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Attempted Bike Theft Spoiled

1K views 10 replies 8 participants last post by  cstem 
#1 · (Edited)
I know, long post... but it'll be worth it.

Facing the front window in a restaurant while eating lunch with my buddy this afternoon in Tempe, I see a student, looked like a body builder, ride up on an expensive road bike and lean it against the building outside the window. He pulled off his clip less shoes and helmet, came into the restaurant, and sat down in the booth behind me with, who I would later learn, his dad.

About 30 minutes later, my buddies talking to me and I’m staring out the window in typical ADD distraction when I see some guy run by, grab the body builder’s expensive bike and bolt. I yelled, "you're bike!" The body builder streaks past me and out the door. I’m right on his heels. The bike thief is halfway down the parking lot now and gaining speed. The body builder yells something as he races after in hot pursuit.

I jump in my pickup truck, fire it up, and peel after them, both around the corner now and out of sight. About a block away I catch up to the body builder sprinting like a madman, the bike thief is still in sight but now way down the street. "Get in," I yell. The body builder jumps onto the running boards of my truck, his massive arm cranked through the window holding a handgrip on the door. He looked like a gangster, sans the machine gun, as we rocketed down Farmer in pursuit.

100 yards ahead, the thief, his legs pumping like crazy, makes a quick right onto a side street. I honk my horn and blow through several stop signs trying to catch up. Can’t imagine what we looked like; a white pickup barreling down the road and some big dude hanging off the side. I round the corner and I see the bike thief has dropped the bike and is now running away on foot. (I’ll explain why in a minute) Some dude with a thick brown beard in his 30's is picking up the bike. "My dad's behind us," the body builder yells at me, “Stay on him.” I glance in my rear view and see his dad close behind in a tan sedan. "Let’s get that mother-fu...r," the body builder urges me and I’m totally game, yeah I hate bike thieves’ too.

I stomp on the accelerator shredding the asphalt. I rocket down the block and squeal around the corner. We catch a glimpse of the thief jumping into the passenger side of an awaiting brand new black Jeep Commander. I gain on them. I suddenly feel the irresistible urge to ram the bastards with my truck. They take two rapid turns and my long bed can’t keep up. We get close enough to glimpse the number on their paper license plate. Dam… both the body builder and I had left our phones in the restaurant. We are forced to break off pursuit. The theives make their get-a-way as reason slowly returns to my adrenaline infused brain. I’m still shaking, man I wanted a piece of that guy.

We go back to where the 30-year old dude was and he's talking to the body builder’s dad. The bearded dude explained that when he saw some guy on an expensive road bike wearing levis and tennis shoes on clip less pedals he knew something was up. He waited for the thief to get close and freaken hit him and I’m not sure where head, leg, or body, but it knocked the thief off of the bike, thus said thief began running (leaving the bike behind) and that’s when we came around the corner. Bless you 30-year old dude with a thick brown beard and a very quick mind.

We thanked the dude profusely and returned to the restaurant where a crowd of restaurant guests were assembled all waiting anxiously to know what happened. I told them the story as the body builder called the police.

I didn’t’ stick around too long, had to get back to work. As I left, I saw Tempe’s finest pulling into the lot.

Dam, we were so close to catching the thief and I'd have given my Marzocchi 66 fork to have watched that pissed off body builder get payback on that bastard. The good news is that the body builder recovered his bike. Now we'll just have to hope the police get the bad guys.

Beware or trolling black Jeep Commanders with a temporary paper plate.

Tiny
 
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#5 ·
Agree with your first point... but you've NEVER done this? The Sedrama reference and sarcasm seems out of place on this new thread. Please keep baiting TD, though. You guys are a hoot. Hope it continues through the Alaskan winter. Can't get enough entertainment up here one the snow starts flying.
 
#6 ·
Careful for what you wish for. Come winter, he'll actually be in AZ so his posts wont be 100% trolling. He'll even be allowed on USFS land too. Maybe he wont be completing any unauthorized trail work and/or building this time.
 
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