerglide transmission. That's right, a two speed automatic. Top speed on that car was about 70 mph. 0-60 took about THIRTY seconds. I'm not kidding.

    Another one bites the dust. That car is not worth restoring unless it originally had one of the super hot engines.
    I had a series of Chevy station wagons back in my youth. One was a '67 Impala wagon with a 327. The air cleaner had "275 Horsepower" on it. It finally started blowing so much blue I abandoned it in disgust. I had no money to rebuild it. Turns out that that motor was very sought after for restorers to rebuild. I found that out when I mentioned that motor to a guy at an auto parts store later. He just put his head in his hands and says "man, you should have let me know, I'd have bought that from you!!" for a number that made my young head spin.

    I just looked at this beater again and, indeed, it does have a 327. Maybe it is worth restoring. Maybe.
    A blind man searches in a dark room for a black hat that isn't there. Dashiell Hammett

  9. #9
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    That is patina, not rust. If you look up the definition of "beater", there is a picture of that car!
    2013 Trek Marlin 29er stock (blue)
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  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by pearl-drum-man View Post
    That is patina, not rust. If you look up the definition of "beater", there is a picture of that car!
    Patina! LOL. Next time I see the owner I'll say "hey man nice patina".
    A blind man searches in a dark room for a black hat that isn't there. Dashiell Hammett

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by xcguy View Post
    Patina! LOL. Next time I see the owner I'll say "hey man nice patina".
    Since it's Blues Friday here at work, that kinda runs along the lines of Earl Hooker's "Is you ever seen a one eyed woman cry"

  12. #12
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    Looks like a great car to hide out it! Throw a rack on it and enjoy!

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Funrover View Post
    Looks like a great car to hide out it! Throw a rack on it and enjoy!
    I'm telling you, it has Funrover written all over it. Shoot the guy an offer, motor on down to some trailhead on three cylinders, then bask in the admiration of onlookers as you unload one of your vintage rides...then hang out for awhile. With pics!
    A blind man searches in a dark room for a black hat that isn't there. Dashiell Hammett

  14. #14
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    A little Helmet concert for ya Friday evening:

    A blind man searches in a dark room for a black hat that isn't there. Dashiell Hammett

  15. #15
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    I finally met the owner. Turns out it was his dad's car, he bought it new (I think) and it eventually just started falling apart and the current owner (the son) inherited it. The bent sheet metal on the drivers' side was the result of, through the years, the dad kept turning too sharply to get into his garage. At 60, just a ding. At 70, some real damage, at 80, as you see. No, it doesn't have a 327 in it, the son dropped a 350 in it and, unbelievably, is still trying to work on it and make it "better". I said "quite a project man" and he again shot me his best Mona Lisa. Memories of his old man have a lot to do with it I bet.

    No, he doesn't have garage space for it (the wifey had something to say about that) so I'll get to take pics all winter of it rusting under a cover of snow.

    Here it is, in all its current decrepit glory:

    Of a new beer and a beater car-1-p1040014.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-2-p1040017.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-3-p1040019.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-4-p1040021.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-5-p1040022.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-6-p1040024.jpgOf a new beer and a beater car-7-p1040027.jpg
    A blind man searches in a dark room for a black hat that isn't there. Dashiell Hammett

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by xcguy View Post
    I finally met the owner. Turns out it was his dad's car, he bought it new (I think) and it eventually just started falling apart and the current owner (the son) inherited it. The bent sheet metal on the drivers' side was the result of, through the years, the dad kept turning too sharply to get into his garage. At 60, just a ding. At 70, some real damage, at 80, as you see. No, it doesn't have a 327 in it, the son dropped a 350 in it and, unbelievably, is still trying to work on it and make it "better". I said "quite a project man" and he again shot me his best Mona Lisa. Memories of his old man have a lot to do with it I bet.

    No, he doesn't have garage space for it (the wifey had something to say about that) so I'll get to take pics all winter of it rusting under a cover of snow.

    Here it is, in all its current decrepit glory:

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    this is kind of the story that keeps on giving, good smile on a Sunday evening

  17. #17
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    More power to him, I guess. Emotions are what turn a beater into a money pit. At some point you have to cut the cord unless money means nothing to you.

    I knew a woman who had a Triumph Spitfire back in the early 80's who just continually dumped money into the car. You could have picked up a Spitfire in mint condition for $3000 at the time, and I lost count at around $8000 she had in hers. I told her she should cut her losses and buy another one since she liked them so much, and you would have thought I told her to kill her mother or something. That car was HERS. She didn't like Triumph Spitfires, she liked THAT CAR.

    On the other hand, I owned a couple of old muscle cars, that had I hung onto them like that, they would have payed off big in the end. I also passed on a ton of them that later became ridiculously valuable. I remember riding a century in Florida in 1982 or 83, and along the route near Orlando I took a break in the shade of a tree in a yard where there was 1970 Superbird with a 440 and a 1969 Daytona Charger with a 440 six-pack. The Superbird was $7000 and the Daytona was $8000. Both had automatics, and I don't like autos.

    Those things go for $100,000+ now.

  18. #18
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    Great story, I hope he can get it done!

  19. #19
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    I read a story in Road and Track about a 1952 Aston Martin. There was a picture of the dad, around 42 years old, standing next to it. In the story the son said he was around 18 at the time, had gone away to Switzerland to go to school a few years after the pic was taken, the dad had "upgraded" to a 1955 Aston Martin something or other and offered the '52 to the son for $1000.

    As the son said, $1000 was a lot of money back in those days and he passed. Years later he happened to be in some auto repair place near his hometown and, to make a long story short, his dad's original AM was there. It took some forensic science to figure that out (new paint, different stuff inside) but it was his dad's. He said he paid an ungodly amount for it but he had to have it.

    Later he told his dad he bought that car. First thing his dad said was "why in hell did you do that??"
    A blind man searches in a dark room for a black hat that isn't there. Dashiell Hammett

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by honkinunit View Post
    More power to him, I guess. Emotions are what turn a beater into a money pit. At some point you have to cut the cord unless money means nothing to you.

    ... there was 1970 Superbird with a 440 and a 1969 Daytona Charger with a 440 six-pack. The Superbird was $7000 and the Daytona was $8000. Both had automatics, and I don't like autos.

    Those things go for $100,000+ now.
    Yeah, he could put 10-15K in that thing just so he could have a nice vintage chevy worth around $6500. If it's really that sentimental, and he has the stack, go for it. Those old chevys did run for a long time, they were built to last in a different way than modern cars, even the decent ones. But that was largely because they'll still run even with a carb that desperately needs a rebuild, plugs with 50K miles on them, no compression or uneven compression, etc. They have no tempermental computers or complex vacuum systems for keeping the catalytic converter (which they obviously don't have) happy.

    But they also handle like a shopping cart. They get incredibly shitarific gas mileage. Seat belts were an option back then...

    I still remember drooling over the 60's and 70's American steel when I was a kid. You could have taken that Chevy from the pics and put a set of keystone classics and white letter tires on it and it would have been pretty cool. Back then. My little hometown was lousy with cars like that--overpowered American sedans from before the first oil crisis with fancy wheels and tires.

    The old mopars with the 440 and 426 hemis were amazing. They handled worse than any of the other muscle cars (ford variants, GM variants, and even cars like the AMC Javelin) but the power was amazing. The superbird was actually sold as a production car only because in order to have a car/drivetrain racing in the stock car circuit you had to have sold at least 500 of them to the general public.

    My dad had a huge '72 Chrysler Town and Country station wagon. It was a nine-passenger vehicle, huge long parade boat. The hood alone was probably 8 feet long. It had a 440 (not hemi) with stock 4-barrel Holley. The carb itself was probably a foot or more wide. You could melt the tires from a dead stop. Pulling our boat, you could stomp on it to pass somebody and go from 45mph to 75 in a matter of seconds. I buried the speedo (somewhere over 120) one time, which was crazy because it floated all over the place. I did it on a narrow country road. Still alive though! That same night, I got negative fuel mileage. Gallons per mile, not miles per gallon... the sound that motor made when you fed it a metric ****-ton of gasoline all at once was amazing.
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  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by xcguy View Post
    .. and there it sits, for everyone to appreciate.
    You should thank him. Most character that 'burb will have all year.

  22. #22
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    Of a new beer and a beater car-omega-sold.jpgIf it's originally a CO car, likely the body isn't that bad, at least compared to a car from the rust belt (like MI, where I'm from). My dad has started with way worse. Motor/ tranny/ interior work is so much easier than replacing floorpans and seaming in lower fender halves.

    His '73 Omega started out that shade of green, with a dark green vinyl top. Although he'd be the last to want to know how much time/ money he put into it vs. what he sold it for...
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  23. #23
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    Still a four door with non-matching numbers though. It's definitely a sentimental restoration and not smart money.

  24. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Liquidmantis View Post
    Still a four door with non-matching numbers though. It's definitely a sentimental restoration and not smart money.
    Ha ha, a smart restoration. That's a good one.
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  25. #25
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    Yeah, well a 2-door with matching numbers would have some resale value at least.

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