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  1. #1
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    You know your a Clyde when.....

    State things "you know your a redneck when.." style..

    You know your a clyde when, some one ask are Giant bikes made for big guys..

    Yeah my sister asked me that.. i cracked up.. postem...

  2. #2
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    You sway instead of sprint to get your swerve on.
    roccowt.
    rocnbikemeld

  3. #3
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    When your saddle height for climbing is taller then your riding buddy!

  4. #4
    turtles make me hot
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    When my shoulders are bouncing off the trees on tight singletrack as all my smaller buddies slip right on through.
    I like turtles

  5. #5
    Fat boy Mod Moderator
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    the shoulders bouncing off trees sucks ... rips up shirts also also fun to go under low laying trees... stop pedaling, fold your body down and even then I typicaly knock my camelback on it...
    - Surly Disc trucker
    - '82 trek 560 roadie

  6. #6
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    Your seatpost is kinked backwards at a 45 degree angle.

    You don't care how much your derailleur weighs.

    When you ride through a creek you get all your riding buddies nearby wet.

  7. #7
    Optimum Value
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    when your all-mountain bike is your XC ride...

  8. #8
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    You can twist your derailluer hanger around your QR like a wet noodle, going uphill.
    A lightweight wheelset is 2500 grams.
    They don't make cycling shoes big enough to fit you.
    Your commuter has 32mm wide rims.
    You get 40% sag at max psi.
    Your light bike is 34lbs.
    You don't need a big chainring to go 60mph down a slight incline.
    You hit your shoulder on a tree on tight singletrack, and break the tree.
    You're afraid to sit on a roadbike because you will buckle the wheels.
    Carbon Fiber cringes at the mere sight of you.
    400mm is a short seatpost.
    8mm seat rails are too flexy.
    A 21" framed bike feels like a BMX.

    = )

  9. #9
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    when loggers ask if you can pull this chain for a while.

    when moose move out of your way.

    when your friends don't hear you fall so much as feel the tremors when you hit the ground.
    Visit Ted's Broken Bike and Refurbished Unicycle Emporium

  10. #10
    Smarter Than He Looks
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    If you get pinch flats running tubeless at 35psi......


    You might be a Clyde.

  11. #11
    turtles make me hot
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    Quote Originally Posted by savagemann
    You can twist your derailluer hanger around your QR like a wet noodle, going uphill.
    A lightweight wheelset is 2500 grams.
    They don't make cycling shoes big enough to fit you.
    Your commuter has 32mm wide rims.
    You get 40% sag at max psi.
    Your light bike is 34lbs.
    You don't need a big chainring to go 60mph down a slight incline.
    You hit your shoulder on a tree on tight singletrack, and break the tree.
    You're afraid to sit on a roadbike because you will buckle the wheels.
    Carbon Fiber cringes at the mere sight of you.
    400mm is a short seatpost.
    8mm seat rails are too flexy.
    A 21" framed bike feels like a BMX.

    = )
    Haha!! I fell into a tree and broke it. Whenever we pass that spot, my friend always says there's your tree!!
    I like turtles

  12. #12
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    ........you think you're hearing the foliage brushing your spokes, only to find your rim eyelets are empty.

  13. #13
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    You know you're a clyde when...

    You consider trying to mount the front brakes from your truck onto your bike, just to slow down.
    next time

    [QUOTE=spazzy] Might as well sell your bikes, E-riding is much more productive.

  14. #14
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    When you know that Clydesdales are awesome. And Magnificent.
    roccowt.
    rocnbikemeld

  15. #15
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    People keep saying " you should get a bigger bike or a try 29'er" But I'm ridin an XL Niner???

    Or my fav, after unloading and gearing up at the trailhead, guy rides by laughing and comes back to my truck, "Crap man, that's an F-150, I though it was an old Ford Ranger."
    Great, I'm so big I make a pickup truck look small!

  16. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by 29WI
    People keep saying " you should get a bigger bike or a try 29'er" But I'm ridin an XL Niner???

    Or my fav, after unloading and gearing up at the trailhead, guy rides by laughing and comes back to my truck, "Crap man, that's an F-150, I though it was an old Ford Ranger."
    Great, I'm so big I make a pickup truck look small!
    Magnificent.
    roccowt.
    rocnbikemeld

  17. #17
    Captain Underpants
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    your XC fork is a 36VAN . . . .

    Quote Originally Posted by WTF-IDK
    You consider trying to mount the front brakes from your truck onto your bike, just to slow down.
    Downhill brakes actually work pretty well.

  18. #18
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    You know you're a clyde when...

    your lbs only knows you as the big guy that brakes frames.

    my personal list for a Trek fuel 70:
    3 rear tryangles.
    main frame once.
    2 front forks.
    2 sram casetts.
    tacoed 2 front wheels.
    1 rear wheel.
    1 brake caliper.
    all broken parts were done 1 at a time. i.e.no combos like front wheel and fork at the same time.

    This is why my new Heckler is way over built.
    I will post pics as soon as i figure out how.
    next time

    [QUOTE=spazzy] Might as well sell your bikes, E-riding is much more productive.

  19. #19
    turtles make me hot
    Reputation: NYrr496's Avatar
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    My last bike was a Cannondale from the 90's with a 1" steerer with a Manitou EFC on it. I brought it to a LBS for a new bottom bracket and some other customer walked up and asked "Is that your bike?" I replied Yep... He said "Are you crazy? It's gonna break."

    A month later, I purchased my FSR 29er and I've never been happier.
    I like turtles

  20. #20
    Pedaler of dirt
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    You know you're a clyde when...

    You have to check the max weight limit on new parts, frames or bikes.
    You never want to borrow a friends bike.
    You find the chest strap on a camelbak to be too small.
    You can use momentum to get through stuff cycling whippets need to pedal through.
    You are always catching up and passing friends on downhills.
    Your local trail has a number of trees snapped off at your shoulder height.
    You ride 203mm disks for XC and need it.
    Hikers never get cross with you.
    You know that mtb limbo isn't for you...

    It's not enough that we do our best; sometimes we have to do what's required.

  21. #21
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    ...when the skinny little weasels that pass you on the way up, fear for their lives as you thunder past them on the way down.

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by markymark
    ...when the skinny little weasels that pass you on the way up, fear for their lives as you thunder past them on the way down.
    Yup Yup.
    roccowt.
    rocnbikemeld

  23. #23
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    when you constantly check to see if your wheels go out of true when you hit a bump.


    when you check your frame for cracks after a ride.


    I do both of these things...

  24. #24
    Fat boy Mod Moderator
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    when you consider 700x40 tires "road tires"
    - Surly Disc trucker
    - '82 trek 560 roadie

  25. #25
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    Hahaha. My road bike has 26" wheels and 1.75" tires. the rims are 32mm wide.....Bike weighs 33lbs.......= )
    I did almost hit 30mph the other day on flat ground with a 36t up front. Yes, even my commuter has a bash guard...LOL

    I know I'm a clyde because I have to ask a co-worker to test ride bikes I work on, in fear of breaking the customers bike....LOL

  26. #26
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    This thread has described my bike perfectly. I ride a six inch all mountain dually with 8" rotors, Marzocchi 66, 2.5 inch tires and use it for XC.

  27. #27
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    ...when your suspension creaks as you mount your ride

  28. #28
    I Have Cookies
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    Quote Originally Posted by savagemann
    Hahaha. My road bike has 26" wheels and 1.75" tires. the rims are 32mm wide.....Bike weighs 33lbs.......= )
    I did almost hit 30mph the other day on flat ground with a 36t up front. Yes, even my commuter has a bash guard...LOL

    I know I'm a clyde because I have to ask a co-worker to test ride bikes I work on, in fear of breaking the customers bike....LOL
    This is sooo me! I just got my new "trail" wheels back from my lbs Sun big mammoth fats! BABY!!! Cant wait for this rain to stop so I can try em out (Huck off somthing)
    The most important thing is what God thinks about it. He will have the final say.” – Joshua Stinebrink

    ____
    Kimo

  29. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by ae111black
    This is sooo me! I just got my new "trail" wheels back from my lbs Sun big mammoth fats! BABY!!! Cant wait for this rain to stop so I can try em out (Huck off somthing)
    X2 on the Sun Mammoth rims. I got a set of IRC Kujo tires to mount on my full suspension build. That's gonna be my bash'em smash'em tank bike.
    roccowt.
    rocnbikemeld

  30. #30
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    You know you're a clyde when your riding pack (hydro pack) weighs more than most DH'ers bikes.
    You wish power bars were 4 times bigger,
    You use DH tubes with slime for xc rides,
    XXL riding shorts explode when you exhale,
    16oz beer cans disappear in your hand when you hold em,
    Sidi doesn't make a riding shoe wide enough,
    You broke a fox 40 on the way to the store,
    Semi trucks draft you.

  31. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by NYrr496
    Haha!! I fell into a tree and broke it. Whenever we pass that spot, my friend always says there's your tree!!
    Hahaha, thats so rad.
    I broke my door jam once, heading out my bedroom and turning towards the b-room. It didn't even hurt.....= )

  32. #32
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    you went for years thinking everyone got 4 months out of a chain
    you base your fork selection on who has the highest possible spring rate
    you're the mule on bikepacking trips
    your friends do the 'clipless tip over' when they try out your bike
    you base seat post selection on whats the longest (460mm nitto, woo!)
    8" rotors on the townie
    I like cheap stuff that works great and is very sturdy.

  33. #33
    turtles make me hot
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    Haha!! When I got my XL 29er, my buddy took it for a spin. He looked like a kid taking his dad's bike for a ride.
    I like turtles

  34. #34
    Pedaler of dirt
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paul1977
    I ride a six inch all mountain dually with 8" rotors, Marzocchi 66, 2.5 inch tires and use it for XC.
    Yeah, that's me too.

    You get some funny looks at the start line or the trail head, but it's all relative when it comes to bike/rider weight ratio. I'm running about 14% (235lb rider on 33lb bike) compared to a XC whippet also about 14% (150lb rider on 21lb bike).
    It's not enough that we do our best; sometimes we have to do what's required.

  35. #35
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    Your friend always send you over the bridges first.
    Visit Ted's Broken Bike and Refurbished Unicycle Emporium

  36. #36
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    For The Tall Clydes

    Your 29er gives you flash backs of Rad (BMX Movie)
    You get 3 or less frame selections
    You get to choose from one shoe for clipless
    Everything you try to get costs twice as much
    Your inseam is taller then a horse jockey (sorry if you are a horse jockey )
    You don't have to reach above your shoulders to get your bike off your car rack
    People ask you how the weather is so you spit on them an say its raining
    Live Large

  37. #37
    SALLGUD
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    You know you're a tall Clyde when you follow your buddies on a summer trail ride and get spider webs (and the eight legged creatures) on your face and neck. No where else...

    Or they ask if you have already ridden a certain trail that day. If you have, that's where they head. They know they won't have any spider encounters...

  38. #38
    Slave to the grind
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    Quote Originally Posted by savagemann
    Carbon Fiber cringes at the mere sight of you.


    = )
    +1 friends dont let friends ride carbon. i have a mortal fear of a that stuff snapping on me.

    and my xc bike is a heckler hehehehe.
    Let it flow, let yourself go, slow and low, that is the tempo.

  39. #39
    Fat boy Mod Moderator
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    Quote Originally Posted by azdrawdy
    You know you're a tall Clyde when you follow your buddies on a summer trail ride and get spider webs (and the eight legged creatures) on your face and neck. No where else...

    Or they ask if you have already ridden a certain trail that day. If you have, that's where they head. They know they won't have any spider encounters...

    haha we've got a a few trails around here... one of em doesn't get much traffic... last summer it was so bad i ended up riding it at about 5mph the entire way... holding a stick to catch the webs... i HATE riding full on into a web... with a spider sitting right in your face...

    riding spider patrol sucks
    - Surly Disc trucker
    - '82 trek 560 roadie

  40. #40
    In the rear with the beer
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    ...what you had for breakfast weighed more than the guy (camelbak and all) who won Cat 2 XC.....
    ....when what you did after breakfast in the port-o-john weighed more than the guy who won Cat 1.....
    ....when no one ever corrects your trail manners, they just give you the trail regardless.....
    Salvation Outdoor
    "Take it Outside...Again!!!"

  41. #41
    Fat boy Mod Moderator
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    when going DH you ride your stoppers all the way down to not run into the guy in front of you... and as soon as the trail turns up hill they walk away from you... like you're still riding the stoppers...
    - Surly Disc trucker
    - '82 trek 560 roadie

  42. #42
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    speaking of stoppers

    when you try other people's rides and you always complain that their brakes are kinda weak- funny how they never seem notice that.

    oh yeah when you try other people's rides and they look kinda stressed when you bottom out the suspension just by sitting on the bike. heheheh
    Let it flow, let yourself go, slow and low, that is the tempo.

  43. #43
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    When you think aluminum is another word for plastic
    When 3XL shorts are too tight
    When you have to special order your cycling jerseys
    When the cheapest fork that will support you is made for DH and is over $400
    When bike manufacturers know you by name because of all your snapped frames
    When a 6 inch drop worries you because you might bottom out your fork
    It's easy to make a buck, it's much harder to make a difference."

  44. #44
    Fat boy Mod Moderator
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    sounds like mr nickels is riding a spring fork ... haha

    for sizing of shorts... you have to pay attention if they are doing US or euro 3x sizing... HUGE difference...
    - Surly Disc trucker
    - '82 trek 560 roadie

  45. #45
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    Yeah I have a stupid gila on my trek 4300 for bike path riding and I've bottomed that thing out more times than I can count. I will ride it till it breaks and then replace it with a rigid fork.

    My cobia has a decent fork with a tora, but it's dialed in at max air pressure. I suspect it to fail anytime I do any drops. I will replace it with a Reba or Fox fork whenever it does decide to quit on me.

    I still wouldn't trade being a clyde for anything. It's great to see the looks on little guys faces when you ride past them on the trails and your 29er makes their bike look like a bmx bike from wally world.
    It's easy to make a buck, it's much harder to make a difference."

  46. #46
    Fat boy Mod Moderator
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    what do you consider the "max" pressure on the tora?... i've got the identical fork (came off a '08 cobia)... i've run it as high as 300psi @ 80mm and never a problem... running lower now that i'm @ 100mm... it's a great fork IMHO... just heavy.

    I could use a little more pressure in there as this post ride pics shows (note the zip tie location)... but other then that



    anyway... was just looking for a jersey... a 3xl euro size is about the same as a "big" us med. or a small US large... I know they kinda do the same deal with shorts... gota go baised on the size chart for the specific brand
    - Surly Disc trucker
    - '82 trek 560 roadie

  47. #47
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    when instead of swerving to avoid trees you just break them off with your shoulders....
    when you two people riding abreast drafting behind you....
    when you ride a 29er and it looks like a bmx bike.....
    when you can't find any riding clothes in a well stocked bike store....
    when you look more forward to the spaghetti feed before and the beer after a race...

  48. #48
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    When you go to the LBS to pick up a couple of things, and the salesman assumes it's a gift for someone else.
    Happened this morning...

  49. #49
    Fat boy Mod Moderator
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    you need to find a LBS who goes out on the group rides ... my guy brakes more suff then any of us lardy riders and he's not a big dood haha...
    - Surly Disc trucker
    - '82 trek 560 roadie

  50. #50
    Slave to the grind
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    when although you know Lance really rocks, your idol is someone more like stormcrowe-

    http://theamazingshrinkingman.blogspot.com/

    hey man you still active on this site?
    Let it flow, let yourself go, slow and low, that is the tempo.

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